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Tongue in Groove's Movie Reviews (400 - page 4)

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Boxcover for Firebush 3
Firebush 3

Release date: 9/24/2005
Reviewed on: 2/2/2006

Studio: Platinum X Pictures

Starring: Alex Sanders, John Strong, Tony T., Kris Knight, Jordan Styles, Eve Laurence, Smokie Flame, Victoria Sweet, Tinka Rose
Directed by: Jewel De'Nyle

Review brief: Okay, everyone who likes abusive sex - choking, hair pulling, face slapping, throat gagging, spanking - stay in your seats and continue reading about Fire Bush #3. Everyone else, excused. This flick is filled with what I call Throttle Sex, where the guys simply demean the girls as much as possible. Hopefully, everyone involved is a good actor and that the abuse is only faked. But I wonder sometimes, as the girls dont always appear to be enjoying themselves. This aint your daddys porn. I you like seeing guys inflicting even implied pain to girls, you'll dig this flick. The girls, all brunettes, are (in order): Victoria Sweet; Eve Lawrence; Smokie Flame (the cute cover girl), who does anal; Jordan Styles, another who takes it up the pooper then does A2M; and Tinka Rose. All the girls take facials. The tough guys, if thats what you want to call them, are Alex Sanders, John Strong, Kris Knight, and Tony T., who gets to rough up two girls. The DVD extras include a 23-minute Behind the Scenes, Cumshot Recap, Photo Gallery, Trailers, and Website info.
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Boxcover for Butt Busters 2 (Lethal Hardcore)
Butt Busters 2 (Lethal Hardcore)

Release date: 8/12/2005
Reviewed on: 2/2/2006

Studio: Lethal Hardcore

Starring: Dave Hardman, Trevor [I] (ambiguous), Rick Masters, Bailey, Destiny, Julie Robbins, Andrew Andretti, Annie Cruz, Saana
Directed by: Stoney Curtis

Review brief: Butt Busters #2 could have been a much better flick. All they had to do was employ better looking girls and add more heat to the sex. None of the five female performers could be considered for the A List of Pornland. Its really a carnival of ink, as all the girls come adorned with tattoos galore. That fact could be overlooked if the sex went high on the Volcano Meter. But, alas, there is very little chemistry between the performers, most of whom appear to be mulling the upcoming NFL Draft instead of having enjoyable sex. The girls are, in order: Julie Robbins, whose tits and thighs look like a relief map of Colorado (cant the camera just pull back a little to make her decent?) and who uses way too much eye shadow; Annie Cruz, a Philipino seen in far too many recent flicks to be of interest; Bailey, a brunette with heavy eye shadow and a few too many inches around the midriff; Destiny, whose next job could be as the tattooed woman in the circus; and Saana, who at least smiles a lot and tries to give the appearance shes semi-interested in the fucking and sucking.
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Boxcover for Never Been Touched (Adam & Eve)
Never Been Touched (Adam & Eve)

Release date: 8/9/2005
Reviewed on: 1/31/2006

Studio: Adam & Eve

Starring: Suzy, Leslie Taylor, Lea de Mae, Vyona, Honey Winter, Nataly Brown, Jessica Day, Katy Red
Directed by: Anita Rinaldi

Review brief: Imagine, if you will, a porn flick with attractive women; good, hard sex without any rough stuff; an absence of slapping, choking, and spitting; and interesting interviews with the talent. Doesnt exist, you say? Well, I found one, and its called Never Been Touched. Okay, thats a hokey title. Not only have these girls definitely been touched, theyve done quite a bit of touching back, Id say. But, according to director Anita Rinaldi, all five girls are making their porn debut. This being a European production, all the girls use first names only. And there is certain amount of subtitling during the brief interviews before each scene. But once the action starts, the sex is solid and worth watching. The newbies include (in order): Honey, a Hungarian blonde; Natalia, a brunette from the Ukraine; Ili, a Hungarian brunette; Evi, also a brown-haired Hungarian; and Suzy, a blonde from Budapest. Natalia does the only anal and takes a facial, as does Ili. The rest of the scenes end with money shots south of the face. The girls are all attractive with nice to excellent bodies.
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Boxcover for XXX Teen Amateurs 5
XXX Teen Amateurs 5

