joeblow69's Movie Reviews (136 - page 6)
Release date: 8/2/2000
Reviewed on: 11/14/2000
Studio: Metro
Starring: Tim Lowe, Eric Price, Alex Stone, Scott Hogan, Beau Humphrey, Adrian Jackson, Michael Brawn, Jake Seever, Jesse Koeler, David Rockmore, Tony Young, Kip Astor, Scott Avery, Andew Bishow, Michael Carpenter, Paul Coder, Blake McDonald, Drew McGinnis, Rich Parsons
Review brief: Ah, the compilation video. It sure brings back memories. I remember the first gay video I ever bought was a vivid compilation. I remember feeling so lucky when I stumbled upon it. I thought to my self, Wow! 4 whole hours of gay porn for only $20! Why would anyone pay upwards of $50 bucks for a regular video when you could get 4 whole hours for only $20 bucks!? Of course now I know why it was so cheap it was utter crap. The whole concept of the compilation video is a scam to fool the uniformed viewer. Take a bunch of worthless scenes from older videos (that are no longer selling), and repackage them and try to pass it off as new. It was only a matter of time before someone started marketing compilation DVDs. So, with our expectations sufficiently lowered, lets take a look at Something Wild 2. For starters, there are no special features. No cumshot compilations, screenshot galleries, zip. When you get to the menu, you only get one option: Play movie.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 11/11/2000
Studio: Men of Odyssey
Starring: Ryan Idol, J.T. Sloan, Joshua Sterling, Bo Summers, Jordan Young
Directed by: Taylor Hudson
Review brief: Ryan Idol right up there with Ken Ryker and Jeff Stryker, he is one of the big three gay porn stars. You either love him or you hate him. Idol in the Sky was his last movie, which promised to be the biggest, baddest, most expensive porno to date. Ryan got paid a whopping $25,000 for this film, and stars in 4 out of the 6 scenes. Enough of the history lesson, hows the movie? Idol in the Sky has Ryan as a bad-ass fighter pilot whose job it is to train in the new rookies. First up, Ryan is giving a slide show to Aaron Austin, Kyle McKenna, and Adam Wilde. Things turn frisky, and Ryan ends up dropping his shorts for the cadets, who all get their turn sucking him off. Ryan shoots his load on Kyles face (right across his eye!) then leaves. The guys keep the heat going, though, as Kyle works his tongue into both Adam and Aarons cracks. Evidently, the Air Force frowns on body hair, as these boys butts are smooth as silk.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 11/9/2000
Studio: Oh Man
Starring: Peter Wilder, Chance Caldwell, Max Grand, Kurt Stefano, Steve O'Donnell, Bryan Kidd, Sam Crockett
Review brief: On the cover of The Flavor of Mens DVD is an extreme close up of Sam Crocketts six pack, with the tempting question, Wanna Taste? If only I could! The movie starts out with Steve ODonnell taking a shower after a short workout. Delivery boy Bryan Kidd stops by and quickly strips down and joins him. There is nothing quite like the sight of two guys making out in the shower. I dont know why we dont see this more often. Anyway, after getting each other squeaky clean in the shower, they retire up to Steves room for some more intense action. Just as Steve is planting his face in Bryans ass, Sam Crockett interrupts them. Sam is looking for his friend Kurt Stefano. Sam isnt about to walk away from these two, though, and joins them for some hot 3way oral action. Suddenly, Sam decides he wants to save his cum for Kurt, and takes off, leaving Bryan and Steve alone to finish things up.
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Release date: 7/10/2000
Reviewed on: 11/4/2000
Studio: Dolphin
Starring: Andrew, Roman, Artem, Ilia, Yuris, Artems, Yanis, Edmond, Temas, Konstantin
Directed by: Alex Clark
Review brief: Anyone who has watched a lot of porn, knows what is it like when you accidentally pick up a movie that really rubs you the wrong way. You know what I mean the kind that makes you want to swear off porn forever? This, my friends, is exactly that movie. An hour and 40 minutes of the most god-awful porn I have ever seen. First off, the boys in this flick are just down right unattractive. I believe most of them are from Russia. They seem to range from age 18 to 20, but are all, for the most part, boney, scrawny, pimply, and in desperate need of a tan. There is 1 cute guy that I found in this movie, and Dolphin International was wise enough to put him on the cover of the DVD. The first scene is a mess. One of the stars of this scene has some small red bumps on his lips that look kind of like herpes. There is no way I would let this boy near my cock! As with the entire film, the sex is very generic.
