Nat Hocken has reviewed 55 adult movies from top porn studios Private, Wicked, Adam & Eve, Hustler, and more movie producers . Nat Hocken's reviews cover scenes directed by Jim Enright, Antonio Adamo, Brad Armstrong, Ray Anderson, featuring some of porn's top stars like Felecia, Mandy Bright, Lynn Stone, and Sabrine Maui.
Nat Hocken's Movie Reviews (55)
Release date: 5/2/2003
Reviewed on: 2/10/2004
Studio: Adam & Eve
Starring: Asia Carrera, Steven St. Croix, Mia Smiles, Dee [II] (classic female), Randy Spears, Shaena Steel, Eric Masterson, Maya Divine, Flick Shagwell
Directed by: Bud Lee
Review brief: You know, if a sex scene isnt scorching it should at least look like fun. Free Ride has both: a fun scene with Asia Carrera and Steve Hatcher and a hot lesbian encounter featuring Dee and Mia Smiles. It also has three other scenes that arent particularly one or the other, but which arent any worse than average, either. So director Bud Lee hits .400 with this one, and thatll keep him in the majors. If you care, Free Ride is a ghost story about a woman blamed for defiling a rich familys son and forever afterward cursed to walk the same stretch of road until she should witness true love. Or something like that. It even makes a certain amount of sense up until that lesbian scene, when for some inexplicable but wonderful reason Asia Carrera, the ghost, suddenly turns into Mia Smiles. In any case, it all gets started when Randy Spears and Shaena Steele meet pretty Asia on a lonely backcountry road. The first scene, the fun one, is Asias explanation of how the curse came about. Steve Hatcher is the beloved son; Asia is the star.
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Release date: 5/29/2003
Reviewed on: 1/19/2004
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Tom Byron, Sean Michaels, Serenity, Chloe, Tony Tedeschi, Jacklyn Lick, Heaven Leigh, Mickey G., Alyssa Love, Reo D'Genero, Heaven Lee
Directed by: Jim Enright
Review brief: Serenitys a modern day witch who falls in love with mortal Tony Tedeschi. She could have him in an instant, of course, if she used her magical powers, but shes never felt anything like this before, and, as she tells her brother (Tom Byron), she wants to get Tony the old-fashioned way anyway, without spells. So what does she do? She spreads her legs on their first date. This could have been funny if this had been, say, the second sex scene in the movie and if the point was that Serenity is so naïve in the ways of mortals that she thinks if Tony will fuck her he must also love her. Instead, its the last scenewhich means its love at first sight, which means Serenity didnt have to bother, which means she could have spent her time making a better movie. Enchanted (1997) is a low-energy romp directed by Jim Enright. The last Jim Enright film I reviewed was Babes Illustrated 5. He managed to screw that one up with close-ups and poor editing. This time around, hes got a better handle on his camera, but a lousy ear. Okay, remember, this is a story film.
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Release date: 8/16/2003
Reviewed on: 1/3/2004
Studio: Metro
Starring: Kaitlyn Ashley, Felecia, Caressa Savage, Tiffany Mynx, Shanna McCullough, Monique DeMoan, Shyla Foxxx, Tracy Love, Celine, Celine Devoux
Directed by: Jim Enright
Review brief: Girls: Average to better than average Scenes: Four 2-girl, one threesome, one 5-girl group Energy: High Enthusiasm: High Emotional Intimacy: Low Kissing: Sparse Foreplay: Very little Toy Use: High, including dildo, two-headed dildo, vibrator, strap-on, and butt-plug Jim Enright is cuckoo for close-ups. Not the inserts that emphasize and enhance the action, the confusing and annoying kind that somehow detract from it. Being the respected, acclaimed, award-winning armchair porn director I am, I believe Ill give Jim a tip. Jimdont shoot sex; shoots girls having sex. Big difference, my friend. Babes Illustrated 5 was killed in the camera and buried in the editing room. It isnt awful, it just isnt very good. And this despite a cast of willing and enthusiastic girls who, with better direction (and fewer toys), could have made something special. This is a movie with a plot. Sexy, 40 double-D Shyla Foxxx is looking for the mother who abandoned her when she was two.
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Release date: 9/16/2003
Reviewed on: 1/2/2004
Studio: Video Team
Starring: Kitten, Simone, Kenya, Pebbles, Diana Devoe, Jada, Ayana Angel, Velvet Rose, Candice Jackson, Adina Jewel, Tiffany Cox, Sabrah Eternal
Directed by: Corey Jordan
Review brief: Girls: Average to better than average Scenes: One 2-girl, two threesomes, one foursome, one 5-girl orgy Energy: High Enthusiasm: High Emotional Intimacy: Low Kissing: Sparse Foreplay: Very little Toy Use: High, including dildo, two-headed dildo, vibrator, strap-on, and butt-plug Sista 17 has a terrific cast for the kind of movie it isan aggressive straightforward fuckfest. Pretty impressive, considering that the movie features 17 girls, at least one of whom was a lesbian virgin when it all began, and any two or three of whom could have sabotaged the whole project with lackluster performances. But these girls are into it; this is a movie jam packed with energy and enthusiasm. The cherry is no exception. IAFD credits Sabrah Eternal with four films, including this one, and her claim of never having been with a woman before appears to be genuine. On video, at least. She shares the first scene with Kelly Star and pretty Puerto Rican Simone, and if this is truly her first time shes got talent.
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Release date: 9/18/2003
Reviewed on: 12/28/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Ian Daniels, Felecia, Serenity, Eric Price, Shayla LaVeaux, Brad Armstrong, Steve Drake, Dolly Golden, Tabitha Stevens, Jon Dough, Amber Michaels, Devin Wolf, Alexa Rae, Sterling, Sydnee Steele
Directed by: Brad Armstrong
Review brief: When I was growing up my friends and I all had our own ideas about the ideal measurements for a woman. My ideal was 36-24-36. You gotta love a woman whose body so perfectly embodies your boyhood fantasy, as Serenitys does mine. And shes pretty, to boot. Though theres little enough reason for this film to be called Serenity in Denim, she is the featured performer, appearing in three of the films six scenes and running the sexual gamut from straight (a boy/girl coupling with Brad Armstrong) to lesbian (a threeway with Shayla LaVeaux and Felecia) to bisexual (a scene with Sydnee Steele and Ian Daniels). You probably already know which of these youre likely to prefer; I figured, for me, it would be the lesbian threesome. Brad Armstrong has made a pretty movie. Gorgeous women, nice clothes, excellent lighting, evocative, well-dressed sets. Each scene has its own visual theme; yes, its superficial, but it is pretty. At least one reviewer has likened Armstrongs visual approach to MTV.
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Release date: 8/26/2003
Reviewed on: 10/6/2003
Studio: Platinum X Pictures
Starring: Sophia, Victoria, Pascal St. James, Toni Ribas, Michael Stefano, Ben English, Dani Woodward, Janet Taylor, Mason Storm
Directed by: Michael Stefano
Review brief: Michael Stefanos Fresh New Faces 2 is a hell of a porn movie for undiscriminating fans of meaningless sex. Reasonably attractive girls, solid (if strictly utilitarian) camerawork, and everything from blowjobs to double-penetration to cum-swallowingits all there, just waiting for the right lustful overlay from the viewer to give it spice. Because spiceLordy, thats what this film is missing. Gonzo? Yesbut any comparison with the likes of Ed Powers or Randy West is way off base. Whatever we might think of Ed and Randy, its pointless to deny that they have personality. Its no use arguing that when they screw a girl, it isnt without bravado and a perverse sense of accomplishment. Michael, on the other hand, well, hes just in it for the sex. This movie opens with its best-looking girl, Dani Woodward, being interviewed by Michael in front of a slate gray wall.
