Azz Fest 4 Review

Reviewed by Crucifixio Jones  on  8/16/2004

Azz Fest 4
****
2004, 2 hours and 30 minutes
Video Team
Directed by Van Styles
Starring Mika Tan, Jessica Darlin, Courtney Devine, Pandora Dreams, Rossana del la Vega

The Knowledge:

Here we are once again taking a look at the now fourth installment in the series that single-handedly renewed my interest in pornography and introduced me to a director after my own heart, Van Styles. Without a doubt, Video Team‘s Azz Fest and Elegant Angel‘s Big Wet Asses are currently the best “ass worship“ series on the market not actually named Ass Worship. Like Zupko‘s BWA, Styles continues to surprise us with each release, lining up virtual dream teams of ladies we want to see in a seemingly non-stop all-star procession of top talent. Every time a cast list is released, you want to fall over saying to yourself, “I can’t WAIT to see this.“ This outing is no exception. For your pleasure and perusal Styles has booked the insatiable and exotic asian Mika Tan, who in my opinion has been turning in the best performances of her career thus far this year; extreme little anal queen Jessica Darlin, who was my personal pick for Female Performer of the Year last year; Courtney Devine, who the box cover describes as the “Ultimate Redbone“ and is probably the black girl I like to watch most; the incomparable thick and bangin’ booty of lusty latina Rossana de la Vega and a vivacious and voluptuous new girl whom you‘re almost guaranteed to fall in unforgettable lust with, the curvaceous Pandora Dreams. This is truly, as the box states, “an arsenal of ass.” Styles has brought out the big guns and turned in an effort that makes his last work look like a .22 caliber pistol compared to this Gatling gun of grade-A gonzo.

The Action:

Mika Tan

When the opening credits feature Mika forcefully expelling an ice cube out of her pussy like a shotgun blast, you know her scene is going to be a winner. Mika and Surewood put on a literal clinic in David Aaron Clark’s Banana Cream Pie 3 earlier this year so I at least know half what to expect. After a short tease, she takes a look around Styles‘ place and decides that it needs a little more “wood.” More wood is exactly what she gets because as soon as Mika bends over, Brian Surewood and Mark Wood are there to run tiny ice cubes over her two fleshy butt cheeks. Her rump is so hot it‘s literally melting the ice cubes in mere seconds. One piece slips into her pussy and she pushes it out, sending it flying back out onto the oversized ottoman she‘s kneeling on. Surewood likes the trick so much he wants to see it again, but every cube they drop into her gash disappears forever, probably melting. That seems to be the case because as Mika sucks their cocks, the ice water runs freely out of her dripping snatch. Mika‘s having a good time with that “wood“ she wanted, working these two pieces of lumber like a part-time job, first alternately sucking them and then blowing one while tit-fucking the other.

Wood throws his pink plank into Mika first doggie while she continues to keep her lips wrapped firmly around Surewood’s 2x4. The guys switch places once before Mika plants herself on Wood’s cock cowgirl, bouncing that big ass of hers up and down on it until Surewood comes around to plug his prick in her poop chute resulting in a cowgirl DP. Mika’s got A LOT of ass for a little asian chick and Styles’ camera does not allow us to miss that fact. It’s right on top of every jiggle, ripple and bounce of that luscious bumper as it gets filled with two hard rods in both holes. Surewood walks his dick right to Mika’s mouth for a taste of a2m while she continues to ride Wood like a woman possessed. One-on-one missionary anal follows before the boys double stuff her again, this time reverse cowgirl. “You guys are working these holes real good,” snarls Mika through clenched teeth and a screw face that would make even the most reliable woodsman lose his load. Tan then saunters over to a staircase and bends down on all fours over the last few steps, letting the guys take turns plowing her heart-shaped hiney balls deep in up-and-over doggie while she blows the other. They even fuck her ass facing AWAY from her, instead of towards her like conventional doggie. That’s damn inventive, I must say. Mika then kneels between them for a double dose of protein smoothies all over her face. Surewood, of course, douses nearly her entire face nicely and Wood follows up with a respectable spray that lands mostly all over her tongue. “I’ve got cream of sum yung guy,” Mika jokes as she licks both cocks and plays with the cum. ****


