To Steal a Kiss Review

Reviewed by astroknight  on  5/11/2002

Running Time: 88 min. (cover stats approx. 90 min.)

Production Date: 5 / 18 / 2001 (cover) 12 / 3 / 2001 (DVD)

Director: Nicholas Steele

Cast: Kylie Ireland, Adriana Sage, Zana, Kaylynn, Billy Glide, Chris Cannon, Cheyne Collins, Kyle Stone, Lee Stone, and Tony Tedeschi in sexual roles and Frank Fortuna and Nicole London in non-sex roles

Initial Expectations: This one looks like it could be fun, and Adam & Eve’s Premium Collection titles are normally worthwhile.

Initial Reaction: It’s kind of hit or miss throughout the feature, but luckily there’s more hits than misses.

Who Should Watch It : Fans of the stars and anybody who doesn’t want to think during their porn

Who Should Avoid It: Anybody who pays attention to plots or who wants either very tame or very nasty sex

Audio /Video Quality: As seems to becoming a standard for Adam & Eve’s releases, the audio leaves quite a bit to be desired. It’s slightly unbalanced, with the voice over being clear and at a nice level, while the dialogue in the movie is on the low side and frequently hard to hear. It’s also dubbed in a few spots. In a great move in the opposite direction,To Steal a Kiss is presented in anamorphic widescreen. It’s done fairly well, but often feels like Mr. Steele isn’t used to shooting for a widescreen presentation. The widescreen format can be good or bad. Done right, it gives you a feel for a bigger picture, which is great. Done wrong, it feels like the top and bottom of the screen were cut off. Unfortunately, To Steal a Kiss gives you the latter feeling much more than the former. On the plus side, there are very few shadows and the picture is very clear.

Music: Saint provides the music, which is very common on Nicholas Steele’s features, and one of the things I like best about them. Saint is one of the best composers of music for adult films out there right now, and almost always raises the scenes up a notch for me. Unfortunately, this time out Saint’s score didn’t do much for me. Almost all of the score sounded like your typical dance beat that’s become the standard for so much porn rather than the cool, artistic, new age feel that most of his music has.

Menus: The main menu has some nice animation to give a good first impression, which is pretty standard for Adam & Eve’s Premium Collection DVDs. The chapter menu is pretty standard, letting you choose a scene based on a small clip of the scene and a scene number, but also offers you the ability to jump directly to the pop shot.

The Feature: Ahhhh. Girls with guns. Just what every guy wants, or should want, which makes the cover on To Steal a Kiss a great selling point. By the time the opening credits are done, you’re going to know almost the entire plot. Kylie Ireland, Adriana Sage, and Zana rob a truck and get a suitcase full of money, which of course leads to them throwing it around while stripping off their clothes, and probably celebrating as porno watching guys like best. They don’t get away with their crime freely, and end up on the run, where there’ll probably be more fucking and sucking.

Nurse Adriana Sage starts things out with her doctor husband Billy Glide in the alley behind the hospital. As Billy kisses Adriana on the mouth and nipples, while also playing with her pussy, they’re caught in a rainstorm. They strip out of their wert clothes and keep going with Adriana moving down to suck Billy’s cock soon after the rain starts. Billy turns Adriana around for a good tonguing, which unfortunately is only shown from a fair distance, before starting to fuck her from behind. Adriana also props her leg on Billy’s shoulder so he can see her pretty face as he fucks her before dropping to her knees to take his spooge shower on her face. It’s a very warm scene that has an artistic and romantic feel to it. There appears to be some decent chemistry between Adriana and Billy, and it’s done slowly and with a wide range of camera angles which sometimes worked for me and sometimes didn’t. Okay, I realize this is a minor complaint, but it’s a problem that jumped out at me almost immediately. About the only time you see the rain is on the distance shots. The close-ups look to have been done at a different time since Adriana’s hair looks almost completely dry in the close-ups but soaked in the distance shots. The only sign of rain in the closer shots are a little glistening on Adriana and Billy’s body, and once the fucking starts they seem to dry off very quickly and there’s no sign of rain.

