Tabitha is on Fire Review

Reviewed by Rieekan  on  9/16/2001

* DIRECTOR: Jesse Jim Turner (1997)
* DURATION: »75mins
* FEMMES: Charlie, Cortknee, Farrah, Heather Lee, Spice & Tabitha Stevens.

WELCOME to Rieekan Review #9 Tabitha Is On Fire. What I wanted from this Tabitha Stevens DVD was five or six scenes (maybe one without Tabitha), some nice lesbian sex, a few facials and no pretence to a story. That very simple mix would have satisfied me.

But from the moment of the misspelled “Tabatha Stevens” in the introductory credits, I knew I was going to get something else. This pitiful and deceptive offering from Explosive DVD knocks Tabitha a peg down my All-Star list and she must cringe to have her name associated with a production like this. Each of the four scenes begins with some rubbish about her intimate fantasies then proceeds straight to the crappy sex.

EXTRAS: 4 chapters, phone sex advertisements & time-delay photo gallery (1:48). The low quality photo gallery includes stills from the falsely advertised FF and MF scenes, some alluding to her squirting.

NOTES: COMPLETE FALSE ADVERTISING – the scenes on the covers and in the photo gallery do not appear at all in this DVD! Tabitha is only in two scenes. There were colour and severe camera problems as well as bad music. To top it all off, this “feature length” DVD is the shortest I’ve ever seen at 75 minutes.

SCENE 1: Heather Lee (?) & Tabitha Stevens.
Heather looks a bit like J.R. Carrington in her stars-and-stripes bikini and is reasonably attractive. Tabitha looks very ordinary here, with a hardened face, lines under her eyes and implant scars emphasised like never before. She licks and fingers Heather, talking annoyingly, but not performing too badly (I haven’t seen her in much girl/girl action before). The cameraman has had way too much coffee and the atrocious photography is worsened by the outdoor setting. This was a weird scene – it didn’t have any kissing or toys, was too long, un-erotic and horribly filmed.

SCENE 2: Farrah (?) & Dave Hardman.
Farrah is a cute brunette who looks like Friends’ Maggie Wheeler (Janice). She blows Hardman briefly and there is some better filming here, but no relevance to Tabitha. She has very large implants but is quite sexy and despite Dave’s looks, there is some warmth. The filming degenerates with some infuriating upside down angles. After cowgirl, doggy, side-on and side-on anal, he cums a little on her mammoth breasts. Then of course, he felches. In any other circumstances this scene could have been good.

SCENE 3: Charlie, Cortknee & Spice (?).
“See the way that guy was ramming that chick? I wish it was me,” Tabitha says. Well, you don’t always get what you want Tabby. The three girls eat each other but the incompetent filming hides their faces for as long as possible. The hideous toys, the blonde’s horrendous voice and terrible camera-work ruin any possible heat with these three attractive women. The blonde (Spice?) didn’t know what do with the double-headed dildo. This was a waste of the girls, especially beautiful Charlie. There was some warmth and kissing, but too much bad filming and toys.

SCENE 4: Tabitha Stevens; Tabitha Stevens & Kyle Phillips.
This scene begins with close-ups of Tabitha’s brutal scars (ouch!) but her face looks much better. It is a fairly decent masturbation scene with cuts from another movie in which she’s fucked by Kyle Phillips. Later, she squeezes some white goo out of her nipples, which I assume was silicon, and licks it with her tongue. The other scene has some poorly-filmed thrusting and oral, ending with a cumshot on her stomach. Some parts of the masturbation were ok.

In comparison to my expectations and wants, Tabitha Is On Fire should probably get ½ a star. On merits alone, there were some passable moments in this movie but the horrible camera- work and Explosive’s false advertising are unacceptable. However, I’m willing to give bonus points for sexy Farrah and some of Tabitha’s masturbation. I really would have liked to have seen the cut scenes – maybe they could have saved this DVD.

Don’t bother with the marshmallows, there’s no fire here.

Rieekan

NEXT RIEEKAN REVIEW Trouble Maker