Joe Shaver's Movie Reviews (813 - page 23)
Release date: 1/21/2004
Reviewed on: 2/22/2004
Studio: Marina Pacific
Starring: Brian, Peter, Rick, Louis, Santana, Lenny, Cody Alexander, Tim Atwood
Directed by: Pat, Sam
Review brief: I first became acquainted with PatandSam productions when they only offered their productions on VHS. I found a couple of these amateur (but NOT amateurish) films on auction sites and enjoyed them. Since I no longer watch VHS, I had forgotten how much I did enjoy them until renewing my acquaintance on this DVD. Although it has lots of entry points, BOULDER BOYS (a pun on or misspelling of Bolder) is divided into two parts: The Saturday Marathon and Ricks Anal Awakening. The Saturday Marathon begins with Brian and Lenny seated on the sofa. Brian is short with close-cropped hair and is straight. Lenny is younger and gay. They strip completely nude and begin to stroke their cocks while watching a porn film. Brian has tattoos on both arms (including the Marine Corps insignia) its an average body. Lenny is very pale and soft. When they stand up to flog their meat and the camera pans behind them we see that Brian has a great ass. Pity hes straight. Brian cums and goes. Lenny is clothed when we see him again, but not for long. Louis has arrived.
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Release date: 2/23/2004
Reviewed on: 2/22/2004
Studio: Arena
Review brief: ANIMAL INSTINCTS is a better than average Brazilian film that features an array of handsome young guys. It alternates regular suck & fuck scenes with those in which a person has metamorphosized into a tiger-man. Our first couple seems to be at the zoo as the guys stand before a picture giving information on a tiger. They chatter away in Portuguese. Thereafter they retire to a secluded spot and start to have sex. One of them is a handsome blond; the other is short and dark and has a short goatee. The blond goes down on the dark ones flaccid uncut cock and brings it to a standing. This little guy has an enormous whopper. The blond shuffles out of his briefs and we think it is his turn to get sucked, but he turns away and getting on all fours presents his butt for impalement. Big Little Man accepts the offer and thrusts into the waiting hole. The handsome bond is fucked in a variety of positions.
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Release date: 11/29/2003
Reviewed on: 2/18/2004
Studio: Overthere
Review brief: The performers who range from twinks to mid or late twenties are handsome enough. The sex is okay. But the color is atrocious. The DVD looks as though it was photographed on out-dated or inferior color stock and then transferred to DVD without any digital enhancement. A slight reddish haze floods all of the scenes. There are only three scenes that go on and on and on. Except when you want one to be longer. We first meet the two twinks. The younger has short thin chopped hairhes quite cutewhile the other has thick curly hairhes quite cute too. They kiss until the young one drops his trunks to reveal a stiff dick. His curly haired buddy goes down on it. As he is being sucked the twinks balls rise and fall. Romantic piano music plays on the otherwise silent sound track. The scene appears to have been photographed in slow-motion. Everything is languorous. The sucker licks his way up the younger ones body and they kiss. Then the fellator makes his way back down to the dick.
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Release date: 2/20/2004
Reviewed on: 2/18/2004
Studio: Titan Media
Starring: Hans Ebson, Michael Ray, Steven Richards, Owen Hawk, Ben Jakks
Review brief: With STUD FARM, the latest release from Titan, photographers/directors Brian Mills and Harold Creg have devised another hot film. As we have come to expect with Titan, there is excellent photography, along with top-notch production values. The actors are manly even though there are quite a few younger performers in this one. Something of which I heartily approve. The casting of younger with older performers becomes more and more of a turn-on the older I get. The film opens with two of the aspects of work on a horse farm: feeding them and shoveling up their shit. Mature mustachioed Michael Ray is seen doing the former, and two young performers, Hans Ebson and Owen Hawk are seen doing the latter. These young guys take a break to slip into the barn for a bit of pud pulling. Hans has appeared in numerous videos and is certainly cute so it is puzzling that he has never made the mercury rise in my thermometer. I have no idea why. Owen on the other handand I have to use my other hand to write a review while watching Owenraises my temperature considerably.