Next, Zana tells Kylie Ireland and Adriana Sage about how she caught her husband, Cheyne Collins, cheating on her with Kaylynn in the bathroom of a fancy restaurant. They strip down and Cheyne dives his tongue into Kaylynn’s twat. Although not happy about the situation, Zana also wasn’t too upset and starts playing with herself while listening to her unfaithful husband getting his knob gobbled by Kaylynn. Cheyne goes back to work on Kaylynn’s pussy before she turns around and takes his cock in her twat. Kaylynn also rolls onto her back for Cheyne to fuck her before getting down to take any incriminating evidence into her mouth. It’s a pretty hot scene where you can tell everybody’s into it. At least, I assume everybody’s into it. You don’t see Cheyne’s face through much of the fucking, but Kaylynn appeared to be giving him some good eye contact through much of the fucking which makes me think they were both really into it. Having Zana masturbate while listening also added some nice heat, and it was nice to see that when she started to get vocal she knew enough to leave and that her moans did not go unnoticed.

Kylie Ireland goes after scumbag Tony Tedeschi next, figuring the best way to find something about him is to walk into his mansion looking really slutty and ready to fuck. She lets Tony work his way across her tits, which are one of the best augmented sets out there, and then work over both her completely shaven pussy and ass with his tongue. Tony continues to play with Kylie’s holes as she bends over to suck his schlong until she gets on her knees in front of him. Kylie moves up to ride Tony and then turns around to let him fuck her from behind. Kylie rolls onto her back for a little missionary action, and lets Tony give her pussy a good hard pounding. She talks dirty to him through much of the missionary, which gives it an extremely hot ending, right up to Tony decorating Kylie’s chest. As usual with Kylie, it’s a very hot scene with a lot of energy. I’m surprised she didn’t take it in the ass, but the scene is great even without watching Kylie get her ass stretched.

Kylie, Adriana, and Zana roll around naked in the money next. Kylie is the first to get treated, with Adriana and Zana teaming up to lick her snatch. Adriana moves into the middle, so she can both give and receive before the toys come out. Zana gets the first toy treat before Adriana moves back so she can eat Kylie while Zana fucks her from behind. It’s a fairly hot scene, that has some great chemistry, but the ending is horrible and feels completely cut off. It’s too bad, since it was a very hot scene up to the ending, which sent it sailing down a few notches.

After robbing them, Kylie tries to ensure that armored truck guards Kyle Stone and Chris Cannon keep quiet after using a “make love not war” technique on them. She has Kylie lick her pussy while Chris sucks her tits. She moves things on nastily by having the guys skip her pussy and go straight to having her ass fucked from behind by Chris, and then moving to her back so Kyle can have a turn before finishing things with a nice double facial. Although I really love Kylie as a performer, this scene doesn’t do her much justice. The entire thing feels like it’s been cut and pasted together to make a decent scene length when it should really be about a quarter as long as it is. I know that sometimes different cameras capture the same act, so the dialogue may feel repeated, but here it looked like this was done as well as re-using the same camera angles over and over again. It really gave the scene a cheap and poorly done feel that left a bad taste in my mouth for the feature.

Zana finishes things up with construction worker Lee Stone in her bank office. She gets on the desk for him to lick her slit and then trades places with him so she can swallow his schlong, as well as give it a little tittie-fucking. She finally gets onto her back on the desk, and gives her best imitation of what a car starter sounds like turning over, as one star put it, while taking it in each of her holes. Lee finishes things up spraying down Zana’s tits while holding her hair so she can’t take it on her face. Zana looks like a child who’s just been denied her greatest treat as Lee’s spunk arrives on her chest, and then sucks out the last few drops and licks it off her chest to swallow down. It’s a hot scene that’s a great finish to the feature. It’s almost enough to make me forget about the problems in the previous scene.

To Steal a Kiss is fun, but not always in the way I think it was meant to be. The plot is kind of fun, but often so laughable that it’s almost insulting to anybody who pays the slightest attention to it. The sex is very good, and all three girls do a great job in their scenes. Not surprisingly, Kylie Ireland really heats things up in two of her scenes and reminds me why she’s been one of my favorite performers for so many years. Zana isn’t far behind in her scenes, and turns up the volume a bit in each of her scenes. Unfortunately, some of the scenes feel really poorly done, such as Kylie’s final scene, and there’s some obvious continuity problems that are bad enough that it gave me a feeling that Mr. Steele dismissed them with an excuse of “Who cares. It’s just porn.”, which is an attitude I rarely get form him, especially after hearing some of his comments about some of the things he’s been doing since he’s heard that people like and want certain things. It makes To Steal a Kiss a kind of odd mix that’s a little above average, but not much.