Release date: 10/29/2005
Reviewed on: 1/31/2006

Studio: Score

Starring: Jordan, Morgan, Martina, Tori, Neeo, Bibi Fox, Cage, Michael V., Brooke Summer

Review brief: Teen XXX Amateurs #5 is the latest from the Score Group that continues to score high in my book. They employ a simple premise - get attractive new faces and let them suck and fuck without screwing up the whole thing with stupid dialogue or abusive sex. The girls are treated like human beings who simply enjoy sex, not crack whores who can be dominated and demeaned. The girls are attired like real teens - braids, pigtails, knee sox, and schoolgirl uniforms. Unfortunately, most keep on at least part of their outfits throughout the entire action. Id rather see them completely naked by the second position change, but that is a small complaint. The sex may not be volcano hot, but it sizzles in many cases. When the girls arent fake moaning, they appear to actually be enjoying themselves. The male talent (uncredited, another minor issue with me) doesnt try to steal the thunder; they generally behave themselves and just fuck the girls hard.
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Boxcover for Ass Pumpers 1 (Bad Seed)
Ass Pumpers 1 (Bad Seed)

Release date: 8/23/2005
Reviewed on: 1/31/2006

Studio: Bad Seed

Starring: Billy Glide, Rick Masters, Tommy Gunn, Nadia Nyce, Jassie, Lauren Phoenix, Melissa Lauren, Kody Coxxx, Nicki Hunter, Katja Kassin
Directed by: Brett Maverick

Review brief: Ass Pumpers suffers from what I call NDS, New Director Syndrome. Brett Maverick tries his hardest to ruin what could have been a decent flick by putting himself ahead of the talent. We do not watch porn to hear some kid repeating, Look at that! hundreds of times as he showcases (and fondles) the girls butts. Hey, Brett, weve seen butts before; show us some action. The talent tries hard to make up for the poor direction. But, in the end (so to speak), the lack of heat in the performers is evident and too difficult to overcome. Maverick insists on having the camera pointed in one position for way too long (usually at the dicks as they plunged into various orifices) and not showing the rest of the girls bodies or faces.
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Boxcover for Cumfixation 1
Cumfixation 1

Release date: 9/23/2005
Reviewed on: 1/13/2006

Studio: Eruption Films



Review brief: Cumfixation #1 is an all-oral flick that would have been much better had director Richard Moulton chosen to let the girls and their oral talents be the stars rather than talking incessantly throughout the action. Its difficult to concentrate on the blowjobs when the girls are interrupted by questions and comments. Although none of the girls give great deep throat, most know their way around a cock and give credible performances. There are 11 scenes, and most of the girls could be considered attractive. Of course, ugly women can still give good head. But its always nice for the eye candy to compliment the action. The girls are, in order: Dillon Lauren; Lisa Marie; Shauna Banks; Faith Grant; Sophia; Venus; Violet; Holly Day; Kinzie Kener and Cherry Lane (in a 2-on-1); Brittany Blue; and the always lovely Monika Sweetheart. During some of the scenes, the couples engage in a little 69, so its improper to call this strictly an All BJ feature.
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Boxcover for Top Porn Stars
Top Porn Stars

Release date: 10/26/2005
Reviewed on: 1/13/2006

Studio: Metro



Review brief: Top Porn Stars sounds like a compilation but is, in fact, a new feature directed by Bridget Kerkove. Bridget has brought together some of the better looking talent and put them through a rugged wringer. The result: hard sex between veteran performers that is believable and interesting. All five scenes are boy/girl ending in facials, and three of them involve anal action and A2M. The sex tends to get a little abusive, with slapping, spanking, throat gagging, etc. Melissa Lauren has traded her trademark platinum blonde hair for a brunette look. She and a guy (either Chris Mountain or Alec Knighttheres no iding of the guys) have a torrid romp in the opener. Melissa looks hot, and she takes it up the pooper. Katja Kean and Mark Wood are next. Again, theres lots of anal probing and A2M action, just as there is in the third scene featuring Lauren Phoenix and some guy. Monica Mayhem and her more-tattooed-by-the-minute body get abused by Brian Surewood in the fourth scene, but theres no butt fucking.
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Boxcover for Lady Lust 3 (Digital Sin)
Lady Lust 3 (Digital Sin)

