Ultimate Asses (Platinum X Pictures) Review

Reviewed by The Pocketcomb Pimp  on  7/27/2004

I love Platinum X. These guys keep there titles simple, and leave no doubt about what you should expect.

The dictionary defies “Ultimate” as: “Representing or exhibiting the greatest possible development of size or significance.”

Drop ass on the end, and you have this title.

Ebony Green

Michael is a sexual nut. His scenes always start with him inspecting the goods. I spent many years as a buyer, and I can tell you I never inspected material half as thorough as this cat. He has a checklist like nobody’s business, and like Kool Moe Dee, “He Gets The Job Done”.

Not sure, but she looks like a girl I saw in a Red Light District title. Ebony is incredible, and if it’s the same girl, her looks have improved. This girl has an A+ ass. Thick in the hips, and a skinny waist, it don’t get no better.

Michael and Brandon take turns runnin up in dat ass while asking her “Too Much Dick For You?” These guys are hella funny, and no doubt that black women get their motor runnin.
Female Looks 9/10 Sex Rating 8/10

Austin

This girl is blessed with a mass of ass. Austin waste no time taking old boy in her stinker. She is very vocal and even talks some trash. Austin never really did it for me, and without her ass, she might not has ever made it on my radar. In spite of her efforts, the scene was very average.
Female Looks 7/10 Sex Rating 7/10

Velvet Rose

This girl is porn’s resident chameleon. I’ve seen her as dark as Hale Berry, and as light as Mariah Carey. Today she is on the darker side. I’ve only seen her once in a feature, and this scene let me know why it wasn’t memorable.

I tried to be open in this scene. Pumper is not a performer I care to watch. I will say that he tends to put in solid work, but he acts too goofy for me at times. This scene had no passion or chemistry, but I think it was a two way street. I can’t put this one on Pumper, it just didn’t get me going.
Female Looks 8/10 Sex Rating 6/10

Carmen

Carmen is a pretty girl. She looks like a more glamorous version of Rene Pornero. This scene was a 2 on 1, and the action was real. These two had this girl wet and moist some my moma’s 7up sponge cake. Great camera work here, and a great Euro scene if that’s your get down.
Female Looks 8/10 Sex Rating 8/10

Jada


If you’ve read my reviews, you already know how I feel about Jada. You need to know that leaving Michael alone with a black woman is like leaving a fat kid alone with candy.

Jada is bad. I think I like her cause she’s porn with a plan. Since the first time I saw her in a Video Team Joint, she’s gotten braces, boob job, and tightened up her frame. It don’t get sexier than that. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s working on a low degree to boot.

Another good scene, and Stefano left her face so sticky that Jada ended up looking like a kid that rides the short bus.
Female Looks 9/10 Sex Rating 9/10

I know Stefano has been around a while, so this wasn’t his first title. This wasn’t the best ass film I have ever seen, but it but it shows me how far he has come since he signed with Platinum X.

I wonder if Stefano has one glove, cause he’s a Smooth Criminal. That guy is straight stealing black ass! I could see Michael chillin throwing the Whamo at the park with Brandon when a carefully planned throw puts the Frisbee in the middle of the Jenkins Family Reunion. When Michael goes to get the Frisbee back, my guess would be that not only would he come back with a plate of Ribs, Chicken and soul food, he’d have the phone number of at least two bad bitches.

Good casting here, but the non Stefano scenes bring down this picture.

Questions & Comments