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Release date: 3/24/2003
Reviewed on: 2/9/2004
Studio: Real to Reel
Review brief: Sometimes listed just as FRESHMAN BALL GAMES, the full title of this little opus is BORN IN AMERICA FRESHMAN BALL GAMES. It is a product of Real to Reel Pictures which started out making VHS films eons ago. Indeed in the Previews section these oldies are still being offered along with their newer DVD line. Then, as now, the emphasis is on younger guys. In FRESHMAN BALL GAMES, I doubt if any of the performers has reached the ripe old age of 20. Emphasis is placed on the fact that these kids are all homegrown. Each is introduced with his picture before his scene and the state from which he hails is given along with his nom de porn: Ty Kang, Illinois. I guess this is to show that Czechoslovakia doesnt have the monopoly on cute twinks. There are 5 scenes and each is introduced with a silly title. Only two or three lines of dialogue set up the action. For example: A blond twink is lying on the bed clad only in white briefs. Enter a slim brunet. Guy in underwear: Were you able to sign up for all of your classes? Slim kid: Yes.
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Release date: 12/24/2000
Reviewed on: 2/8/2004
Studio: Colt
Starring: Mike Davis, Bruce Craig, Gordon Grant, Mark Rutter, Moose, Mike Betts, Tom Blake, Joe Braggs, Hank Ditmar, Johnny Harden, Big Max, Marty Palmer, Tony Romano, Rick Wolfmier, Brutus, Werner Robles
Review brief: Long before there was VHSand seemingly eons before there were DVDsan enterprising studio calling itself Colt produced a series of one-reel films for gay viewers, sending thousands out to buy film projectors. The hallmark of this studio was to feature incredibly gorgeous ultra masculine men having sex together. It totally shattered the popular concession that gays were all wispy effeminates who lisped and had limp wrists. For those other than gays, it was jaw-dropping. For those who were gay, it was dick-lifting. Probablyfor fear of censorshipthe films were not overly explicit. Much of the sex was photographed the way our soft-core productions were filmed today. One knew they were sucking cock but one didnt always see it. Occasionally there was a brief glimpse to confirm ones suspicions that the dick was actually being sucked, but for the most part the action was masked or else dicks were simply kissed, lightly licked, stroked, and otherwise worshiped. And although these hunks were probably fucking, one never ever saw a dick going into an asshole.
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(zero stars)
Release date: 10/21/2002
Reviewed on: 2/6/2004
Studio: Le Salon
Starring: Michael Carr, Beau Matthews, Tim Kramer, Michael Christopher, Danny Combs, Chris Burns, Mike DeMarko, Brian Diaz, Paul Tischler, Sean McWilliams, Vex Werner
Directed by: Vex Werner
Review brief: What a total rip off this thing is! I had the VHS version and found it so uninteresting that I stored it away in a bottom box in my closet. But I had forgotten how bad it was until watching it on DVD. As a matter of fact the DVD is even worse because it cuts completely the last scene of the filma duo between porn legends Tim Kramer and Michael Christopher that was the only thing worth watching. But this is notI repeat NOTon the DVD. So why is Tims picture on the cover? To lure you into buying it. What we are left with is a dreary, choppy piece of crap that appears to have been edited by Jack the Ripper and silly, boring, lackluster sex. The first name of the director was Vex. It is singularly appropriate. The sound track has unceasing easy listening music form the 80s that will drive you nuts. There are sloppy chapter entry points and nothing else in the extras section. Added to this is the fact that it has been poorly transferred to DVD.