Release date: 10/12/2005
Reviewed on: 1/13/2006

Studio: Digital Sin

Starring: Daria Glower, Anita Queen, Belicia, Jennifer Stone, Nika Blond, Evelyn Lory, Carrie Cruise, Keana Moire, Simella, Britney Lightspeed, Nikol W., Renata Tomankova
Directed by: Max Candy

Review brief: Lady Lust #3 is an all-girl lezfest featuring some nice eye candy and plenty of pussy licking and exploration. The girls all appear to be Euros, and most range from attractive to gorgeous. Toys are utilized in most scenes. At a little over 2 hours, the DVD can get a little repetitive and boring. But taken in small doses (like one scene at a time) it can be a delight to voyeurs who wonder what really goes on behind the closed doors of horny girls. Theres good camerawork and nice sets throughout, and soft couples music accompanies most of the action. No single scene stands out from the others, as the action has a tendency to be formulated. The girls, in order, are: Simella and Anita Queen; Evelyn Lory and Jana Mrazkova; Carrie Cruise (Viktorie) and Daria Glower; Nikol and Angelina; Jennifer Stone and Belicia; and Celine and Nika. The DVD extras include a Photo Gallery, Trailers, Web Trailers, Company Info, and a Bonus Scene, which is, oddly enough, a boy/girl tryst with Lucy Lee and Denis Marti from Fucking Beautiful #7.
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Boxcover for Tight Teen Slits (18Eighteen) (2005 Release)
Tight Teen Slits (18Eighteen) (2005 Release)

Release date: 12/5/2005
Reviewed on: 1/4/2006

Studio: 18Eighteen

Starring: Katy, Valerie, Nika Blond, Justine Ashley, Ashley Gracie

Review brief: Tight Teen Slits is the latest from the Score Group that features brand-new (as far as I can tell), fairly attractive girls and unnamed guys having relatively hot sex. I believe all the talent is Euro, as there is little, if any, dialogue. Plus the girls all moan the same way and stare incessantly at the camera - a Euro staple. The scenes are basically the same: short setup, girl sucks guy, guy eats girl, 3-4 position changes, no anal action, nice facial finish, 20 minutes of action. The girls are, in order: brunette Ashley (shes the only non-facial girl), who looks good in her pigtails and fucks a guy who never shuts up; Kaitlyn, who has short, curly (almost kinky) brown hair and a smile as wide as the Atlantic Ocean despite the fact shes fucking some bearded, fat, ugly dude (probably her real-life s/o) whos a mute compared to the guy in the opener; cute blonde Lacie; blonde Cassie; and cute brown-haired Valerie. No last names given. The sex is well-shot, although the camera tends to stay on one angle for way too long. The sets are nice and well-lit.
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Boxcover for Flash (Club Magazine)
Flash (Club Magazine)

Release date: 8/18/2005
Reviewed on: 1/4/2006

Studio: Club Magazine

Starring: Jerry, Brooke, Gina Lynn, Lee Stone, Travis Knight, Brittney Skye, Shy Love, Harmony Rose, Lexie Marie, Jay Huntington
Directed by: Lorenzo Santini

Review brief: Flash #1 is hi-tech porn, which is a good thing if youre a young hipster who hates your daddys smut. Its filled with tons of MTV-style photography, cuts, edits, and music. Thats a bad thing if youre old school like me, but Ill try to stay objective. Shy Love is mentioned first here, although her scene is last. I find her breathtakingly beautiful, even with her terrible boob job. This brunette has a smile that could melt an igloo at the North Pole. And she knows how to take a facial! As for the others, cover girl Gina Lynn, a bottle blonde with inserts and huge fake eyelashes, opens the proceedings with a decent fuckathon (25 minutes) and takes a facial. She also in Scene 3, an all-girl outing with Harmony (Rose) and Lexi Marie. Not a very interesting scene, despite the presence of some toys. Another peroxide blonde, Brittney Skye, cavorts with Travis Knight in the second vignette.
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Boxcover for Fuck'em Young (Damaged)
Fuck'em Young (Damaged)

