Jamie Loves Jeff Review

Reviewed by vodka tonic  on  5/5/2005

Director : Paul Thomas
Cinematography : Michael Cates
Cast : Jamie Summers, Megan Leigh, Nikki Knights, Erica Boyer, Jeff Stryker, Tom Byron, Kim Alexis (non-sex)
Running Time : 80 mins

DVD Extras : Chapter selection, sex ads

Short Story : Jamie & Jeff used to be the hottest couple in high school, until she dumped him for dorky lawyer Tom and Jeff ended up marrying Megan. 5 years later, at the High School Reunion, the former lovers fall in love all over again, while their respective spouses embark on a little grudge fun of their own.


SCENE BREAKDOWN :

1) MEGAN LEIGH & JEFF STRYKER



Macho man Jeff takes a break from plumbing and beer-guzzling to sex up his wife in the kitchen. "Jeff, don't get so rough", says Megan. Come on, Megan, a little more conviction. Jeff Stryker playing macho is, how can I phrase this, a must-see. Dynamite. His hair never moves. Anyway, pretty vixen Megan eats his thick cock with gusto, then he pumps her on the kitchen stand, first in missionary, then in doggy. This is a scene for the ladies, with an eye-boggling emphasis on Jeff's toned, miniature butt. They finish on the floor (try to spot Megan's body under Jeff) and he comes on her belly.

2) JAMIE SUMMERS & JEFF STRYKER / MEGAN LEIGH, NIKKI KNIGHTS & TOM BYRON



After running, toboggan-ing & laughing at the stars in a public park during a musical interlude (cut the crap, Paul !), Jeff & Jamie finally get down to business at his condo while their respective spouses enroll chain-drinking bitch Nikki for a sneaky threesome at their reunion party. They find an isolated corner on the back of the studio set while Jeff tries to undress Jamie without ruining her hairstyle (we would never do that to a sister). You'd think Nikki & Megan's tryst with Tom would provide visual relief for the straight man, but no, Thomas alternates it with more views of Stryker's butt pumping Jamie in doggy & missionary (try to spot Jamie under Jeff). Still, with f/fw firmly in left hand, the threesome is quite enjoyable, with Nikki receiving first honours in mish, then Megan climbing on Tom before they jack him to a nice pop. Jamie shares her post-shag fag with Jeff, which I guess is highly symbolic.

3) JAMIE SUMMERS & ERICA BOYER



Jamie goes to Dr Suzan, her psychological counsellor, for advice on how to deal with her infatuation with Jeff. The more Jamie describes their lovemaking, the hotter Dr Suzan gets, until she has her face smelling Jaime's pussy. This is very liberal psychotherapy. Erica/Dr Suzan fingers Jamie's twat while Jeff has a man-to-man discussion with Tom (who's the only one who can act here). Back to the girls licking each other's titties, then back to the boys talking. You get the idea. Another case of left-handed remote control. Erica easily dominates the scene with all her dirty-talking and expert finger-fucking, but it's all downplayed by the irritating edits.

4) JAMIE SUMMERS & JEFF STRYKER



Hubby Tom decides to let the ex-lovers have a final go at it, so that Jamie finally gets Jeff out of her mind. Like all early PT movies, it's all pink & orange. The fact that the video transfer smears the colours doesn't help. After lots of kissing & caressing, Jeff delves into Jamie in missionary, with some incredible shots of sweaty male butt thrusting away which should appeal to gay men all around the globe, then they move to cowgirl, where you can see Jamie's own lovely bums & body for a moment before Jeff realizes his tushy doesn't get enough camera time & covers her back to steal the limelight. He comes on her butt. Try to spot Jamie under Jeff.


THE LOWDOWN : It's only fitting that for a High School Reunion, the acting shouldn't go above graduation level. Maybe Rock Hudson could play straight, but Jeff Stryker can't. With abysmal dialogue, cliché romantic interludes and sex scenes that should appeal more to Jeff's fans than to Jamie Summers' straight male audience, "Jamie loves Jeff" is so bad...it's good ! Provided you can find it for a bargain, it channels the same kind of glazed, sick pleasure as a no-budget horror movie. It's cheesy, it's cheap, it's 80's, it's terrible, it's fantastic ! Honestly I don't know who I can recommend this to except people with no taste or pride, which is me and a handful of other sick gay men. If you don't fit that description, rent any of "The Brat" series with Jamie, but if you still want to rent "Jamie Loves Jeff", you twisted sicko, I'll be your slut for life.