X-Men XXX: An Axel Braun Parody Review

Reviewed by fu_q  on  11/12/2016

**Note – This review is based upon the web version of the film streaming at Vivid.com. As such, any bonuses haven’t been given a rating, and there could be some discrepancies between this version and other releases.**

Review:
Despite the fact that a potential team member, Rogue (Allie Haze), has been taken captive by the power-hungry Magneto, who's hell-bent on both world domination and destroying humankind, the mutant powerhouse team, the X-Men, continues to fuck and suck their days away. Such is the case in "X-Men XXX", an overall-good, Axel Braun parody of the popular Marvel property for Vivid Video. Starring an all-star cast including the lovely Ms. Haze, Skin Diamond, Katie St. Ives, and Chanel Preston, along with solid costuming and sets, this film will certainly satisfy the wet dreams of many a comic book geek (such as myself). It's also clear that Braun and company are aware of the comics' contents themselves, as a good understanding of the source material is evident throughout. Similarly, the sex is equally strong, which should come as no surprise given the cast. Indeed, the only true drawback to this flick comes in the area of its plot. As with some other releases in its genre (and, specifically, its line), this production begins to develop a storyline but concludes long before it's either fully fleshed out or even finished. While this may serve to build anticipation for the next chapter, it's dubious as to when the next chapter will actually arrive, if ever at all. So, in essence, what one finds here is a good fuck-flick with a partial plot and plenty of costumed sex. Whether that's enough to satisfy more diehard fans is honestly difficult to tell. For me, this one's still worth a watch...just don't expect the full-feature-level entertainment that some companies (occasionally) deliver.

In terms of the sex, Scene One finds the African street urchin and weather-wielding enchantress, Storm (Skin Diamond), making a payday out of Alec Knight in a small, in-town tent. For $100, she takes him orally, vaginally, and anally--looking awesome in her white wig all the way along--until he delivers a facial. In Scene Two, Magneto (Tom Byron) lays out both his henchwoman, the White Queen (Jeanie Marie Sullivan), and their mutual captive, the stunning Rogue (Allie Haze), back at their concrete-laden lair in the Canadian woods. Both ladies take the "D" orally and vaginally, and there's some girl-on-girl action, as well, before the good times come to a close with a double-facial that lands mostly upon Sullivan. Of course, Allie helps with the clean up. Scene Three brings together the redheaded Jean Grey (Andy San Dimas) in her full-on, green-and-gold Phoenix outfit with her guy, Cyclops (J. Jay), in the locker room at Professor Xavier's mansion. Oral and vaginal action ensues, with a spurting facial for Phoenix finishing off the festivities. In Scene Four, the playful Kitty Pryde (Katie St. Ives) walks through the wall of the steel-tough (literally) Russian's, Colossus' (Billy Glyde's), quarters at the mansion and sprawls herself out seductively on his thickly-wooden bed. Despite some initial hesitation, Glyde's quickly "up" for the good time that she offers, and the pair pounds it out orally and vaginally upon the mattress. Billy's Russian accent here is amusing (RIP), and St. Ives looks as awesome as always. A facial and an apparent swallow cap off this cross-continental, carnal caper. Scene Five has Wolverine (Tommy Gunn) chancing upon the equally ambivalent Polaris (the green-tressed Chanel Preston) in a lab setting. Realizing that, in many ways, they're kindred spirits, they opt to get down to fucking...which is what all kindred spirits do, of course. A steamy oral and vaginal affair follows, with the lovely Ms. Preston's face ultimately slopped up with mutie jizz. Hot stuff all around!