Stretched Out Snatch Review

Reviewed by cv  on  6/12/2005

Shane Diesel has recently arrived on the porn scene; laughably billed as the biggest dick in porn, he's certainly not as long as Lexington Steele or Mandingo (the latter seems to be the largest), Shane is still packing some serious thick meat in his jeans. This is the second black stud that Tyrone Shuz has initiated a series for (the other being the eponymous Biggz and the Beauties).

Hopefully this guy can make it; the porn world needs new male talent. Here he's paired off with five chicks, one who is one of the top starlets currently working (Missy Monroe), one whom I've only seen slightly (Deja Daire), and three new ones.

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Scene 1 - Deja Daire

No real lead-in apart from a short tease segment paired with music, it's just little brunette Deja Daire who starts sucking that black meatsicle. I really haven't seen her in much, but she's cute and looks like a cock-hungry slut. She makes some cute groans as Shane pushes that fat tool into her pussy doggy style. With her head bent down, she queefs a little before she rolls over and gets her clit licked. Shane seems to be a nice guy, interested in making it pleasurable for the girl before he slides it in missionary style. The fucking gets more energetic when they switch to cowgirl, before she dismounts and licks away at that chocolate pole. They move to anal doggy and there are several quick gape shots and some A2M but she can't deep throat it. An abrupt cut takes us to him coaxing his cum into her mouth, leaving us wondering what we missed.

Scene 2 - Missy Monroe

Next up is proven porn starlet, Missy Monroe. This nasty-talking blonde can do it all and usually does. She's fingering her clit on a couch and is embarrassed to be caught in the act when Shane shows up. Good acting since I doubt Missy would truly be embarrassed. Shane licks her labia for a moment. His dick impresses Missy as she moves to start sucking it. I can't help but noticing that it looks like this scene is shot in the same high desert house where she shot her Baker's Dozen scene. Her dirty talk really kicks into gear as he slips his cock in doggy style. She gets on top in cowgirl, but when she moves to reverse cowgirl, we really get a nice view, especially of her nice boobs bouncing up and down. Anal's no problem for super slut like Missy, and she looks great in reverse anal cowgirl. There's a little A2M action, then she's lying back, her thighs on the couch, her shoulders on the ground, her queefs almost as loud as her moaning. There's a little choking as she gets face fucked. He slips it back into her backdoor in an anal spoon followed by more A2M by this superslut. He must be doing something right as he pumps her pussy because she squirts. A few more pumps and he drops his load into her mouth; it mostly just dribbles out but she's not complaining.

Scene 3 - Carmen

Like the other scenes, the girl does a quick tease and without any lead-in, the action starts. Shane likes licking pussy and that's how he says hello to this short-haired brunette Latina. She does an adequate but not mind-blowing blowjob before he rams her pussy with his rod. She nails her missionary, cowgirl, doggy, spoon and finally from behind with her on her stomach. From that last angle, yeah, it's a pretty thick cock and that position makes the girl's pussy pretty tight. He pulls out and dribbles his cum into Carmen's mouth as she sucks his thick dick. Compared to the previous two scenes, this one just lacked energy or chemistry and that's not due to the fact that it's just vaginal sex.

Scene 4 - Sunshine

Sunshine is a mixed-race girl; with her hairstyle and outfit (featuring plaid miniskirt) she looks like she just graduated from high school. Shane proves himself again to be a guy who likes to lick as he starts munching on her ass. She tries very hard to deep throat him and comes up a little short, but then again, who wouldn't? Whatever her real age is, it looks like she's done this before. For those of you who enjoy hairier bushes, you're going to enjoy this. It's been tidied up a bit, but she has left plenty there (which with her dark hair and darker complexion actually makes the penetration rather difficult to see). They switch from missionary to cowgirl, but the camera never does seem to close in on the action. Sunshine does seem to be enjoying his cock before he pulls her off his cock and he strokes just one squirt out. She doesn't seem to care, and she sucks away.

Scene 5 - Yumi

Yumi is a fairly cute Japanese babe who plays with her pussy until Shane walks into the room. Just like that, she starts sucking his cock. (Now why doesn't this happen to me?) She has the weakest cocksucking skills of all five actresses, but Shane doesn't seem to mind. Again, Shane starts pounding her pussy missionary style and I think she's a bit in disbelief of his cock size. With her head does in doggy style, that's the position that's very queef-friendly and that's what we hear as he plows into her. Actually, when there's queefing, that means you're probably doing something right, but it's rarely captured in porn (which is a shame in my opinion) since a lot of girls get embarrassed by the noises. She's certainly enjoying herself and we're treated to some nice shots of her in cowgirl position. Reverse cowgirl leads to a couple more vaginal positions before he pulls out and pops around the Asian babes awaiting mouth.

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Production Values

Generally speaking the production values are pretty good although the lighting is a bit inconsistent in some shots. Also, the Star Index menu (which should really be a scene index) does not exact match the order of the scenes in the feature (scenes 3 and 4, Carmen and Sunshine's are inexplicably reversed in the Star Index menu).

DVD Extras

Behind The Scenes - Especially in an all-sex movie with zero dialogue, it's nice to see behind the scenes footage, particularly the interviews with the female talent. There is a super-annoying soundtrack that blares over the Sunshine's interview. I have no idea if 19-year-old Sunshine is a typical newcomer, but she seems to be having a good time although she certainly has some money management issues (which is sadly all too common for youngsters these days). Yumi's quite cute and her English is pretty good as she answers questions. Wow, I probably would have enjoyed Carmen's scene more if her BHS interview was included in the feature because she has a cute disposition.

They say that if there's something in the DVD extras that's worth watching more than once, then they're worth it. Missy Monroe's Behind The Scenes interview is as good as anything in the feature, possibly one of the best BTS interviews I've ever seen. No spoilers here, go watch it for yourself; all I'll say is that director Tyrone Shuz was impressed by Missy. Her interview concludes the BTS footage and it's unfortunate that Shane himself didn't get to talk.

Bonus Scene (China Syndrome) - I'm not too sure who this is, but it's some Asian babe getting reamed by two guys. It's the full scene from another movie from Digital Sin's catalog. She takes it in a number of positions, including some DP action, before the two studs pop their loads on her mouth.

Pick Your Pleasure - This is a fetish menu, with themes like blowjobs, doggy, etc. Basically each selection is a compilation of that action from all five scenes.

Web Trailer - this is an ad for the NewSensations.com pay site.

The standard still Photo Gallery slideshow, movie Trailers and Company Info page round out the DVD extras.

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Conclusion

Shane makes a decent entry into porn, but there's a way to go if he's hoping to reach the Lex/Sean/Mandingo/Mr. Marcus level. He seems like a nice guy, genuinely interested in making sure the girls have a good time, but without any dialogue, it's rather hard to understand what sort of guy he is. The brief dialogue in some other gonzos really does help.

Unsurprisingly, of the feature's five scenes, Missy Monroe's is the best. What was unexpected was the hotness of Missy's Behind The Scenes interview. Fuck, she is insanely hot; she is everything that an A-List porn starlet needs to be. She talks the talk and she walks the walk. Big time.

Sorry, rating this movie is difficult. Without Missy's BTS interview, this movie scores a 3.5; with the interview, I'm giving it a full extra point. If you like Missy, this one is certainly a rental, possibly a keeper.

Thank you, Missy, you made a fan for life!

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