Deep Inside Ginger Lynn (VCA) Review

The Plot: Oh boy, that’s a tough one… is there plot on this disc? Well, kind of. There is a plot of sorts, but this really is more of a compilation disc than anything else. There is plot for each scene, but it’s never part of a cohesive whole. It’s like watching the Club Massacre from the beginning of Blade, the boarding of the plane from Passenger 57, and the final inning from Major League on a Wesley Snipes compilation disc. Is there a plot? Sure, but you don’t see much of it. I’m just going to address the plots in the scene breakdown; it’s really not worth it from here.

The Cast: You know, those of us who are old enough to remember the Golden Age of Porn (i.e., old farts like myself) have fond memories for the great stars of the years gone by. These warriors of the sexual age were the few warm bodies who were able to rise above the “tab A into slot B” routine and show us how much fun sex could be. The unsung heroes of our sexual education, they were there in our parents’ closet, in their bottom drawers and under their beds. They helped to guide us through our adolescent times, like a gang of vigilante teachers teaching us Calculus years before our elders wanted us to study curves.

Deep Inside Ginger Lynn is a glimpse back into the Golden Age of Porn when men were men, women were women, hair was teased, breasts were real and plumbers in porn movies got laid all the time. And Ginger Lynn was in her prime. What did Ginger look like back then? She looked like an 18 year old with the body of a succubus and the moves of a horny angel. Or is it the body of an angel and the moves of a succubus? Whatever. Every porn star of note has something they’re very good at, a specific magic of the screen that makes them stay in your mind like that faint scene of perfume you find in the elevator after that hot lady on the third floor comes home from work. Ginger’s magic is that she has hip action. She moves with a sinuous motion that just conjures images of warm, wet lips sliding smoothly around whomever is lucky enough to be within striking distance. It doesn’t matter what position she’s in, those hips are going to have your complete and undivided attention.

Ginger is joined by some other members of the olden days: Blake Palmer, Cindy Brooks, Harry Harwood, Paul Thomas, Shone Taylor, R. Bolla and Tom Byron. And surprise surprise… a slim Ron Jeremy. Ah, how the mighty have fallen… Actually, it’s pretty interesting to watch Ron back in the olden days. As much as it is a fad to make fun of the man he has become, the man he was wasn’t half bad. Alas, VCA has decided that these classic clips are all I need, and I should know everyone by sight. Bullshit. So I’m going to have to guess who currently has their hands on (and in) Ginger. The good news is that she’s in every scene. The bad news is that this is mostly 80s porn, which means that the hairstyles involved will make you think that they comb their hair with a hand grenade. Still, it’s an interesting perspective. I feel like I’m watching Bananarama get laid.

The Sex: : Scene number one is entitled “Plug It In”, a blatant misnomer if I’ve every seen one. What little plot we see brings back fond memories of bad porno plots and ridiculous setups. Basically, the air conditioning repairman pays a call and through some sort of mystical power I can only call “Weak Plot Device”, he has sex with Ginger. Not that I’m complaining. Hell, I’d want to have sex with Ginger, too. This is a great scene to introduce us to our leading lady. She has a good whopping orgasm, and she goes through a couple of positions where she can squirm to great effect. The part where he rides his face is particularly energetic. I’m surprised she didn’t rub some of his features off! I think (no promises) that this is one of her later efforts, as her dialogue delivery is much more natural in this scene that some of the ones that follow. The image is significantly clearer as well. The lighting is pretty inconsistent from cut to cut, but they even it out and it isn’t nearly as obvious in the second half of the scene as it is in the first half. Alas, I don’t know who the gentleman is (Blake Palmer?) but he does fine once he shuts up and whips it out. He’s a bit more hairy than your modern day porn star. I like this scene a great deal, mainly because it shows Ginger in the throws of passion with a throw of those world-class hips. This one looks like an 80s porno. Late 80s, but it is decidedly dated by today’s standards.

