Scoring Big Review

Reviewed by Joe Shaver  on  9/6/2002

SCORING BIG is another of those films with a sport theme. These are designed to give us the fantasy of athletic jocks being gay. In most instances we can very easily believe the guys are gay; it is much more difficult to imagine them as jocks. Scoring Big, for example begins with our performers ineptly kicking a soccer ball around. They are not even on a par with the rejects from a high school girls’ team. The credits having now rolled by we find ourselves with four players. Neo, Baressi’s latest twink discovery, says, “ Let’s play some real ball”, and he and Deacon Frost go off together. “Good idea,” Kyle Richards affirms. “Let’s go’, says Kurt Wagner and these other two head off together.

When we see Neo and Deacon again both are already naked on the bed and Deacon is sucking Neo’s cock. Neo is a skinny kid with a nice stiff cock. The tips of his hair are bleached. He looks to be no more than 18 and three days. Deacon appears to be thirty-something, looks a bit like Al Gore, and probably thinks gym is something spelled J-i-m. Director Baressi has a truly terrible talent for odd pairings, and this is the first instance of it here. Neo is rather sweet sucking on Deacon’s dick and lapping it with his pierced tongue. It is odd however to see him fucking Deacon. Somewhat like watching a Chihuahua fucking a Basset Hound.

When they have both shot their loads, we find Kyle Richards and Kurt Wagner fully dressed kissing in a chair. Kurt fishes Kyle’s uncut cock out of his soccer shorts and goes down on it. Richards is the only one in the cast who remotely resembles a straight football jock so it’s surprising to see that he too is an accomplished cocksucker. Jump cut to: Wagner riding Richards’ cock. (I hate it when directors do this! Stripping out the clothes is one of the most erotic acts a person can do. If that were not so, Burlesque would never have flourished, and we wouldn’t pack the bars today to watch it being done. We’ve just been cheated out of 70% of the heat.) However, we do get to see Kyle’s cock enter Kurt’s ass when they move into a doggie fuck. We also get our first look at Kyle’s naked bod. Yum! From the tips of his prematurely graying hair to the tips of his slender toes, this guy is very nice. He is certainly going on my list of hotties.

It’s back to the soccer field with four more sissy kickers. Again after two lines of dialogue they exit in pairs. First up in scene three we finally have two twink cuties: Damen West and Jamie Blade. Damen has jet-black hair and a jet-black and (very bushy) bush. He also has naturally hairy balls and a swell cock. Jamie is slender with reddish highlights in his hair. They really go at it. It is especially good when Damen squats over Jamie’s head and face-fucks him. They also 69. It was great to see Damen put the condom on and insert his dick into Jamie’s ass. BUT DAMN IT TO HELL, I WAS REALLY PISSED OFF BY THE FAKE CUM SHOTS! Jamie’s may have been real, but Damen’s most definitely was not. One can see the fake semen coming from under the cock and not out of the piss-slit. It doesn’t have the consistency of semen either. It would be better for actors not to cum at all then for directors to show such contempt for an audience’s intelligence and the actor’s ability that they resort to this.

The last scene is somewhat unfortunate in that Court Logan, the film’s biggest name, is paired with a swishy, unattractive old guy. Oh, let’s just say it, with a troll. Okay, so the guy’s supposed to be the coach, but we and Court deserve better. When we find them naked and in bed paralleling the first scene, and see the size of the cock that Court is trying to swallow, we know why this guy got the part. (But still that face! And when Court kisses him, I shudder.) When the troll—uh, coach—goes down on Court it’s one of those hand-assisted sucks, I hate. He does, to be fair, give Court a damn good rimming. Then we get another of those cuts that bypass the good stuff and find Court riding the coach’s cock. The kid has a sweet ass, and this is a good ride! It has, thanks to Court, turned out to be a pretty good scene. Court is a good fuck. When it comes to the money shots now, I’m suspicious. Court’s appears to be real; the coach’s may be phony. I found Court Logan much more attractive here than in his earlier films. I think the short hair makes him sexier than the mop he had. He certainly proved here than is an adept sexual performer. (Something one needs to be if one does escort work where the clientele is less than attractive. I don’t know if Court has this sideline, but he definitely could.)

The DVD extras include brief and awkward interviews, but they’ve made a gesture toward giving us extras. Baressi has it in him to be a good director and has done some good stuff in the past. I fear that the money road is becoming increasingly more attractive and that he is sacrificing quality for quantity. And to give oneself credit for writing a script that has four lines of dialogue is the height of egotism. I found the whole venture disappointing. It doesn’t “score big”.