Private Gold 26: Tatiana Review

Reviewed by Rieekan  on  6/8/2001

DIRECTOR: Pierre Woodman
PRODUCTION DATE: 1997
DURATION: »120min
FEMMES: Bettina, Caroline, Deborah, Eva (Laura Black), Inga, Jennifer Red, Lydia, Karina, Katalyn, Keri, Myrka, Peggy Sue, Rita, Sarah, Tania Russof & Vanda.

Welcome to Rieekan Review #3. Being a modest fan of retired Russian superstar Tania Russof, I decided to buy a Private DVD directed by her husband, Pierre Woodman. From Rog T. Pipe (www.rogreviews.com), I learned that Mrs. Russof appears in only one sex scene in each third of the acclaimed Pyramid and Tatiana series. Based on his reviews, I chose Tatiana 1 (which he rated 10), which somewhat excessively cost AUD$60.95 (»US$30.50) from www.AdultShop.com.au Despite Private’s reputation, I still can’t justify the outlay … must have been one of my trademark lapses in concentra

STORY SYNOPSIS: Ukraine, 1834. Tania plays the title character, a peasant girl whose family owes the Marquis 1,200 crowns. The movie begins by disseminating Tatiana’s present socio-economic circumstances within the agri-feudalist superstructure, while she is in bed with a pig. Shortly thereafter, she trysts with the Marquis’ nephew in an abandoned castle. Back at home, the Marquis promises to cancel the debt if her sister, Svetlana, is physically charitable to him and his soldiers; Svetlana nobly agrees. Unsurprisingly, the Marquis reneges. Tatiana swears vengeance and plots to avenge her family – naturally, her first stop is a brothel.

The acting is unremarkable, and what little dialogue and story that is conveyed in the voiceover doesn’t impress – you could almost imagine your own storyline. However, the effort put into the production (particularly costumes and settings) is appreciable.

Scene 1 – Tania Russof & a guy. Tania has looked much better elsewhere and her newly implanted breasts are slightly larger but look significantly worse. The guy resembles Hakan. An indifferent sex scene against a piano, nothing exciting or exceptional, just going through the motions. The handycam perspective moved too much for my liking. Tania kneels to jerk him off, and any student of Cumshot Trajectory Physics 1A will not be surprised to see the guy’s load fly aimlessly into the air, missing her face from point blank. Some post-cum head ends a thoroughly ordinary scene.

Scene 2 – Rita, David Perry & 4 guys. Rita is extremely cute and innocent, with nice breasts, a shaved pussy and questionable pink fingernails; she is very believable as Tania’s sister. A standard gang bang with the usual positions – cowgirl, doggy, mish – and the b.j. semicircle. She receives a fairly hard anal pounding with DP and TP, there may have been edited DAP. She takes the cumshots on her pretty face and a drop in her lustrous black hair. The best scene thanks to Rita, who performs well despite being new to porn.

Scene 3 – Vanda, a girl & a guy. The two brunettes in this scene are decent-looking but nothing special. The moustached guy wears his officer’s coat throughout. There aren’t many positions in this average scene, which is rescued only by some CA and RCA. The scene ends with a weak shared facial.

Scene 4 – A redhead & a guy. The attractive redhead wears a bordello outfit that is very hot – corset, stockings and leather boots. She sucks the guy very briefly before he fucks her with his small penis. Some doggy and RCA, which looks good with her stockings and boots, but isn’t well filmed and doesn’t last long. She strokes him to a very poor facial.

Scene 5 – Peggy Sue & a guy. Peggy is a fairly good-looking coffee-skinned girl. She gives some good head briefly; he licks her. Some RC and enthusiastic cowgirl – fairly warm – followed by RCA (this girl likes being on top) with his large cock. She doesn’t take much of him. She sucks and strokes him to a decent money shot. Fair.

Scene 6 – Jennifer Red, a brunette & a large dildo. A darkly lit and oddly coloured scene with some brief anal penetration with the dildo, some clit-licking and a simulated golden shower. Not really a scene but interesting. The bordello madam is very attractive but unfortunately does not feature much.

Scene 7 – Eva (Laura Black) & David Perry. Perry looks disinterested as this good-looking older lady blows him. They mish (he doesn’t even lick her) and proceed through the motions. A weak facial and post-cum head finish.

Scene 8 – Bettina (?), a brunette & a guy. This scene is inter-cut with Eva and David Perry. The three participants aren’t particularly attractive (the black girl has troubling stick-thin arms), but the simultaneous doggy action was alright. The cutting was done well, not criminally distracting (Andrew Blake), and both scenes featured a lot of anal sex. Both girls suck the guy to an average shared money shot. Warm but unimpressive; a stock-standard scene.

TECHNICALITIES: The image quality was ordinary with some blurriness and pixellation. The lighting was needlessly poor in the last 3 scenes and some handheld shots were unstable. The photography wasn’t particularly inspired – there was generally too much movement, indiscriminate body shots and a lack of penetration shots and close-ups. The audio quality was pretty good, though the French dialogue didn’t synch (not that I understand French). The classical background music was a bit loud, but a welcome diversion from regular porn soundtracks!

Extras consist of 5 languages, 4 subtitles, trailer, making of, (limited) biographies, production notes and previews for three other Private features – Operation Sex Siege, The Uranus Experiment and Extreme Desires. The extras were comprehensive and quite impressive, but the voiceover was insufficient and there weren’t English subtitles (I have yet to see multiple angles on a DVD either).

SUMMARY: Easily the best thing about this movie is Rita. She’s a cute girl who has a fair scene ending with 5 decent money shots. You can also appreciate the production values and the thought put into the story. Apart from that, there’s not much to like – Tatiana 1 is simply lacklustre. It suffers from unexciting sex and the cast isn’t remarkably hot in looks or in bed. If you do have a fondness for a particular girl, you’ll only see her in one scene. The broken storytelling detracts (there’s basically no dialogue in the translation) and I found Tania’s scene severely disappointing. There’s no lesbian sex either.

I’m going to give it above average mainly for Rita, but also for the effort in production values, ending every scene with facials even if weak (at least they tried), the 2 hour duration, and not really doing anything wrong – just not doing anything exceptionally well. There’s usually something to keep you watching (medium raincoat factor) and nothing so off-putting to make you stop.

My expectations of Tania, Pierre and Private quality were extremely disappointed. Tatiana 1 is only worth a little over half what I paid, and I have no desire whatsoever to buy the other instalments (Tania’s position on my Top 10 list has also been temporarily suspended). As my copy doesn’t play properly on my DVD-ROM, I very rarely watch Tatiana. Private must also attend to the seriously deficient English voiceover (subtitles would be fine).

However, I’m not totally against Private – I would definitely consider buying (for a reasonable price) anything that features Rita or Tania in more than one scene, and Operation Sex Siege looks very good too.

Rieekan
rieekan@ihug.com.au


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