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Release date: 6/11/2003
Reviewed on: 2/3/2004
Studio: Bacchus
Review brief: A quickie production that is pleasant enough and would be totally forgettable except for Alan Gregory who transcends the material and makes the film. The director has wisely featured Alan in two of the four scenes. The premise is that of would-be frat guys auditioning for the frat members. The audition iswell, I dont have to tell you what it consists of, do I? Steve is the frat member approached in scene one. Steve is a surly mature narcissistic stud that allows the applicant to swing on his dick and bend over for a fuck. He is strictly trade with a capital T. The applicant is a skinny twink. Damon West and another friend try out for frat members Alan Gregory and Pablo Torres. The skinny friend is told to blow Damon. Thisas he saysgets Alan hot so Pablo takes the friend into another room and Damon turns his attention to Alan. Alan looks like Joe College. (He and a bare-chested Damon are pictured on the front cover of the DVD.) He reads lines well and has a great slender bod with light hair around suckable nipples.
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Release date: 11/9/2002
Reviewed on: 2/3/2004
Studio: Pacific Sun
Starring: Scott Avery, Pierce Daniels, Cole Carpenter, Jon King, Chad Douglas, Michael Ram, Justin Rhodes, Steve Wright, Billy Bonner, Dan Lundgren, Paul Sanders
Directed by: Ronnie Shark
Review brief: One of the practices these days is for producers to dig up an old VHS from the pre-condom days, dust it off, and put it on DVD. Some of these are fabulous gems. Others are rhinestones. Still others are rocks that would have been best forgotten. This one belongs in the second category. There are some legendary performers here. Some others are fantasies in flesh. But the sex is by the numbers and the whole thing rather lukewarm. Our host for the proceedings is Steve Wright, a hunky performer who appeared in way too few flicks. (Check out the back cover of the DVD. Thats Steve. Humpy, huh?) Naked on the bed, Steve strokes his hefty dick as he tells us about the goings on in his apartment building. Pierce Daniels, whose bushy mustache made him seem somewhat weasel-like, spies Chad Douglas (another mustachioed slab of beef) coming up the outside stairs. (Thats Chad on the front cover, smiling. Something I never saw him do in any film. In them, he was always as glum as Boris Karloff on a bad day.) Pierce is wearing only a bathrobe and he flashes the newcomer.
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Release date: 11/21/2003
Reviewed on: 2/3/2004
Studio: Pacific Sun
Starring: Andy, Frankie, Seth, Peter Smallz, Jodie Baber, Stan Tanner, Jaysen Hunt, Cody Gaines, Cole Summers, Shocka
Review brief: A more appropriate title might be TWINK TOES for this little epic as, in eight scenes, twinks suck toes, lick soles, and occasionally suck a dick. But shrimp is definitely given more emphasis on the menu than coq. First up is a cute, skinny, little fellow called Cody. He is skinny and nimble enough to suck his own toes, and that he does. He pauses for a while to pound his dick, but then goes right back to those toes time and time again. He eventually deposits drops of crystal cum on his thin tummy. Cole & Frankie are up next. One of them (I dont know which) is tied to a table while the other removes shoes and socks from the bound boy and sucks them toes and licks them feet. I am disappointed that they dont go further but I realized later that this was but a prelude to their return in scene eight where we find them both naked in bed and going the whole way. (Thanks to DVD we can jump ahead to scene eight if we wish to finish this duo.) Its another solo now with Seth. He is jacking off while perusing a straight fuck mag.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 1/26/2004
Studio: Oh Man
Starring: Eric York, Drew Andrews, Doug Jeffries, Cutter West, Chris Yeager, Mason Walker, Ty Davenport, Tom Moore, Brandon Phillips, Rick Fox, Paul Rappallo
Directed by: John Simms
Review brief: It is said that when William Burroughs wrote NAKED LUNCH he did so in chronological order. Then sat down with scissors, cut up the pages, and haphazardly rearranged them. It appears that the editor of this film has used precisely that same technique. None of the scenes here play through to their conclusions. The first two scenes intercut with one another as do the last two scenes, making this a frustrating film to watch. What in the world did they think they were doing? There are some good performers here but the way the film is hacked and hewed defeats anything they do. It is virtually impossible to get off watching it, and that is the raison dêtre of these things, isnt it? The concept behind this chaotic jumble is of a house of masseurs who dont ply their trade on call, just in. Of course these masseurs offer more than just a back rub. Mason Walker and Chris Yeager are the first clients. Their masseurs are Drew Andrews and Doug Jeffries.
