Joe Shaver's Movie Reviews (813 - page 32)
Release date: 4/26/2002
Reviewed on: 7/18/2002
Studio: Spanky's Boys
Starring: Cory Stevens, Casey Martin
Review brief: First of all this film is deceptively titled. A gangbang is where one lucky soul is on the receiving end of a group of guys. In this film we have seven guys who separate into one group of three and two groups of two and remain that way for the entire film. So we can't even call it "Chicken Orgy". The guys are your assorted twinks, slender, tattooed, with pierced nipples, ears, and tongues (one has shaved his pubic hair). The film is very irritating in that the group in the background always seems more interesting than the one the cameraman has chosen to focus on. (This kind of film cries out for multiple camera angles so the viewer can chose what he wants to see.) The guys all had smiles on their faces, but they were more smiles of doing something mischievous instead of smiles of pleasure.
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Release date: 5/28/2002
Reviewed on: 7/18/2002
Studio: YMAC
Review brief: There is no doubt that Brandon is a cute little twink, but he is either very inhibited or hopelessly straight. The premise is one that has been used hundreds, nay thousands, of times before: the parents have gone away to leave the kid home alone. Naturally he invites two friends over. They get him drunk on one beer. As he is sleeping a bleached blond kid sucks his cock while the other sucks his face. Eventually, after eons of this, one of the friends fucks the blond who continues to suck on Brandon's dick. The blond has the biggest, hardest cock--and it's uncut--but no one pays any attention to it. Damn! Obviously blondie is the only one who's gay. All jack themselves off to end the scene. Next we have two guys who flop down in one of the bedrooms. (Who are these guys?) They are a blond and a brunet. They are both very sweet. The blond gives the brunet an impassioned fuck. Our blond from scene one (the one with the big uncut dick) is swimming in the pool. He enters to find Leo DaSilver in a sleeping bag on the floor.
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Release date: 7/6/2002
Reviewed on: 7/16/2002
Studio: YMAC
Starring: Roman
Review brief: Tired of the same ol cocks and the same ol faces? If so, this DVD might be for you. YMAC International has gone to Russia amidst a group known as the Kazaks. They wear baggy trousers and Santa Claus hats, but they are among the most beautiful men on earth. The film opens with a young twink on horseback riding into the encampment. His fellow Kazaks are amusing themselves by whipping a naked young man they have bound to a table. Our rider is only momentarily distracted as he is carrying a message for the chieftain. Unfortunately the chieftain is in the midst of buggering a blond lady. He stops what he is doing, waves the lady away, reads the letter, and then decides to finish getting his rocks off by buggering the messenger. The buggering is faked, but the chieftain is such a gorgeous masculine twenty-something hunk--just bulging with natural muscles-- that I was quite content just to stare at him and not complain that the messenger wasnt really being penetrated. (The messenger should have been the one complaining.) Cut to: A young man with a shaved head examining a horses cock.
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Release date: 10/4/2000
Reviewed on: 7/14/2002
Studio: Legend
Review brief: There are two porn performers I attempt to avoid: Paul Morgan and Jay Richards. For Richards its the puffy face and the ancient sagging body that resembles a snail out of his shell; for Morgan its the obnoxious personalityconceited, cocky, and chattering constantly. As Ben Franklin once observed, The man who is love with himself will have no rivals. The Raw Meat series gives Morgan the opportunity to flaunt this persona non grata. But as Emilio Sands (whom I adore), Chris Young (whom I lust after) and Logan Runner, aka Timmy Smith (another lustful object) were appearing in this film, I succumbed and bought it. Imagine my disgust to find Motor-Mouth Morgan in every fucking scene! It opens with a segment called Anal Vacation with the ubiquitous Paul driving down the road chattering away on a cell phone. After a time of tuning out his incessant chatter, we see he is getting a blowjob from none other than Emilio Sands as he drives. Emilio is one of the cutest Latino twinks to come down the pike or, in this case, the turnpike.
