A-Team XXX: A Parody, The Review

Reviewed by bono-ONE  on  8/31/2010

Good day porn fans time to check out another parody, this one focusing in on the popular 80' show The A Team-- seems ripe for a go right, The Anal Team, lol. But no the show was about ex-military guys on the run and if you needed help in a dire situation and were able to get a hold of them then the A Team would save the day. No exactly how one would go about doing that I don't think was ever really explained but who cares! The story here seems to be Bree Olson has had a husband go missing and she calls the guys in to find him.

It was cool the opening here was fairly close to what you heard to open the tv show and even the music felt right. The next minute or so is taken to introduce this rag tag band of mercenaries along with some footage of the movie. Randy Spears looks like he had way to much fun playing Hannibal and Evan Stone definitely has the looks to play Face. Tyler Knight as BA was spot on and Scott Lyons as Murdock was close as well. You see others in the cast including Bree, Sophie Dee and McKenzie Lee. One other detail they nailed was the Van, anyone who's watched the show knows the van so you couldn't skimp on that and get away with it. On to the movie!

Bree Olson:

Alright we get right to it as Bree is joined by her husband but he's coming into the house and turns out they've been split for over a year. However the two are working together and I gather the split was over him fucking another girl. Well Bree is horny so those troubles are set aside so we can have our first bit of naughty time. A little play for those rocking tits from touching to kissing and some pussy rubbing too. But we all know Bree's a cock hungry gal so she's all over Seth's member in short order. The sex was good, Bree in reverse and talking dirty was real hot and we get some anal luv too in cowgirl and mish before hubby blows his nut up her stomach. He goes back in for a few final pumps before we're done. In the post fuck bliss her husband tells about a hot story he's working on, possible Pulitzer prize winning but Bree does not have a good feeling about it. The kiss of death comes when he says he'll be back before dawn-- never say that because you won't be back, lol.

So we cut to the dawn and find Seth at the location where a big deal is going down and hello let's greet Monstar who cameos as a baddie handing over the dope and in return taking a grey case presumed full of dirty money. Seth's there snapping away documenting this but something tells me he won't be sending those pics into the LA Times anytime soon. So Monstar and his crew drive off replaced by one of LA's finest driving up and ok seems John Q Law is in on the drug trade, now I know why I don't live in LA! Roy Karch makes a cool cameo too playing I assume a higher up in the force, he tests the dope and then drives off leaving the main crew there. Seth's cell goes off and this gives him away, lol. Hot pursuit then occurs as they chase after him-- his car was in plain sight and you couldn't miss him taking pics before but it's the cell that gives him away, had to laugh at that. Ok Seth makes it home but Bree's not there. He hurriedly takes out the film and hides it just before the bad guys arrive- why would you go home, lol. Suffice to say they take him away before he can let Bree know everything in a quick cell call- the pic negatives are hidden in a couch cushion. Short time later Bree's at the paper berating Seth's bosses that they need to do something about what he told her on the cell phone, I see Bree works at the paper too but they won't lift a finger to help. Ok he sorta resembles Jonah Jameson of the Spiderman films and then he yells out Parker as Bree storms off so that wasn't so subtle.

Ok no one will help Bree so now it's The A Teams turn! Cut to a park and Bree's there with James Bartholet, not sure who he is but he knows Seth and lets Bree know about the A team and how they came about. James came prepared too with detailed files on each member complete with nice glossy glamour shots, lol. Bree takes this in and asks how to find them. James points her to a local VA hospital that Scott Lyons character, Morecock, is in having lost his mind due to so much action in Vietnam-- wrong war to use because they don't claim it's not present day and Vietnam was like 40 years ago, I'd have changed it to the first Gulf War. Anyway Bree heads off to the ward to find Morecock and get some answers. Chastity Lynn is there as the nurse and she'll be back later for a sponge bath for Scott but she leaves them so Bree can get down to business. Scott doesn't let on he fully knows what Bree's asking for but she leaves and he places a call. Short time later we find Cannibal, Ace, and BA sitting in a car and Cannibal lets them know they're heading to LA. Fans of the show know BA hates to fly, is terrified so they have to knock him out, hence Ace in the backseat gettin a syringe ready. Next shot shows the men taking off for Tinsel town. BA wakes up and we get some amusing dialogue on how they got to LA. Cut then to Bree coming into a shop asking for Mr. Lee who turns out to be Cannibal in disquise, lol. Randy Spears has way to much fun in this short role telling Bree it will cost $100,000 to save her man and Bree is told to meet the A Team behind a sleezy strip club that night. Now they just need to spring Morecock out of the hospital and the A Team can kick some ass.