Extras: In addition to the standard bios for Adriana Sage and Kylie Ireland, Adam & Eve has included interviews with Zana, Chris Cannon, and Lee Stone. The interviews last between four and ten minutes, with the stars talking about how they got into the business, their hobbies, favorite positions, their sexual fantasies, and their future plans. Trailers are included for X Professionals, Raging Lust, A Devil’s Tail,Beauty & The Bitch, and Naked Hollywood 5: Twisted. Adam & Eve’s Sex Reel is included, which is about an eleven minute look at many of Adam & Eve’s movies cut together. The photo gallery includes twenty four photos that are first shown as smaller pictures, or thumbnails. As you select them, they blow up to near full screen size.

The first bonus scene comes from The Third Eye with April and Dale DaBone is also included. They skip the foreplay stuff and get right to the fucking with Dale pounding away on her from behind. Dale stops to eat and finger April’s pussy a little before she hops on him for a ride. April finishes him off with some great head and even manages to take Dale all the way in her mouth a few times before taking him all over her face and in her mouth. It’s a very hot scene, just as I’ve come to expect from April.

The second bonus scene comes from After Midnight and features Ava Vincent, Gina Ryder, and Mark Davis. Ava starts fooling around a little with Gina when Mark walks in to help her with her workout. Gina moves out of the way to watch, and sneaks a vibrator away. It’s almost as if she knew that sex would break out, and wouldn’t you know, soon after Mark’s got his cock in Ava’s moist mouth. Ava sucks Mark’s cock with her normal fantastic finesse before turning around so Mark can lick her holes and finger her pussy. Since she’s already in position, he also slides his cock in while Gina watches and plays with herself, first using her fingers and then the vibe. Ava also lays back on the bench for Mark to fuck her, while Gina moves into position to watch better. Gina finally comes over to join in, and sits on Mark’s face as Ava rides his cock so she can suck on Ava’s tits. Since Ava put all the work into it, she gets the full brunt of Mark’s spooge spray on her tits to end things. It’s a pretty hot scene, although I would have liked to have seen Gina and Ava get involved a bit more.

Finally, there’s an eighteen minute behind the scenes featurette, which is almost one of the best I’ve seen from Adam & Eve. There’s several interviews with the cast, as well as showing the scenes being shot and what’s happening away from the main cameras. Unfortunately, most of the interviews are hard to hear and highly unbalanced. This causes much of the behind the scenes to be almost unwatchable, as either you have to put your head right next to the speakers to be able to hear it, or crank it up to the point that speaker distortion will probably kill the clarity, leaving you right back where you started. Rather than coming out as one of Adam & Eve’s best behind the scenes, which it would have been if I could have heard it, it comes off about like somebody shooting blanks.

Themes: Straight, inter-racial, rimming (male > female), voyeurism, masturbation, lesbian, group, toys, anal, and tit-fucking

Raincoat Factor: Medium high

Condom Usage: 100%

Overall: Most of Adam & Eve’s Premium Collection titles can normally be found online for between $15 and $25 with several stores offering them for under $20. At the low end, it’s a pretty good buy. The movie’s not bad sexually, but the rest almost insulted me. It also has some audio problems which is appearing to be a standard problem with Adam & Eve’s features. On the plus side, there’s some nice extras including a nice behind the scenes featurette.

Note to Adam & Eve: Please slap whoever is doing your audio mastering with something like the bumper of a cement truck at sixty miles per hour. The video was almost perfect here, but the low audio quality held you back from a technical rating that quite possibly would have been a 5, knocked a full point off of the extras because I had to put too much effort into trying to hear it, and a full point off the overall rating. This is sloppy, and a problem that odds are, will probably get people to look past your product and buy somebody else’s.

If you have any questions or comments, please e-mail me .

Other reviews by Astroknight