Our next entry into the Bad Porn Plot Hall of Fame is “Money For Nothing”, our next scene. Ginger and two of her friends are trying to refill their Winnebago at a country gas station. Alas, the gas station doesn’t accept credit cards, so two of the ladies (Ginger and Cindy Brooks, methinks) decide to distract the attendant while their compatriot fills up the tank. Take a wild guess how two porn stars are going to distract a gas station attendant. Wow, you got it in one guess! Friends will be calling you in thirty days with your prize, a complete box set of Moans of the Porn Stars in B Minor on eight-track tape. I’m not sure who plays the gas station attendant (Harry Harwood, I think) but he looks like Lurch from the Adaams Family. Ginger has by far the most speaking lines, and she really seems to enjoy her work here. I wouldn’t be surprised if she ad-libbed the entire scene beyond the “We want to use your tool” line. The image here is a little better than the first scene, being a step above in lighting and image clarity. Unfortunately, the sex isn’t nearly as good. Ginger and Cindy give the attendant a fairly mediocre tag-team blowjob, and the actual sex is all doggie style. Not really Ginger’s forté. I can only say that this scene was good from a nostalgic point of view (As much as I love to razz the studios about it, the “oh, let’s fuck the gas station attendant for a tank full of gas” plot device has thankfully dwindled by comparison). I wouldn’t even put this one in the middle of the road category by today’s standards. I’d consider it slightly below average for sex, slightly above average for humor. As an interesting aside, there is no cumshot in this scene. Yep, you can tell it’s older porn with the classic plots and situations.

If you are a dirty old man like myself then you’ve had the teacher/student fantasy surface from the depths of your brain like some slithering creature only seen in underwater trenches or Japanese adult animation. Well, this next scene takes that gibbering monster and throws it the equivalent of a Sexual Scooby Snack. Ginger narrates what has to be the lamest plot set-up I’ve heard in years: her boyfriend is on the football team and he got benched because the coach (Paul Thomas, I guess) thinks she’s wearing him out after school. This is a blatant impossibility, because our young cheerleader is a good girl and has never slept with a man. So she gets called into the office to explain herself. Guess what happens. Hey, that’s two for two! You’re on a roll here! You betcha, the coach fucks her in exchange for putting her boyfriend back on the team. What will surprise you is that this scene works. Ginger has some real acting talent and she plays the naïve high school twit to a T. She puts forth a soft, trusting voice and an expression with such a doe-eyed innocence that just makes you want to gently reach out and corrupt it with nut-busting sex. Damn! Also, this scene shows you exactly how slim and young she really was at this point in her career. She looks like a high school cheerleader that hasn’t fully fleshed out yet. I wouldn’t be surprised if this wasn’t one of her first scenes ever, for the print looks terrible. Grain, speckles and the occasional thread are everywhere in this scene. The image is definitely on the soft side and the color saturation is nowhere near modern levels. There were some slight audio problems and the damn music was annoying as hell. It didn’t help that the lyrics were moronic, but they would fade the music out so you could hear some snippet of dialogue, and then start it up from the beginning again. Ah… this is the bad disco porn that I remember so well. Still, I loved this scene as it was a joy to the dark fishies of my evil nature, and watching Ginger’s hip action is always a bonus.

Remember how our first scene started with the air conditioning repairman? Well, in “Dancing Delight”, Ginger wants to sell her house and she has invited the guy over to see the place. Want to take a wild guess what she and the buyer end up doing? Hey, three in a row! You’re good at this! Only in porn is screwing a prospective buyer a good thing. This set-up is the fastest one yet, with Ginger losing the first of her clothing in a record 34 seconds into the chapter and getting her breasts some fresh air at the one minute mark. In my humble opinion, this is the worst looking scene on the disc. Not only does it have the low-contrast look of 80’s porno shoots but they also have slapped a soft focus filter on the camera for the entire scene, making everything appear to have a haze around it. It’s almost like you’re watching porn under water. Top it off with some of the worst audio dubbing I have heard/seen in a long time and there is much to detract from this scene. Hello... you can't speak with a dick in your mouth, Ginger. It's not polite. However, watching Ginger squirm on the end of a tongue is a treat, and she gives a great blowjob as always. There really is nothing special about this scene except for a few minor points: 1) She finishes him off by hand onto the wall mirrors, which is a rather weird effect. 2) She licks his cum off the mirror, which is just weird. 3) She loses all of her clothing except the high heels and leg warmers. Remember leg warmers?

“Campfire Girls” is our next entrant into this nostalgic romp through Ginger’s love muscles and it comes in hard and doesn’t stop. We start with sex. No plot, no intro, no real reason other than they’re out camping in the Winnebago and someone started a fire by putting a bunch of rocks on the ground in a circle. Our very first image is Ginger riding astride someone (Tom Byron?) and absolutely working him over with her hips. Ahhhhh. This is what made her famous, this combination of speed and controlled motion is exactly what turns me on. I am 90% certain that this scene is from the same movie as scene #2 “Money For Nothing”. The same actress that was Ginger’s partner in porn is on the other side of the campfire getting screwed by Ron Jeremy, and the Winnebago of Lust. He’s still as hairy as ever, but you can really see how he earned his reputation in this business. Ginger actually doesn’t have too much screen time in this scene, it is mostly on Ron and his partner. Still, you get some very good sex in here. Image quality is okay, but you can tell that this is some old film.

