Kid Sparkle's House Of Freaks Review
Empire
Studio: Empire
Directed by: Kid Sparkle
Starring: Alec Metro, Temptress, Tye, J.J. Michaels, Ron Jeremy, Kid Sparkle, Sindee, Jennifer Leigh, Syren, Mark Spritz, Lilienne Li, Dakota [VIII] (90s female)
Released on: 4/24/2000
dumblonde's ratings for this movie:
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Reviewed by dumblonde on 12/17/2002
Director/Writer: Vamp Pictures & Kid Sparkle
Running length: 1 hr. 45 min
DOP: 9/20/1998
Female cast: Dakota, Jennifer Leigh, Sindee, Liliene Li, Syren, Temptress, Tye
Male cast: Alec Metro, Ron Jeremy, Kid Sparkle, JJ Michaels, Mark Spritz
Audio/Video: A lot of the video is intentionally dark, but the strobe lighting and strange video effects work well to set the mood for this indoor circus. When there was light, it was a little too bright and shadowy, but the sex could be seen all-too-clearly. The audio was fine.
Extras:
It launches right into the movie, bypassing the main menu screen, but pushing your menu button will take you there. You can choose a chapter, a few photo stills, a cumshot recap, and a trailer, which is for the same movie you're watching.
Condoms: Alec and Mark Spritz, yes. JJ Michaels, no.
The Movie:
I'm not a superstitious person. When I saw a greeting card recently that pictured Ron Jeremy dressed in a diaper, I felt fairly safe in requesting that someone put a bullet in my head should I ever again have to see that.
Surely seeing Ron in diapers twice within a month has some deeper meaning. Is it a sign of the Apocolypse? Is Ron suffering from incontinence? Or have I just watched too much porn?
This gets extra points right off the bat just for being different. They went all out with the set, costumes and makeup, although the dialogue could have been better.
The sex was actually pretty standard. Standard for pinheads, Siamese twins, drooling idiots, 300 lb. babies and she-males.
Stranded and Alone, They Thought They Had Found Help. They Never Should Have Knocked On The Door…
Alec Metro and Dakota enter and are drugged at the bar by Kid, who then takes Alec to a cell where a 6 titted girl and a 400 pound female await. I don't know what was in that drink, but he has no problem doing both of them before whacking off into their faces.
Meanwhile Dakota is starting to get aggressive and goes after JJ Michaels like a hungry dog. She pins Pinhead on the floor and rides him hard while verbally abusing him. He doesn't seem to mind though, and eventually is rewarded with a real wet blowjob that results in him popping on her face.
Alec meanwhile has met up with conjoined twins Tye and Temptress, so naturally he does both of them, too. Another facial ending.
Here's where it really gets weird. Ron Jeremy, dressed in a baby bonnet and diaper, is in distress. In comes his mother. I'm assuming it's his mother because who else would have the stomach to change a loaded diaper on the world's hairiest 300 pound baby? She coos and talks baby-talk to him, even as she's telling him how smelly his diaper is. Lady, I can IMAGINE how smelly it is, thank you very much.
After using a baby wipe on him, she notices his wee-wee is hard and starts sucking on it. This kid is a quick learner and soon has mom on her back puttin' the meat to her.
This is truly a depraved, disturbing scene. I loved it.
The next one caught me by surprise too, but for a different reason. I debated about spoiling it, but I suppose I should let you know that it involves a shemale. Which shouldn't bother anyone after that last scene, but this one I never would have guessed. She fucks Syren, even though her cock never gets fully hard. Hormones, I would guess, but it still works. Mark Spritz pokes her before the mandatory facials.
Best lines:
"Fuck me"
"Fuckin A"
"Fuck yeah"
"Fuck me you fuckin freak!!!"
[ /image ] --> 
Running length: 1 hr. 45 min
DOP: 9/20/1998
Female cast: Dakota, Jennifer Leigh, Sindee, Liliene Li, Syren, Temptress, Tye
Male cast: Alec Metro, Ron Jeremy, Kid Sparkle, JJ Michaels, Mark Spritz
Audio/Video: A lot of the video is intentionally dark, but the strobe lighting and strange video effects work well to set the mood for this indoor circus. When there was light, it was a little too bright and shadowy, but the sex could be seen all-too-clearly. The audio was fine.
Extras:
It launches right into the movie, bypassing the main menu screen, but pushing your menu button will take you there. You can choose a chapter, a few photo stills, a cumshot recap, and a trailer, which is for the same movie you're watching.
Condoms: Alec and Mark Spritz, yes. JJ Michaels, no.
The Movie:
I'm not a superstitious person. When I saw a greeting card recently that pictured Ron Jeremy dressed in a diaper, I felt fairly safe in requesting that someone put a bullet in my head should I ever again have to see that.
Surely seeing Ron in diapers twice within a month has some deeper meaning. Is it a sign of the Apocolypse? Is Ron suffering from incontinence? Or have I just watched too much porn?
This gets extra points right off the bat just for being different. They went all out with the set, costumes and makeup, although the dialogue could have been better.
The sex was actually pretty standard. Standard for pinheads, Siamese twins, drooling idiots, 300 lb. babies and she-males.
Stranded and Alone, They Thought They Had Found Help. They Never Should Have Knocked On The Door…
Alec Metro and Dakota enter and are drugged at the bar by Kid, who then takes Alec to a cell where a 6 titted girl and a 400 pound female await. I don't know what was in that drink, but he has no problem doing both of them before whacking off into their faces.
Meanwhile Dakota is starting to get aggressive and goes after JJ Michaels like a hungry dog. She pins Pinhead on the floor and rides him hard while verbally abusing him. He doesn't seem to mind though, and eventually is rewarded with a real wet blowjob that results in him popping on her face.
Alec meanwhile has met up with conjoined twins Tye and Temptress, so naturally he does both of them, too. Another facial ending.
Here's where it really gets weird. Ron Jeremy, dressed in a baby bonnet and diaper, is in distress. In comes his mother. I'm assuming it's his mother because who else would have the stomach to change a loaded diaper on the world's hairiest 300 pound baby? She coos and talks baby-talk to him, even as she's telling him how smelly his diaper is. Lady, I can IMAGINE how smelly it is, thank you very much.
After using a baby wipe on him, she notices his wee-wee is hard and starts sucking on it. This kid is a quick learner and soon has mom on her back puttin' the meat to her.
This is truly a depraved, disturbing scene. I loved it.
The next one caught me by surprise too, but for a different reason. I debated about spoiling it, but I suppose I should let you know that it involves a shemale. Which shouldn't bother anyone after that last scene, but this one I never would have guessed. She fucks Syren, even though her cock never gets fully hard. Hormones, I would guess, but it still works. Mark Spritz pokes her before the mandatory facials.
Best lines:
"Fuck me"
"Fuckin A"
"Fuck yeah"
"Fuck me you fuckin freak!!!"
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The opinions expressed in this review of Kid Sparkle's House Of Freaks from Empire are not necessarily the opinions of Adult DVD Talk. Adult DVD Talk provides a public forum for consumers to post their DVD reviews. Adult DVD Talk does not edit these reviews.