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Release date: 1/31/2003
Reviewed on: 9/21/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: Roxanne Hall, Philippe Dean, Victoria, Anita Blond, Mona Lisa, Richard Langin, Philippe Soine, Dailany, Clarisse, Elysa Mell, Frank Versace
Directed by: Pierre Woodman
Review brief: I like porn, but when I watch the Castings movies I cant help rooting for chicks who tell Pierre Woodman that they arent interested in doing what he wants them to do. Theyre the underdogs, after all. And because Woodman occasionally includes a failure in his movies, their segments are far and away the most dramatic. Yet as Woodman himself points out, all the girls tell him that at first; certainly its a constant refrain in this film. So its the most reluctant chicks who are the most interesting, and no one here, in Castings 15, is more reluctant than Anita, an 18-year-old blonde who claims to be a virgin. So powerful is our desirelet alone our willingnessto suspend disbelief that I was mentally urging Anita off the bed and out the door despite knowing full well that the subtitle of this particular film is, Anitas First Time. Let me tell you a little bit about Anitas first time. This cute blonde who is morphed into a sexy vixen by the covershoot photographer begins by saying she wants to be a film actress.
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Release date: 5/2/2002
Reviewed on: 9/14/2003
Studio: Adam & Eve
Starring: John Decker, Michael J. Cox, Jill Kelly, Brick Majors, Alexandra Silk, Shay Sweet, T.T. Boy, Brittany Andrews, Peter North, Steve Hatcher, Roxanne Hall, Stacy Valentine, Mark Davis, Eric Price, Evan Stone [I] (straight), Chloe, Tony Tedeschi, Juli Ashton, Randy Spears, Liza Harper, Tina Tyler, Johnni Black, Shayla LaVeaux, Shanna McCullough, Mike Horner, Tyce Bune, Cheyenne Silver, Rebecca Lord, Angelica Sin, Silvia Saint, Tyler Sweet, Ashton Moore, Gwen Summers, Alicia Rio, Rich Handsome, Julia Parton, Angela Austin, Herschel Savage, Sydnee Steele
Review brief: I dont quite know what to make of Adam & Eves Girl Power, but I know I dont much care for it. All the boxcover tells us is that its about four hours long, so we can deduce that its a compilation. But what a compilation! This thing starts out with a series of blowjobs excised from various unidentified films, shifts into a compilation-within-a-compilationa film called Girls Who Like to Rideand ends with three random girl/girl scenes. All thats missing is the kitchen sink. Four bloody hoursand it never gets better than the first six-minute blowjob. Okay, maybe thats because after the 18th blowjob nothing short of Gwen Summers coming through the TV screen like that chick in The Ring to screw each of us personally could save this movie.
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Release date: 4/13/2003
Reviewed on: 8/25/2003
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Jade, Charmane Star, Sabrine Maui
Review brief: Ed Powers got a piece of Sabrine Maui before Randy West did, but Randy got to cum on her face; poor Ed has to settle for his signature buzz-kill: emptying his condom on her tits. Sometimes, I guess, you pay a price for being first. Sabrine Maui Exposed features the pretty, young starlet in three scenes. Eds, from More Dirty Debutantes 208, comes first, followed by Randys, from Up and Cummers 102. Ed gets her back again in the third scene, from Real Naturals 18, but this time she gives herself to Cherry Rain and Justin Time (a kid who never fails to put the boy in boy/girl). The best thing about the first two scenes is Sabrine herself. Shes very vocal and appears quite confident in front of the camera. Ed lets her masturbate with a dildo up to the moment she announces shes cumming, then he steps in and has his condomed way with her. Randy, too, must use a condom, but he gets his facial anyway. Randys trouble is holding it: his scene is much short than Eds. The third scene is the one I was looking forward to.
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Release date: 4/25/2003
Reviewed on: 8/4/2003
Studio: Smash Pictures
Starring: T.J. Hart, Aria
Directed by: Suitcase Jones
Review brief: My Play Toy, starring TJ Hart and Aria, is just about the nuttiest porn movie Ive ever watched. Now, I watched it because I was curious, curious to see what an interactive DVD sex simulator might be. Ive seen interactive scenes before and learned right away I wasnt a fan, but I thought perhaps an entire disc might be different. Anyway, it was worth a look. If you like these kinds of things, you can stop reading now. Like certain fetishes, I just dont get it. Maybe it takes an imagination in some ways shaped by video games. I couldnt tell you, though, because Dragons Lair was about as far as I went in that directionand if you remember when that came out, you know how far behind the times I am. In any case, what weve got here is a series of short scenes accessible through various menus and sub-menus. The main menus are Tease, Fetish, and Sex. Interestingly, Blowjob falls under the Fetish heading, along with Titty Fuck and Foot Fuck. I dont get that, either, really, though Aria takes a load in the face. But a load of what? I said this movie was nutty.
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Release date: 2/20/2003
Reviewed on: 7/30/2003
Studio: Lord Perious
Starring: Angelica Sin, Mercedes, Chennin Blanc, John West, Frank Bukkwyd, Katie Morgan, Fabio, Ben English, Thomas Gunn
Directed by: Shawn Ricks
Review brief: The premise of Warehouse of Whores is simple enough: a bunch of college kids wanting to save money for Spring Break answer a classified ad to earn some quick cash by boxing up whatever they can find at the location of a wild orgy during which several women were literally fucked to death; they find that the girls ghosts are still around and looking for some payback. Spelled out in an introductory scene, this is about as far as the story ever goes, though it explains why the girls appear out of nowhere with only sex on their minds. Each of the five scenes is strictly boy/girl, running on average about 14 minutes. The first scene is considerably shorter thanks to the actors premature ejaculation. Since this scene also includes the films most extensive foreplay, its actual sexual content runs only about six minutes. That sounds worse than it is, however, because the girl (Im guessing Mercedes) is an attractive, big-boobed brunette who handles herself well.
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Release date: 3/27/2003
Reviewed on: 7/10/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: Natasha, Philippe Dean, Eva Falk, David Perry, Dina Jewel, John Walton, Rich Handsome, Mona Lisa, Richard Langin, Nick Lang, Frank Major, Philippe Soine, Julia Taylor, Mephisto, Sebastian Barrio, Zsofi, Elone, Pascal St. James, Jennifer Red, Erika Fire, Jack Slater, Maria Bellucci, Frank Versace
Review brief: Portrait of a Private Girl. Shes sexy, young, and most likely Hungarian; a trooper who takes it in the ass deep, hard, and fast, and is nearly as willing to accommodate two cocks at once in a double-penetration scenario; shes a girl whos decided that if money comes without orgasm, so much the simpler for her; and no matter how many cocks are thrown at her in a given scene, shes going to make damn sure she doesnt give a respectable blowjob to any of them. Portrait of a Reviewer Who Loves Sexy, Young, Hungarian Women Who Arent Afraid of a Little Anal Activity, But Is Sick And Tired of Chicks Who Never Cum and Who Think A Headjob Counts as a Professional Sexual Performance.Oh. Well, picture painted, I guess. I know, I knowwho watches a Private film for the blowjobs, anyway? My problem is, unless theres a chick on the boxcover trussed up like a Christmas turkey with a ball-gag in her mouth, porn is pretty much porn to me, and I approach it all with much the same hopes and expectations; to wit, pretty women and great sex.