Release date: 10/8/2005
Reviewed on: 1/4/2006

Studio: Damaged Productions

Starring: Brooke, Lyla Lei, Sydnee Capri, Brandi May, Romina, Angelina Rio
Directed by: Antonion Del Toro

Review brief: Fuck Em Young is a great idea. Too bad none of the girls is this Damaged production could be remotely considered young. Id guesstimate the youngest girl in the group is 23-24 years old. Not exactly what the title implies. The sex aint bad. Director Antonio del Toro does a pretty good job matching partners with similar chemistry. And he keeps the action fairly hot throughout. But the girls are strictly B-Listers, at best. Asian brunette Lyla Lei hasnt been eating too many salads recently, if you get my drift. But shes a screamer, yelling nasty expletives at her ebony partner throughout the opener. He takes him up the ass, does some A2M, and opens wide for a mouthful at the end. Brooke is a veteran with a horrible fairy tattoo on her tummy. She seems less than enthused, as evidenced by her Behind the Scenes bonus feature demeanor. Shed rather be at an IRS audit.
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Boxcover for Flawless 3 (Metro)
Flawless 3 (Metro)

Release date: 9/27/2005
Reviewed on: 12/27/2005

Studio: Metro

Starring: Asia Carrera, Randy Spears, Cheyenne Silver, Noname Jane, Tanya Danielle, Nina Ferrari, Tawny Roberts, Sydnee Steele, Zora Banx, AnnMarie Rios

Review brief: Flawless #3 should be renamed Very Flawed #3. The folks at Cal Vista/Metro really know how to screw up a compilation, and this is proof positive. Where to startokay, the box cover lists nine actresses, yet shouts out in bold letters 10 of the hottest girls in adult! I could overlook that error, but not the fact that six (count em) six of the girls dont appear on the disc. The one guy they list on the cast, Randy Spears, also does not appear in any of the eight scenes. In addition, most of the missing girls pictures appear on the box, which smacks of bait and switch to this non-lawyer. So, if you obtained this disc to see Tanya Roberts (the gorgeous cover girl), Sydnee Steele, Zora Bank (their spelling, not mine or yours), Violet Blue, Ann Marie, or Asia Carrera, you are flat out of luck. The box also proudly announces a sizzling Bonus Scene from the hot and sexy Xara Diaz. Of course, there is no bonus scene at all.
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Boxcover for I'm So Young
I'm So Young

Release date: 9/14/2005
Reviewed on: 12/17/2005

Studio: Acid Rain

Starring: Tina Fine, Vanessa Michaels, Karina Kay, Bailey Brooks, Stacy Thorn, Claire Robbins, Mayh Monroe
Directed by: Bobby Damone

Review brief: Im So Young is an enticing title, and the cover girl (Karina Kay) is dressed like a parochial school girl. But a couple of the girls havent been called young in several years and the imagery is kind of ruined. Not that the sex isnt hard and driving and the girls arent capable performers. They just arent in that young category any more. And although none of them are ugly (a few could shave a bit closer to lose the pussy stubble), a couple would be considered attractive at best. Two brunettes, Myah Monroe and Claire, double-team Benjamin Bratt in the opener. Theres some good action here, if one ignores Benjamins bratty behavior. For one thing, he never shuts up, spewing insults and instructions throughout. The abuse continues with slapping, choking, gaping, A2M, anal action, and facials for both girls. Brunette Karina Kay and Alex Sanders romp in the second scene.
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Boxcover for Up Euro Ass
Up Euro Ass

Release date: 9/8/2005
Reviewed on: 12/17/2005

Studio: NJ Films



Review brief: Up Euro Ass is a gape-lovers wet dream. Not being a big fan of gaping, Ill try to maintain objectivity here, but it is difficult. I just dont see the stroke factor in having a guy fuck a girls ass, stop every 10 strokes, and have the camera look down into her colon. Okay, maybe once per scene, I can handle it. But to do it repeatedly, 7-8 times, over the course of the scene gets boring and unoriginal. This isnt sex; its a college Human Anatomy film. Take away the gaping and you have a pretty solid fuck film here. The girls range from attractive to very cute. Every scene ends in a facial. The girls are, in order: blond Julie Silver; brunette Alexa May; fair-haired Sarah; Jessica (sporting short reddish hair); and blond Kathy (billed as Katy) Anderson.
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Boxcover for Seducing Naked Young Girls
Seducing Naked Young Girls

