Santa Monica Place Review
VCACast
Studio: VCA
Category: Gay
Starring: Tanner Reeves, Devyn Foster, Billy Roberts, Scott Baldwin, Kyle Davis
Released on: 8/22/2002
joeblow69's ratings for this movie:
|
|
||||||||||||||||
Reviewed by joeblow69 on 10/20/2002
|
Director: Ric Bradshaw
Hint: Do yourself a favor and skip past the opening credits. Someone actually wrote a theme song for this mess, and it's awful! Spare yourself the pain! Story: I think Santa Monica Place is supposed to be some kind of sendup of Melrose Place. That's just a guess, though, as I've never seen Melrose Place. Basically, some kid moves into a condo, where all his neighbors have lots of sex. Scene One Starring: Tanner Reeves, Greg Erickson Greg is looking for a place to stay, and the Tanner, the assistant manager at Santa Monica Place, agrees to let him say at his pad for a while. After some terrible dialog, the two guys go at it. Unfortunately, I didn't find either one of these guys attractive. They're not bad, but those poofy hair-dos are a deal-breaker for me. Ugh. I guess it does go to show we have made some progress in the last 10 years or so. Tanner ends up topping Greg bent over his desk, but there's no heat here what-so-ever. Scene Two Starring: Devyn Foster, Kyle Davis Luckily, the hair-dos were toned down a bit in this scene. The guys were pretty attractive as well, Devyn looking especially good in his grey undies. After a little oral, Kyle looks at Devyn and says in a completely deadpan voice “I want you to fuck me with your big dick.” Dude, you aren't ordering a cheeseburger, you're begging to get fucked! But some emotion into it! Geez! Devyn obliges, screwing Kyle in a couple of positions before blowing on his stomach. It's all rather “ho-hum”. Watch out for some more killer dialog: Greg: Don't you ever get enough? Tanner: At Santa Monica Place, you can never get enough! Scene Three Starring: Scott Baldwin, Billy Roberts Ok, this one really frustrated me. This scene has got to hold the record for the longest session of foreplay to ever appear in porn. And I'm not talking blowjobs, either. I'm talkin' kissing, and massaging, and grinding, and... Will you people get on with it already!!! Get Naked!! Anyway, once they finally do get naked, it isn't half bad. I think Scott is supposed to be the star of this scene, but I was much more attracted to Billy (even if he looks like he recently had a bad run-in with a tanning machine). Billy seems to really enjoy getting boned by Scott, and Scott blows quite a yummy looking load. As far as budget porn goes, it's a pretty good scene. Scene Four Starring: Tanner Reeves, Scott Baldwin, Devyn Foster I'm sorry, but this has got to be one of the most boring threesomes I've ever witnessed. If there's a saving grace, it's Scott getting fucked by Devyn. For some reason, I thought that Scott was a top only. Still that wasn't enough to keep my attention. I still found myself staring off at the ceiling, counting tiles. Scene Five Starring: Curt Steele, Kyle Davis Two younger studs meet up in the laundry room to talk awkwardly and have sex. That basically sums it up. Yawn. Dicks get sucked and then Kyle gets fucked (again). It isn't horrible, but it's not the sort of thing I would watch on purpose. Audio/Visual Quality The video looks surprisingly good for an older title (I'm guessing this one was made back in the early 90's.) The audio is your standard cheesy porn stuff. It gets the job done, and for the most part, isn't too annoying. Extras There's a good number of previews tacked onto this DVD, including the Joe Gage Trilogy, Idol Country, Jeff Stryker's Underground, Sex Saga, and short little write-ups about Male Tales, Flexx Tv, and Buttboys Black Jack (argh! Stay far away from this one!!!). There's also a short slideshow, for those that are into that sort of thing. Final Word Well, if you couldn't already tell, I wasn't overly thrilled with Santa Monica Place. If I didn't know any better, I would have sworn this was made by Vivid. (Yes, the sex is that lackluster!) It really boggles my mind why HIS would release this on DVD. Surely they have something better in their back catalog? Running Time: 101 minutes Send questions, and comments to: joeblow69@my.adultdvdtalk.com. |
Check Prices for Santa Monica Place
The opinions expressed in this review of Santa Monica Place from VCA are not necessarily the opinions of Adult DVD Talk. Adult DVD Talk provides a public forum for consumers to post their DVD reviews. Adult DVD Talk does not edit these reviews.