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It's been a while since I checked out the Superfuckers line, not
since Woodman made the switch to Hustler. Now I read on the ADT
forums that Superfuckers is being issued by a new company, confusingly
not a Hustler offshoot despite the name. Curiouser and curiouser.
Whatever the off-screen details, with a sexy hostess introducing
the unrelated sex scenes, from the outset it seems little has changed…
Mandy
First on the agenda is a skinny little waif with amazing eyes and
long braided hair. She's dressed in a pink frock as she masturbates
while Pierre, behind the camera, mutters his usual pleasantries.
He thumbs her little ass and pussy, leaving her moaning and writhing
on the bed.
In come Joachim and Pascal, and Pierre instructs them to "destroy
this bitch" (his words, not mine). How charming. Mandy looks even
more petite between the two men, sucking Joachim (who wears an Adult
DVD Talk t-shirt!) and being eaten by Pascal. She rides, the cock
banging up fast to meet her, and I suddenly realise she's got virtually
no ass to speak of, or to spank on! Strong doggy sex with Pascal
leads to spoons with Joachim. He nudges into her ass, a teeny little
anus that's soon being stuffed by Pascal. Joachim struggles to make
a DP, eventually succeeding, and with more DP leading on to a pair
of facials, that's the scene in a nutshell. Mandy's vocal responses
seem oddly disembodied, perhaps by her rather blank facial expressions,
and it's all rather hard, fast and strictly one-dimensional.
Gretty
This is a behind the scenes look at a photo shoot for Barely Legal
Hardcore magazine, stretching a point when we consider it was shot
in August 1999 and the model is Greta Milos. The location is Budapest,
the stone and wood house used for e.g. the Nicole Taylor/Lillian
McClellan scene in True Anal Stories 9. The short haired and svelte
yet busty Gretty looks absolutely stunning - quite the picture of
grace and beauty as she poses solo and then with Alain Deloin for
the usual oral/anal/facial routine. Alain pops twice, Gretty handles
it all with the utmost professional composure, which is remarkable
in its own way when we consider she's dealing with a faceful of
semen rather than a co-star who keeps fluffing his lines.
Nika
The sound recording for both the introduction and Pierre's preliminary
mumblings are atrocious. So if the end credits and/or chapter menu
captions are to be trusted, this is Nika, a young, pale skinned
brunette with pretty eyes, tiny tits and just a hint of puppy fat
about her curvy little form. She's in a dressing gown and garish
pink underwear when James, Bob and Yannick descend upon her. Cocks
slide into her mouth, Yann eats her, James fucks her. She moans
her way through doggy sex, with light smacks and dutiful blowjobs.
The guys take turns at her, spanks leave handprints on her pale
ass cheeks, and there's lengthy anal sex before her heavy breathing
anticipates the double penetration. After a while of this, they
change. Her little budding boobs stick out as she rides James, then
Yann goes up her ass. I suppose there's a particular thrill in seeing
a physically diminutive girl like this taking on big guys, ending
up with their come on her face, but for me it's just not enough
to lift this out of the humdrum. In real life, it might be extraordinary.
In porn, it's par for the course. Pretty girl, though.
Barbara
So, time for another tiny little girl, this time a dark-haired waif
picked up by Bob at a city lookout. Seeing burly Bob leading this
youngster off by the hand looks slightly questionable. She's over
eighteen of course. Right? Back in a gaudily decorated bedroom,
they kiss and by comparison of his meaty hands with her little head,
the difference in physique is doubly emphasised. He whisks off her
jeans and goes down on her hairless pussy, causing soft sobs to
emanate from her lips.
Barbara returns the favour before they launch into the sex but is
it only the out of sync sound that makes this all seem oddly unmoving?
Again, the theme seems to be tiny girl with beefy guy, as Bob moves
her around, plants her on his cock and sticks it to her this way
and that. She actually seems underdeveloped for an adult - her tits
are tiny, her ass is minute. Combined with pallid skin and tattoos,
she's really not that attractive and the sex, including prolonged
anal and the usual facial, isn't exactly scintillating either. Can
a scene be energetic and yet, somehow, simultaneously lifeless?
