Games Men Play Review

Reviewed by Joe Shaver  on  3/7/2003

GAMES MEN PLAY is a 1979 pre-condom flick that has been transferred to DVD. The guys are mostly seventies’ gay clones with mustaches and beards.

It begins with a gang member in a leather jacket picking up a hustler who takes him to a T-room. When they arrive the gang member refuses to pay the hustler and orders him to give him a blowjob. He then rims the hustler and fucks him. Afterward, the gang member sucks off the hustler and eats his cum. Sounds good, huh? Well the camera work is really poor and the lighting is worse. The lighting would be too dark even for film noir. Shadows hide cocks going into mouth and asses. What is worse is the antiquated disco music of women singing. Imagine sucking someone’s cock while women are wailing away on the soundtrack. Boy, does that distract one. And coupled with the bad lighting….

Scene two. Two guys sharing a joint decide to share something else. As soon as the sex starts so does the singing. (The sex ain’t beginning till the fat lady sings!) If I was going to get into this is I had to turn off the sound track, but that didn’t help much.

Scene three seemed to be better. An accountant whom a narrator tells us is always too busy to relieve his sexual frustration turns down a lunch invitation from an attractive lady. When a cute delivery boy arrives my attention begins to rise for the first time. The account is pretty cute and the delivery boy is even cuter. Now if only those banshees don’t start wailing again. But they do! The accountant gives head and the boy makes a rear delivery to the accountant. They didn’t undress so with the crappy lighting I didn’t—uh, the scene didn’t come off.

We now meet a construction worker who is having trouble with his wife. He picks up a hitchhiker with long blond hair. This country boy arriving in the city (cowboy hat and everything) has the keys to a friend’s apartment and invites the construction worker to come up. Deciding to try guys for a change, the construction worker goes down on the yokels’ cock. Oh, Shit! Those chirping women are at it again! Where’s the mute button? (Gays in the seventies had absolutely no taste in music.) The country lad is slim and very, very, very hairy and he fucks the construction worker who leaves his jockstrap on the whole time. Then without any assistance from Country Boy, the construction worker removes his jock, jacks off, and goes back to sucking the cowboy. Which one of these was supposed to be the gay guy?

Hey is this film finally over? Good. There are only three reasons to buy this corny turkey:
1. You are a collector of pre-condom porn (even when its bad)
2. You want to see how poor most of the porn in the 1970’s was
3. You want a film to watch with your friends and laugh your heads off

Oh, the pictures on the cover have nothing whatsoever to do with the film. It’s just one of the “games video companies play”.