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Release date: 4/15/2003
Reviewed on: 7/5/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Melissa Monet, Steven St. Croix, Randy Spears, Tina Tyler, Shanna McCullough, Jay Ashley, Cherokee, Dave Cummings, Frank Bukkwyd, Alexis Amore, Aurora Snow, Cameron, Dic Tracy, Jim Enright, Jezebelle Bond, Fujiko Kano, Felix Vicious, Avy Scott, Cameron Cain, Terry J. Hunter
Directed by: Jim Enright
Review brief: Jezebelle Bond, I wrote in my notes for the first scene of Wickeds Second Chance, smiles like a whore whose only thought is to get Steven St. Croix off; she never comes close on her own. Little did I know the reason for that when I watched the scene. Director Jim Enright cleared it up for me later as I perused this discs Behind the Scenes featurette. Turns out that Ms. Bond appears here in her first ever boy/girl scene on camera. And thats an interesting fact, I think, but it didnt make me like the scene any better. However, I will say in her defense that Jezebelles performance isnt the worst thing in this movie. Written by Melissa Monet, this is the story of John, an old man (he looks to be in his 50s) whos just buried his best buddy, Harry. Or thinks he has. What John doesnt know is that his friends death was a sham, cooked up to provide him a second chance at lifein a younger body, with a successful career and all the women he can handle.
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Release date: 2/18/2003
Reviewed on: 7/5/2003
Studio: VCA
Starring: Sindee Coxx, Jeanna Fine, Misty Rain, Felecia, Juli Ashton, Tina Tyler, Kelly O'Dell, Nina Hartley
Directed by: Wesley Emerson
Review brief: Hollywood actress Kelly ODell moves from L.A. to a cabin in Montana for some peace of mind, but discovers that in Montana, if youre a lesbian, finding a piece of tail is a more difficult proposition. Wide Open Spaces (1995), directed by Wesley Emerson, is first-rate first-generation porn. I say first-generation because it looks like the kind of movie youd make if Hollywood were your inspiration rather than other porn films. The story isnt very good, but its serviceable and pleasant and it keeps the movie on track. It is, in other words, an excellent first attempt. I say first-rate because the sex is performed by a cast of cuties who know exactly what theyre doing and how to get their enthusiasm over on screen. Its rare for every scene in a porn movieany porn movieto be compilation-worthy. Im referring to an ideal compilation, one where the words best of actually mean something. Yet thats the case here. You know I mean what I say if Jeanna Fine is a member of the cast. Jeanna has her admirers, but Im not one of them.
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Release date: 5/1/2003
Reviewed on: 6/30/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Billy Glide, Ruby, Evan Stone [I] (straight), T.J. Hart, Pat Myne, Stephanie Swift, Amber Michaels, Kaylynn, Gia, Voodoo, Devinn Lane, Frank Fortuna, Nicole Sheridan, Kristal Summers, Madison Day
Directed by: Devinn Lane
Review brief: If you can get your mind around the idea that two of the Violation of series of films could win the award for best girl/girl, that the series itself could win as best seriestwicethen you probably have a higher regard for AVN than I do. While I dont disagree with everything AVN stands for, I think their credibility in the girl/girl arena is somewhere south of nil. Devinn Lanes credibility takes a substantial hit in The Devinn Lane Show 2: Less Talk More Action. Taking her cue from a top ten list devised by the editorial staff at AVN (the top ten things theyd like to see more of in porn), she builds a scene with T. J. Hart around double masturbation and camera babble (thats when a porn star talks to the camera, trying to coax a reaction out of the audience that the lousy sex isnt capable of producing on its own). The resultnot to put too fine a point on itis, of course, crap. But then Devinns sense of what constitutes good girl/girl is highly suspect anyway.
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Release date: 4/1/2003
Reviewed on: 6/29/2003
Studio: Hustler
Starring: Yoko, Nan, Kaylani, Ba, Nem
Directed by: Ray Anderson
Review brief: I like Asian girls, so Im watching Hustlers Asian Fever 11 and thinking maybe Ive hit something pretty good because the first scene has something. Its not a what, its a whobut whom the who is is anybodys guess since nobody bothered to identify the girls in this movie. There is a cast list, though, and the first name on it is Nem, so maybe thats her. And what Nem has is a convincing desire for sex and loads of confidence. Without recourse to dirty talk or violence, she quietly dominates the scene (and her partner) in the way a porn starlet shouldand just let the guy keep pace. Nem takes the cowgirl position to heart. Oh, its still inside the box porn, but its good inside the box porn, and Nem, at least, is pushing at the sides. You know, theres not another girl in the cast that has what Nem has, and that includes Kaylani Lei, whose scene in Babes Illustrated 12 was a smoker (although, come to think of it, it was Sabrine Maui who provided most of the sparks in that scene). The other four girls arent docile, they just arent as hot to get theirs as Nem is.
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Release date: 4/18/2003
Reviewed on: 6/25/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: Felecia, Julia Ann, Julian St. Jox, Frank Gun, Don Fernando, Swanny, Alain Deloin, Kimi Gee, Syren, Suzan Nielsen, Joe Verducci, My Lee, Zana Sun, Pascal St. James, Ian Scott, Asian Shan, Sabrine Maui, Nick Manning, Toni Ribas, Fujiko Kano, Lylly Berty
Review brief: Privates Asian Girls compilation is heavy on threeways. The dumbest one stars My Lee, Suzan Nielsen, and some guy. What were supposed to believe is that My and Suzan are lovers, but that My has an eye for the lads, as well. So when Suzan comes home one day to find My sucking this guys dick, she is, of course, shocked. Despite Suzans heterosexual virginity, My and the guy, however, soon convince her to join in. To this point, Im with the scene. Im groaning inwardly at the banality of it, but Im with it. And just now, at the point when our brains are supposed to power down so that we can redirect our energies southward, the sex becomes so stupid that it trips a switch somewhere and shunts all that clean, erotic energy into quite the wrong organ. It wound up firmly lodged in my spleen. I dont ask for so much. All I want is for a scenes setup and its payoff to have some relationship to each other. But if My and Suzan were ever lovers, it must have been on another planet, one where good sex means not having to say you eat pussy.
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Release date: 2/24/2003
Reviewed on: 6/18/2003
Studio: Adam & Eve
Starring: Ian Daniels, Ruby, Steve Hatcher, Kyle Stone, Randy Spears, Nakita Kash, Chennin Blanc, Keri Windsor, Cheyne Collins, Sabrine Maui
Directed by: Roy Karch
Review brief: It just depends on how you watch porn. If you watch it with a vengeance, narrative just gets in the way. If youre more inclined to sit back and let the movie do some of the work, even the stupidest storylines can make a difference, simply by humanizing the actors. Adam & Eves Bare Necessities doesnt have much of a story, and what it does have is typically inane, but the performers seem to like it, and it shows in the sex scenes, most of which are pleasant and energetic. The movie begins with an almost girl/girl encounter as Keri Windsor, who runs a lingerie shop out of her home, offers advice and opinion to Chenin Blanc. That the scene never really takes a sexual turn was not a move calculated to appeal to girl/girl fans such as myself, but what the hellI was still trying to figure out how Keri managed to make a buck by selling baby dolls out of her house. The answer, I think, comes when lovers Nikita Cash and Ian Daniels show up.