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Release date: 10/13/2003
Reviewed on: 1/24/2004
Studio: Tipo Sesso
Review brief: As it title suggests, BAREBACKING ACROSS AMERICA is yet another of the recent releases where guys screw without condoms. In this instance they are very young guys indeed. We are given a great warning about the dangers inherent in unprotected sex before the film begins. A warning that is quickly ignored and forgotten as soon as we see these horny twinks in action. The action claims to be taking place in various U.S. citieshence the titlebut as the action occurs indoors it doesnt matter where they are. There are three twosomes in motel or hotel rooms and one scene that takes place in a public toilet. The twosomes are hot as hell; the toilet sequence is somewhat anti-climactic as a result. Nevertheless as the first three scenes are absolutely scorching, Ive given this DVD 5 stars when it comes to the sex. Our first twink twosome consists of Tristen Taylor and Kayden Scott. They, like all of these twosomes, are credited as being lovers. I can believe it, as they certainly know their way around and into one anothers bodies.
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Release date: 12/10/2003
Reviewed on: 1/17/2004
Studio: Arena
Starring: Tank, Bad Dog, JYD, Chad Llong
Review brief: How boring it would be if all porn were the same. So, its great that there are films out there to suit every conceivable taste. As a result, there are some films like this one that are somewhat limited in their appeal. I found this a very difficult film to review because the performers were definitelyrepeat DEFINTELYnot my type. Now I find lots of types to my taste. Twinks, muscle studs, gorgeous Europeans, ethnic guys, slender hairy guys, smooth totally shaved guys, guys with big dicks, guys with little dicks, guys with foreskins, guys without foreskins, masculine guys, effeminate guys--all can turn me on. But big burly guys that are advanced in years with hair on their shoulders and enormous bellies are just not my thing. Luckily there are guys who go for this type. Cyber Bear films are made for these viewers. The film opens with Chad Llong seated on the sofa reading. Chad is just an average Joe who has not taken good care of his body or watched his diet. Hes not fat, but the flesh is not firm. Tank enters and they kiss. Tank is well named. He is the size of a tank.
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Release date: 11/29/2003
Reviewed on: 1/17/2004
Studio: Body Shoppe
Review brief: The use of the word Raw in the title suggests that this DVD offers bareback fucking. It does not! In fact there is no fucking at all. Thats the bad news. The good news is that lecherous Uncle Don keeps his mitts to himself during this one. I always squirm with unease when he reaches forth that gnarled old hand with the wedding band to cop a feel of a young guys boner. He does pat a chest at one point, but the guys peters are spared his unwanted and awkward ministrations. The film follows the usual format of this series. After much talk of pussy, young straights (although in some there appears to be a gay guy bursting to get out) strip, pull out their peckers and jack off while watching straight porn. (We hear that continuous phony moaning of porn femmes as they get plowed in the background.) Two kids of the baseball cap brigade, Alex and Sisco are the first to appear. Alex is a scrawny, unattractive youngster with a mass of freckles and blackheads. He has a snotty attitude. The only things interesting about him are his dick and his low hanging balls.