Jessica Darlin

Jessica Darlin is one of those chicks who‘s got a deceptively killer bod. When people talk about the best bodies in the business, I doubt Darlin‘s name is frequently mentioned but man, it ought to be. This purple fishnet outfit she‘s rocking here is showing off curves a lot of fans have taken for granted over the years or didn‘t know she had. Jessica‘s got one helluva a nice, soft ass which she shakes and jiggles at will and all-natural tits that aren‘t the largest, aren‘t the smallest but are just right. All that and she knows what to do when a dick is placed in front of her, too. Mark Wood learns firsthand when he makes the mistake (or is it?) of whipping his johnson out in front of her at the top of a tall staircase. Darlin stares that one-eyed monster down and takes into her mouth working it over with reckless abandon, unintimidated. It takes more than a big stiff one to make Jessica Darlin back down.

Mark takes Jessica doggie style on the floor first, pulling her purple mesh bottoms down around her thighs. Her pants still around her thighs, Darlin lies back and lets Wood fill her ass up mish on a barstool. On occasion she asks Mark to pull out to see just how stretched out her asshole is, allowing the camera near to check out her ever-expanding gape. Not only does she take Wood into her mouth a2m, she tries to swallow that thing whole, letting him fuck her face and gag her repeatedly until drool runs down her chin and chest. Jessica then tears a wide opening in her mesh bottoms before fucking Mark anal cowgirl, her impressive ass crashing over his cock like a tidal wave. After this it’s back to doggie on the floor, this time the anal variation. Doggie soon becomes spoon which then becomes a hot reverse cowgirl anal ravaging. Wood sprays his seed on a nearby glass staircase barrier which Jessica licks up like it were ice cream. Very reminiscent of Ryan Conner’s antics in Ass Worship 3; maybe it’s an homage of sorts. ***½


Courtney Devine

Devine is showing off her body to Styles outside wearing the little purple number you see her in on the box cover. Prince would be so proud. All she has to do is cut the ass cheeks out of her shorts and she’d be there. Courtney struts inside to tease us some more before Brian Surewood shows up. I love that Courtney’s described as the “ultimate redbone” on the cover. I even laughed a little when I saw it. For those of you who don’t know, redbone is a term used to describe light-skinned blacks. I grew up hearing it a lot down south and thought that it was just something we said. So it was funny to me to see it somewhere else, especially on the front of a movie describing a porn star. Okay, street slang history lesson over, back to the action. And not a minute too soon because Courtney is literally feasting on Surewood’s meat, taking nearly all of it in with each pass of her lips. Damn, Courtney’s one of the few girls out there who can make giving head look like fun. Swear to God this girl is bobbing up and down on Brian like she wouldn’t rather be anywhere else. And really, isn’t that how head should be? Who wants a chick staring back up at you like she‘d rather be watching Nip/Tuck? I am supposed to watch television while you blow me, not the other way around.

This oral action goes on for longer than usual and Styles lets her continue to do her thing and why not, since Courtney‘s such a pro. I wouldn’t interrupt the chemistry. I actually recall her saying in Dymes 2 that she enjoys giving head the most and takes a lot of pride in her technique. I guess she wasn‘t bullshittin‘ because it definitely shows in her work. That shit was so good, Surewood feels obligated to return the favor so he goes down and licks Devine’s black hole until she’s reaching for shit that ain’t there. Then just when she can’t take anymore he rams his dick in and starts fucking like he’s in fifth gear, no warm-up whatsoever. Damn, that’s how you do it. Devine didn’t get a chance to catch her breath and never knew what hit her. Equally as seamless is the transition to her ass, which Surewood pounds relentlessly with his hands wrapped around Courtney’s throat. Devine flips over for some doggie anal action, smiling and giggling throughout. Normally, smiling and giggling would turn me off but I just can’t stay mad at the adorable freckled face of hers no matter how hard I try. She just attacks dick and enjoys it like a little kid on her favorite ride at the amusement park. It’s too sweet to get angry. A wide grin spreads across her face in reverse cowgirl as well, where she lets out loud and enthused “woooos” and other expletives while she rubs her clit and grinds on Surewood’s lap. She’s got one hand in the air like she’s riding the mechanical bull at some local redneck dive and her head is spinning like Linda Blair in “The Exorcist.” It’s an interesting visual contrast, let me assure you. When Courtney hops off to give Surewood some a2m attention we can see he’s almost in a daze and his trademark bandana has been fucked halfway off to the side of his head. No man can withstand the powerful sucking powers of Courtney Devine, however, as she sucks a nut right out his cock and onto her face. And I mean, she sucks him bone dry, slurping every last drop out and maintaining her girlish grin while she does it. I was warned this scene was hot and it lived up to the hype preceding it. ****


