Nat Hocken's Private Movie Reviews with Trailers (3)
Release date: 3/27/2003
Reviewed on: 7/10/2003
Studio: Private
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Starring: Natasha, Philippe Dean, Eva Falk, David Perry, Dina Jewel, John Walton, Rich Handsome, Mona Lisa, Richard Langin, Nick Lang, Frank Major, Philippe Soine, Julia Taylor, Mephisto, Sebastian Barrio, Zsofi, Elone, Pascal St. James, Jennifer Red, Erika Fire, Jack Slater, Maria Bellucci, Frank Versace
Review brief: Portrait of a Private Girl. Shes sexy, young, and most likely Hungarian; a trooper who takes it in the ass deep, hard, and fast, and is nearly as willing to accommodate two cocks at once in a double-penetration scenario; shes a girl whos decided that if money comes without orgasm, so much the simpler for her; and no matter how many cocks are thrown at her in a given scene, shes going to make damn sure she doesnt give a respectable blowjob to any of them. Portrait of a Reviewer Who Loves Sexy, Young, Hungarian Women Who Arent Afraid of a Little Anal Activity, But Is Sick And Tired of Chicks Who Never Cum and Who Think A Headjob Counts as a Professional Sexual Performance.Oh. Well, picture painted, I guess. I know, I knowwho watches a Private film for the blowjobs, anyway? My problem is, unless theres a chick on the boxcover trussed up like a Christmas turkey with a ball-gag in her mouth, porn is pretty much porn to me, and I approach it all with much the same hopes and expectations; to wit, pretty women and great sex.
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Release date: 1/20/2003
Reviewed on: 3/31/2003
Studio: Private
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Starring: David Perry, Mike Foster, Frank Gun, Alberto Rey, Leslie Taylor, Barbarella, Claudia Jamsson, Steve Holmes, Nick Lang, Claudio Meloni, James Brossman, Rita Faltoyano, Dora Venter, Lynn Stone, Toni Ribas, Mandy Bright, Barby, Brenda Logan, Tiffany Diamond, Henriette, Dieter Von Stein
Directed by: Antonio Adamo
Review brief: Its not easy to imagine. A professionally produced feature film, an acclaimed director at the helm, an attractive castit seems ludicrous, impossible, yet Antonio Adamo has done it. Hes managed to make lesbian sex look pathetic. This has nothing to do with taste or preference. Some people like girl/girl, some people dont. Thats never stopped the girls from getting off just the same. No, what Adamos done here, in the conclusion of his Gladiator trilogy, is put on film a visual representation of the sexual chauvinism that preaches a good fuck is all thats standing between a lesbian and real sex. While Lynn Stone and Barbarella moan with heterosexual orgasmic pleasure in the foreground of the movies second scene, a couple of chicks remain interminably locked in a weak, quiet 69 in the background. Adamos close-ups dont add any excitement to the tryst; they merely clarify how unsatisfying it must be. Bad girl/girl is rife in the porn industry, but its rare to find a scene that makes it look quite as pointless as this one does. Pointless, too, is the Roman setting.
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Release date: 2/19/2003
Reviewed on: 3/30/2003
Studio: Private
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Starring: David Perry, Claudia Jamsson, Karl Ben, Nicol, Julia Taylor, Rita Faltoyano, Mick Blue, Bob Terminator, Black Widow, Gina Callesi, Seurine
Directed by: Antonio Adamo
Review brief: I dont want to come across as superficial, but Rita Faltoyano (no offence, Rita) does not have perfect tits. Its a measure of how goofy Privates Big Member is, however, that she is introduced with exactly these words, as a girl with perfect tits. Theyre big, theyre round, and Im sure shes quite proud of them, but didnt anyone notice the protruding mole on her left breast? Akira Fubuki she aint. Minor point? How about this? The story is ostensibly about a whole society forbidden to have sex by a tyrannical leader known as Big Member. In reality, its about a bunch of people who complain about not being able to have sex even as they indulge themselves at every opportunity. Trying to make sense out of the story here is worse than a waste of time because it will only distract you from the sex. Trust me, its a distraction you dont need; youll have your hands full trying to fight through director Antonio Adamos arty photographic shifts. I think Id like this movie if Adamo had shot it straight.
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