Tera Tera Tera Review

Reviewed by bronded  on  9/12/2006

There is no doubt that Tera Patrick is a porn superstar. Her natural beauty and smoldering on-scene presence has made here firm fan favourite over the years. Tera Tera Tera marks a defining moment in Tera's porn career, and to me, marks the beginning of the end. After taking a break from porn for over 12 months, this is her first movie back in the business with a new production company, a new husband and a new pair of boobs.

Three things:
1. Tera looks as hot as ever. I am not a massive fan of fake boobs, but Tera's surgeon has done a good job - apparently she lost much of her bust as she slimmed down so needed the implants.
2. Tera is in three out of five scenes. All these scenes are hot, the other two are not!
3. Tera's husband is an ugly bastard. My wife and I find him so unappealing that we have decided that we will not be getting any more Tera videos in future, which is a terrible disappointment as we are both big fans of her work.

The movie is basically a doco-porn, with a series of conversations with Tera taking place between scenes. This is a great format, as there is no clumsy plot, and Tera is able to inject each scene with real energy by introducing her reasons for doing them. The film opens with Tera and Spyder (her man) doing their thing. Basically, he looks like a member of the homosexual Hell's Angel club, clad in leather and covered in tatts. The scene does have some real fire though as they clearly know how to satisfy each other.

The third scene of the film sees Tera match up with Savanna Sampson in what is one of the hottest girl/girl encounters I have witnessed. Both girls are smokin' hot and the sex is both imaginative and impassioned. The metal sex toys are killer. The final scene of the movies is a threesome with Savanna, Tera and Spyder which again, is full of heat.

The other two scenes in the film are a real letdown. The second scene is a threesome involving Jordan Haze, who has that more traditional porn star plastic look that I am not a huge fan of. She gives a vigorous blow job to her two male companions and proceeds to get fucked in what is a very energetic encounter. However, for eighty percent of the scene she has a cock in her mouth. This is not an issue on its own, but she insists on making the most disagreeable noises while sucking dick. The scene is this filled with an incessant squealing that is reminiscent of the sounds of a stuck pig. By the end of the scene we were yelling at her to “Shut Up!”

The fourth scene is an orgy sequence involving three guys and four girls. Two factors let this down. Firstly, most of the men were wearing completely ridiculous outfits (who finds a glittering pink vest on a guy sexy?!!?). And secondly, most of the sex was very mechanical. In some movies, mechanical sex is not an issue as the eye candy is enough to get the juices flowing. In this film, Tera’s scenes are all so loaded with sexual energy that it leaves those without her inclusion feeling a little bland.

Basically, this is a great film for any Tera fan, with a couple of dud scenes thrown in. However, the fact that we are only going to see her having sex with her butt-ugly husband from now on means that Tera is no longer on my list of must haves. Her fake boobs also detract from the natural beauty that she has always been famous for. Thank god we have such a rich back-catalogue of Tera works to enjoy!!