Kate's Movie Reviews (42 - page 2)
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/13/1999
Studio: Metro
Review brief: I was expecting some serious hilarity - and all I got were a few laughs. Call me strange, but I was really looking forward to this DVD. What can I say... I love circus freaks! Too bad everything was faker than a goat with a horn glued to its head (the famed barnum & bailey unicorn.)This DVD won't get your rocks off.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/12/1999
Studio: Digital Sin
Starring: Gina Ryder, Daisy Chain, Taylor Moore, Torri, Jewel De'Nyle, Tina Thomas, Amber Michaels, Lena, Maya Divine, Sydnee Steele
Review brief: Well, now I know. All girl does nothing for me. I checked out this DVD because I have a vague memory of really liking Where the Boys Aren't.Anyway there are five scenes, each with a couple of girls. It's not all about finger fucking, as the title would suggest. There are some very attractive, amateur-looking girls. And I appreciate Digital Sin's casting of a woman over thirty - it's nice to see a beautiful, fresh woman who's not right out of high school.One scene turned me on.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/12/1999
Studio: Vivid
Starring: Alexandra Silk, Shay Sweet, Vince Vouyer, Katie Gold, Mr. Marcus, Stephanie Swift, Kelly Jean, Derek Lane, Lexus Locklear
Directed by: Paul Thomas
Review brief: I found this gem in the middle of a festival of bad porn. What a great movie! Alexandra Silk and Vince Voyeur not only do a phenomenal acting job (New Jersey accents and all,) but they continue their great acting right into the sex scenes. Juxtaposing Alexandra's sexual enthusiasm with Lexus' lack thereof clearly displays the difference between an incredible porn star and a pretty face. Lexus actually plays the perfect role in this movie - a primadona.The plot is a typical mobster movie plot except that instead of cheating at cards or other business ventures, all the activity takes place in the bedroom (or in the men's bathroom in one case.) The dialogue is really funny and not because it's bad, but because it's clever.I've read a lot of reviews that call the sex good but not great. I have to completely disagree. There is some lame sex (when Lexus tries to take on Mr Marcus she doesn't do justice to his prowess, but then Alexandra steps in and energizes the scene.) Vince and Stephanie Swift have some truly remarkable sex in a casino bathroom.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/12/1999
Studio: Heatwave
Starring: Allysin Chaynes, Brandon Iron, Brian Surewood, Annabel Chong, Tyce Bune, J.J. Michaels, Jay Ashley, Gwen Summers, John West, Mazzi, Delta, Mark Wood, Pat Myrna, Johnny Trust
Directed by: Jim Powers
Review brief: Let me just say straight off the bat if you like watching blowjobs you'll like Kelly the Coed a lot more than me. What's great about this movie is what's obvious on the cover - cute, young girls with real breasts in white panties. The plot is more of a setting than an actual plot - i.e. they're in college. They have sex in dorms and a frat house. The dialogue is so bad it's comicalKelly: Are you going to the frat party tonight?Friend who likes sucking many dicks at once: Yeah, when's the party?The DVD is packed with extras. I wasn't a big fan of "I Love You: Suck My Dick," - the performers weren't very attractive and I'm just not into watching blowjobs. But the behind the scenes was great. Make sure to watch it after the movie, though.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/10/1999
Studio: Digital Playground
Starring: Jeanna Fine, Steven St. Croix, Alex Sanders, Tony Tedeschi, Lana Sands, Rebecca Lord, Tera Heart, Jenna Jameson, Dallas (ambiguous)
Directed by: Michael Zen
Review brief: Normally comedy in porn means acting so bad it's laughable. Not so in this wonderful film. Blue Movie is not only a parody on porn itself, but also makes amusing references to mainstream movies. Remember the briefcase in Pulp Fiction, which if I remember correctly was also in Kiss of the Spider Woman? Well, Blue Movie has a clamshell that emits that same dangerous light. Men melt into nothingness if they look into the clamshell that deviously whispers "Pussy Power. Pussy Power." I'm slapping my knee just writing about it.Stephen St. Croix's quarky role as cross-dressing director makes the movie. He stays in character even during sex scenes. And best of all he wears a chiquita banana fruit hat around the set one day.I know you're waiting for me to start talking about Jenna. But the Jenna look just isn't my style. And the blue ball - what's with the blue ball? I must be shallow 'cause I have no idea.Michael Zen made one heck of a masterpiece here. I'd give it a five if the sex were as extraordinary as the movie. The sex is good just not as phenomenal as the movie.Blue Movie is porn with wit.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/8/1999