Chastity Lynn:

Before we get Morecock sprung out we first must have some fun for the Nurse who doesn't buy Ace's story one bit. But he can have Morecock for a weekend pass after she's had her fun!! So Ace leaves for a bit and we get to watch Chastity. Some cock play from Nurse Lynn as well as Scott getting to greet her titties. A little more then with our nurse giving Scott's dick some much needed attention, don't think he'll be seeing any kind of nasty action after this. Cut then to Scott blasting away in mish and we get some good shots as Chastity rides in reverse- she's nice and vocal here too. Alright we get some added fun in reverse when Scott changes to her ass. A dip in spoon anal and we end up with Scott popping to her waiting face/ mouth. Ok now take off with the boys!

The next shot takes us to night and Bree behind the sleezy club waiting for the A team to show up. There's a homeless guy there too rummaging through the trash but Bree doesn't take a close look at him and we get to see it's actually Cannibal.

Sophie Dee & McKenzie Lee:

After a bit of a wait between the first and second sex scenes the third comes relatively quickly as we leave Cannibal and Bree in the back alley to join Ace aka Evan inside and he's spreading the Benjamins around to Sophie and McKenzie- boasting too about whatever, he just wants to get laid! Well it works as the trio twirl tongues and we get down to business. The titties come out and Evan dives in. The girls free up his cock and McKenzie/ Sophie aren't timid here, nope they give that dick something to remember! The girls then take turns on his cock with Sophie doing well to ride Evan's face! There is some anal then for McKenzie, in piledriver no less. The anal luv is spread to Sophie too so both asses are tested here with McKenzie then doing the right thing and riding Evan's face. The pop to close is spread to both outstretched tongues and the girls jointly lick the shaft as we fade out.

We head back out to the alley where Cannibal finally decides it's time to make contact. Bree finally acknowledges him but still thinks he's a bum and gives him money. One knock at the backdoor and Ace steps out and the A Team has finally met Bree who begins to spill the details about her hubby. Bree plays them the message and shows the cash which is a bit less than the $100 large. Cannibal takes it though and says they'll be in touch. Mysteriously the huge Black van is now there, gee that wasn't there before, lol. Guess it pulled up with no sound once Bree and the guys started this short meeting. A short time later the guys pull over and Ace isn't down for the job due to the shortness of funds but since this is a drug deal Cannibal thinks there's plenty of money involved on the bad guys end and doesn't seem to worried about not being compensated for their role here. So the plan is Ace will work his sources about this biker gang and they'll meet the next day at their hideout, Cannibal gets to deliver the famous I love it when a plan comes together line.The action then takes us to a local biker bar- I'm sure there are several in the greater Los Angeles area but evidently this is the one where the guys will find out about this nasty bunch of men that is holding Bree's husband. Cannibal tries the subtle approach but that doesn't work and Morecock tries biting one of the baddies legs. Cannibal then gets a second wind knocking the baddie out with the butt of his gun. BA helps by getting out and playing a boom box-- it's a tune of lots of guns firing so this delays the bad guys and allows the A Team to escape.

That's right I said big Boom box!! As some loud music plays we get two loan bad dudes chasing behind the big van on motorcycles-- ahh a Chase scene!!! There's some good shots once they hit the open road for this chase, eventually they dump the two guys and head back to their hideout. Hmm seems this kidnapping has made the local news and who turns up from the Law to offer something but Roy Karch who we saw earlier sampling the dope so that doesn't bode well for our kidnapped journalist. So we head back to Bree's place where she's arriving home and looking for clues-- she tries the cushions and eventually finds the film!!Ok she was looking because Cannibal asked her to, what a smart guy. Bree heads back out presumably to give him and the team this new piece of info. She gives them the info and they take off leaving Morecock behind to watch over Bree. The action then takes us to Roy's place where we also see Monstar there!! Ok there's a nightime janitor there mopping the floors and like all good guys they ignore him or at least don't think he'll hear anything. Turns out it's Cannibal in blackface with an afro-- they really are giving Randy some looks in this one. Roy's not concerned about any details so he tells Monstar their plan is still very much a go. Ok Monstar leaves and Roy shares the last bit of the plan with the lone policeman still there. They're going to double cross the biker gang at this ransom pick up for the reporter and any biker member not shot/ killed will be arrested and sent out of town. The big muscle bound guy who's the point man for the gang will take the fall leaving the ransom to be split between Roy and this sole officer. Naturally Cannibal hears all of this, lol. Seems Roy's got a new crime bill he wants to push and this will be a huge success for that and he can move on to being a state senator-- ahh the motive comes out!