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Release date: 7/19/2000
Reviewed on: 7/13/2002
Studio: Legend
Starring: Mark, Paul Morgan, Eduardo, Brad, Duncan, Greg
Review brief: Another entry into this C grade series directed by Paul Morgan. It is divided into the standard 4 segments which are loosely tied together by the theme of cooking outdoors. First up in a scene called "Anal BBQ" we find the ubiquitous Paul Morgan (God, but I'm tired of seeing this asshole in films!) along with newcomer Greg Clarke. Both are wearing aprons and silly chef's hats. Paul is preparing to cook "Trout in garlic ass butter" and explaining everything to us and Greg in his typically garrulous, foul-mouthed manner that he must think is hip or amusing. (It aint!) A rear shot shows Paul is wearing no underwear under his apron; Greg is wearing white briefs. Becoming annoyed with Paul's chatter and somewhat nauseated by watching his fingernail-bitten hands preparing food, I fast forwarded to the action. This begins (finally!) with Paul massaging Greg's buns through the underwear, lowering the underwear, and kissing the boy's bare buns. One thing you can say about Paul is that he's always rock-hard and Greg does a nice job sucking the rampant tool.
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Release date: 1/16/2002
Reviewed on: 7/12/2002
Studio: Dolphin
Starring: Andrew, Alexander, Andrey, Vitaliy
Review brief: Three adorable Russian twinks set out on a fishing trip and stop outside a house to pick up the fourth member of the group. One of them goes inside to get their friend. He has overslept and opens the door stark naked. "I didn't know you slept in the nude," he says (or so the sub-titles tell us). They go at it. Soon both are nude on the bed while the guys outside begin to become a bit impatient. The late sleeper fucks his friend and they all set off for the river. We then have a number of scenes of outdoor suck-and-fucks. Some start in the river. Some start by a haystack. In one scene a beautiful boy rides in on horseback stops to observe two twinks making out at a haystack and jacks off watching them. The guys are all young and are beautiful beyond compare, but the sex is not stimulating to watch. Often because the camera gives us a too long close-up of an anonymous cock plunging into an anonymous asshole.
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Release date: 5/30/2002
Reviewed on: 7/7/2002
Studio: Cadro
Starring: Marcus, Forro, Tibor, Bige, Prince, Gary Miles, Huba, Andreas Von Stahl, Misha, Akos, Chris Baracqua
Directed by: Steve Cadro
Review brief: This film is another super example of Steven Cadros desire to turn gay porn into high art. The film features many of Cadros cadre of humpy, hung Hungarians including my favorite who appeared with Kristen Bjorn as Sergei Jordanov and appears in others under a variety of names including, as he does here, as Tom of Hunland. There is a plot. Two young entrepreneurs Vad Gabor and Bob Boxer are hired to find a sword once belonging to the great Attila. Vad, whose name is inverted in the credits as Gabor Vad (in the Hungarian fashion), is an attractive blond with a slightly muscular build and a not so slight cock...in fact, a very BIG cock. Bob, whose name is obviously a name chosen for film as he is the most Hungarian looking guy here, is also blond, with a swimmers build and perky nipples. Our young, hung heroes begin in Budapest and move on to Vienna where they are to pick up the commission to find the grave of Attila the Hun and get the magical sword which was buried with him.
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Release date: 7/11/2001
Reviewed on: 7/5/2002
Studio: Sunshine
Starring: Chaz Carlton, Rick Rogue, Matt Windsor, Joe Romero, Sean Adams, Dean Johnson, Dirk Knight, Christian Milano
Review brief: Although the guys are pretty average looking, the sex is pretty good. First up we have blond Christian Milano cooking a gourmet dinner for his boyfriend Joe Romero. (Spaghetti with a bottled sauce is gourmet? Whats the usual? Peanut butter and Jelly?) Joe arrives with flowers but is far more interested in the noodle and meatballs between Christians legs than those cooking on the stove. Christian protests a bit about it ruining dinner, but Joe is one of the best cocksuckers in the business and Christian quickly gives in, chows down on Joe, and lets Joe screw him on the kitchen table. Dean Johnson is napping on a bed after showering, clad only in a towel that has crept up to fully reveal the family jewels. Attractive Shawn Adams enters and proceeds to a jewel heist. As he stops fingering the merchandise and starts to suck, Dean wakes up. Naturally, he is not in the least perturbed. Shawn continues to suck until both are naked and into a sixty-nine.