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Release date: 12/11/2003
Reviewed on: 1/14/2004
Studio: Titan Media
Starring: Mark, Jason, Tyler [I] (ambiguous), Sean, Mario Ortiz, Rafael, Ethan, Troy
Review brief: For Manplay 11, the Titan crew has packed up its cameras and headed to New York City. And if you think the studs on the east coast cant compare with those on the west coast, think again. Since this series gives the appearance that all it does is assemble a group of guys in one area and tell them to go it, the success of each film depends primarily on the looks, horniness, and lack of inhibitions among those assembled. Of course it also takes a super editor to make something viewable and quick-witted cameramen to capture the going-on. There are indications that a sharp director has at least given the performers their fucking order. Still, one never knows if one of these films will be a stiffener or a yawner. In Man-play 11, I never yawned once. Titan has assembled a great group of eight guys in the Big Apple. There are slender bears, a couple of handsome Latinos, a smooth nicely muscled stud and some just darn sexy dudes. Some will probably go on to appear in Titans major productions.
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Release date: 10/17/2003
Reviewed on: 1/7/2004
Studio: Ethnic Man Video
Review brief: Expecting to see some big uncut dicks? Expecting to see those dicks put to good use? Well not with this turkey. Only two of the cocks could possible be termed big and none get really hard enough to be put to much use. It appears that these Latinos are all straight guys who have been cajoled in to performing gay sex for the camera. In other words, paid. They do it, but their hards are not in it. Repetitious Latin music plays in the background. Shooting the first scene with a lighted lamp and a glaringly white Venetian blind in the background was not a good idea. Even a novice should have figured that was a no-no. One of the guys in this scene does have a big one but watching his limp-dicked buddy sucking on it for ten futile minutes is a tad wearisome. I was just about to hit the fast-forward button when the dick finally achieved enough firmness to enter another orifice. But this was all too brief and disinterested on the part of the participants. (As it was to be throughout this tepid exercise in tedium.) Both manage to produce small spotty loads.
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Release date: 12/27/2001
Reviewed on: 1/7/2004
Studio: Channel 69
Review brief: Although the title on the cover says THE REPAIRMAN, the film itself is THE REPAIRMEN. That is indeed more accurate as there are three repairmen in this traditionally four-scene film. It begins with five bored guys sitting around with a board game. They decide to call in some repairmen to fix their boredom. The first repairman who comessupposedlyto fix the washing machine is a muscular hunk with a pizzle to go with his incredible body. Somewhat unfortunately he is paired with the least attractive guy in the film. Nevertheless, hunky repairman goes down on his client before getting his own tool charged. After eating out the guys ass, the repairmen inserts a string of ben-wa balls into the guys ass to prepare him for his hefty cock. Regrettably we dont see its magnificent entry, its just suddenly in and fucking. The scene is very well photographed. Good close-ups and a variety of angles that are just right. The householder shoots a great load with the repairmans cock still in his ass.
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Release date: 3/24/2003
Reviewed on: 1/5/2004
Studio: Cobra Video
Review brief: I hoped to start the New Year out with a good film. What I got was a great film! I have posted reviews for over 200 films on this site and have viewed probably ten times that many, but never have I viewed a twink flick that was any better than this one. Not only does this beat the pants off Bel Ami, but it is as good as any of those William Higgins golden oldies. The guys are all just 18, but they perform like seasoned pros and they do it BAREBACK. We begin with two solos from the straight contingent. The first is David. He is a spunky fellow in both senses of the word. He has removed his pubic hair. (Straight?) He has an interesting technique of forming his hand into a hole and then fucking it. He deposits his load on a full-length mirror giving us a double pleasure. Cain, our second wanker, lies on a sofa for his scene. It takes him a long time to beat away, but as he is awesomely beautiful we dont mind the wait. Brandonan eighteen-year-old blond beautyis discovered sleeping on the sofa after a night of sexual exhaustion.
