Diville's New Machine Movie Reviews (8)
Release date: 7/10/2002
Reviewed on: 10/22/2002
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Ed Powers, Jay, Jessie, Gabby, Shuki
Directed by: Ed Powers
Review brief: Directed By: Ed Powers I think Ed Powers is the kind of guy who likes it when people talk about him. He likes it when people say his name, or marvel at his success. And one day, after he's grown just a little older, he will die comfortably in his own arms. But will anyone care very much? True infamy is a long way off when you're a pornographer. When it's all said an done with, Ed Powers will be remembered more for being a lucky man than having been an admirable one. In no way is any of this meant to disparage his success. Anyone who cares to do a little research will find that this self-proclaimed porn critic wrote once in another review that he kinda liked the little fella. Yes, when compared to "extreme" gonzo home movie makers, I do like the guy. By pornography standards he seems harmless enough. But after 15 years, or so, of Dirty Debutantes videos, do we really need him? Sadly, the answer is no. More Dirty Debutantes 130 is a paint by numbers affair. Ed does just enough to meet the definition of pornography.
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Release date: 2/10/2001
Reviewed on: 7/12/2001
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Channone, Kaitlyn Ashley, Dave Hardman, Mike Horner, Montana Gunn, Crystal Gold
Directed by: Stuart Canterbury
Review brief: Starring: Kaitlyn Ashley, Channone, Crystal Gold, Montana Gunn, Ashley Renee, Lovette, Alex Sanders, Kyle Stone, Mike Horner, Dave Hardman, Frank Towers Directed By: Stuart Canterbury Topless Window Washers is not a good movie. It's unnecessary, in fact. It's unnecessary in the way an oversized advertising circular stuffed in my mailbox is unnecessary. Both pretend to have my best interest in mind, but each takes my wallet to heart. There's nothing here we all haven't seen done better some place else, and even though a couple of the girls on this DVD are more than nice to look at, they're not presented as they should be. I'll go on record and say I'm a fan of Chonnone, the French starlet who came and went like so many other second tier porn actresses. I'm convinced if she spoke English she'd have been a bigger star. Her body is really quite impressive, especially the ass part of it. It's that body which graces the this movie's box cover, and while she may not be recognizable to some, she is to me.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 1/18/2001
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Randy West, Jamie, Miajah, Charlene Aspen, Delilah Paige, Amy Atakani, Ronnie Cox, Amythiest
Directed by: Randy West
Review brief: Starring: Charlene Aspen, Delilah Paige, Miajah, Amyteist, Amy Atakani, Jamie, Ronnie Cox, Randy West Directed By: Randy West Number 67 is either the volume number on this edition of Up & Cummers, or it's series creator Randy West's age. OK, that's not really fair; the man is not that ancient, but you almost feel compelled to make an age crack anytime his name is invoked. In fact, West has been around the business so long that he's picked up some valuable lessons about how good pornography is made. This edition of his signature series, however, would do nothing to support the claim. After watching several volumes of Up & Cummers I'm starting to believe West feels compelled to put out a new release whether he's got the footage to merit it or not.
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Release date: 6/7/2000
Reviewed on: 11/28/2000
Studio: New Machine
Starring: John Decker, Randy West, Vince Vouyer, Tatiana, Angelina, Nadia Moore, Charlie Macc
Directed by: Randy West
Review brief: You never know what to expect from Randy West and his Up & Cummers series. Of course, you can count on pre-sex interviews and pro/am production values, but so much depends on the quality of the girls he features. Just look at the ones he puts on his covers; if you think you'd like to see them having sex, then you won't be too disappointed. It's not too hard to divine that if the girls look good, then they'll look good fucking. It's all straight forward business, really. This time around, with Volume 33, West gives us Tatianna and Nadia Moore, both of whom could have been major league adult stars had they chosen to stick around the business longer. Though they are the only high points on the disc, their participation, alone, is enough to recommend the DVD. The main attractions must wait, however, as Randy introduces us first to Angelina, a Southern Florida housewife. I'm not saying that Angelina is a turn off, but fantasizing about housewives has never really been the most popular of male pastimes.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 10/31/2000
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Stacy Valentine, Bridgette, Mahogany, Alexia, Shane Tyler
Directed by: Randy West
Review brief: Starring: Stacy Valentine, Shane Tyler, Alexia, Mahogany, Bridgette Belle, Randy West, Vince Voyeur, Alex Sanders, DJX Directed By: Randy West Stacy Valentine is really a special piece of work. All those curves. All that enthusiasm. All that sweat. Really, it's as if she's been genetically engineered to fuck for our entertainment. I'm sure she's also a very nice girl, and I suspect she'd be fun to talk to about things other than sex, but until she pays me a visit to engage in polite dinner conversation, I'm going to think of her in sexual terms. Besides, how fun is it to fantasize about conversation? Up & Cummers 31 is all about Stacy Valentine. There are three other scenes on the disc, but they're really irrelevant. Stacy is the star of the show. Randy West was lucky enough to get Stacy for his long running pro-am series before she hit the porn big time, as he has been fortunate to do with other starlets. After all, that is the purpose of his line.