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Release date: 5/17/2000
Reviewed on: 11/1/2000
Studio: Studio 2000
Starring: Thomas Lloyd, Nick Savage, Chris Steele, Michael Brandon, Geoff Ashton, Ales Hanak, Steve Harper, Jan Novak, Pavel Novotny
Review brief: [ /image ] --> [ /image ] --> [ /image ] --> [ /image ] --> [ /image ] --> Now is the time, brothers and sisters, to bow down to the deity of your choice, and thank him/her for the glory that is the Czech Republic. There are only two Czech men in this flick, but man oh man, are they GORGEOUS! Ales Hanak and Pavel Novotny are truly works of art. They both have bulging pecs, huge cocks, bronze tans, and best of all, dont speak a word of English. The two Czechs are visiting Chris Steeles military base to get some hands on experience in how the US military is run. Chris knows a good thing when he sees it, and arranges for some alone time with Pavel. He quickly gets Pavel undressed and on his back so he can ram his tongue right up the Czechs crack. The two then trade blow jobs before Chris throws Pavels legs up in the air for a good old-fashion ass ramming. Chris is a little more tender with Pavel than I would have been, but maybe Pavel isnt used to getting fucked, and needed special attention.
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Release date: 6/18/2000
Reviewed on: 10/30/2000
Studio: Studio 2000
Starring: Dave Nelson, Mark Slade, Brad King, Tommy Lord, Ben Damon, Jens Hammer, Rob Lance, George Bastien
Directed by: Derek Kent
Review brief: Cuffed! is the first DVD release of Mark Slade, who recently made the switch to gay porn from straight, where he was known as Frank Towers. Apparently, he starred in over 200 straight movies before he realized that he could make a ton more money in gay porn. Oh well, their loss is our gain! Mark has a great body, not to mention a very thick cock and some big hairy balls. The question is, will he be able to turn up the heat with another man? Cuffed! starts out with a very nice extreme close- up of Rob Lance drooling all over Marks cock. Unfortunately, Mark doesnt reciprocate much in this scene. As soon as Rob finishes his spit- shine job, Mark bends him over and starts plowing away. This is probably the weakest scene, as Mark doesnt seem to into the sex here. I think that he prefers his meat a little younger, as we will see in scene 5. Just as the two have finished getting dressed, Robs son Tommy Lord comes home.
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Release date: 9/6/2000
Reviewed on: 10/30/2000
Studio: P.M. Productions
Starring: Jack Wrangler, Kurt Williams, Al Parker, Roger, Steve Tracy, Chris Adams, Jennifer Cashoty, Christopher Christy, Tim Christy, Adam Neumar, David Warfield
Directed by: Tom DeSimone
Review brief: Ah, the 70s. The pre-Golden age of porn. Back when mustaches were mandatory and the films were grainier than my ass crack after a trip to the beach. Caballero digs WAY back into the vaults and re-releases Heavy Equipment on DVD. Was it worth the effort? Uh, hmm, err it depends. First things first, the picture quality is awful. I mean really, really bad. The video is very grainy, and the lighting is extremely dark in a few places. It isnt mentioned anywhere on the DVD, but I could swear that this was filmed in 3D. There are many places where you can see the standard red-blue double image required for 3D. This seems to happen most frequently when projectiles are coming straight at the screen. Penises, hands, dumbells, things like that. I dont have 3D glasses, though, so I cant confirm anything. If this wasnt done intentionally, then the picture quality is even worse that I thought. Our story (thats right, there is a story here!) starts out with our hero, the geeky Chester, working at an adult bookstore.