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Release date: 2/21/2003
Reviewed on: 12/30/2003
Studio: Men of Odyssey
Starring: Rex Ruben, Michael Brandon, Andy Hunter, Ryan Chandler, Colton Ford
Directed by: Chi Chi LaRue
Review brief: You would think that with a cast like this and a directorix like Chi Chi at the helm this would be one hell of a film, right? Wrong! There are some beautiful studs here, such as the hunky Australian Joey Caruso; and some big cocks like Spike, Colton Ford, and Michael Brandon. But its just fuck-for-the money, folks. I suppose when one cranks out as many films as Chi Chi some of them have to be clinkers. This one goes Clunk! It starts with Spike and his lover Ryan Chandler sitting at an outdoor café. The waiter is having to wait as Ryan goes under the table to suck on Spikes spike. They soon move indoors and thats where the trouble begins. The problem is with a ceiling fan that plays holy hell with the lights on the white tablecloths. Its an inadvertent strobe effect guaranteed to bring on epileptic seizures. An orgy develops as other customers, the waiter, and finally the cook join in. And so for 40 minutes we watch these hunks having lethargic sex as the ceiling fan whirls about driving the viewer nuts.
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Release date: 12/3/2003
Reviewed on: 12/28/2003
Studio: IAAV
Review brief: Above the title STRAIGHT NAUGHTY COLLEGE STUDENTS, we find International Amatuer [sic] Adult Video Presents. That misspelling is indicative of the ineptitude involved in this project. In this slipshod effort wherein 11 Canadians sit on a black leather sofa where they are interviewed before appearing magically stark naked to watch a straight porn video and jackoff, the camera angles change through a series of dissolves and cross-fades about every 30 seconds or so. Not only does this distract from the action, but after a time it makes the viewer extremely woozy. Added to this is a moronic dweeb who zips in front of the camera from time to time. He seems to think that if he moves fast we wont notice him. WE DO! The chicken chokers are all from Toronto, a wonderful city I lived in for five years. They are a varied lot.
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Release date: 12/18/2003
Reviewed on: 12/26/2003
Studio: Big Blue Productions
Starring: Jason Hawke, Tony Valentino, Parker Williams, Dillon Press, Ben Campezi, Jim Slade, Damian Steele
Review brief: In STRAIGHT JOCKS CONFESS (or, as I like to call it, QUEER ASS FOR THE STRAIGHT GUY) Blue Blake has taken 3 straight gay-for-pay guys and paired them with four gay guys. Big Blue does intros in Black and White and then we have a short interview with each of the straights before their scene. The first scene takes place poolside with Tony Valentino [straight] and Jason Hawke [gay]. Tony, who used to play Rugby in Oz, is a hulking mate with a shaved head. After a swim in the pool he goes and lies on a lounge chair. Enter humpy Jason Hawke whose handsome face, beautiful build, and pierced tongue could make anyone gay. Jason dives into the pool, swims over to where Tony is lying, and gets down on his dick. Tony has a big one, and my but it is gorgeous. Oh, yeah, just like that! Tony tells the sucking Jason whose pierced tongue is doing wonders even though Jason is not the best cocksucker in the world. After quite a time, Tony slowly sticks his dick between Jasons meaty buns. Jasons cock is as stiff as a ramrod as Tony fucks him.
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Release date: 9/22/2003
Reviewed on: 12/22/2003
Studio: ManSize (Private Man)
Starring: Janos Volt, Maxim, Mario Perez, Black Jack, Lucas Foz, Kevin Kline, Nico Blade, Deny, Luis Casas, Ricsi Volt Lesz
Directed by: Sebastiano Brogi
Review brief: Theres good news and theres even better news. The good news is that Private Man has come up with a delicious piece of camp with their latest film MARC ANTHONY. The even better news is that this division of Private Man Studios is now calling itself Mansize, which suggests that they are going to be around for a while. Even though the cover tells us Marc Anthony conquered Egypt with his ass & his asp, I really wasnt expecting a comedy. (Weve all seen a lot of unintentionally funny comments on DVD covers.) But the cover blurb set the right tone. It is witty, clever, unabashedly campy, and beautiful to look at. In a prologue we see Cleopatra consulting her crystal ball for advice. (Think Nancy Reagan and her astrologer.) The big ball tells her she must wed Marc Anthony and bear a son. The first scene finds a nude Anthony asleep on a Roman couch. Anthony is played by Mario Perez, a handsome muscular hunk that is definitely husband material. His friend Lucas Foz enters and begins massaging him. Before long Lucass tongue is poking its way between the meaty globes of Marios ass.