Release date: 8/23/2005
Reviewed on: 12/17/2005

Studio: Simon Wolf

Starring: Randy Spears, Jasmin, Christie, Frank Gun, Dale Dabone, Lee Stone, Joey Ray, Becca Bratt, Barrett Blade, Andrea Moranty, Avena Lee, Tristan Seagal, Amber Rain, Jamie Brooks, Jack Spade, Lee Ann, Naudia Rio, Heather Hunt

Review brief: Seducing Young Naked Girls is a Simon Wolf compilation featuring some very good performers and lots of solid sex. The 10 scenes (including one labeled as a Bonus Scene), are snipped from various originals of the Wet Teens, Young Pink, and other such series. A cynic might infer that Simon Wolf/Pure Play is trying not to pass these things off as comps, based on the box cover come-ons.
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Boxcover for Catherine
Catherine

Release date: 9/12/2005
Reviewed on: 12/17/2005

Studio: Ninn Worx

Starring: Mike Foster, Bruno SX, Valentina Velasquez, Audrey Hollander, Victoria Swinger, Otto Bauer, Adriana Rouso, Nikky Blond
Directed by: Michael Ninn

Review brief: Catherine is a very high-budget Pure Play feature from director Michael Ninn. Combine high budget with Michael Ninn and you know what youll get - a ton of special affects, MTV-style editing, and very weird, surreal sex. You get five sex scenes in 120 minutes here, which means there is a ton of filler between the sucking and fucking. And most of it, to be honest, is hard to follow. The storyline/plot is overshadowed by the special effects, with lots of black and white cuts, slo-mo, heavily made-up girls, constant editing cuts, etc. I dont enjoy this type of flick. So Ill perform my duties as a reviewer by saying the stars are Audrey Hollander (who wears clown-like white makeup on her face), Valentina Velasquez, Nikki Blond (lesbian scene only), Adrianna Rouso (lesbian only), and Victoria Swinger. The usual Euro studs fill out the cast. Audrey does anal, A2M, DP, licks some pussy, and takes a couple facials. Valentina gets anal action, A2M, and a facial. Victoria gets a face blast. Im not sure who enjoys this stuff.
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Boxcover for XXX Teen Amateurs 2
XXX Teen Amateurs 2

Release date: 3/2/2005
Reviewed on: 12/17/2005

Studio: Score

Starring: Mia, Victoria, Monica Cameron, Anita Black, Majella

Review brief: Teen XXX Amateurs #2 is the second installment of this Euro series Ive reviewed, and I still cant find too much bad to say about it. This is a solid series filled with new, fresh, attractive girls and pretty good sex. OK, heres a negative: They dont identify the guys, most of whom are young and attractive (no, Im no gay) with nary a tat on their bodies. Now thats a fresh look! And the girls all go by just their first names, making it nearly impossible to determine if this is really their debut. Those are small problems compared to the wall-to-wall sex on this disc. There is a very short set-up to the action in each scene, then the sucking and fucking begin. There is no anal sex, and four of the five girls take facials. The sets are well-lit bedrooms and living room couches. The camera person is steady.
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Boxcover for Teen Factor
Teen Factor

Release date: 7/30/2005
Reviewed on: 12/8/2005

Studio: Damaged Productions

Starring: Anastasia, Claudia Clair, Lisa Lee, Salma de Nora, Dragana Presley, Bibian Norai