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Release date: 3/26/2003
Reviewed on: 6/16/2003
Studio: Hustler
Starring: Valentino, Joel Lawrence, Amanda, Zoltan Cowboy, Mark Ashley, Aimee Tyler, Hennesy, Alex Rox, Kelli Tyler, Zolly, Trixie Kelly
Directed by: Ray Anderson
Review brief: Hustlers Young Latin Girls 3 is a vignette film. The first vignette, Late for the Show, stars Mark Ashley and Amanda. It opens with Amanda lying in bed and Mark standing over her, telling herand I know youre ahead of me herethat they are too late to make the movie theyd been planning to see. Whats a couple at a loose end going to do? Ray Anderson wrote and directed this picture and I think Ive just given you a representative idea of what his writing is all about: its explanation (or exposition) rather than narrative. Why does this matter? Because Latin Girls 3 could have used the boost a decent situation, one integrated with the sex, can supply. This isnt an awful movie, but it isnt a very good one either. The young Latin girls on display, though attractive, arent terribly enthusiastic about their work. They make the right sounds and assume all the right positions, but they arent particularly active. Maybe its their inexperienceAimee Tyler has made more movies than her four co-stars combined.
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Release date: 4/10/2003
Reviewed on: 6/8/2003
Studio: Metro
Starring: Eric Masterson, Vanda, Kelly Fire, Richard Kranium, Brittney Skye, Anthony Hardwood, Mary Carey, Avy Scott, Ben English, Cailey Taylor, Hamilton Steele, Rebecca Love
Directed by: James Avalon
Review brief: The porno mind isnt necessarily a terrible thing to waste, but Im convinced that it is often terribly wasted. If the porn audience is so disinterested in dialogue that it fast-forwards through itwhich is a point repeatedly made in More Than a Handful 12why does director James Avalon begin each scene with several minutes of bickering? The answer, I think, is for comic effect; but its a weird joke that asks us not to fast-forward through the same pointless crap its poking fun at. The idea is none of Avalons plans for his erotic thriller are working out. Actors dont show, props are missing, and those performers he does have havent bothered to read the script. (I just came here to fuck, says one chick. Not use my brain. Thats why I left college.) Each scene presents a new problem, another reason to argue for a few minutes before Avalon accepts the inevitable and shoots the sex, hoping to restore the story later.
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Release date: 3/19/2003
Reviewed on: 6/1/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Mark, Serenity, Juli Ashton, Erica, Nikki, Brian, Keri Windsor, Eric Masterson, Devinn Lane, Maya Divine, Scarlette, Rene, Kristal Summers, Dan, Becca, Kira Reed, Barb, Sweet Georgia, Mark Webb
Directed by: Juli Ashton
Review brief: Juli Ashtons Basically Becca, tries very hard to be entertaining. Not entertaining in a porno way; entertaining in a regular movie way. I think Juli wants us all to grab a date, nuke a bag of popcorn, and settle down on the sofa for an evening of fun. Sure, its crazy, but I cant explain a movie that attempts to be informative, humorous, and eroticsometimes all at the same timeany other way. Its popcorn porn, and its weird as hell. Juli begins in an educational vein. After introducing us to amateur webcam girl Becca, Juli asks Becca to give us a taste of her internet offerings. Becca obliges by masturbating with a vibrator in a chair in front of a full-length mirror while Juli watches from the bed. Except that Juli doesnt just watch, she interjects a few questions somewhere in the middle of the show. Why? Because the sex isnt important, the webcam experience iswhich is also why Beccas performance tails off shortly thereafter without an orgasm. The internet experience is fully exploredthat is, exploitedin this movie.
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Release date: 3/3/2003
Reviewed on: 5/26/2003
Studio: DVSX
Starring: Pat Myne, Cheyne Collins, Loni, Sabrine Maui, Brett Rockman, Mark Ashley, Slim Shady, Lyla Lei, Denis Marti, Nyomi Marcela, Jade Feng, Kimmy Kahn, Aliyah Likit, Jazz Duro
Directed by: Alex Ladd
Review brief: Sakura Tales 2 stars seven chicks and a bunch of cocks. Yeah, its one of those movies. Alex Ladd directs like a guy who enjoys seeing girls get nailed but doesnt want to deal with the fact that he isnt wielding the nail gun. So, except when unavoidable, the guys are reduced to their dicks, which have all the personality of a biological Sybian and arent as fun. With the machine, the girls only have to worry about getting themselves off; here, the burden of orgasm is on the dicks and that leads the girls into one rote position after another until the obligatory facial mercifully lets them off the hook. Without question the worst scene in the film is the fourth, which is ideally suited to Ladds style. Lyla Lei, dressedas all the girls are at some pointas a schoolgirl waits for a friend by the side of the road. A couple of yahoos drive up in a truck and sucker Lyla into sex with the promise of a ride. Lylas a willing patsy, of course: she plays the movies only confirmed slut.
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Release date: 1/9/2003
Reviewed on: 5/25/2003
Studio: VCA
Starring: T.T. Boy, Debi Diamond, Racquel Darrian, Bridgette Monroe, Kimberly Kane, Derek Lane
Directed by: Gordon Van Der Meer
Review brief: You know why Racquel Darrian rates the title of 1990s Racquel on Fire? Because people like me see Raquels name in a movie and our pants start going crazy. You cant complain about marketing if youre going to let yourself be sucked in by it so easily. But Racquels one of those girls whos just too pretty for porn; watching her is like seeing that babe in the office elevator or the one you cant keep your eyes off of at the local mall get naked and spread her legs. She doesnt seem to have any business being in pornand I dont care how horny she is. Shes got two scenes in this movie. The first is a lesbian tryst with Bridgette Monroe, the second a straight romp with Derrick Lane. Shes not exactly on fire in either one. Thirteen years ago, Racquel was just entering her second year in the business and she was only twenty-one or two years old. Shes already got the looks, the charm, and the eagerness to be a star, but her technique still needs work. She gives Lane a lengthy blowjob, but never takes him deep. She cuts short cunnilingus with Bridgette in order to finger her.
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Release date: 1/24/2003
Reviewed on: 5/4/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: Gabriella [I] (ambiguous), Alberto Rey, Alissa [I] (ambiguous), Sebastian Barrio, Guy Joachim, Petra Short, Lynn Stone, Manuel Ferrara, Mandy Bright, Jodie Moore, Black Widow
Directed by: Antonio Adamo
Review brief: What is the other face of pleasure? It could be, if you buy the storyline in this film, a more exotic, riskier approach to sex. But I think its something more fundamental than that and a little more fun. The Other Face of Pleasure is Antonio Adamos sly poke at himself and his traditional approach to porn. Adamos fans may find themselves doing a double-take at this movie. It isnt what weve come to expect from the director: same amount of sex, same crisp and clear photography, the usual beautiful girls, but with a different emphasis. Adamo, who adores anal sex, provides only two examples of it in six scenes. Each includes double-penetration, another Adamo favorite, butjust twice? Somehow it doesnt seem right. And what about his money shots? All his actors cum, of course, but not one of them is allowed to do so on his partners face; theyre forced to aim instead for her tits. This complete disregard for the facial is damn near sacrilegious for an Adamo film. The other face of pleasure, it seems, is a lighter, more traditional form of sex.