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Release date: 11/21/2003
Reviewed on: 12/20/2003
Studio: Body Shoppe
Review brief: Straight guys jacking off, sucking dick, and fucking male asses is like watching dogs walk on their hind legs. They dont do it well, but you are surprisedand a bit titillatedto see them do it all. That is the secret behind the amateur films from The Body Shoppe. I would find the films a lot more enjoyable if Uncle Don didnt engage them in conversation so we see how incredibly dumb these guys are, and if he didnt reach out with that ugly old hand with a wedding ring (who is he fooling?) and grope these dimwits. (I just feel so terribly embarrassed for them.) CUM SHOTS appears to be a compilation of well, cum shots that have been gleaned from amongst the chaff of these films. We are spared much of the inane chatter about pussies and guys pulling on their puds until we think they are going to pull them off to cut right to the juicy bits with only a few moments of preparation before the blast. There are a couple of real beauties here. The first guy up is one of them. His name is Bob and hes a young uncut blond marine with a fine body.
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Release date: 12/9/2003
Reviewed on: 12/7/2003
Studio: Red Devil Entertainment
Starring: Kylie Ireland, Chad Hunt, Tony Scalia, Jason Ridge, Alex Leon, Sebastian Jaymz, Rob Romoni, Nick Capra, Michael Knight [II] (gay), Luis Nunez
Directed by: Jett Blakk
Review brief: At Red Devil Jett Blakk does not make porn films. He makes porn movies. Theres a difference you ask? Yes, there is. A porn film is one in which anonymous guys walk into a room and fuck. A porn movie is one in which there is a strong story, three-dimensional characters, and full-fledged production values. Of course guys still walk into a room and fuck, but we know these guys, and as a resultwe become much more involved in their sexual activity. We know we are in for something special when the credits roll over close-ups of a brush leaving paint on a canvas and Jake Renders fine rendering of Schuberts Trio in E-flat booms out from the screen. (Viewers may remember its being used in Kubricks BARRY LYNDON. Its beautiful yet at the same time slightly sinister. Incidentally, Schubert was gay.) The film opens with Ross an ad executive, played by the star Jason Ridge, waking up in bed with his wife, Janie, nicely played by Kylie Ireland. (Dont worry, guys, she doesnt have sex and she keeps her clothes on at all times.).
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Release date: 9/11/2003
Reviewed on: 11/29/2003
Studio: Channel 1 Releasing
Directed by: Chi Chi LaRue
Review brief: No, its not supposed to be A MANS TALE. And its not supposed to refer to getting a piece of mans tailwell, not entirely. In this charming fantasy from Chi Chi LaRue, Anthony Shawthat handsome, feral, longhaired, blond who is a voracious bottomis a merman. Not Ethel Merman, the kind of merman who has the torso of a man and the tail of a fish. Ah, yes, this fairy tale is indeed a fairy tale. In a prologuewhich in fact is really an epilogueAlex LeMonde that mouth-watering Canadien stares at the sea bemoaning his lost love whom he last saw disappearing into that vast expanse of water with a strange being. Alex speaks of his regrets at his shameful treatment of his lover Joe and his own infidelities. Now, in this cautionary tale, Alex warns us If you mistreat your boyfriend he [the merman] may show up and take him away from you.forever. We jump back to the time when Alex and Joe were together. The camera shows us a photo of the lovers on a bedside table and then pans over to show them together in bed. Joe is sleeping, but Alex is awake. He begins taking care of his morning stiffy.
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