Teenage Cruisers (VCX) Review

Reviewed by fu_q  on  12/16/2015

**Note – This review is based upon the web version of the film released at www.gamelink.com. As such, any bonuses haven’t been given a rating, and there could be some discrepancies between this version and other releases.**

Review:
It's just another wacky day and tacky night in a sex-crazed, 1970's American city in "Teenage Cruisers", an overall-good, oddball release from director Johnny Legend ("The Rockabilly Rasputin") and VCX. Featuring an escaped, havoc-wreaking nymphomaniac (Christine DeShaffer), a pair of horny young women (Lynne Margulies and Serena) cruising around town in search of a just-back-from-'Nam boyfriend, and more comedic, kink-bent Americana than you can shake your dick at, this flick is certainly a trip (...albeit a trippy one...) down memory lane. Indeed, its campy carnality serves up a comical slice of life from its era (...which is probably its biggest draw for contemporary audiences...), all topped off with the likes of a massage parlor whorehouse ("Trixie's"), a crazy creep who drives around town audio-taping private conversations, youngsters cruising the boulevard looking for lust, and so on. There's even a bit of implied bestiality (a girl and her dog in a car and a "donkey show" stag flick at "Trixie's") and a well-attended "nude bake-off", which devolves into a food fight between its pair of brunette and blonde participants. While its offerings are most definitely sex-light, and its plot is unique though uncomplicated, there's still a lot to be found in this fun, fast-paced, rockabilly-fueled fuck-flick from yesteryear. For the correct, camp-seeking and nostalgically naughty crowd, this film is recommendable. For those interested in a "true" porno to jerk off to, it's definitely not.

In terms of the sex, three brunettes (including Carmen Olivera and Starlyn Simone) get it on orally and vaginally with a couple of dudes in a poolside porking (pop on a backside and via a suck-and-jerk into one of the ladies' mouths). Lynne Marguiles' blonde, onscreen sister blows a dude and jerks him off onto her chest in her room whilst Lynne and Serena, who's reduced to stripping down and masturbating (softcore), listen in with cups at the door. Christine DeShaffer captures a pervy professor (Bill Margold) and has her wanton way with him, as well (softcore sex, hard oral, dildo use on / by Christine, and a blowjob to a pop in her mouth). Serena finds her long-lost boyfriend (John Galt) and softcore fucks him to an intentionally ridiculous (...and ridiculously long...), lotion-spurting "cum-shot" in the back of a van. A brunette in a barn--as part of a stag flick at "Trixie's"--feeds, grooms, and gets frisky with her donkey. She strips down, falls back on a pile of hay, and gives the beast a "come hither" motion. A black-socked Kelly Guthrie poetically pokes a brunette in another softcore stag clip at "Trixie's", and Christine blows and bangs a saxophone player backstage at a rockabilly concert. Cheesy fun and not-so-wholesome goodness all around!

Call me crazy, but I really like this film. (I know that I'm in the minority, but I don't care...)