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Release date: 5/19/2002
Reviewed on: 6/30/2002
Studio: Pleasure
Starring: Eric Price, Cole Taylor, Corey Monroe, Tim Fox, Eric Manchester, Robby Most, Scott Sampsom, Darryl Weld
Review brief: The only way straights like to screw gays is in their pocketbooks. So theyve done it again by bringing out a 1988 gay porn flick entitled 57 PICK-UP directed by a straight man that was a bummer then and is a bummer now. Age has not transformed it into a classic. Just listening to the plot it sounds pretty good. Country boy Charlie Stone stereotypically dressed in bib overalls with no shirt and barefoot wants to go to Los Angeles for the weekend. He calls friend Cole Taylor to go along but Cole has to tend bar for the weekend. Dumbass Charlie tooling around in his beat up 57 pick-up truck (hence the title) gets lost. He stops to ask another wisp of a yokel, Darryl Weld, directions. Daryll stops pitching hay and they head back to the barn for a map. Talking about how horny they both are, Daryll suggests that he and Charlie get it on as a cousin once taught him how. He sucks on Charlies cock and Charlie says he likes it, but his cock stays as limp as Liberaces wrist. Daryl sucks and sucks, but Charlie gets no erection. Cut to Charlie putting his cock into Daryll.
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Release date: 5/24/2002
Reviewed on: 6/30/2002
Studio: Horizon
Starring: Peter Wilder, Dante, Leo DeSilver, Shawn Young
Review brief: Im not a fan of solo films. When it comes to masturbation, I get enough of that already. But this one is better than most. It starts off with Nick Steel being awakened by the phone. He tells us we dont have to leave, just be quiet while he talks. To keep us amused, he starts beating his pud and continues to do so until he cums. End of phone conversation; end of scene.[3.5*] We then encounter humpy Peter Wilder by the pool. He sits in a reclining pool chair, fishes his worm from the leg of his bathing suit and begins to bait us. This is a very slow scene. It was better when I put the DVD on 2X, better still at 4X; and finally, 16X to the end. [1*] Things started coming up with Dante of the big schlong preparing a bubble bath, washing that great bod, and then retiring to the bedroom to play with the monster. I was getting into this, but the camera was in the wrong position for the money shot and by the time it was where it should have been there was nothing but a puddle on Dantes belly as proof he had cum at all.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 6/29/2002
Studio: Vivid Raw
Starring: Gina, Gino Gultier, Drew Andrews, Janis Jones, James Perry, Geneva, Lilienne Li, Chris Ramone, Vince Harrington, Karen Dior, Adam Alden, Brad Eriksen, Boy Mike
Review brief: I picked this one up in a moment of madness (Im an obsessive-compulsive) because it was only 5 dollars in an auction site. It sat ignored for months before I managed to view it. Imagine my surprise to discover that I actually liked it! It is very elaborately done (for porn standards) with sets and costumes, and it is very, very funny. My biggest surprise, however, was that it was also very sexy, since Im not into drag queens or transsexuals. Lilienne Li (one of the latter) is Genderella whom we meet sweeping cinders on the hearth with the rattiest broom I have ever seen. It is totally useless. (Just like Liliennes cock as we shall soon see.) The two ugly stepsisters enter with cute young Chris Young in tow. (Chris is not listed on the cover, nor in the credits. I know he once appropriately used Chicken Young as a moniker and may be using another one here, but Chris Young is the name he decided to keep.) Chris is one of those little guys with big dicks that we would love to cuddle up to and his dick is perpetually hard even when he is in bed with these two dogs. Dogs.