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Release date: 8/7/2000
Reviewed on: 10/29/2000
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Ed Powers, Faceless Fan, Jake Steed, Anita, Ursula, Leila, Jennifer, Szilvia, Kat, Michelle St. Clair
Directed by: Ed Powers
Review brief: Starring: Michelle (Veronica), Ursula, Leila, Jennifer, Nicoletta, Sylvia, Kat, Ed Powers, Jake Steed, Faceless Fan Director: Ed Powers One of the side effects of being an adult performer is that you open yourself up to a very unique and strange kind of criticism. Where most entertainers are evaluated on their ability to act, sing, or dance, those who perform in adult movies are always judged by the way they look, have sex, and by how much they're willing to do on screen. Girls are often discounted for not doing the things we would never ask of our wives in personal life, and men are vilified if the volume of their ejaculations aren't up to acceptable levels. And then, there's Ed Powers, who is criticized for his age, the way he looks, the size of his penis, the paleness of his skin, and the awkwardness of his rap with women. Yet, I like the little fella. His Dirty Debutantes series is one of the most successful series ever, and it's been copied many times over. The formula is simple, though.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 10/15/2000
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Charlie, Raylene, Jennae Dess, Randy West, Leah Stevenson
Directed by: Randy West
Review brief: Starring: Raylene, Charlie, Amy Akatani, Jennae Dess, Leah Stevenson, Randy West, Roy Ramirez Directed By: Randy West Randy West's Up & Cummers series, if your unfamiliar with it, is a polished up version of Ed Powers' Dirty Debutantes. Powers features girls who have never appeared on screen before, and Randy follows the same format, only he often uses more established performers. Also, it's worth noting that neither one has been carded for alcohol in a long, long, long time. West, in particular, is old enough to be my dad, and I'm old enough that it no longer bothers me to be called "sir" or "mister!" His decades in porn has brought him some experience, though, and it's all on display in Up & Cummers 51. Normally, I cringe at the idea of watching Randy West yet one more time, but the women in this addition of his long running series are so over the top attractive you hardly care he's involved. As a pro-am production, expect some pro-am production values.
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Release date: 8/25/2000
Reviewed on: 9/12/2000
Studio: New Machine
Starring: Allysin Chaynes, Randy West, Mary Jane, Vanessa, Julian St. Jox, Bunny Luv, Amy Atakani, Amythiest
Directed by: Randy West
Review brief: Starring: Bunny Luv, Jessica Darlin, Allysin Chaynes, Vanessa, Mary Jane, Amythiest, Amy Atakani, Randy West, Julian St. Jox, D.J.X. Directed By: Randy West Up & Cummers, as a series, is pretty much a mixed bag and volume 68 serves as a good example of what it does well and what it doesn't do so well. I've always liked the "first time on camera" conceit of pro-am features. At the very least, they save us from typical scripted porn posturing and show us something we haven't seen before. That's pretty much the foundation Randy West's long running series was built on. This is presented well with a relatively clear picture and very sharp sound. But there's a downside to all this. Honest and sincere fucking doesn't always translate into good fucking. Let me explain. Volume 68 is broken into four segments. Of the four, only two are worth the price of admission. The first segment, for instance, is easily the best.
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