Studio: NuTech
Starring: Eric Edwards, Merle Michaels, Christie Ford, Bambi Woods, David Morris, Arcadia Lake, Rikki O'Neal, Georgette Sanders, R. Bolla, Herschel Savage, Jake Teague, Robin Byrd, David Pierce, Kasey Rodgers, Ben Pierce, Tony Mansfield, Jenny Cole, Paul Hughs, Peter Lerman, Debbie Lewis, Steve Marshall
Directed by: Jim Clark
Review brief: The Original Debbie Does Dallas is far more of a movie than the modern versions, which like many of todays pornos are essentially a gallery of sex scenes strung together with a semblance of a plot. The Original very much plays on the innocence factor. The young, perky high school cheerleaders offer their services to their teachers and bosses in order to raise money (seems like theyre always trying to raise money.) The sex is a fulfillment of that teenage girls screwing older men fantasy. Oh Mr. Greenfield, Im not that kind of girl Oh my Mr. Greenfield, youre so big! The girls are all very attractive with wonderfully natural bodies. If you like looking at small, round breasts over and over again this is the movie for you.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/8/1999
Studio: NuTech
Starring: John Holmes, Susan Hart, Gene Clayton, Eric Evol, Wilt Torrance, Bernard Addison, Carrie Welton, Wynne Colburn, Bert Willis, Tracy Valdis, Joseph Lopez, Justin Mallory, Fifi Aldercy, Shell Seward, Jack Aldis, Lesllie Bovee
Directed by: Stanley Kurlan
Review brief: Eruption, a 1978 film starring Holmes and Leslie Bovee, shot on location in Hawaii, is the perfect example of Holmes the actor (instead of just Holmes the big, wonderful cock.) As with other classic porno, Eruption had a complete plot intermingled with hot sex. The story was very Magnum PI-like, and not just because it was filmed in Hawaii. Holmes plays an insurance sales guy who helps Bovee kill her husband to collect on a life insurance policy. The movie has plot twists and exciting moments that don't involve sex (seriously.)You get to watch the Holmes' penis rise to the occasion over and over again -these are captivating moments -getting this man hard is a slow, sensual process.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/8/1999
Studio: Vivid
Starring: Michael J. Cox, Alexandra Silk, Ian Daniels, Candy Hill, Kyle Stone, Sharon Kane, Dee [II] (classic female), Janine Lindemulder, Lilli Louise, Azlea, Steve Taylor [I], James Bonn, Heaven Leigh, Paul, Veronica, Sergio, Frank Towers, Regan Starr, Lola [I] (ambiguous), Devin Wolf, Dominique Dewitt, Rhiannon, Johnny Peters, John Lee, Mann, Eric Star, Ava Vincent
Directed by: Robyn Dyer
Review brief: Seven Deadly Sins really is made for DVD. It is cut into seven loosely associated sex scenes perfect for the easy access of a chapter menu. Viewing sequentially is totally unnecessary its more of an erotic anthology than a film with a story line. The concepts behind each scene/sin are expressed through unique sexual depictions. The sex is definitely not your ordinary porno sex. One scene is a wild food orgy, another a gorgeous threesome in a house of mirrors (talk about multiple angles.) I cant say that I loved every scene, but you get four hours of Vivid girls: seven sex scenes in the feature and a ton of extras. To top it off Vivid put it all on one side of a disc.Seven Deadly Sins will peak your interest and a lot more. The performers, male and female, are very attractive (thank you Vivid for casting James Bonn.) The execution is not perfect, but will exceed your porn expectations. Seven Deadly Sins can cross that line into mainstream because it took porn and made it erotic.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/8/1999
Studio: I-Candy
Starring: John Holmes, Marilyn Chambers, John Leslie, Jesie St. James, David Morris, Richard Pacheco, Mike Ranger, Joan Turner, Robert Pennard, Serena [II] (classic)
Directed by: Godfrey Daniels