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Release date: 3/20/2002
Reviewed on: 6/25/2002
Studio: Dolphin
Starring: Peter, Nikita, Dennis, Igor, Vasiliy
Directed by: Alex Clark
Review brief: TWINK LOVERS THIS IS YOUR VIDEO! If you are into very, very cute, very very, young looking guys with very, very big dicks, then this video is not to be missed. These young Russians are absolutely adorable! All have foreskins, and very big dicks. In scene four which begins in a river, a kid in a baseball hat appears to carry his own bat between his legs. It's hard to believe these guys are eighteen. But they must be, right? I mean the producers wouldn't lie about their ages, would they? I would have pegged them at 16 with one guy at a mere 14. Foolish me. I guess these guys just celebrated their eithteenth birthdays by appearing in a porn flick. Yeah, that's it. There are SIX scenes! And each of these follows the same formula. A sucks B; then B sucks A; then they fuck. Sometimes one jacks the other off and then they fuck. But in spite of the monotony of the action, these beauties will keep you enthralled. It took me over six days to finish this film and it used up a whole bottle of lube. If you are into butch men this one is not for you.
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Release date: 5/28/2002
Reviewed on: 6/7/2002
Studio: Falcon Studios
Starring: George Vidanov, Franco Corsini, Janos Volt, Adam Gosett, Jozsef Kovacs, Marko Pacyna, John Valko, Alex Lambert, Remus Orza, Miklos Soledad, Nicholas Kiss
Review brief: Once again Falcon has collected a number of prime studs from their international stable, including their superstar George Vidanov and the handsome Janos Volt. Everyone is a fireman in this one and at one point they rush off to a fire that has been started by a careless smoker, but it's what goes on in the firehouse that is of interest to us. In the opening scene the captain, Remus Orza, tries out the new recruit, Franco Corsini,......literally! Franco is very cute and could any job he applied for. The next scene features George Vidanov in the shower, letting the water (and us) pour over his gorgeous bod. (In the version only available from Falcon he sticks the showerhead up his butt and then shoots out a stream of clear liquid. Personally, no matter what a gorgeous hunk Vidanov is, it's not worth $40 dollars more to see him shoot clear water out of his butt for forty seconds; so don't get suckered into this!) George is joined in the shower by Janos Volt, and the two demigods pleasure one another orally. Ignoring the alarm call, they move to the locker room and into each other.
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Release date: 3/3/2002
Reviewed on: 5/27/2002
Studio: Man's Best
Starring: Peter Nemet, Mirc Lauko
Review brief: If you think Man's Best only offers twinks, think again! This one is filled with mature hunks as well. The film opens with an old Russian Soldier on the train going to meet the American officer he fell in love with at the end of World War II when they patrolled the border between East and West Germany in 1945. We flash back to both groups arrival and the growing sense of camaraderie among the men. The first romance occurs on late night patrol when the American soldier on duty offers his Russian counterpart a cigarette. When the watch is over, they retire to a cozy sofa to pass the lonely hours. Luc Beson plays the young Russian and he is a very cute kid. Surprisingly, he tops his more mature American buddy. In another sequence, one of the Russians is wounded on patrol and the American medic nurses him back to health. The sex is very good in all of the scenes, as these guys really seem to be into one another. Both the Russian commander, Andreas Golby and the American Commander, Miro Lauko both have a sex scene with another guy before these two handsome hunks get it on together.
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Release date: 10/3/2001
Reviewed on: 5/27/2002
Studio: XTC Studios
Starring: Dino Phillips, Seth Black, Patrick Ives, Leo Masters, Dan Dixon, Jeff Mitchell, Sweet William
Review brief: Someone came up with a clever idea: to parody the white house intern scandal with a gay version of same. Having done that they obviously didn't think they had to do more. What a brilliant opportunity thrown away! Dino Phillips is the President and Seth Black is the new intern. Now I like both of these perfomers, but they just go through the motions here. They don't even attempt to feign interest in one another. It's just let's do it, get the check, and go home. So Dino screws Seth with a huge picture of George Washington on the desk watching it all. There are two additional scenes with white house staff members, but they aren't any better. And there's a final scene with the President's favorite intern, Leo Masters. But once again, the Prez seems indifferent. Maybe, he's worried about the state of the economy. As I said, this could have been a fun film with Seth turning into a Monica Lewinski, attempts to dissuade him...the possibilites are endless! Why didn't anyone pursue them? Because they knew the concept alone would sell this film.