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Release date: 6/18/2000
Reviewed on: 10/22/2000
Studio: Titan Media
Starring: Anthony Gallo, Josh Perez, Trenton Comeaux, York Powers, Eduardo, Jason Branch, Nick Cannon, Paul Dawson, Joe Serrano
Directed by: Bruce Cam
Review brief: Its nice to know there are some studios you can always count on for quality porn. I have yet to be disappointed by a Titan DVD, and this one is no exception. Following in the Titan tradition, there are no twinkie boys here. Titan has jam- packed this DVD with older, maturer guys, who, for the most part, are REALLY into their scenes. There are no young gay-for-pay studs who look like they would rather be having a root canal than being fucked here. The Coachs Instruction York Powers (the coach) is teaching Anthony Gallo, Nick Cannon and Trenton Comeaux some new wrestling moves. After a little bit of rolling around on the mat, they strip down and get right to the main event: fucking the hell out of Trenton. Anthony and York takes turns on top, while Nick just stands at the sidelines and watches (apparently Nick must have been having some major wood problems, as he doesnt do much in this scene at all). Anthony looks like he has eaten 1 to many HO-HOs, but he makes up for it with his passion for his work.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 10/17/2000
Studio: Studio 2000
Starring: Gianfranco, Adam Wilde, Sonny Markham, Johnny Hanson, Carl Erik, Nic Collins, Buck Phillips
Directed by: John Travis
Review brief: I was looking forward to this one for a long time. I had seen some pics on the internet of Sonny Markham fucking Gianfranco, and immediately put this on my "must buy" list. Unfortunately, I was a little disappointed. The movie starts out with Sonny Markham's boyfriend, Buck Phillips, leaving town for the weekend. Buck reminds Sonny that a bunch of people will be stopping by to do some photo shoots, and tells him to keep his dick in his pants. Good luck... Scene 1 has Johnny Hanson modeling underwear next to a convertible. Adam Wilde is helping out on the set, and the two decide to get busy during a break. This is the fist time I have seen Johnny in action, and all I can say, is WOW! Johnny has a HUGE head on his very thick cock. Very red, and very engorged. Had Johnny been paired up with an attractive partner, this scene could have been a scorcher (sorry Adam!) The scene is pretty good, though, and Johnny does cum twice. In the next scene, Sonny gets roped into being a replacement for a missing model.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 10/16/2000
Studio: Titan Media
Starring: York Powers, Sean Rider, Max Holden, Cliff Parker, Rusty Samuels, Tom Turrell
Review brief: River Patrol starts out with Chris Parker canoeing down the river, looking for trespassers. He gets a little bored, and decides to take some time out for a some good ol' fashion masterbation. This is not one of your better ideas, especially when your boss is the very butch and very strict York Powers. York catches Chris beating his salami on the job and decides to teach him a lesson. He throws Chris down on the ground and holds him there with his foot. He then proceeds to piss all over Chris's chest! This gets Chris so turned on, he lets go a turrent of piss himself! (I usually don't approve of watersports, but Chris was very naughty, and he deserved it!) York then pushes Chris around like a three dollar whore before forcing Chris to suck his dick. York slaps Chris upside the head many times with his engorged cock before cuming all over Chris's chest. Damn! The two then head back to headquarters, so York can continue to teach Chris a lesson. They go at it outdoors in a really cool outdoor shower.
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Release date: 9/14/2000
Reviewed on: 10/16/2000
Studio: High Octane
Starring: Frank Gun, Atilla Acs, Robert Antoni, Zoltan Beni, Tibor Chalupa, Tibor Cseh-Szakal, Karoly Feher, Gyorgy Furst, Krisztian Gyuleszi, Attila Hogyes, Tamas Novak, Robert Pagoni, Gyorgy Schiff, Balazs Szabo, Istvan Szekelyi, Akos Takacs, Peter Zoltan, Nicholas Kiss
Directed by: Herve Handsome
Review brief: [ /image ] --> [ /image ] --> [ /image ] --> [ /image ] --> [ /image ] --> MMMM... euro men! Sportsmen starts out with a blond built-like-a-truck-sex-god getting a blowjob in a locker room. What a hottie! Unfortunately, he just gets blown and then leaves. I would have loved to see some anal action here, but oh well, we get plenty of that in the rest of the movie. In the second scene the blower from scene 1 gets joined by 3 more hunky rugby players. Didn't do a lot for me, but the guys certainly are attractive enough. They do the standard suck/fuck in a few different positions, then end with 3 taking turns fucking the 4th. Scene 3 takes place in the same locker room. A very ruggedly built romainian is a photographer doing a shoot of 5 rugby players. The photo shoot quickly turns erotic, and we end up with a nice 6-way. Actually, it is really 3 2-ways, as the guys pick a partner, and stick to him.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 10/12/2000
Studio: Oh Man
Starring: Vince Bandero, Malleek, Sky Thompson, Blake Harper, Lex Kyler, Jason Branch, Marcus Iron, Ace Dickson, Mike Nichols
Review brief: Don't let the title fool you. While there is plenty of glory hole action here, there is also a lot of very hot ass packin. Each scene is introduced by a god-awful drag queen, Ms. Gloria Hole. Apparently, Ms. Hole is writing a book about glory holes and is running around San Fran doing "research". The first scene finds Marcus Iron and Vince Bandero meeting up for some glory hole action. After some nice cock sucking, Marcus proceeds to slide his tongue, as well as a couple of fingers up Vince's ass. Just as we think Vince is going to ride Marcus's balony pony, the tables are turned and Vince rims Marcus's lucious ass. It's finally time for the fuckin, and Vince fucks Marcus nice and hard. Marcus looks so cute with a big dick up his ass. All in all, a great scene. Scene 2 is another gem. Blake Harper starts the scene kneeling before a glory hole sucking a nice long one. There is some great camera work here, and it is obvious that Blake enjoys slurpin on this rod.
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