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Release date: 1/31/2003
Reviewed on: 5/2/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: Jessica, Maria [I] (ambiguous), Eva Falk, Dora, Claudia, Nikki Anderson, Wanda Curtis, Silvia Saint, Caroline, Mercedes, Kate More, Daniella Rush, Claudia Jamsson, Laura Angel, Chanel, Sophie Evans, Klara, Lea de Mae, Ava Vincent, Estelle, Laura Dark, Sonia Smith, Sandra Russo, Lynn Stone, Krystal de Boor, Daniela Ogniberie, Devils, Geneviever, Natash, Raika, Vennse, Vornica Misel
Directed by: Antonio Adamo
Review brief: If you count yourself among Antonio Adamos fans, the Private Penthouse box set of six of the directors films from 2000-2001 is nothing short of a treasure trove of erotic entertainment. Fans of Sylvia Saint will want to pick it up for the four titles graced by this pretty blonde starlet. The lovely Nikki Anderson stars in two of the movies, and she wont disappoint her admirers, either. Private Penthouse stands as one the best porn collections the industry has yet produced. If you like Adamo. This collection includes Call Girl, Fashion, Dangerous Things, Dangerous Things 2, Italian Flair, and The Last Muse. Its imperative, I think, that you appreciate the way Adamo goes about the business of shooting a sex scene to really enjoy these pictures. Not the hack a lot of directors are, Adamos style is unique. Now, whether its uniquely enjoyable or singularly frustrating depends on what you like. My own view leans heavily toward the latter. What I appreciate most about Adamo is his eye for beauty.
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Release date: 9/15/2002
Reviewed on: 4/29/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: Claudia, Brigitte, Michelle, Sandy, Christina, Alberto Rey, Steve Holmes, Nick Lang, Claire, Claudia Clair, Michelle Wild, Bob Terminator, Mandy Bright, Robby Blake, Claire Robbins, Csoky Ice, Svytlana Pulse, Michele Gabriel
Directed by: Kovi, Antonio Adamo, John Walton, Andrew Youngman, Little Al
Review brief: Little Als Restricted Area and Andrew Youngman & John Waltons Wild Wheel Sex may be reason enough to pick up a copy of Privates Wild Adventures, number 7 in the companys Reality series. Thats not easy to say since these two scenes comprise only about 25 of the total movie. In distinctly different ways, however, they demonstrate how good porn can be with a little technical know-how and some imagination. Not that the rest of the film is in any way substandard Private fare. But thats all it is, standard issue. Antonio Adamo weighs in with yet another Roman scene, Romani Erectus, an MMF scenario that, except for the set, has about as much to do with Rome as Spaghetti-Os. On the other hand, it isnt quite as artificial as Kovis No Brake Girls and another segment called Bon Appetit. Both of these scenes are two-couple affairs. In Private movies, that means the girls rarely if ever touch each other and sooner or later one of them will be abandoned in order to squeeze in the obligatory double-penetration shots.
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Release date: 2/12/2003
Reviewed on: 4/16/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: David Perry, Alissa [I] (ambiguous), Francesco, Franco Roccaforte, Lynn Stone, Gina Blonde, Bob Terminator, Mandy Bright, Ramon Nomar, Vanessa Virgin, Robby Blake, Greg Centauro, Gina Dossantos, Fabiola Dos Santos, Csoky Ice, Lisa Hotlipps
Review brief: Two Asses in the Snow. Thats the title of the sixth segment in Singularity, the eleventh installment in Privates Reality series. It has a certain frigid ring to it. This, of course, is the problem. What I didnt like about Singularity is that all of the sex scenes have in common a businesslike approach that doesnt waste much time on passion. In the sixth scene, Gina Blonde and Vanessa Virgin are used by three guys like a couple of those latex sex dolls that advertise easy access to every orifice, except that these dolls come with a voice chip that moans with simulated orgasmic pleasure. The following sceneanother of Antonio Adamos elegies to Roman decadence called Veni, Vidi, and Vice (I came, I saw, and vice?)begins with Liza and Alissa unenthusiastically marking time with each other until Bob Terminator shows up for his Porno 101 lesson. The films other sex scenes arent quite as bad as these, but they arent much better either. Lucrecia Del Toros Aristocratic Sex is set in pre-Revolution France.
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Release date: 2/24/2003
Reviewed on: 4/16/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Billy Glide, Randy Spears, Shanna McCullough, April, Eric Masterson, Maya Divine, Olivia Saint, Aria, Stormy Daniels
Directed by: Jim Enright
Review brief: Forty-one year old Randy Spears (looking exactly like 41-year-old Randy Spears) begins Wickeds Best Friends as a college student preparing to leave for med school. April Flowers, his much younger-looking best friend, is worried that they may never see each other again. Written by Melissa Monet, this is the story, told vignette-style, of the ups and downs of their relationship over a period of several years, during which Randy gets married, has a couple of kids, and gets divorced, and April experiments with lesbian love, takes up with kinky Eric Masterson, and dumps him when she catches him screwing around with the couple next door. Its the story of two best friends who go their separate ways only to wind up together again, unattached, and mature enough to finally admit their love for one another. Thats the story, all right. Of course, its crap. Its crap because all the interesting stuff happens off-screen. Well, not all of it; Ill get to that later. Randys first sex scene is with Aria and it takes place on their wedding night.
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Release date: 2/18/2003
Reviewed on: 4/7/2003
Studio: Adam & Eve
Starring: Billy Glide, Steve Hatcher, Chris Cannon, Mike Horner, Nina Hartley, Joel Lawrence, Justine Romee, Alexis Amore, Nikita Denise, Kelly Warner
Directed by: Roy Karch
Review brief: Adam & Eves Mail Order Bride proves one thing: the girls do not control their sex scenes. Alexis Amore, interviewed before the shoot in a Behind the Scenes segment, says that she loves it doggie-style, that she hopes they do a lot of it in her scene. Her scene is with Mike Horner and the plain fact is they dont do it doggie-style at all. I wont say that Alexis disappointment is our pleasure, but in general its good to know that some directors actually direct the sex they show in their films. After all, its not much fun bashing the girls when it doesnt work out. The nice thing about this picture is that no bashing is required. The story is written around a mail order bride business owned and operated by Joel Lawrence and his mail-order wife, Nikita Denise. Its not so much a story with a plot as it is a situation with a sub-plot. The business is the situation; the sub-plot is an introduction gone bad.
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Release date: 12/18/2002
Reviewed on: 4/6/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: John Decker, T.T. Boy, Sindee Coxx, Kyle Stone, Mikki Taylor, Azlea, Katie Gold, Lauren Montgomery, Rayveness, Renee LaRue
Directed by: Jim Enright
Review brief: Crazy Like a Fox deals with a private investigator (Azlea Antistia) sent to a psychiatric hospital by the Attorney Generals office to investigate claims of corruption and abuse by the warden and his staff. Posing as a patient, and with the help of an idealistic administrator (Lauren Montgomery), Azlea discovers that the female patients are the main attraction in sex tapes being made by the staff and sold on the black market. This is one of those stupid porno stories that shoots itself in the foot; stupid because its a serious story that cant possibly be taken seriouslyby either the filmmakers or the viewersand still be erotically effective. Its the narrative equivalent of marketing a hidden camera movie and starting it off with a disclaimer that says the situations were staged and the performers are professionals. So its no surprise that the girls are into the sex and dont appear to feel as though theyre being abused in any way. Well, not quite all the girls.
