Staten Island Sex Cult Review

Reviewed by Joe Shaver  on  11/14/2004

I like porn films with a plot, but the only bad thing about this one is it has one. Not only is the plot silly, it has more holes in it than a block of swiss cheese. However, one can overlook that since the sex here is red hot. And that’s what really counts.

The setting is the Staten Island abode of a sex cult, a cult—as they keep reminding us—which is more fun than Scientology. Their leader is Stinkmetal, a skinny guy with a bleached Mohawk, who babbles on from time to time about aliens. Remember that cult who thought aliens were coming and castrated themselves? Well, this group is not about to do that, as sex is part of their raison d’être.

When the film opens the cult members are gathered for breakfast. Stinkmetal tells two of the guys to go upstairs where one is to eat out the others ass. Here is the first of the great holes in the plot, as we don’t see them doing this. One of these guys was really hunky and I was all keyed up, too! Chris Capelli—pierced eyebrow, shaved head, mustache with goatee, leather cap, leather shorts, and thigh-length boots—requests that he be excused from latrine duty to practice his dancing. He tells Stinkmetal that if he dances at a club he can bring in money for the cult. Getting permission, he then heads upstairs to practice in the room where Lance Burstin is lifting weights. Chris’ seductive dance routine puts an end to that. He peels off the leather shorts and continues to wiggle his ass in only a posing strap (leather of course). When he dances over to Lance, the former exerciser pops open the leather pouch to free Chris’ cock. “Can I take a rain check?” Chris says before Lance can go down on him, thereby frustrating both him and us. Chris heads off to the shower where we see him soaping that uncut cock. A naked Lance joins him. It’s time to redeem that rain check. Lance now goes down on Chris. But it’s Chris who ends up doing most of the cocksucking. Lance has brought a can of beer into the shower with him and as Chris blows him he takes an occasional swig. He lets the beer cascade down his body. When he pours some directly into Chris’ mouth, Chris spits it out onto the cock and goes back to sucking. (This would make a hell of a beer commercial!) Once outside the shower Chris gets fucked. (That will teach him to wiggle that ass in such a seductive manner.)

At Staten Island Beach we see Malice, a studly black man, walking along the boardwalk. In the sand below a blond bimbo is dancing for her boyfriend. Occasionally she pulls open her bikini top to flash her boobs at him. But the boyfriend (John Leon) is more interested in Malice who has stopped to watch. We cut to Malice and John back at the cult house. John is lying on his stomach on a massage table ready for a massage (or so he thinks). With only a token massage of the back, Malice removes John’s shorts and underwear and moves his hand directly into John’s ass crack. Malice—now nude—sits in a chair in front of the beach boy. John seems like a bird hypnotized by a snake as he watches Malice stroke that black fuck-stick. The cock heads towards John’s mouth and is soon inside it. John sucks it greedily. His own cock, poking out from under his ass, is rock hard. John is one sexy dude (my favorite among all these performers). He has black curly hair. There is a sprinkling of hair on his chest and his cock is enormous. He turns over onto his back and Malice leans over him so that they can engage in a super sixty-nine. After a time, John leans over the table for Malice to fuck him. Later, lying on his back on the table, Malice continues to fuck him in that position. John’s cock lies rigidly along his belly. The scene concludes with both seated on a sofa kissing passionately. John really delights in swabbing his tongue over Malice's tongue-piercing. John takes another slurp on Malice’s cock before they both jack off. It is here we see that John’s cock is bigger than that of Malice, and he shoots a much bigger load. This was one hot scene.

On board the Staten Island Ferry headed towards Manhattan, cult member Vinny Lucchese cruises Joey La Beau. Vinny is another young man who—like Chris—finding themselves to be going bald has opted for a shaved head. (I would do that too if I were balding.) He’s a hot young stud. Joey is not as his name translates “the handsome”, but you wouldn’t send him out into the night. They arrive at the cult’s Manhattan annex just as a cat burglar is crawling out the window onto the fire escape. Neither notices, as they are too engrossed in one another. In the bedroom, Vinny removes Joey’s shoes and socks and starts sucking his toes. (Shrimpers take note, there is some hot footwork going on here!) Joey wants to suck something else of Vinny’s. And so he does. Vinny lubes his fingers with spit and shoves them in Joey’s ass. His dick follows. After Vinny has withdrawn and dropped his load, Joey face-fucks him in order to bring himself to climax.

Meanwhile back at the house, Stinkmetal is inducting Carlos Morales into the cult. Carlos who has appeared in films with Michael Lucas and Titan is the only “known” performer in the cast. Stinkmetal tattoos the cult's weird insignia onto Carlos’ left pec. Then Carlos poses for pics. Carlos treats us to a very erotic routine that I assume is what he performs in clubs. (If it isn’t, it ought to be.) The viewer will not fail to be turned on as Carlos slowly and tantalizingly strips. When he is down to only the leather posing strap such as Chris was wearing, he suddenly turns around and there is his stiff cock poking out from the leather. When he removes that, he is wearing only a cockring. Even the cockring disappears as Carlos moves to sit by a full-length mirror to jack off, giving us double pleasure. His load is copious, rich and creamy.

John Leon—my favorite—returns to the house in search of Malice. Although the black stud is not there, Chris Capelli is not about to let such a stud get away and invites him in to wait. They don’t even make it up the stairs before Chris is all over him. Jeesh, but John has a big dick! It arcs out over his hairy balls and looks to be at least ten inches. (I was smitten with John even before I knew how much meat has packing. But, hey, that’s just a bonus.) The nice thing about an arcing dick is that it’s perfectly designed to go down a throat and so gives Chris no problems in doing just that. Sox another mustachioed-goateed cult member has been getting off watching them and joins in. Chris cums as fingers in his ass massage the prostate. With John lying on his back, he is screwed with a dildo. He is about to cum when there is a blinding light and an alien abduction takes place. All that remains in the room is clothing belonging to three studs. Damn aliens! Why couldn’t they have waited until John shot before zapping them up????

I liked this film, but I wanted more. Not just John’s cum shot, but the scene with the two guys who went upstairs to eat ass. And I would like to have seen Stinkmetal getting it on with someone. I liked director Jack Shoot’s humor and the satire in this film. I liked the sex. If you want a change from the awesome Adonises we see in these films then this one will give you just that. These performers are not demigods, just hot and sexy guys engaged in first-rate sex. And…it’s at a very reasonable price.