Pandora Dreams

New girl Pandora reminds me of Daphne Rosen with a smile like Mary Carey’s but a MUCH better ass. In fact, anyone who sees this movie will readily admit to you that Dreams has the absolute best ass, bar none, in the entire video. I mean, it is literally just ridiculous. Boy, they didn‘t make white girls with ass like that back when I was coming up or I‘m sure I would‘ve fucked a lot more than I already have. I always said I was born too soon and seeing Pandora‘s two Christmas hams peeking out from under her short denim miniskirt only confirms that. Not only does Pandora have an exquisite backside but she lifts up her tiny airbrushed half t-shirt to reveal an enormous set of all-natural bra busters that would put the aforementioned Mary Carey‘s to shame (and Carey‘s aren‘t real I don‘t care what she says). Surewood arrives on the scene and he‘s smiling from ear-to-ear like a kid with a new toy. And who can blame him? Were I Surewood, I would have to add Van Styles to my fuckin‘ WILL after hooking me up with a primo find like Pandora. I’m amending my will right now and all I have is the movie.

After a short, amateurish blowjob, Surewood makes Pandora lean back like the Terror Squad and ride him reverse cowgirl. If you dig thick girls with big tits and phat asses, have your baby wipes or whatever you use nearby, friends because this is the point in the video where you officially lose your load. This is a spectacle; Pandora’s thick thighs slapping against Surewood’s, her cunt getting filled to the brim, Surewood‘s dick rammed into her pussy to the hilt, her hips are so wide they‘re visible from the front and her tits, mah gawd, her tits are just out of control. They’re flapping so vigorously I thought Pandora was going to take flight. The view is just as good from the back when Surewood bends her over for some doggie. From the side, we can see those massive mams swaying out in front and in an angle over Surewood‘s shoulder, we get the most magnificent view of her backside yet, just rippling and undulating with every hard stroke. It only gets better when Surewood hikes up one of her legs to give us a better view of him ramming the ever-loving shit out of this newbie’s fuckhole. Goddamn. This is THE scene of the DVD, hands down. Fuck what you heard. I‘m at a loss for words on how to describe Pandora and her ass in cowgirl. I really don‘t know what to say. She is working that thing on Surewood and you‘ll have a hard time keeping it together at home watching, so Lord only knows how Brian‘s doing it right there in the thick (and I do mean THICK) of the action. I’m sweating right now and I haven’t moved a muscle. Lord, Styles, this movie deserves five stars just for the shots of Pandora from directly behind in cowgirl. You could sell a truckload of DVDs of that alone. I‘m serving notice: Olivia O‘Lovely, Katja Kassin, Sara Jay, whoever…you‘re title has officially just been stolen. Pandora Dreams is the New Queen of Ass. You heard it here first. Tit men will enjoy the mish banging that follows, with Pandora‘s chest heaving and her sweater shredders just jumping to and fro. Dreams hops to her knees and while the first stream misses her and lands on the red leather couch behind her, the rest of Surewood‘s payload catches her square in the face, most of it on her cheeks and up her nose. Nice. She grabs ahold of those tits of hers and shows off her cum-covered face and chest to end a SWELTERING HAWT scene for such a beginner.****½


Rossana de la Vega

“Exotic-looking Rosanna is a stranger to me but no stranger to her partner in today‘s scene, Brian Surewood. I believe they are a real-life item and the mind boggles at how a living, breathing biker/pirate look-a-like like Surewood can land himself a good looking, long-haired, big-assed beauty like De La Vega.” - Crucifixio Jones, “Crema Latina“ review