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Release date: 1/20/2003
Reviewed on: 3/31/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: David Perry, Mike Foster, Frank Gun, Alberto Rey, Leslie Taylor, Barbarella, Claudia Jamsson, Steve Holmes, Nick Lang, Claudio Meloni, James Brossman, Rita Faltoyano, Dora Venter, Lynn Stone, Toni Ribas, Mandy Bright, Barby, Brenda Logan, Tiffany Diamond, Henriette, Dieter Von Stein
Directed by: Antonio Adamo
Review brief: Its not easy to imagine. A professionally produced feature film, an acclaimed director at the helm, an attractive castit seems ludicrous, impossible, yet Antonio Adamo has done it. Hes managed to make lesbian sex look pathetic. This has nothing to do with taste or preference. Some people like girl/girl, some people dont. Thats never stopped the girls from getting off just the same. No, what Adamos done here, in the conclusion of his Gladiator trilogy, is put on film a visual representation of the sexual chauvinism that preaches a good fuck is all thats standing between a lesbian and real sex. While Lynn Stone and Barbarella moan with heterosexual orgasmic pleasure in the foreground of the movies second scene, a couple of chicks remain interminably locked in a weak, quiet 69 in the background. Adamos close-ups dont add any excitement to the tryst; they merely clarify how unsatisfying it must be. Bad girl/girl is rife in the porn industry, but its rare to find a scene that makes it look quite as pointless as this one does. Pointless, too, is the Roman setting.
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Release date: 2/19/2003
Reviewed on: 3/30/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: David Perry, Claudia Jamsson, Karl Ben, Nicol, Julia Taylor, Rita Faltoyano, Mick Blue, Bob Terminator, Black Widow, Gina Callesi, Seurine
Directed by: Antonio Adamo
Review brief: I dont want to come across as superficial, but Rita Faltoyano (no offence, Rita) does not have perfect tits. Its a measure of how goofy Privates Big Member is, however, that she is introduced with exactly these words, as a girl with perfect tits. Theyre big, theyre round, and Im sure shes quite proud of them, but didnt anyone notice the protruding mole on her left breast? Akira Fubuki she aint. Minor point? How about this? The story is ostensibly about a whole society forbidden to have sex by a tyrannical leader known as Big Member. In reality, its about a bunch of people who complain about not being able to have sex even as they indulge themselves at every opportunity. Trying to make sense out of the story here is worse than a waste of time because it will only distract you from the sex. Trust me, its a distraction you dont need; youll have your hands full trying to fight through director Antonio Adamos arty photographic shifts. I think Id like this movie if Adamo had shot it straight.
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Release date: 10/17/2002
Reviewed on: 3/30/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Alexandra Silk, Sindee Coxx, Lexi Eriksson, Stacy Valentine, Alex Sanders, Jonathan Morgan, Mickey G.
Directed by: Jim Enright
Review brief: The best-looking babe in Wickeds 1996 release Allure is 23-year-old Lexi Erickson. She plays a high-priced call-girl whose job it is to distract one of the security men at a small museum so that jewel thief Stacy Valentine can make her move on the fabulous Allure diamond. Initially, Lexi comes off as neither call-girl nor porn star; she looks positively nervous at times, an impression supported by the fact that Lexi was just starting out in the business in 1996. She warms up to the part when she goes down on her knees. That helps: it makes even her trepidation cute. And in porn, experience isnt always all its cracked up to be. Earlier, Sindee Coxx takes Jonathan Morgan in her mouth and gives him one of those granny-style blowjobs (lips curled in and under) that are never particularly exciting. Lexi, the relative novice, gives giving head a good name, while all the while Mickey G. keeps looking at her like a guy savoring his occupational perks. Sindee eats pussy better than dick anyway, and so does Mickey G., which is to say Mickey eats pussy pretty well for a guy.
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Release date: 11/25/2002
Reviewed on: 3/27/2003
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Ed Powers, Randy West, Monique, Jeanie Rivers, Briana Banks, Kylie Wilde
Review brief: As I understand it, the appeal of Ed Powersthe man, not so much the filmmakeris that hes a kind of everyman with whom the viewer can identify. Watching him make it with pretty, young girls gives hope to the poor slob with a more common physique than all those buffed up porn stars. Be that as it may, Ed Powers does less than nothing for me--less, because I lose all interest in a scene when he makes an appearance before the camera. He exudes that creepy dirty-old-man odor that even today wafts up unpleasantly from the sweaty underbelly of porn. Which isnt to say that Powers, when he stays behind the camera, doesnt occasionally capture a little lightning. Both sides of Ed Powers are on display in Briana Banks Exposed. Briana is featured in three scenes and her unfortunate willingness to screw Powers ensures that he will appear in each as a performer. The middle scene, however, starts differently, with Powers encouraging Briana to let his cameragirl touch her pussy.
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Release date: 12/9/2002
Reviewed on: 3/24/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Shay Sweet, Julia Ann, Randy Spears, Mike Horner, Stephanie Swift, Joel Lawrence, Dillion Day, Devinn Lane, Lee Stone, Nicole Sheridan, Nikita Denise, Jenna Haze, Lezley Zen
Directed by: Brad Armstrong
Review brief: Sex on Film tells the story of film student Joel Lawrence who, thanks to girlfriend Jenna Haze, snaps to the bright idea of making a porn movie for his thesis project. And not just any porn movie, eitherevery porn movie. His script (its one of those deal-with-the-devil stories) is so generic that if it had been seen in Repo Man it would have had a white cover sheet with Porn Script written across it in big black block lettering. On his way to an F for originality, writer/director Brad Armstrong burns up most of Joels story with another porno convention, the talent search. I dont suppose any of this would be anything more serious than another wasted opportunity except that in this case the sex is as uninspiring as the storyline. The sex isnt bad, its conventional. Well-produced, crisp and clear, but typical American porn fare just the same; another sad case of a director failing to grasp the pointlessness of grafting narrative onto a sex film without a meaningful attempt at integrating the two.
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Release date: 2/4/2003
Reviewed on: 3/18/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Nick East, Tom Byron, Alex Sanders, Vanessa Chase, Chasey Lain, Barbara Doll, Nicole Lace, Alex Jordan [I] (female)
Directed by: Fred J. Lincoln
Review brief: Crass commercialism and a complete disregard for the consumer. This, at least, is the answer that springs most readily to mind when watching a movie like Wickeds 1994 release, Domination, which is one of those films that begs the question, Whats the point of slapping a wholly inappropriate title on a porn movie? True, it happens in Hollywood, toowitness Ballistic: Ecks vs. Severbut such instances are rare indeed compared with the institutionalized mistitling that goes on in Porn Alley. Whatever happened to the simplicity (and accuracy) of a title like Deep Throat? Its not unreasonable to suppose that the quality of porn would rise if porno titles were strictly regulated to ensure accuracy. If what you read on the boxcover was what you got, Id much prefer to watch Nympho Cheerleaders than Chicks Who Briefly Appear in Cheerleader Outfits Go Wild. In Domination, Chasey Lain stars as a woman who hears echoing voices in her head that tell her to drop the submissive act and demand the respect shes due from her psychologically abusive husband.
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Release date: 1/17/2003
Reviewed on: 3/18/2003
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Ed Powers, Nikki Dial, Ember, Nika DeVita, Lieng Lu, Ted Wilson, Gina Diamond
Review brief: Nikki Dial Exposed begins with a smiling, engaging, and very young Nikki in a scene from Ed Powers Dirty Debutantes 23. Even Ed, nearing 40, looks comically youthful. The scene, though standard Powers fare, is, thankfully, not one in which Ed takes a sexual role; the closest he comes to making love to Nikki is licking her juices off the dildo shes just finished using. Typically sloppy, the scene begins with a dog whining in the background, a little dog we eventually see nosing up to Nikki on the sofa; at one point the telephone rings. It takes a girl with a certain star power to fight through this nonsense and emerge with her aplomb intact, and Nikki does it, delivering a short, but effective masturbation performance along the way. One could wish that movies like this were made with loving care by people who genuinely respected their featured talent. But this is porn, and one could as successfully wish for accurate movie titles, coherent storylines, or directors who understand the difference between fucking and eroticism.
