Cheating Housewives 3 (Smash Pictures) Review

Reviewed by MD James  on  9/2/2006

Title: Cheating Housewives 3
Released by: Smash Pictures
Reviewed by MD James

Ah time to take a trip down the neighboring streets of ABC’s fictional "Wisteria Lane".

It’s not hard to see the comparisons between the women of Smash Pictures’ "Cheating Housewives 3" and the women of "Desperate Housewives". Even the box cover plays upon the promotional images that the big major network used… the apples, the women, their descriptions.

Unfortunately that’s where the comparisons end.

Basically the women of "Smashingbird Lane" aren’t desperate. They’re pissed. They’re not getting fucked like they want to get fucked and they’ve decided to do something about it. They’re not huddled around a kitchen table sipping coffee and mourning their withering love lives. They’re out there getting what their husbands won’t give them.

Now once we choose to play the video, we have an interesting option: we can choose to see the whole video with the stories, or jump right to the sex for each scene. I think this is a great option, so kudos to Smash for coming up with it.

Scene 1: Lisa Ann and Ben English

We start with Lisa Ann chatting on the phone with a friend while munching on an apple. She’s talking about this guy she met at the car wash and how she wasn’t happy with her married life. She gave the guy her number, and soon he’s calling on the other line. He’s on his way over to see her. Once he pulls into her driveway and smashes the partly-eaten apple, he strolls on in like he owns the place. He meets her in the back as another person looks on (the husband?) in disgust.

They quickly move to the staircase, where they start kissing and he starts undressing her and playing with her very hot body. She quickly undresses him and then goes down on his huge cock with a vengeance. He sits down on the stairs and she mounts herself on top of him in reverse-cowgirl position. She rides him hard and fast for a while. They reposition themselves so he’s fucking her in standing doggie-position. Then he sits back down on the stairs and she bounces up and down in cowgirl position for a while until he stands up and does her in standing cowgirl position before going back to the stairs in missionary position. Then she sucks him until he does a facial pop all over her mouth. The two of them move their naked asses up the stairs as the unseen third person watches.

This was a really good way to start off the video. Lisa Ann still looks very hot.

Scene 2: Donna Doll and Sascha

Turns out Lisa’s "hubby" (Sascha) was the unseen person, and he had a video camera to record the whole thing. He decides that turnabout is fair play, so he makes he way (without a shirt) over to neighboring Donna’s place. Donna, of course, knew about Lisa’s affairs, and she’s just as pissed because her husband is supposedly cheating on her too. Hey, two people getting cheated on… why not take their revenge out on each other?

They start kissing and he stars groping and undressing her business attire as she’s talking to the unseen cameraman. He gets her down to her bra, garter belt, and stockings, and she takes his pants off and goes down on him with a vengeance. He bends her over the couch, her bra magically disappears, and he fucks her in doggie position hard and fast. She gives him some more deep, gagging blowjobs, then it’s back to doggie. He gets on the couch and it’s her turn to mount him in reverse-cowgirl position. Then it’s cowgirl position, standing cowgirl, missionary, and pile-driver missionary, and then she goes on her knees while he blows his load all around her mouth. Afterwards she belittles her husband on camera one final time.

It wasn’t too bad, although Donna spent more time fucking FOR the camera than fucking ON camera. They make it sound like their plan of vengeance was cooked up on the spot, but the groping and performing for the camera suggests otherwise.

Scene 3: Aurora Snow and Jenner

Aurora (or "Arora" as the credits called her) is seen having her groceries brought to her SUV by the "bag boy" (Jenner). She watches as he unloads the bags into her vehicle as they make small talk about her kids. He accidentally drops a bag of apples and the two of them pick up the same apple. Next thing we know, we see the two of them in her house as he brings the groceries into her kitchen. (Now THAT’S service!) He wants to leave but she wants him to stay. She makes a very convincing argument for him to stay, including taking off his shirt.

Finally he agrees to stay. She gets up on the island counter and hikes up her long skirt to show that she’s not wearing any panties. He finger-fucks her for a while before she gets down on her knees and gives his cock a good duckjob. He positions her over the island and fucks her in standing doggie-style. She gets on her back on top of the main counter and he fucks her in standing missionary. Then they both get on the counter and he fucks her in anal spoon for a really long time before he gets on the island counter and she sucks him, then gets on top for anal reverse-cowgirl. Then they go to the floor for some anal doggie, where he fucks her hard and fast until finally he just blows his load all over her ass.

Now THIS was the best scene so far! Aurora looked like she was REALLY into it, and they made creative and realistic use of the environment. They also did a GREAT job establishing Aurora’s character as an actual MILF instead of just implying that she is one. This is something that is sorely missed with videos that CLAIM to be of the MILF category.