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Release date: 11/12/2001
Reviewed on: 5/24/2002
Studio: Atkol Video
Starring: Casey Donovan, John Vernon, Paul Hamilton, Wolfe, Jon King, Dwan, Jamie Wingo, Fred Gormley, Pat Allen, Philip Wagner, Christopher Parrish, Ken Diamond, Prince Pennece, Rick Warrone, William L. Kane
Directed by: Henry Mach
Review brief: This film is a historical curiosity in that it is one of the first (if not THE first) gay porn films to stress safe sex. The A.I.D.S. epidemic was at its most terrifying, and the producers of this film wanted to show its audience that sex could be fun while safe. Well, its certainly safe, these guys wont even suck a cock unless its sealed up tight in an opaque condom. But its not much fun. The plot concerns two wrestling buddies who do an awful lot of crotch grabbing in their matches, and they sleep in the same bed but have never recognized the sexual nature of their relationship. High school is over and Gary (Pat Allen) is going into the army while Hal (William L. Kane) is going to grad school. They keep in touch through letters. One day in the gym, Hal gets Jon King to spot him. Jon shows Hal his cock and proceeds to kiss him while fucking him between the legs (frigging, I think English public schoolboys call it.). Jon comes on Hals leg. Its a case of cum on my leg and Ill follow you anywhere but Jon tells the awakened Hal, I have a boyfriend.
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Release date: 5/16/2002
Reviewed on: 5/21/2002
Studio: YMAC
Review brief: Anyone who has visited Canada and the city of Montreal, knows that Quebec is called the beautiful province not just for its scenery but for its beautiful young men. If not, here is your chance to find that out. The plot centers around Johnny Lawrence whose lover, Brandon Royal, was killed by a mugger. We first see Johnny in the cemetery placing flowers on the grave. Then ten months pass, and Johnny decides to come out of mourning. He comes out with a very slender and bronzed young man played by Lucas Kylan, Jr. whose sexual charms are enhanced by having both nipples pierced. As they kiss their way up the stairs to Lucas apartment the ghost of Brandon appears, venting his frustration. Once inside the apartment the boys chow down on each others uncut truncheons and Johnny boffs Lucas. The contrast between Johnnys milky white body and Lucas bronzed one is entrancing. After Lucas has cum, Johnny licks the residue off Lucas prick. The ghost is now wandering the streets aimlessly and spies Joey, an adorable blond, reading a magazine.
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Release date: 8/1/2001
Reviewed on: 5/20/2002
Studio: All Worlds Video
Starring: Rick Ritter
Directed by: Dirk Yates
Review brief: Rod Barry and his lover Dean go to the station to pick up Rods nephew, Rick Ritter. Dean is unhappy because he thinks Ricks visit will put a crimp in his sex life. Rick arrives in his tight-fitting sailor suit. As soon as they get home Rick wants to shower so we get our first glimpse of his buff bod. (Rick is a handsome young guy reminiscent of Marco Rossi.) Rod and Dean take this time alone to suck some cock, but Rick has no shampoo and walks in to catch the lovers in flagrante delicto. Is he taken aback? Is he shocked? No. He simply drops his towel and joins them. (This is the first indication we have that there will be no emotions displayed in this film.) Dean now alternates between sucking Rod and sucking Rick. Rick sucks on Rods rod for ten seconds; then Rod sucks on Ricks dick for five. Rick fucks Dean as Dean sucks Rod. Rod fucks Dean as Dean sucks Rick. All jack-off. Next we find Rick with two of his military buddies, Troy Walker and Lance Landers, at their motel room. They talk about chicks.