The cop leaves and Cannibal makes his move forcing Roy to come along for a ride. So Cannibal, Roy, Ace and BA head back to the wherehouse, guess Roy will be the ransom to ransom the reporter, lol. Roy's people have no choice but to let them in and the vans pulls in as multiple guys are trained on them. Roy actually gets the drop on them and punches out Cannibal- man what a pussy to be dropped with one punch, lol. This leaves the team in serious jeopardy and suddenly we are whisked away to where I don't know but in walks Bree with Morecock and you see Seth's there bound and one biker guy is guarding him, he's quickly knocked out and Bree/ Seth are reunited. How they found him I have no idea. Anyway Bree wants to see this through as Morecock explains he has to now go and rescue Cannibal. Bree inquires how he knows this prompting Scott to do an old trick and speak directly to the audience watching saying obviously someone's not watched this show before. So they head off to the wherehouse where we have all the gang assembled from Roy to the head biker dude and even Monstar who finds out about the A Team and orders their execution. Luscious Lopez is there and I guess she's Monstar's girl but BA sticks out a leg and tells her she can do better as she walks by, she grins! Suddenly we hear a loud booming voice and there's lights flashing over the wherehouse, It's the FBI!! But turns out it is just Morecock with a megaphone and a lone light trying to trick Roy and the boys. At least Morecock's got a couple machine guns that he blasts off into the night to help sell this. Roy takes off with the cash and BA frees himself knocking out the cop. ACE gets to cap a couple baddies with some long range shooting. BA then goes and knocks out Monstar and takes Luscious away!

Luscious Lopez:

So we head to a room with Luscious who doesn't know how to thank BA for rescuing her. Seems Monstar had kidnapped her from her village a few years back. Well I think letting BA kiss her tits is good way to start thanking him. The red color was great on Luscious and the red flower was cool too. Tyler gets a few licks in on her pussy too before letting Luscious at his cock. Tyler had to hold back all the gold bling to lick, it was funny. After some good work sucking we get Luscious riding in cowgirl, lots of ass shaking here. There is some mish too before Tyler shifts to nailing her ass, spoon and reverse anal captured here. Good facial pop, some cleanup and BA kisses her forehead before dashing off, lol. Don't want to get captured by the real cops now does he!

Back to all the Law action. Bree is there with her hubby and their boss is there- never doubted her for a second, lol. Roy and Monstar are shown being led off in cuffs and we're almost done, just one more sex scene!Hmm the A Team is standing right there, thought they were on the run from the law, guess they don't know who they are. They don't think to take the case from Cannibal either- we saw that it was filled with cash.The team drives off.

Bree Olson:

The story is almost over but Cannibal couldn't resist one last chance to see Bree and she gets another chance to thank him and the team for their help. Turns out Bree's hubby went back to his filandering ways after being sprung so Cannibal think they risked their lives for nothing but then Bree changes his mind!! A few kisses and then she's got her lips wrapped around his cock while Randy's lips are snuggly fit around a cigar, lol. Sexwise you get doggie and mish- this also sees Randy slipping into Bree's ass causing some very nice boob swinging up top. We end with Cannibal spraying his load across those titties, I luv it when a plan Cums together!!

Extras & Final Thoughts:

Well this was not bad with some great nods to the show from the van to how they clothed the cast. Tyler's look was superb in mimmicking Mr.T and the lines we got were in good close character to what would be said on the tv show. As for the sex scenes it was great getting two anal scenes from Bree. Chastity Lynn's hospital room romp with Scott Lyons was good. Now for extras they offer up a whole separate disc with several options. You can learn about the stunts, there are interviews, bloopers, some BTS, cast members are asked if them watched the show and we get a bonus scene featuring former Adam & Eve girl Carmen Luvana taking on Johnny Castle from the title American Heroes. Great to see Carmen again and guess with Bree now being a former Adam & Eve girl this might be one of the final titles we get with Bree as their contract girl. If so it's a good one and for fans of the tv show who want to feel a little nostalgic as well as seeing some good sex this one is worth picking up.