7 Into Snowy (TVX) Review

Studio
VCX

Genre
Golden Age Classic

Director
Antonio Sheppard

Starring
Abigail Clayton, Kay Parker, Bonnie Holliday, Kristine Heller, Paul Thomas, Carl Irwin, Clay Hyde, John Leslie, John Rolling, Paul Scharf, Richard Logan, and Turk Lyon

Running Time
1:14

DVD Format
DVD-R

Aspect Ratio
1.33:1 (full frame)

Special Features
Full motion video main menu

Typical Watchers
Golden Age porn fans

Typical Haters
Anyone who hates hairy bushes, cheesy instrumental soundtracks, or circa 1970's films

Replay Value
None

Themes
Classic porn, couples porn, big tits, girl-girl, shower sex, toys, sex on the beach

Condoms
This was before AIDS

If You Liked This DVD, You Should Enjoy
Alexandra

An adult take on Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, 7 Into Snowy, is set in San Francisco, with Abigail Clayton as Snowy and Kay Parker as her evil, occult-practicing stepmother, Fedora.  Jealous of her stepdaughter's budding sexuality and beauty, she instructs her valet (Paul Thomas) seduce Snowy and then sexually abuse her.  Fedora hopes to break Snowy's spirit, drive her insane, and reclaim her title as sexiest one of them all.

Compared to contemporary porn videos, 7 Into Snowy, is very tame.  Consider the threeway lesbian scene with Abigail, Bonnie Holliday, and Kristine Heller.  For the most part, except for a few moments of explicit sex, you'll see more exciting girl-girl on late night Cinemax.  Still, even though it's tame, this movie has a lot going for it:  pretty Abigail and her perky boobs, Kay Parker and her big boobs, creative sex positions, PT and Abigail having sex on the beach, soapy rubbing between Abigail and Kristine, pearl necklaces and non-traditional money shots instead of facials, and the rich backdrop of Northern California scenery.

Unfortunately, the novelty wears off as the movie enters the final act.  Kay Parker has a truly bizzare nude dancing scene that culminates in her rubbing on two gigantic cock props.  And the perversion of Snowy by "The Magnificent Seven" studs is edited beyond recognition; it's not even a complete scene anymore, more like a few clips of a few seconds each stitched together.  It's really disappointing to be waiting for the sweet, innocent Abigail Clayton to get down and dirty, only to be let down in the end.

The A/V quality of 7 into Snowy leaves a lot to be desired, but considering the film is over 26 years old, it's not that bad.  The colors are very muted, which is probably a function of the equipment and film used as well as the film-to-video conversion, which was likely done quite a long time ago.  Pinholes, scratches, and dirt abound on the film.  For me at least, this only added to the charm of watching this movie that was made when I was a little kid.  Although the soundtrack is presented in stereo, it's very low-fidelity and tinny.  The biggest thing to point out is that the disc is not a DVD, but rather a DVD-R disc with a inkjet printed label.  While that probably is more cost-effective for the studio, I worry about quality control,  compatibility with home DVD players, and playability with the adhesive sticker.

My recommendation is to pass on this edited, featureless mess of a Golden Age classic unless you are either really into the novelty of late 70's pornographic films or have some personal attachment to it (maybe you saw it in a Pussycat Theater or it was the first X-rated film you saw).  It has all the makings of a great classic movie but the whole doesn't equal the sum of its parts.

- Saki (saki@sakivision.com)