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Release date: 8/19/2001
Reviewed on: 5/18/2002
Studio: Pacific Sun
Starring: Ren Adams, Alex Wilcox, Chip Noll, Hans Ebson, Haven Phillips, Tony Ganz, Javier Fuerte
Directed by: Seth Black
Review brief: SATR8-A-HEAD is a pretty darn good film. The plot centers around the character of Ty (Nick Steel) who has become a famous Hollywood actor and decides to have a reunion of his high school buddies--none of whom know he is gay. Well, maybe except for Cade (Alex Wilcox) who once did it with our hero five years ago. Cade doesnt want to go to the reunion, but is driven there by urgings beyond his control. Ty has hired a Palm Springs clothing-optional resort for this reunion with pool, Jacuzzi, etc. so theres a lot of cavorting outdoors in the California sun. The other two schoolmates invited to this fete are Jason (Haven Phillips) who has joined the marines, and Hans Ebson (who must have been a German exchange student). Happily, Ty brings along a Hollywood friend with him, the adorable Chip Noll.
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Release date: 5/8/2002
Reviewed on: 5/14/2002
Studio: High Octane
Starring: Zack Berenc, Thierry Golyo
Review brief: Variations on a nursery rhyme: Ride a cockhorse And jerk off your dick While sitting impaled On another studs prick! That appears to be the modus operandi for this latest release from Herve Handsome and his stable of demi-gods. For each scene its: show the tools, suck on the big one, sit on it, and ride. Of course, after a while, the fucker decides he wants to control the action himself, moves the fuckee onto all fours or onto his back, and does his own riding. This may sound monotonous, but with these beauties it aint! Once again Herve Handsome has assembled an array of incredibly beautiful, masculine men who seem to enjoy man-to-man sex. (At least, they groan a lot.) The plot is something of a cliché but with these guys, who cares? Nicholas Babral, a young twenty-something breaks into a house and finds a book. He starts to read and the scenes unfold. First up, we have hunky Sim Cerna on a bed stroking his mammoth dick as one of Herves regulars, Albert Jarat crawls on. In scene two, Leo Dander gets double-fucked on a table by Achille Fanyar and Marcel Sarki.
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Release date: 1/15/2002
Reviewed on: 5/13/2002
Studio: U.S. Male
Starring: Eric Evans, Ryan Scott, Lark Larson, Brett Collins, Ryen Matthews, Eric Mann, Ryan Chandler
Directed by: Paul Barresi
Review brief: This is a very hot DVD! The actors are great to look at and they know how to suck and fuck, but the real triumph here is the cinematography. This cameraman knows just where to be and when; and just how long to hold to a shot before moving on to an even better one. HE'S GREAT! The first scene begins with Brett Collins and Ryen Matthews in boxing gloves sparing as Ryan Scott watches. Coach Ryan Chandler enters calls them pussies and drags Scott off for some bed work. (With all these Ryans in this film, no wonder Matthews opts for Ryen.) Left to themselves, Collins and Matthews stop sparing and start spearing. After each has sucked the other to full erection, they trundle down to the pool where Brett screws Ryan doggie style on a chaise longue. In scene two, the adorable Lark Larsen spies on Eric Evans doing roadwork and pushups. As Eric goes in to shower, Lark picks up the boxing gloves Eric has left behind. He not only returns them, he places himself on the bed for Eric to find when he returns from the shower. Eric is pleasantly surprised.
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Release date: 5/7/2002
Reviewed on: 5/7/2002
Studio: Marina Pacific
Review brief: Theres something about doing it in costume that makes even mediocre sex seem titillating. Seven minutes pass before there is any sex. (Oh, sure in the credits each member of the cast is introduced with the member of another member in his mouth, but that doesnt count.) This gives us time to admire the costumes and the effort that has gone into this period piece. This also, unfortunately, gives us a number of faux pas: One of the dudes dines with his plumed hat on indoors; another shakes hands with a servant. Now an aristocrat might fuck a servant (and often did) but he certainly would nOt shake hands with one as an equal. Finally, we see them drinking red wine with chicken! (Never in France!) At the conclusion of this incongruous meal, two of the party do the Lady & the Tramp spaghetti bit with a banana while the other two use a piece of chicken, but its not erotic. For that, director Hammerschmitt should have taken his cue from the film Tom Jones, but, hey, this is a cartoon, too. So, OK. Next, two aristos retire to a sitting room and do what the French do best.