Review brief: Wow. Insatiable is the first classic porno Ive seen and it truly is classic. After watching this movie beginning to end (a porno rarity) I felt compelled to tell all of you how phenomenal it is. The increasing intensity portrayed so well by Marilyn Chambers mirrors the increasing intensity of a fist gripping, teeth clenching, heart pounding roll in the hay. The plot and the sex intermingle like a sensual story rather than a series of action sequences. Insatiable is more than a porno -its a finely constructed, very erotic movie (not to mention the groovin soundtrack.)The initial sex scenes arent even really sex scenes -lots pleasing and teasing, no cum shots. Marilyn does a lot of masturbating while fantasizing which grows increasingly passionate as the film progresses (culminating in an unbelievable scene with John Holmes -seeing him in action gives porn a whole new meaning.)The DVD quality is excellent. You can tell it is an old film by speckles here and there. But the image and the sound are both crisp. The audio commentary is interesting as are the bio and stills of Marilyn.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/8/1999
Studio: Digital Playground
Starring: Billy Glide, Tom Byron, Leanni Lei, Raylene, Shawna, J.J. Michaels, Rick, Amber, Alec, Julian St. Jox, Oliva Tye
Review brief: Five sex scenes -each being the fulfillment of the girl's fantasy. But as far as I'm concerned the first scene might as well be removed. It is a half-assed fulfillment of the girl's fantasy - and she's an average looking dead fish.Onto better things: each scene begins with Professor Mike interviewing the girl, she tells him her fantasy, then she masturbates as clips of her fantasy are spliced in. All of the fantasies are pretty run of the mill (pick up an 18yr old on the street, screw him, toss him out the door - screw two guys while my boyfriend watches, etc.)Leanni Lei rocks. I'd be happy to see her in every gonzo flick. She's always smiling -and is naturally beautiful. Too bad JJ is her 18 year old 'cause I really would have liked to see her show some amateur guy what to do.Raylene is also hot. Though her boobs are too much for me (I keep running into this problem.)If I had started watching this disc in the middle my opinion might be different.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/8/1999
Studio: Digital Sin
Starring: Brick Majors, Ian Daniels, Peter North, Julie Meadows, Inari Vachs, Chris Cannon, Gina Ryder, Shaena Steel, Jewel De'Nyle, Tina Thomas, Jenny McCarthy
Review brief: If it weren't for the fact that most of the guys in this movie are attractive I would lower the overall rating to 2. But out of 5 sex scenes there is only one so-so guy (Chris Canon, I think.) Peter North just gets better looking with age (in a Harrison Ford kind of way.) And Ian Daniels is completely unassuming -very cute.Anyway -if you like serious facials you'll love this movie. Peter North is the king. I'm not a big Jewel De Nyle fan though (tits way too big) -so the scene where he worships her just made me wonder why.There are some very cute, young girls. But I think most of 'em are wearing too much make-up.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/4/1999
Studio: VCA
Starring: Jill Kelly, Tom Byron, Christy Canyon, Peter North, Ginger Lynn, Amber Lynn, Sharon Mitchell, Carolyn Monroe, Victoria Paris, Joey Silvera, Ron Jeremy, Nina Hartley, Marc Wallice, Georgina Spelvin, John Holmes, Marilyn Chambers, John Leslie, Erica Boyer, Eric Edwards, Vanessa Del Rio, Seka, Constance Money, Lesllie Bovee
Review brief: Top 25 Adult Stars of All Time is really an excellent DVD to make part of your collection. It provides an overview of all the eras of porn, from the golden age of xxx theater to today's adult video. The whos who of porn stars is clearly detailed. I found the Jill Kelly, Jim Holiday narration somewhat annoying, but you get 25 of the best sex scenes of all time. On how many DVDs do you get 25 full sex scenes? I was immediately pleased with this DVD when the first scene turned out to be my favorite ever: when Marilyn Chambers 'loses her virginity' in Insatiable. Second comes another incredible scene - the utterly orgasmic Insatiable finale with Holmes and Chambers. Top 25 stars introduced me to a lot of porn I wouldn't have otherwise seen. And definitely led to a lot of purchases. The menu functionality had much to be desired.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/4/1999
Studio: Digital Playground
Starring: Kelsey Heart, Brandon Iron, Chris Cannon, Azlea, Anita Cannibal, Charlese LaMour
Review brief: While the sex is hot and the performers are attractive, there are only three sex scenes. The chapter menu is broken down into a ridiculous number of 'scenes' considering there are only three. This makes it difficult to jump to your favorite scene. The run time is 70 minutes - so the scenes aren't short. The opening cheerleader is highly annoying. She should just shut up and fuck. Thanksfully she does. The second scene is the kind I like. The older more experienced woman teaches the innocent girl all about pleasure. Too bad the only woman is too pornstar looking. The younger one is fresh and hot. Both do a great job playing their teacher student roles. While you don't get a lot of bang for your buck, the movie definitely turned me on. So if you can get a good deal go for it.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/4/1999