Rosanna’s no longer a stranger to me after seeing that flick and Zupko’s Big Wet Asses 2, but she’s still every bit the exotic-looking, raven-tressed, thick bootied bitch I took a liking to a few months ago. She makes some awful annoying, high-pitched whines when she’s being fucked but sometimes it can be pretty sexy. Very similar to Teri Weigel’s antics back in the day; some people couldn’t stand what they perceived as loud overacting, I never minded her much. Hell, I don’t mind her much today. In fact, I wish she’d shoot for some gonzo companies instead of doing so many features; I’d watch.

Rosanna has her boyfriend Brian Surewood blindfolded and handcuffed to begin the scene, falsely leading us to believe that for once, De La Vega might be the aggressor in this encounter. She straddles his lap and grinds herself against his body like a bitch in heat and then stands him up so that she can uncuff him. So much for that. Unshackled, Surewood almost immediately pushes Rosanna down to her knees where she undoes his pants so that she can dine on some dick. She gives some awesome head, truth be told, until she goes into ultimate submissive mode, letting Surewood forcefully toss her over on the sofa where he fucks her ass doggie through her black fishnet outfit. Rosanna reacts like always, like it‘s simultaneously the best and worst thing she‘s ever felt in her life. Her face says she likes it but the noises she makes sounds like she‘s dying inside. Surewood grabs Rosanna by the waist, spins around and suddenly she‘s screaming, suspended in mid-air reverse cowgirl. Her mouth is turned into this sexy and naughty frown while her eyes tell you that she wouldn‘t stop what she‘s doing for the world. De La Vega makes pain look oh so pleasurable. Cowgirl and spoon follow before Rosanna drops to her knees and works just the head of Surewood’s cock with small, gnawing sucks and her right hand. When the cum splashes her face, De La Vega closes her eyes and accepts it like a mini baptism, surprised by each drop but leaning back and basking in it as if it were a pure, cleansing rainfall. I like her style. ****


Extras:

Photo Gallery, Behind the Scenes (there‘s a funny moment when Styles asks Pandora to say “It‘s your pussy“ and she says over and over again “It‘s MY pussy, it‘s My pussy“ to much laughter from everyone on the set), Cast Bios, Web trailer, Phone Sex ads and Previews for Azz Fest’s 1 & 2 and Mamacitas, and a bonus scene featuring Pandora Dreams and Kurt Lockwood that was honestly good enough to be in the main movie but for fans of “azz“ Styles made the right choice in including her scene with Surewood instead. Dreams looks fantastic in her scene with Lockwood, though, sporting a fishnet getup and a great hairstyle rather than the plain t-shirt and denim garb she has on in her scene with Surewood.

Comments:

Video Team is making great strides in regards to the overall look of their DVDs. The main menu to this one leapt out at me and grabbed my attention from the start and the layout was very well done, eye-catching, colorful and nicely animated. It looked so good it was almost a shame I had to start the movie. Really, it was that sharp. Kudos to those responsible. There‘s a real shortage of capable men in Porn Valley, it seems as the male casts for Styles‘ movies get smaller and smaller with each outing. Brian Surewood is in four of the five scenes presented here. Mark Wood shares one scene with him and goes at it solo with Jessica Darlin. That‘s it. Kurt Lockwood shows up in the bonus scene with Pandora. Right now it‘s good to have the word “wood“ in your name, I suppose. No complaints in that department, however, all these guys have proved themselves time and time again and always turn in a good scene. All of the women brought their work boots, as well, Pandora Dreams impressing me the most which was a huge surprise considering her relative inexperience. Usually a new girl is the low point of a disc, not the reason to buy it as Dreams is in this case. And Lord Have Mercy, Styles was gracious enough to give us a double-dose of shorty when he could have easily kept that extra scene in the can or released it somewhere else later. This was an unexpectedly great installment of an already great series. Expect to hear “Azz Fest“ and the name Van Styles a lot come January.

Crucifixio Jones