You know, I’d almost forgotten why I have such bad memories of porn movies. Our next little situation, “Two For One”, is set up so hastily and messily that I just have to slap my forehead with a wet fish every time that I even consider watching it without fast forwarding to the sex. Ginger is relaxing at a party after a business meeting and talking to a husband & wife team. The lady wanders off while her husband gives her a tour of the house, including the bedroom. Guess what happens next? Actually, on second thought, don’t guess. You’ve already guessed three scenes before so this one is a no-brainer. Alas, the line delivery is terrible, including hers. Thankfully, the sex is pretty good. Ginger gets nibbled and licked by the lady of the household, and then gets impaled on a stiff dick. I love it when Ginger’s on top, because she gets as much freedom as she could possibly want to set those hips in motion and hypnotize the audience. Still, the lines are terrible, the acting is horrendous and the extra cheesy lick-my-lips-when-I-see-his-bulging-crotch is an affront to all sentients in the known galaxy. Apparently everyone was either having a bad day or the camera was especially good at picking up flaws that day. Details are rendered in the worst possible light, with bumps, zits, stray pubic hairs and the like just jumping out at you. This is not Ginger looking her best. It is, however, Ginger screwing at damn near the top of her form. Gotta love the hips, and she has a good screaming orgasm from her lady friend’s oral attentions. If you can get past the dialogue, this scene is very good.

Ah, save the best for last. “Outdoor Action” is just simply wonderful. Ginger gets to move her hips with damn near perfect precision. She gets on top, stays on top, and works her magic. This scene is… amazing. It’s hard to describe exactly what makes this scene so much better than the previous ones. The best way to describe it is that she is having sex with the other actor. She’s not performing for us, she’s having sex with him. She’s not trying to make it look good, she’s trying to make it feel good. Sure, it does slip a little in the middle, but when she stops bouncing on top of him like someone is holding her head like a basketball and trying to dribble, she looks damn good. All I can say is that I could never be a porn star, because if I had Ginger Lynn mounted on Mr. Happy and she started to move in that rolling super stroke, I would be gone in about three minutes. Speaking of Mr. Happy… Um, I’ll be back in a minute. I’m going to go watch that scene again…

The Audio / Image: Well, it’s early porn, so I can tell you right off the bat that the image is not going to be up to your typical modern DVD standards. Actually, the image is pretty inconsistent from scene to scene. I would lay pretty good money that there was absolutely no attempt to clean up the original source film before transferring it to DVD. Some of the scenes (the last one for instance) look pretty good, but not special. Some of them (the teacher’s pet scene) look downright horrible. Occasionally the material flickers a bit like there was a problem with the tape, and maybe two or three times on the disc, the audio just cuts off the last millisecond of a word. I honestly think these are all source material problems. Audio is pretty good, despite these one or two bumps, but nothing spectacular. The synthoporn is just as obnoxious as ever, but it never is really too loud to hear what’s going on.

The Extras: VCA has once again provided a little something extra for us all, with the emphasis on "little". There is a automatic slide show which is fairly frustrating, full motion scene access, a list of other VCA titles, an internet link, and a cast list. Best of all, there is an interview with Ginger while she was on the set of her movie Torn. The interview is pretty interesting, actually. You get a very good sense of how supremely confident Ginger is with the choices that she’s made in her career. She’s quite articulate about the matter and it shows exactly how much she loves her job. Good stuff. Alas, as you can see from the second sentence, this interview is really the only interesting thing on this disc. Even the list of other titles is useless, as it doesn’t contain a single trailer. The scene access is done well. Each vignette has two chapter stops, one at the beginning, and one where the sex starts. The links from the menu take you directly to the sex, but you can forward to the next scene easily. Nicely done, but that doesn’t make me wonder what happened to the rest of the content.

The Good: Sex, sex, sex, and more sex. Ginger’s hips, lips and the way she can do the Lock-Legged Lambada until one of you has collapsed.

The Bad: Image and audio problems due to the age of the source material. No overall plot, and what little there is has been written so badly as to bring tears to the eyes.

Overall: If you want to see what she was like in the beginning, get this disc. If you want to see what it was like back in the Good Old Days, rent this disc. If you don’t want either of those options… go rent it anyway, it will do you good.