Review brief: Teen Factor is another throw-away from Damaged Productions in Europe. Why do they even bother packaging this trash? Maybe it sells over there, but I doubt it will ever catch on in the U.S., where viewers tend to be very selective and expect a good product for their dollars. Where to startokay, only one of the six girls is even remotely close to being a teenager. The star (and I use that term loosely) is Bibian Norai, a blonde who might be old enough to have teens of her own. I cant tell you which girl is the youngest because, like most of Damageds products, there is no (zero, nada) attempt at identifying the performers. No director is credited, although I cant blame the person responsible for this mess for seeking anonymity. As usual with cheap Euro junk (as opposed to the classy films of companies like Private), the voice-overs are in pretty good English, but the dubbing of the performers voices reminds one of a typical conversation at Ellis Island. To their credit, the girls (whoever they are) avoid perpetually staring at the camera, another Euro tradition I hate.
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Boxcover for Anal Bandits (Loaded Digital)
Anal Bandits (Loaded Digital)

Release date: 10/19/2005
Reviewed on: 12/7/2005

Studio: Loaded Digital

Starring: Catalina, Aurora Snow, Nikita Denise, Taylor Rain, Alaura Eden, Sophia Gently

Review brief: Anal Bandits is a 2004 compilation from Metro featuring some good looking performers and some very good anal sex. The scenes are snipped from a variety of originals (all gonzo type). Since most of these have been reviewed elsewhere on the Net, heres the scene breakdown (including the original feature): A cute (an unidentified) blonde and Mario - (unknown) Nikita Denise and Alex Sanders - Backseat Driver #17 Aurora Snow and Jay Ashley - Anal Excursions Taylor Rain and Mark Wood - Sodomize This #2 Catalina with Alex Sanders and another guy - Sorority Sex Sophia and Roxy Jezel with Lee Stone - Stone Cold Gauge and Mark Wood - Stop My Ass Is On Fire #10 Alaura Eden and Mark Wood - Stop My Ass Is On Fire #10 Sophie Evans and Mark Wood - Stop My Ass Is On Fire #9 Note to Metro on future compilations: Please identify the performers better, as well as the original features. If it wasnt for the trusty iafd.com, I wouldnt be able to id some of these scenes. And Id really like to know who the first girl was. Its an outdoor scene around a backyard swimming pool.
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Boxcover for Face Blasters (Elegant Angel)
Face Blasters (Elegant Angel)

Release date: 8/12/2005
Reviewed on: 12/7/2005

Studio: Elegant Angel

Starring: Gina, Brandon Iron, Kat, Trent, D. Wise, Brad Baldwin, Andrew Andretti, Tone Capone, Delilah Strong, Marcos Leon, Lefty Larue, Hillary Scott, Courtney Cummz, Joe Rock, Alicia Alighatti, Johnny Fender, Jim Beem, Haley Scott, Carmen Sancha, Ace, Tiffany Rayne, Jenny Hendrix
Directed by: Juan Cuba

Review brief: Face Blasters #1 is an all oral flick that combines some decent girls with some not-so-decent face fucking and sticky mug finishes. It will appeal to those who enjoy watching hard skull fucking and faces left streaked with runny mascara and man juice. There are some multiple-dick sucking scenes (Delilah Strong takes on four cocks), and one double-header scene (Haley Scott and Kat on one guy). There is a short setup to each vignette, some of which are tedious and inane. But once the cocksucking starts, the action is hot and heavy. All the girls seem into their knob polishing and dont seem to mind the semi-abusive crap. The girls, in order, are: Courtney Cummz, Carmen Sansha, Alicia Alighotti, Strong, Gina, Tiffany Rayne, Hillary Scott, Jenny Hendrix, and the Haley Scott/Kat duo. While none are beautiful, most are at least cute and none are unattractive.
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Boxcover for Dani Woodward & Friends
Dani Woodward & Friends

Release date: 9/18/2005
Reviewed on: 12/7/2005

Studio: New Machine

Starring: Monti, Chandler, Rayveness, Allison Kilgore, Barbie Bell, Dru Berrymore, Maya Gold, Dani Woodward

Review brief: Dani Woodward and Friends is another New Machine compilation that pleased me more than most of their releases. Which is to say, I enjoyed more than just the main scene featuring the star performer. Seems New Machine is now packaging some old Puritan stuff together in these Greatest Hits comps. Thats a nice break from having to watch nothing but recycled Ed Powers and Randy West junk.
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Boxcover for Teen Sensations 12
Teen Sensations 12