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Release date: 3/6/2003
Reviewed on: 3/4/2003
Studio: Adam & Eve
Starring: Steve Hatcher, Alex Sanders, Randy Spears, Pat Myne, Eric Masterson, Mika Tan, Miko Lee, Kianna, Kamiko, Kianna Dior, Nyomi Marcela
Directed by: Bud Lee
Review brief: Hi. Im Kamiko. My friend Miko Lee invited me to her house. Watch me fuck Steve. So begins the second scene in Bud Lees enjoyable Miko Lee and Friends, a movie with a premise as awkward as Kamikos non sequitur. The idea is, Mikos girlfriends have all been invited to a no-boys-allowed pool party. But this isnt an all-girl movie. Each scene but the fourth starts with one of the girls making it with a guy before moving on to the party (a party that never materializes, by the way). The fourth scene is the only girl/girl scene in the film. It stars Miko and Kianna Dior. Miko doesnt do a lot of girls, but it isnt as though she hasnt tasted pussy either. To watch her here, though, is guaranteed to make you wonder if she only goes lez for a paycheck or as a favor. The scene begins with Miko and Kianna catching up with the news of their careers. I dont believe Miko ever once looks Kianna in the face, let alone the eye. She plays the whole introduction with her eyes downcast as if she were staring at girl/girl for the first time and not at all sure she made the right career move.
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Release date: 1/24/2003
Reviewed on: 3/2/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: Sindee Coxx, Steve Hatcher, Evan Stone [I] (straight), Shayla LaVeaux, Cheyne Collins, Noname Jane, Lee Stone, Tanya Danielle, Marty Romano, Samantha Sterlyng, Calli Cox, Jenna Haze, Aria
Directed by: Barry Wood
Review brief: Help me out, will you? Ive got this great idea for a porn film. See, this chick gets conked on the head andandwhats that? Then we string a bunch of sex scenes together? Thats brilliant. Dont worry, Ill share the story credit with you. Porn really doesnt need to contribute to its own stereotype, does it? Yet I think the conversation between Barry Wood and Sindee Coxx regarding the Private release Your Time Is Up must have gone substantially like this, except that their chick (played by Jenna Haze) doesnt take a blow to her head, she takes a john to a motel room. Other than that, its identical, and the credits dutifully record Barry and Sindees cadaverously thin story collaboration. My guess is that because they managed to work the title into the dialogue at the end of the movie, Barry and Sindee thought they had a story.
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Release date: 7/3/2002
Reviewed on: 2/22/2003
Studio: Private
Review brief: What do you do with a sampler disc? Well, if youre a reseller, you check out its title listings, each with a brief synopsis, and try to decide which movies are worth adding to your stock. Then perhaps you check your list against the trailers. If youre an ordinary porn consumer, you skip right to the hardcore scenes. Privates DVD Sampler 5 includes a host of titles in various series, 20 trailers, and 3 triple-X scenes (which clock in at about an hours worth of sex). If youre a reseller, your return on investment might be worthwhile; if youre not, youd be better off adding the cost of this disc to your porno slush fund and waiting for something better to come along. Quantitatively an hour of sex on a sampler disc isnt bad. On the other hand, the lack of a Play All option means that you have to keep reaching for the remote, which, depending on how you use your porn, can be inconvenient. The real problem, though, is that the three scenes selected are not among Privates best. Two are fantasy episodes and all are threeways.
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Release date: 12/18/2002
Reviewed on: 2/16/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Steve Hatcher, Kylie Ireland, Randy Spears, Brad Armstrong, April, Cindy, Cherie, Lezley Zen, Avy Scott, Cindy (Czech), Sydnee Steele
Directed by: Jonathan Morgan
Review brief: For oncea porno title with some resemblance to the actual product. Wickeds Something So Right is right is on target, delivering hot sex and a story that works. Simple enough not to interfere with the sex yet basic enough to tap into our collective experience, the story does what any good porno story ought to do: it turns up the sexual heat by giving us a stake in the characters lives. It helps that the cast is headed by Randy Spears, who may be the best actor working in porn today. His marriage, once so exciting, is on the rocks and his wife (Syndee Steele) has marginalized his very existence. All she wants is an excuse to leave him for her well-heeled lover.
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Release date: 11/25/2002
Reviewed on: 2/16/2003
Studio: Wicked
Starring: Shay Sweet, Kelsey Heart, Ruby, Roxanne Hall, Missy, Felecia, Randy Rage, Charlie, Shayla LaVeaux, Dolly Golden, Stephanie Swift, Nici Sterling, George Kaplan, Brooke, Syren, Mandi Frost, Antonia
Directed by: Brad Armstrong
Review brief: According to her audio biography, Syren, the pretty Oriental who gets squaw duty in Brad Armstrongs The Good the Bad and the Wicked, carefully selects the movies she appears in, preferring those films that really showcase her acting ability. Maybe thats true. But I guess sometimes a check is nice, too. I cant imagine what else would have drawn her to appear in this picture. Though the boxcover, with its chicks in Old Western garb and the tagline, Missys in town with a few days to thrill, gives an impression of narrative, Wicked is, instead, a collection of seven more or less random sex scenes strung together like beads on a thin Western theme. No, not a theme, a gimmick: the sheer number of sex scenes tells you that much. Clocking in at just under an hour and a half, this film cant support seven sex scenes AND a story, or pay anything more than lip service to the Old West. So, sure, Missy rides into townpacking a big bag of nothing. Its up to the towns unofficial historian to jumpstart the action.
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Release date: 12/30/2002
Reviewed on: 2/10/2003
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Felecia, Linda Thoren, Bridgette, Rayveness, Monty, Melina
Review brief: On display in the New Machine compilation Felicia Exposed is a six-scene selection of Felicias work with 4-Play and Evil Angel directors Ed Powers and Randy West. So right away you know what youre in for: six straight cheesy motel/bedroom sets, low-budget production values, a bunch of third-tier lookers, one-camera shoots, and a lot of cross talk with the director/cameraman. Of course, after a list like that, Im supposed to say, And lots of great sex!to punch it up with a little twist, you know. But Im not going to do that; not because its expected, but because it isnt true. Ed and Randy make films on the cheap and sometimes they work. A film like this gives you an idea why. In addition to the revolving door that constantly brings in new girls, there are those little interviews that begin each scene and which give the viewer a slight sense of who hes looking at. The formula succeeds because, in a porno sense, these young girls arent generally very experienced and dont have a lot to say: one scene is about all we need.
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Release date: 1/30/2003
Reviewed on: 2/10/2003
Studio: Peach
Starring: Jenna Jameson
Review brief: If youre not careful, the Interviewing Jenna disc will drive you crazy. Its one of those interactive jobs that doesnt even have a Play button. What it has instead is three main sectionsJust Jenna, Interview Jenna, and Jennas Staffand there wouldnt be anything wrong with that except that the menu comes up with the first of these, Just Jenna, selected. Thats a problem because if you choose that route, you wind up circling back on the action a couple of times. I may be old-fashioned, but I think the option of seeing the movie in order ought to come first. Here, that option comes second. (The decision to put Just Jenna first must have been based on the argument that if the sex doesnt begin right away, viewers will tune out. Call me crazy, but it seems to me anyone putting on a movie called Interviewing Jenna isnt going to tune out if it starts with an interview.) Sadly, the menu is the least of this films problems. According to the liner notes on the boxcover, Your first assignment for Peach Magazine takes you into the secret life of superstar Jenna Jameson.
