Reality 17: Anal Desires Review

Private's magazine-style Reality series has so far provided snack-size servings of smut in a format that often acts as a taster for more substantial offerings. Once more we find the chance to sample the work of some of Private's newer directors as they lead an interesting cast, some stellar, and some less so, in a selection of vignettes and backstage reports.

Dreamy
Soffie wakes, wanting to make love, but Paul's got to get to work, the fool. She dreams up a sun-drenched poolside scene where he simply can't resist her charms. Hands free oral looks rather saucy, and the curvy Czech brunette looks damn good being taken from behind. They fuck in spoons and later Paul goes deeply between Soffie's full bum cheeks into her ass, which is ultimately doused in come. Soffie is wakened fro her dream once more to find Paul's decided to stay home today - not such a fool after all.

Director Tom Herold's style looks good but feels vacuous, the trappings of blue sky and crystal water putting me in mind of the empty-headed beautiful people lazing by the pool in the likes of Brett Easton Ellis' Less Than Zero. All too often Herold cuts the action just when it's getting heated, especially to show some posed shot of reflections in the pool, rather than fully appreciating Soffie's sometimes fiery sexuality.

XXX
To see big, blonde, fake busted Gina, the epitome of American stripper chic, in a Private product, apparently due to some headline grabbing connection to Eminem, may well be an affront to Europhile Private aficionados, but to me the extremely cheap and tacky visuals of this music-video style clip are every bit as offensive. It's just a fast-cut sequence of low-rent blowjob footage, slung together with minimal competence. Brevity is its sole virtue.

Private Tropical: Caribbean Vacation - Report
On the set reportage meets unchallenging advertising for this Alessandro Del Mar (AKA Max Bellocchio) production. Sun, sea and sex make for the usual light-hearted nonsense. If I tell you the highlight of this is to see the director himself imitating Celine Dion warbling her abysmal Titanic tune from the prow of a sailing ship, then you may appreciate how utterly free of genuine interest this sequence is.

Waiting for You in a Room
This scene could easily be an off-cut from director Gazzman's Private Sports: Moto XXX or Desert Foxxx efforts. Australian Thunder (a bloke, not a weather forecast) and Melanie Jagger arrive at Amythiest Stone's house and quickly get into a steamy, soft focus sex session. I like buxom brunette Melanie a lot but while I don't recall seeing hard looking, small-busted Amythiest before, I'd frankly be lying if I said I was eager to see her again.

So, on with the sex - Aussie pours oil over the girls' bodies and they grind their pussies together while Melanie slurps his cock. Her big soft tits wobble while she fingers her playmate ahead of her sitting on his face as he slips into Amythiest's pussy. She states the obvious. A lot. How annoying. Aussie fucks Melanie, Amythiest nibbles her nipples and then the chap goes from one pussy to the other. Only Melanie partakes of anal sex, and her lusty riding of Aussie's cock provides the sole hint of anything out with the slick but superficial constraints of this glossy but unfulfilling affair. The Australian cocksman rounds it off by shooting come over the girls' bodies.

No Job, No Blow - Report
So, how come Kovi has the cast, the crew, the costumes, the studio facilities, and the technical expertise and still comes up with more extravagant silliness like this? Such questions are not answered by a "report" revealing nothing more scandalous than Kovi clowning around with his crew but it does make some fairly pretentious claims for another fetish fantasy flick from the heavyweight Hungarian. The groan-inducing title refers to the story, which seemingly concerns Csoky Ice being ordered to find work if he wants action from his dominant wife, played by Melinda Casta. Naturally he gets lots of action in his job-hunting, mostly, it appears, with top-class European stars like Michelle Wild in typically fanciful Kovi-style locations.

Living a Dream
While subtlety and Jean-Yves Le Castel usually go together like condoms and Catholicism, I must admit that he has the delightful duo of Lucy Lee and Stacy Silver looking especially foxy. Okay, so one must set aside the crap music, the soft focus, the equally soft girly play and Stacy's completely unnecessary breast implants, but I assure you, it looks bloody good! I emphasise looks because the sex, with ol' smoothie Steve Holmes as the lucky man, seems to have been hacked to bits in editing. Shame - it's not as if this lightweight volume is running out of time.

Still, it's enjoyable to see the beautiful girls treating Steve to oral sex. Then Stacy rides him while Lucy plants her sweet pussy on his face. Steve takes Lucy in doggy, Stacy rides a little longer, now taking it anally, and Lucy does ass-to-mouth. The girls switch roles, Lucy riding all too briefly. Spoons anal with Stacy sets Steve off and he pulls his already spunking cock from Stacy's bum to shoot right on Lucy's face. It's a frustrating scene, really, with an over reliance on cutting from one position to another, but in this company it seems like a welcome treat.

Erotic Fantasy
And now for something just a little different. The exceptionally attractive Alexa Mai (AKA Eva, Aleksandra etc, now on her 1000th pseudonym) is clearly being lined up for stardom and duly stars in this daydream scenario. Her browsing of a glossy porn mag causes her to masturbate and wander off into a dream where she's the centre of attention in a group grope…on a bus (!), for some reason.

Cutting back and forth from pastel shaded colour footage of Alexa's masturbation and black and white footage of the group scene, photographer and director Gianni di Palma, AKA John Palmer, brings a modicum of style to proceedings. Though his approach uses techniques that might seem familiar to fans of certain "arty" directors, the combination of the gentle action - I hesitate to call it a gangbang because it's the gentlest gangbang you'll ever see with no DPs, not even anal - and the soothing ambient music that accompanies it make for a relaxed viewing experience.

It's not terribly original or desperately debauched, it's perhaps the antithesis of the kind of thing I'm usually after, but I find it quite pleasing to watch and, again by comparison with much of what's gone before, it's a sound piece of work. And in case you thought I was forgetting, Alexa is just gorgeous, but like I say, don't expect to see her in a raw, rough gangbang - this is all about some sedate sex and laidback self-loving. Yet, as with her lovely scene in Denis Marti's Young and Wild, there's something especially thrilling about seeing this beautiful girl lewdly sucking gentlemen's parts. Her angel face lights up any scene.

Overall
When describing this series as snack-size porn, I hardly expected it that this edition would be quite so unsatisfying. Even when taken as a whole, Reality 17 amounts to no more than another meagre morsel offered by Private. There are maybe two and a half decent scenes, at best, the rest being quite inconsequential fluff. It baffles me how Private can package and present it all so perfectly, with smart graphics, polished production and a wealth of good looking people at their disposal, and yet have, at heart, a really lightweight product.

Even the best scenes look good but suffer from an over-eager hand with the scissors. Le Castel has captured one of the best-looking scenes with Lucy and Stacy that I've seen, and Herold and di Palma display visual flair, but no-one really supplies the substantial sex that, frankly, I never really expected from this line anyway. Ultimately, there's not a whole lot to sink your teeth into and unless you're looking for something particularly unchallenging with which to spend an hour or so, or you're an obsessive fan of the likes of Lucy Lee, then there's really little reason to bother with Reality 17.

DVD Comments
As I mentioned, this is a well-made product, as always, with the usual welter of language options, trailers, photos, cast information and so on, though I should note that the box cover is misleading in suggesting two "making of" clips are among the extras - these are the aforementioned reports and are included within the scanty running time. The picture quality is excellent throughout, with fine clarity and colour, and sharp sound to go with it.