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Release date: 11/26/2001
Reviewed on: 4/28/2002
Studio: Caballero
Starring: Andre Savage, Zachary Scott, Kurt Wagner, Brock Hensley, Brett DiMineo, Dante Foxx, Gabe Rivera, Michael Knight [II] (gay)
Directed by: Paul Barresi
Review brief: There are some pretty hot things going on in this backyard. We start with the cliché of a hunk cleaning the pool. Naturally, the young guy of the house comes out to bask in the sun and swim, spies the pool man, and were off. In this instance the pool man is Zachery Scotthe of the big schlongand the young guy is Brock Hensley, a blond twink who loves sex. While taking Scotts length with ease, the action is spied on by Dante Foxx and Kurt Wagner. These join in at the end, and then Brock and Zachery go indoors to do it. Now Dante and Kurt begin to make out. As Kurt is sucking Dante, Dante strokes Kurts cock with his foot. (If youre a foot fetishist, folks, youll love this. Its a very handsome foot.) Brock returns. (Either Zach had another pool to clean or Brock exhausted him.) Brock goes to work on both cocks, sometimes sucking both at the same time. Then he sits on Dantes, and boy does he ride it! He bounces harder than Paul Revere did when he rode off to warn the colonists. Kurt s not left out. Brock sucks him while riding and then Dante boffs him, too.
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Release date: 3/7/2002
Reviewed on: 4/26/2002
Studio: Bacchus
Starring: Dirk Adams, Scott Mann, Collin Jennings, Brandon James, Sergio Real
Review brief: This would be a really fun advertisement for a major underwear manufacturer. As the title suggests it all starts with white briefs. But it also manages in each scene to pair a hairy guy with a smooth guy that I found interesting. As none of the performers are identified and as the only performer I recognized was listed last and appeared last, I am assuming that the performers appeared in chronological order. If that is the case, then Brandon James (a young bear) gets a delivery from Collin Jennings. This scene provides us with the longest stretch of dialogue in the entire film. "How much do I owe you?" "$14.56." I only have $14." "I've never seen you in your underwear before." "Wanna suck my cock?" "Yeah!" Thankfully, the film doesn't use that twiddly music we've heard a million times before, we just hear "slurp" "ah" "umm". After Collin has brought Brent's cock to full stiffness, it's Brent's turn to make up for the 56 cents he owes so he returns the favor. Collin in contrast to bear cub Brent is totally smooth (Look, Ma, no pubic hair!) Something that turns me on (wonder why?).
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Release date: 2/1/2002
Reviewed on: 4/20/2002
Studio: LKP
Review brief: Ettore Tosi, Lucas Kazans incredibly handsome superstar, is our guide on this delightful journey that begins in Spain. We first find a handsome stud Edardo Souza lolling about in the rugged countryside where he jacks a moderate sized but very stiff cock. When we do not see him cum, I thought, Oh, shit! This is more money I have spent foolishly. But in the next scene, with the even more handsome Lucas Foz among a rocky outcrop spattering the stones with spurts of semen, I began to relax. Scene three where we are introduced to Tiziano Cortese is even better. Tiziano, with a smooth muscular build and a bizarre splotchy tattoo across his lower abdomen (that unfortunately somewhat mars his incredible beauty) tells Ettore that he has a girlfriend and strips in a bar. This heterosexuality does not prevent him, however, from permitting Ettore to suck on his huge uncut boner. (Who could prevent Ettore from doing anything?) Having arrived in Bologna, the home of Italys biggest sausages, Ettore spies Marco Merisi and Fabio deRossi who are seemingly lovers.
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