Scene 4: Carrie Ann and Mark Davis

Carrie (or "Cerrie" as she’s mistakenly referred to in the credits) is seen with Mark as she explains to him that he was brought over because her husband is out and she wants to play. She’s not getting any and she wants some NOW.

They start kissing and he gropes at her body. He’s clearly in charge in this scenario. He hikes up her dress and finger-fucks her until she climaxes. The dress comes off and he takes his pants off. He teases her with his cock until she takes him into her mouth without her hands. He lays her down on the armrest of the sofa and fucks her in standing missionary position. They move to the couch and she rides him in cowgirl position. Then she turns around for reverse-cowgirl, then she gets back on her knees as he blows his load into and around her mouth.

This was a good scene. Carrie Ann is also very easy on the eyes. It’s also refreshing watching a male-dominant scene compared to the angst-ridden female-dominant tones that many of these scenes offer.

Scene 5: Nicole Sheridan and Voodoo

Our last pairing of the video starts with Nicole spitting her apple chunks at the mirror in front of her husband. She’s caught him jerking off in the sink to an AVN magazine. ("But, but, honey-bumps, the slutty little whore I’m jerking off to looks just like you!") She belittles him and then storms away. (Note to director: the in-your-face camera view of Nicole makes her look like she’s got a pig’s snout.) The camera follows a trial of apples until we see her on the couch with "the apple guy" (Voodoo). She announces that since she’s not good enough for her husband’s cock, he gets to "watch" as she fucks her new boy-toy.

She spreads her legs wide and plays with her pussy while groping at his pants. She slides off his pants and goes down on his cock as he eats an apple. She takes off her shirt and he tit-fucks her. She lubes his cock up and then he enters her in missionary position. He tells her that her pussy is really tight, and she replies that it’s all because "Mister Little-Dick" doesn’t stretch it out like he does. (Now THAT’S cold! She should have been called "The Ice Queen".) He fucks her in this position for a while before the change places and she rides him in cowgirl position, fucking her until she has a strong orgasm. Then she turns around and mounts him again, this time in anal reverse-cowgirl. She rides him in this position for a while, hard and heavy. Then they move to anal spoon position, where they go at it until he finally jerks off all over her right breast and the apple. She takes a huge bite of the apple then spits it at the camera as it fades out.

This scene wasn’t too bad. It was hot and heavy, and Nicole did seem to be very much into it, but the apple-spitting and the belittling were turnoffs for this reviewer.

We end the video with a behind-the-scene look at the photoshoot done with the five women surrounded by the apples as the credits roll to the left side. This, by the way, is also a nice touch by Smash Pictures.

In terms of extras… well besides the option to view either the whole video or just the sex scenes, we have the option to pick a certain position and just see each of the women perform it (that is, if they did do that in their scenes). Only two of the five women did anal scenes, so you’ll only see the anal scenes for them. There’s also the full behind-the-scenes video, which includes an interview with Lisa Ann (and nice impromptu flash) and Carrie Ann, and the photoshoot with the apples on the floor, and a little teaser by Aurora. There’s also six individual clickable trailers for other videos (including My Playtoy #3, which I previously reviewed), an animated photo gallery with techno music, and a nice little animated plug for legalskin.com and smashpictures.com.

Credit HAS to be given to Smash Pictures for doing a great job in post-production. The menu options look good. They’re simple and easy-to-access, and they are options that some other studios really never take the time to provide. The lack of forced trailers once you start the video is also a welcomed sight for this reviewer.

The only downsides to this video are relatively minor ones. Since this reviewer has never seen the first two "Cheating Housewives" videos, I can’t really compare them to this one. However since I have seen the mainstream series that this whole idea is based upon, I can say that the overall story could have used a little more work. Aside from the first two scenes, there’s really nothing connecting these five scenes together other than the adultery and the apples. I would have preferred at least some sort of narration to link the five scenes together, much like you see with the mainstream series. The vengeful put-downs by both Donna and Nicole along with Nicole spitting apple chunks were also turnoffs for this reviewer. Also the box cover plugs this video as a "MILF" video. The MILF idea was never developed in the scenes other than for Aurora’s character, so I’d stay away from using that reference. Housewives: yes. MILF: only for 1 out of 5.

All-in-all, though, this is a GREAT video to get from Smash Pictures. Depending on where you go, you can get this video for anywhere between $7 and $20, but I believe that it is worth MUCH, much more than that! You’re really getting a bargain just from the quality that is in the DVD, and I would certainly recommend this to anyone looking for hot babes (especially Lisa Ann fans) and hot nasty sex.