Starbangers 8 Review

Reviewed by fu_q  on  12/21/2018

**Note – This review is based upon the web version of the film streaming and available for download on the HotMovies.com service. As such, any bonuses haven’t been given a rating, and there could be some discrepancies between this version and other releases.**

Review:
The sassy English lassie of yesteryear (the lovely and lusty Nici Sterling), all three of her open-for-business holes, and even her well-known willingness to please sadly aren't enough to save the directorial and technical debacle that is "Starbangers 8", a subpar, 1996 release from Fantastic Pictures. Taking Sterling--with her reputation for hardcore, anal antics and onscreen enthusiasm--and coupling her with 18 or so of the better cocksmen in the biz for a massive gangbang should be a no-brainer, right? A guaranteed winner, right? Wrong. Unfortunately, that isn't the case in this disappointment of a production that serves as the distinct nadir of a once-proud and -promising line from just a couple of years before. Indeed, the utter lack of any human voice, noise, or grunt, coupled with a horribly-chosen, sleep-inducing musical soundtrack to play over the action, completely kills this release. Likewise, the guys in this one just more or less stand around jerking off, waiting for their turn to jump in and wondering what to do with themselves in the meantime. The entire production--an anal, DP gangbang with an AVN Hall-of-Famer in her prime, mind you--feels like it's running on sedatives and intentionally paced (slowed down) to elevator music. What a shame. It's like somebody threw a gangbang and nobody came... at least the viewer didn't, that's for sure. Do yourself a favor and avoid this slow-paced, horribly produced and edited piece of garbage. Watching it is like being put on hold on the telephone for 80+ minutes, except instead of holding a phone, you're holding your limp, disappointed dick...and your wallet is $15 lighter. Buy something else. (Poor, Nici. She deserved so much better than this.)

In terms of the sex, Scene One finds the bodacious British babe, Nici Sterling, clad in flowing, white lingerie and reposing seductively upon a silky, red bed. The backdrop is one of clouds, pillars, and a checkerboard floor, and it isn't horribly long before her first guy makes his appearance, sliding aside her panties and going to work on her pussy with his tongue. A second stud joins them, and his cock ends up in her mouth...and then a third...and so on, until Ms. Sterling is surrounded by dicks and fielding them orally and vaginally. The single bit of fish in an otherwise massive sausage party, Nici takes the assorted cocks as they come at her (with the rest pulling their puds in the background). Eventually (well into the film), her pooper gets involved, too, and the guys run the A-train on her...and then they up the ante with a series of double-penetrations (DP's). Throughout, it truly seems as though the action has been intentionally slowed down (i.e. slow motion) in the editing process to match the perma-hold-inspired soundtrack. (Who washes out the sex with elevator music... and then lets the elevator music pace the sex? Sad!) Anyway, what could have been an awesome film (but wasn't) ends up with the guys showering Nici's face, chest, and body in cum for about 8 minutes...which is hot...even to a Kenny G-inspired groove. What a mess (...in a bad way). Sigh... They can't all be winners, son.


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