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Release date: 10/28/2002
Reviewed on: 2/5/2003
Studio: Hustler
Starring: Brandon Iron, Kyle Stone, Sabrina, Kennedy, Aurora Snow, Kianna, Gino Greco, Buddy Cox, Brett Rockman, Domenica
Directed by: Spike Zone
Review brief: The Jail Babes series is about four years old at this writing. Thats worth knowing. It dates the onset of my affliction. I call it porno myopia, for lack of a better term and for lack of a better explanation of how Ive managed to sit this series out all these years. To judge by Jail Babes, Vol. 23, Ive got a lot of catching up to do. I dont know that I can help the JB veterans out there. I cant tell you that this film is better or worse than previous installments. I cant tell you what sets it apart or whether its all of a piece with everything that has come before. What I can tell you, though, is that its 90 minutes of exceptional porn. So naïve was I that when I came upon this title I thought it was a prison flick. Well, for those of you in the same boat as I was (no doubt with a less embarrassing explanation for your presence there), Ill dispel that notion right now. Jail Babes, Vol. 23 is a collection of five sex scenes featuring four female porn stars who, at one time or another, were arrested and taken to jail.
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Release date: 7/24/2002
Reviewed on: 2/4/2003
Studio: Private
Starring: Frank Thring, Danyel Cheeks, Aysha Hart, Marianne La Monte, Melanie Rowan, Donna Starr, Allen, Peter, Olaf Sachenweger, Sam Weston
Directed by: Steve Perry
Review brief: Maybe its just me, but doesnt being a lord and leader of an order of monks solely devoted to carnal pleasures kind of lose its allure when your cock and balls are floating in a box in one of the dimly lit rooms of your grand manor house? It doesnt seem particularly troubling to Lord Edward of Willoughby, leader of the Order of St. Judas. The mans got moxie, Ill give him that. Id give him a cigar if I thought hed forgive the Freudian faux pas. Anal Manor, Privates second feature film, from 1993, is about what happens when American rock star Rosanna (Danyel Cheeks), her female assistant (Donna Starr), and her chauffeur experience car trouble on the way to a concert and have to seek shelter in Lord Edwards rambling abode. No mere coincidence, this is synchronicity of the highest order. Rosanna, who has never found a man who could keep up with her sexually, suddenly finds herself in a house filled with horny monks who have no trouble getting up for that erotic challenge. Where Rosanna is concerned, however, the monks have to wait, which, as it happens, isnt much of a hardship.
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Release date: 8/30/2002
Reviewed on: 2/4/2003
Studio: VCA
Starring: Rebecca Bardoux, Nikki Sinn, Tiffany Mynx, Sharon Kane, Randy Spears, Debi Diamond, Justin Case, Joey Silvera, Crystal Wilder, Bionca, Jon Dough, Kiss, Shawnee Cates, Stacy Nichols, Lacy Rose, Melanie Moore, Alex Jordan [I] (female), Terry Thomas
Directed by: Jim Holliday
Review brief: Return of the Cheerleader Nurses is an odd little movie about a group of ladies who all share the same name. Theres Mary Jane, Mary Ellen, Mary Jo, and so on. I didnt get it. Maybe someone was trying to tell us that all women are the same, or only superficially different from one another, and so theyre interchangeable. Thats kind of heavy. Maybe someone just thought it was funny. I still dont get it. Return of the Cheerleader Nurses is a sad, ultimately uplifting little drama about a man devastated by the theft of his prized baseball card collection. He cries, he mopes, he prays, and somehow all this self-pity pays off: his collection is returned to him intact. No wonder porn is for adults: what kind of message would this send to our kids? Return of the Cheerleader Nurses is also a spooky ghost story. Or something. At any rate, theres a guy who literally disappears at the end. I dont know why.
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Release date: 12/19/2002
Reviewed on: 2/4/2003
Studio: Digital Sin
Starring: Taylor, Monica, Brooke, Cherokee, Cameron
Review brief: I guess if I ever get hooked up to one of those machines that registers where your eyes are focused on the TV screen, I wont embarrass myself. You see, I dont much care for tattoos. Oh, sure, some are better than others. The ringed tattoo on Charmane Stars arm is all right, for instance. Its relatively tasteful and doesnt particularly distract the eye. The dolphins jumping around Chandlers navel I find much less acceptable in terms of size and position. The bigger the tattoo is and/or the closer it gets to a girls breasts or vagina, the less I like it. Nor do I care for back tattoos and ass tattoos. If I never saw another tattoo I think I could live with that. Anyway, one of the stars of Little Lace Panties 5 is a guy named Julian. Julians got a lot of tattoos, and theyre big ones, too. Hes got a chick in a short skirt on his abdomen, a large colorful something or other on his arm and shoulders and who knows what all else. But heres the thing: if he were a chick Id avoid his movies, especially this one, in which he stars in no fewer than three scenes.
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Release date: 5/28/2002
Reviewed on: 1/29/2003
Studio: Hustler
Starring: Nick Lang, Kylie, Lei, Mark Ashley, Ayako Tamura, Csoky Ice, Jang, Da, Tum
Directed by: Ray Anderson
Review brief: Nick Lang plays butler to Jangs mistress of the house in the first scene of director Ray Andersons Asian Fever 6. He lights her cigarette, feeds her a slice of watermelon, then takes up a larger slice with which to flavor Jangs nipples. After that, a couple of porn stars have sex. In the second scene, Chocky Ice, playing a horny neighbor, spots Da on her way into his building. He rushes to the elevator and conveniently bumps into her as she steps out. Its the perfect in: he invites her back to his place, serves her a glass of water. Then a couple of porn stars have sex. In the third scenehell, you get the idea. Anderson, like so many of his peers, directs two movies at once. No, hes not a master of multi-tasking, hes a multiple personality. Thats giving him too much credit actually: it takes a certain degree of creativity to form a second personality. I know, I knowthe bottom line in any sex film isnt the situation, the narrative, or the characters, its the sex. But look at it this way. If the plot is just so much filler, it isnt worth watching.
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Release date: 1/6/2003
Reviewed on: 1/29/2003
Studio: Adam & Eve
Starring: Billy Glide, Charlie, Chennin Blanc, Lola [I] (ambiguous), Cheyne Collins, Voodoo, Nicole Sheridan, Zana
Directed by: Luc Wylder
Review brief: I was looking forward to Adam & Eves Adult Stars at Home. I dont know why exactly. I dont typically watch such shows about mainstream celebrities; Im not a particular fan of the Behind the Scenes features that are a regular addition to DVDs. But I do enjoy learning something about the private lives of porn stars. Or maybe I crave reassurance that the people involved are involved by choice. Whatever the reason, I was, as I say, looking forward to watching this film. And, initially at least, I wasnt disappointed. At its best, Adult Stars at Home is hopelessly amateurish, but I expected that. Its even a little amusing the way the cameraman, no doubt so used to filming sex scenes, could never quite work out how to get a good shot of a room in any of the four houses he visits. (Once the amusement wears off, of course, its simply frustrating. Heres one guy whose Hollywood aspirations will never come to fruition.) The home tours are little better: theyre badly paced and meandering.
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