Release date: 10/12/2005
Reviewed on: 12/7/2005

Studio: DVSX

Starring: Chris Cannon, Tiger, Cheyne Collins, Sunshine, Van Damage, Reno, Nick Manning, Kinzie Kenner, Marcos Leon, Buster Good, Haley Scott, Jersey Jaxin, Laveah
Directed by: Alex Ladd

Review brief: The girls in Teen Sensations #12 may not be the best looking in the porn industry, but youve got to give them credit for trying.
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Boxcover for Wild on Sex 3
Wild on Sex 3

Release date: 10/11/2004
Reviewed on: 12/2/2005

Studio: Platinum X Pictures

Starring: Angelina, Pamela, Kimberly Franklin, Lanny Barbie, Jenny Ryder, Mandy Allison, Jamie James, Leanna Bacci
Directed by: Jewel De'Nyle

Review brief: Wild on Sex #3 is a marginal lesbian flick featuring Jewel DeNyle as the hostess and a lineup of average looking girls as the lesbos. To be upfront and honest, Im not a huge fan of all-girl movies. But Id be willing to bet a months supply of lube that not too many real-life lesbians would find the action here either believable or sexy. Jewel introduces the girls before each segment, and shes in Montreal scouting for talent. We know, because Jewel calls the location the beautiful Montreal on several occasions. The girls here are loaded with tattoos and piercings. None would be considered an A-Lister. Theres lots of fake moaning throughout. And most of the girls engage in a practice Ive heard is actually taboo among true lesbians, sucking on dildos like they are cocks. Lesbians stay away from men for many reasons, and not having to suck dick is one of them. Theres also a tryst in a bathroom which looks most contrived and the action looks uncomfortable to the girls.
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Boxcover for Shane TV 1: Summer Luvin'
Shane TV 1: Summer Luvin'

Release date: 9/14/2004
Reviewed on: 11/16/2005

Studio: Phoenix



Review brief: Reality Porn #1: Summer Luvin is Shane TVs almost all-girl outdoor pool romp. Aside from a brief blowjob sequence with Holly Hollywood and an unidentified non-pro surfer dude, the rest is a nearly 3-hour lezfest. Basically Shane (in a non-sex role) invites a bevy of her favorite beauties over for a pool party and lets them go at it in and around the pool. Holly, Alana Evans and Heather Hunt are the first threesome to square off. Theres lots of giggling and laughing and talking among the trio, which kind of removes any potential heat they might generate as they lick and stick each other with tongues, fingers, and toys. They look like theyre having fun, but not one of them ever approaches a climax. Redhead Katja Kassin and brunette Ramona Luv are next. These two seem to be more into the action and each other and actually look like they might be having orgasms. A strap-on dildo makes an appearance in this scene. The above mentioned BJ comes next, as does the guy, who gets his dick sucked in the back seat of an SUV at the beach.
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Boxcover for Eternity
Eternity

Release date: 10/6/2005
Reviewed on: 11/13/2005

Studio: Wicked

Starring: Chris Cannon, Randy Spears, Eric Masterson, jessica drake, Shay Sights, Kris Knight, Michelle Lay, Talon, Eva Angelina, Keri Sable, Lauren Kain, Stormy Daniels
Directed by: Brad Armstrong

Review brief: Eternity is one of the more ambitious porn flicks you may ever see. Wicked spared very little expense in making this epic period piece. This flick is definitely couples material, assuming the couple has 2 ½ hours to kill. Personally, Ive never seen porn with this much storyline, so many cast members (tons of extras), tremendous costumes (most of it is set in Victorian times), a dancing horse (no kidding), a pistol duel, a sword fight, and the torching of a house. Stormy Daniels is the star, and she opens the story on her wedding day. As she makes the final adjustments on her gown, her mother, Veronica Hart, gives her a locket and starts telling the tale of the generations-old necklace and what it symbolizes. Back we go in time towell, Im not going to give you all the plotlines. Suffice to say Stormy plays her great-grandmother (a peasant) during the flashback. Randy Spears is the evil land baron shes forced to marry. I have no doubt Spears could have made it as an actor in legitimate Hollywood films had he not chosen the jizz biz. The entire cast is attractive.
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