Angel
and Caroline
As with the Gretty scene, a flurry of stills from a magazine shoot
form the introduction to this "on set" footage. This time we're
in Kiev (or Kyiv) for Hustler XXX magazine (caption says Vol. 1.
No 19, end credits say 15) and an office location for a shoot featuring
two very attractive girls. Blonde Angel is from Exxxotica, while
I don't recall off hand seeing brunette Caroline before. Both are
very sexy, Angel in particular, but it's worth bearing in mind that
the sex they have here is all posed for stills, not full on action,
so the anal, double penetrations and facials are not quite as hot
as one might expect. Despite some amusing moments (e.g. cleaning
the come off the paperwork afterwards) and the sight of Gabriella
Tchekan as the make-up artist, this is a drawn-out clip, without
sufficient insight to make it worthy of such a substantial allocation
of running time.
Tera
Joy
The vivacious, sometimes wild Tera (AKA Tereza Sweet) stars as a
saucy ice-skater in a novel scene that takes place in a deserted
skating rink. Her smutty moves might gain a perfect score from this
judge, but I can't help wondering if her considerable talents play
second fiddle to a gimmicky location that compromises the action.
What goes on? After Tera's cheeky figure skating, Yannick and Pascal
skate on for some sex on ice. She wriggles her firm form between
the two men who help her out of her red dress and start the sucking
and fucking with an acrobatic position. It's remarkable they can
get any purchase for a good thrust when screwing on skates, but
hey, they're pros. Getting down on the ice for sex with only a jacket
as flimsy padding is no problem here - we're treated to the works:
oral, straight sex, anal and lots of double penetration with typically
vociferous reactions from feisty Tera. Maybe it's only a hint of
how feisty she can be, but it's the best thing in this movie by
far. It doesn't take much of her hand and mouth action to get the
lads off, all over her face. I'm sure they'd testify this ice queen
is a hot little number…hmm, that tabloid writer's job is surely
mine.
Maika
The conclusion is a very brief solo girl scene with our hostess
using a little golden bullet vibrator on her pussy as she poses
on an upturned rowing boat. I've no idea either. Maika is a very
attractive girl, however, with raven hair, dark eyes and a leggy,
tan form that sort of says, Laura Angel's little sister. Kind of.
This is just a tiny tease, nothing else.
Overall
From past knowledge, I was well aware the Superfuckers experience
could turn out to be somewhat one-dimensional. I wasn't prepared
for it to be quite like this. There are barely two decent hardcore
scenes in well over two hours. Sure, I'll admit my preference for
something with a little more chemistry and passion could be prejudicial,
but I can readily put my brain out of gear and simply lap up some
pretty girls in hard action when the need arises. And so in that
regard, Woodman can still be relied upon to deliver beautiful girls,
anal sex and basically functional production values. That seems
to be the sum and substance of what Superfuckers 22 offers.
The thing is that it all seems too cheap, too dashed off, too flimsy
to be worth bothering about. I mean this in terms of quality, rather
than the perceived "hardness" of the action. It seems as though
neither Woodman nor his paymasters, whoever they may be, care about
this, so why should we? Examples: apart from the generally forgettable
sex, we have the shoddy dubbing, the poor sound, cheap-looking colour,
the casual misogyny - need I go on? What about the ponderous editing,
as though each sex position has to run a set time? The backstage
photo shoot scenes seem gratuitously long, as though filling out
the running time rather than providing the informative role they
play in Private's Casting series (and even then, it's debatable).
No, I can't recommend this at all - the girls are good but there's
better sex, better variety and simply better value to be had elsewhere.
DVD
Comments
As I mentioned, some of the sound is quite ropey and the colour
generally seems bright and cheap looking - odd really, as some of
Woodman's stuff has seemed dark and dull. The disc offers a handy
breakdown of each scene via the chapter menu, but otherwise the
disc features are pretty flimsy - a small selection of trailers
and the dubious delights of the photo gallery are all that's on
offer.
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