Anabolic Cum Shots 1 Review

Reviewed by Principal Skinner  on  11/15/2000

For those who don't want to waste their porn viewing time on superfluous scenes involving, character, plot, foreplay, fellatio, cunnilingus, or intercourse, then without a doubt Anabolic CUMSHOTS is a must-own DVD! Since the company's entire library of videos will certainly take awhile to make its way to the DVD format, it is only fitting that the viewer enjoy a "greatest hits" cumpilation of money shots, most of which are among the nastiest ever shot in porn history. Of course, hot and filthy cumshots should be no surprise from a company like Anabolic, which is why I was especially interested in reviewing this particular title over all other compilations of this genre. Immediately after watching this two hour, twenty minute disc from beginning to end (with many needed breaks in between to...do, ummm...other...stuff), I desperately requested that our kind and generous hostess at Adult DVD Talk allow me to review the remaining volumes of CUMSHOTS, which to my sadness and sorrow, were already spoken for and under critique by less deserving reviewers [just kidding!].

The title starts off with a bang, as we see twin sisters Vivien and Sophien (from WORLD SEX TOUR #4) spit a wad of testicular yogurt back and forth into each other's mouth as the opening credits roll. From here on end, some of the most impressive and prodigious money shots are stitched together like one of those WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS [fill in the blank]... videos that show only the good stuff for our voyeuristic pleasures. The choice of material ranges from great to excellent, with only a few otherwise pedestrian orgasms splashing around hither and thither. In particular, I was glad to see scenes from GANG BANG GIRL #13, where Francesca Le performs some of the nastiest cum-swallowing I have ever seen outside of a I SWALLOW feature. This excerpt shows her slurping the protein shake through a straw, being fed the man milk with a spoon, and generally having her pretty face and tongue annointed with a mass of sticky goo. Naturally, Francesca's oral conduct will either hold your rapt attention in awe, or make you puke.

Speaking of being grossed out, I admit to being less than thrilled with the climactic shots from Maeva's gangbang (which is also from GBG #13), where the annoying and repulsive Tony Montana spills his seed into the girl's mouth, picks up some of the remnants, smears it on his tongue, and then gives her a wet, juicy kiss. And yes, I had the same reaction: Ugh! (Even gangbangee Maeva seems taken aback about Tony's desire to eat his own liquid genetic code, as she gives him a befuddled look). And just when I thought the worst of it was over, Mr. Montana repeats the same stunt with some frizzy haired blonde a couple of minutes later! (And if you think reading about it is nauseating, at least now you have some warning about these scenes before you play the disc; as for me, those disturbing images are forever burned into my memory like a visual tragedy).

But what's most notable about this collection is that currently unavailable titles from the Anabolic catalog, like GANG BANG GIRL #20 and BUTTBANGED CYCLE SLUTS are excerpted onto this disc, so that the viewer may once again bear witness to Misty Rain cumswapping with Vanessa Chase, or Tyra Olsen getting a faceful of splooge from her gang bangers (these videos were withdrawn from the marketplace due to some copyright problems with the Harley Davidson people). Other highlights include include the incredibly cute Tara Monroe lining her lips with Mark Davis' dick glue before lovingly giving him a post-cum blowjob, and Debi Diamond tearing apart used condoms with her teeth before draining the contents into her throat. And all this takes place within the first hour of the video, with plenty more to come [obvious pun ignored] for the remaining eighty minutes. Of course, not all cumshots are exceptional, and not all women are even close to being Vivid Girl- attractive. But the sheer breadth in variety and overall nastiness of each scene more than make up for any shortcomings.

Video quality of this DVD varies from scene to scene, depending on the original source of the segment. Audio is excellent, as Anabolic has removed the original music soundtrack from its videos, allowing the natural sound of sex to remain intact. The reason for this is to avoid sudden jumps and inconsistencies in music and allow for smoother transitions from footage to footage. I applaud Anabolic's careful attention to such details, which makes watching this collection a thoroughly enjoyable experience. Extras include a bunch of trailers on the flip side of the disc, and a chapter selection button which breaks the movie down in blocks so that you can get to the middle or end of the disc without scanning.

Overall, as far as cumshot compilations go, this is the best one I have ever seen; you get a superior presentation of superior scenes from a superior company. Highly recommended.