Studio: Metro
Starring: Nick East, Dyanna Lauren, Tianna, Alex Sanders, Mike Horner, Brad Armstrong, Roxanne Blaze, Lacy Rose
Directed by: Paul Thomas
Review brief: Justine 2 is a perfect couple's movie. Roxanna Blaze is naturally beautiful (no 'enhancements') and the sex is real sex, not porno sex. The plot is decenlty played out (Roxanne is seeing both father and son.) The major flaw with this movie is Tianna. Some people seem to think she's hot. I thought she was nasty, and not in the good way. And her scenes disrupt the development of Roxanne's love triangle.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/4/1999
Studio: Metro
Starring: Lene Hefner, Brooke Lane, Devin Wolf, Helena, Anna Romero, Grace Harlow, Sasha Vinni, Gina LaMarca, Nikie St. Gilles, Kevin James, Antonio Valentino, Drew Reese, Jon Severini
Directed by: Philip Mond
Review brief: Zazel: The Scent of Love is a beautiful, surreal piece of erotica. The interesting cinematography, creative makeup, and vibrant colors make it much more than a porno. Once I said that if ever a porno were a painting, Zazel it is (and the painter would be the child of Georgia O'Keefe and Hieronymous Bosch.) Most of the scenes are shot outdoors in a tropical jungle landscape. Without giving away too much of the visual intrigue, one of the scenes begins as a close-up of the inside of flower. The flower starts twitching as the camera zooms out. Upon further zooming it becomes clear that this flower is the painted clit of a woman. A few porn star type women disrupt the very unique appearance of Zazel.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/4/1999
Studio: Metro
Starring: Anita, Monika, Kristina, Czilla, Andrea, Judith, Katy, Olivia, Sonia, Karina, Eniko, Hoyni, Nelly, Gaby, Agnes
Review brief: It's a real gonzo -cameraman talks to performers before the scene -goes to each of their 'homes'. For once the men are attractive (90 of em) -and most of the women are very hot (fresh faces.) They are all either faking accents or they are truely European. My problem with the chics is the excessive make-up in some scenes -but no biggie. I guess I'd prefer a bunch of people in the woods frolicking in streams, completely natural. Anwyay -There is lots of foreplay and hot sex. I definitely recommend this for a fuck flick (not sure how else to say that.) Although I thought the cameraman was lame (the one in Pornostar was way better.) There are 7 scenes. and once again excellent menus from Metro. I didn't even check out the extras because I don't consider stills from the movie I just watched 'extra' and the trailers were on the flip side of the disc.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/4/1999
Studio: Metro
Starring: Kelsey Heart, Claudia Chase, C.K. Blade, Julian, Alec Metro, Mark Davis, Jake Steed, Vince Vouyer, Earl Slate, Taylor Moore, Melanie Stone, Heaven Leigh, Torri, Cherry Mirage
Review brief: I don't like writing reviews on movies I don't like -so I'll keep it short. I count two young girls out of 5 sex scenes. Audio, what audio? I've never sat through such a silent porno -no talking at all. Almost every scene opens to a blowjob. The sex scenes are long -too much of the same. Even if I hadn't had sex for weeks I wouldn't be turned on by this porno. I guess I like talking. I was also hoping for young, fresh girls. On the plus side -Metro makes great menus -simple, easy to use. The chapter index is perfect -when you highlight a scene it animates, when no highlighted it's a still shot. And before each scene they list the performers -nice touch. The opening is hysterical.
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Release date: 4/24/2000
Reviewed on: 12/4/1999
Studio: Legend
Starring: J.J. Michaels, Katie June, Vivi Anne, Charmaine, Leah
Review brief: Currently, my favorite pure sex movie. I don't know anyone whoe doesn't love this flick. Very beautiful, natural, young girls. Maybe the most attractive/ freshest I've seen in a porno. Camera angles are excellent - the guy is basically kept off the screen except for his dick(which is a good thing considering the men involved.) The girls all appear to love the sex - they smile throughout.The DVD is cut into four hot scenes.
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