Weapons of Ass Destruction 3 (Evil Angel) Review

Reviewed by howie  on  6/28/2005

What’s in my DVD player (mainstream): The Eagles – Farewell I Tour - Live From Melbourne
For any Eagles fan, this is a must have even though we all know this isn’t their last “farewell” tour. There are 30 songs in this 2-disc set and the audio/video quality is great.

Director: Jules Jordan
Running time: 3:00

Notable extras / Production values:
The 2nd disc holds the special features and some of the worthwhile extras are:
-- Fetish menu 1: tease, toys, blowjobs, spanking and anal sex
-- Fetish menu 2: squirting, rimming, DP, ATM, cumshots
-- Extra footage: some footage from each scene that didn’t survive the editing for the main feature
-- Teasers: trailers for Perfect Specimens, Feeding Frenzy 4, Trained Teens 3, and Flesh Hunter 6
-- The production values, which I deem to be audio and video quality, DVD mastering, and camerawork, are what is the norm for Evil Angel and Jules Jordan --- top notch and come no better.

My short review:
I admit that I’ve been jaded and the cause of which may have influenced my last few reviews. I had high standards in my prior ratings of pornos, now ever more so after watching WOAD 3. This is the best porno ever, in my opinion. And I’m going to try to answer the following question for you readers in this brief review, “Why is WOAD 3 the best porno that I have ever seen?”

Scene 1 – Teagan Presley & Mark Ashley:
Is it because WOAD 3 starts on a high note with Teagan, the hot “it” girl at the time of this release in 2004, and her gorgeous, oiled, bubble butt dressed in a naughty school girl outfit getting her ass invaded with a dildo, cock and anal beads separately while she sexily whimpers her pleasure? And let’s not forget the doggie position with her perfect ass sticking up and a dildo in her ass while Mark drills her pussy. Or is it when lying on her back with 2 large beads in her ass Mark fucks her pussy hard and fast before she sucks on the beads from her ass? Or is it because of her squirting pussy juices after some fingering by Mark as she is giving head? Not quite why but let’s move on past this great opening scene.

Scene 2 – Tiffany Mynx with Alberto Rey, Mark Wood, Arnold & Mr. Pete:
Is it because of Tiffany with a body full of curves in all the right places getting gangbanged throughout the house including plenty of anal and DP in multiple positions? Or is it from the look on Tiffany’s face that she wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere else except pleasuring the male cast and us voyeurs? Or is it from seeing Tiffany take all the loads in her mouth and swallowing it all down? Unbeknownst to me at the time of 1st viewing, this scene turned out to be the least liked scene for me but that’s only because one scene had to rate the lowest.

Scene 3 – Jayna Oso & Roxy Jezel with Michael Stefano:
Is it because this scene for which I had no great expectation, turned out to be hot as all hell with Michael, Jayna and Roxy having fantastic chemistry and energy that should be the envy of all directors and performers as on this day when lightning was caught in a bottle? Or is it when Michael and Roxy dominate Jayna in the early going with the same anal beads from Teagan’s scene in Jayna’s bent over ass and a dildo held by Roxy in Jayna’s pussy soon to be joined by Michael’s raging hard-on for a triple filling? Or is it after Jayna gets her orgasm in CG anal that she supplies her mouth for ATOGM as Roxy is getting railed in doggie anal? Or is the passion filled cum swap that Roxy gives to Jayna to end this scene? This scene was on fire but didn’t provide the definitive answer that we’re searching for.

Scene 4 – Rose with Mark Wood, Brett Rockman, Arnold & Scott Lyons:
Is it because of Rose, the greatest looking and hottest Asian with an unbelievable body who could’ve surpassed Asia Carrera if only she stayed around longer, participating in her first on-screen gangbang, anal and DP as she decided to fulfill many a fantasy for her admirers? Is it because Rose gives us hope that similar to her case, all of our favorite performers will get around eventually to partaking in all our desired sex acts and voice encouragement throughout the act(s)? Or is it because of her airs and self-respect that she holds dear that she won’t just kiss any guy on the lips as one guy tries to do throughout the scene? Or is it from watching her perfect body and her orifices getting filled to the brim with nary a regret? Or is it the cum glazing on her face from 4 facials to end the scene? We’re getting there but let’s wait for the final scene to formulate our final answer to the burning question.

Scene 5 – Charmane Star with Jules Jordan:
Is it because Charmane, who rivals any performer in the looks department, is about to get her anal cherry broken on film by Jules as she enters the scene wearing a black latex raincoat over black girdle, garter, stockings and matching thong as she teases us knowing that we can’t wait a second longer for her ass to be probed? Or is it after sucking Jules’ rock-hard boner this exchange takes place?

Charmane: “This dick is so hard.”
Jules: “Where do you want me to put it?”
Charmane: “I want you to put it in my fucking ass.”

Or is it after Jules and Charmane teasing us with 10 minutes of vag penetration and then watching Jules enter Charmane’s spread eagled ass and wishing with every bone in your body that it is your cock giving rise to her oohs, aahs, and moans of pleasure as Jules’ balls slap against her ass? Or is it due to Charmane in CG anal and switching to mish anal and also lovingly licking her ass juices off his cock? Or is it the monster facial that Charmane willingly takes and as it glues Charmane’s eyes shut to end the scene?

Summary:
If you haven’t guessed already, the reason why Weapons of Ass Destruction 3 is the best porno that I have ever seen is the totality of the scenes that judged individually offers so, so much for our viewing and stroking pleasure starting with Teagan to Tiffany to Roxy & Jayna to Rose and ending with Charmane. Each scene stood on its own as a great scene. And judged collectively, is as good as an assemblage of scenes as there ever will be in porn as each actress turned in a hot performance.

Prior to WOAD 3, Heavy Metal 4 held the honor of being the best porno that I had ever seen and I will be hard pressed to take WOAD 3 off of the top rung. So to answer another question --- yes, I’ve been jaded in my recent reviews for all pornos subsequently viewed had fallen short in comparison to WOAD 3 but I do hold out hope that something else comes along that can takes its place on my mantle.

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