Playing With Audrey Hollander Review

Reviewed by astroknight  on  3/7/2005

The Little Details

Running Time: 52 min.

Production Date: 10 / 11 / 2004

Director: None credited, but I think it’s Chico Redfield

Cast: Audrey Hollander and “you” (played by Otto Bauer)

The Short Story

Initial Expectations: After watching many of Anarchy’s virtual releases, I’m expecting some decent sex here brought down by fairly incompetent technical knowledge and most of the cover claims being false.

Initial Reaction: As usual with Anarchy’s interactive releases, the sex is hot but the virtual aspect holds the entire thing back

Who Should Watch It : Fans of Audrey Hollander

Who Should Avoid It: Anybody wanting to see Audrey Hollander in a decently done interactive release

The Technical Stuff

Audio /Video Quality: The technical aspects are surprisingly good. The audio is clear and nicely balanced. There’s a couple minor background noises and you get to hear Audrey get a couple instructions, but that’s about it for audio problems. The video is much the same. The lighting gives the action a very natural look, but there is a little grain.

Music: There’s some loud music during the strip tease, but that’s it.

Bullshit, Borderline, and Boneheaded Advertising: As usual, Anarchy has earned itself a half point penalty against the overall rating due to their advertising claims. They’re so consistent with it that by now I really think they deserve an enema from a fire hose. The front cover lists features of Multi-Angle, Extremely Interactive, Strip Tease, Foot Job, Titty Job, Multiple Toys, Hand Job, Skull Fucking, Supercore, Tease Menu, Shot Exclusively for DVD, Point of View (P.O.V.), and Different Sex Positions, while the back cover lists Get to Know Audrey, Multiple Preview Trailers, Photo Shoot, Bloopers, Behind the Scenes, Digital Stereo Sound, Multiple Layer Menus, Website Access, All Region Coding, and PC DVD-ROM Compatable. Surprisingly, all of the features listed on the back cover are there, although the photo shoot is a featurette rather than the normal photo gallery people will expect. There’s also some truth to the front cover claims, such as the strip tease, foot job, and titty job (although Anarchy can’t quite master spelling “titty” in their menus). There’s also a bit of skull fucking, but you have to find it on your own because Anarchy doesn’t give you a selection to make finding it easy.

For the Bullshit portion of the cover, there’s Multi-Angle, Extremely Interactive, Tease Menu, and Hand Job. There’s multiple angle icons in the menus, but the multiple angle feature was never activated as far as I could find. This is nothing new for Anarchy, who seems to think having more than one camera on a shoot means it’s a multi-angle presentation. If that’s true, then almost every decently made porno out there is a multi-angle DVD. The same can be said for the claim of being extremely interactive, as I don’t think there are as many interactive choices here as in virtual sex releases done by most other companies. You don’t get to choose between moods for Audrey, camera angles, or anything else special to tailor the scene to your tastes. This barely qualifies as an interactive DVD, let alone an Extremely Interactive one, and Anarchy’s repeated use of this claim has raised it up from the borderline things to the bullshit side of things. The same can be said for the tease menu claim, as you never get the chance to choose how Audrey’s going to tease you. Everybody else out there seems to think a tease menu lets you choose what part of her body to tease you with, but you never get anything close to that. You get Audrey stripping down and playing with her tits in one selection and the next brings it to the foreplay and masturbation side of things. To finish off the bullshit claims, I couldn’t find an option for a hand job anywhere in the movie.

For the borderline side of things, there’s Multiple Toys, Different Sex Positions, and Point of View (P.O.V.). The Different Toys claim implies that you get to choose which toy Audrey uses (such as Smash did in My Playtoy 3) and when she uses it. Yes, she does have two different toys, but you never get any choice in which one she uses or when she uses it. I’m not sure which meaning of Different Sex Positions Anarchy means here. If they mean you have several positions to choose from, then it’s a stupid claim. If it means there’s positions here that you won’t see anywhere else, then it seems like a bullshit claim a I think I’ve seen all these positions elsewhere. Finally, there’s the POV claim. There is a fair amount of POV footage, when it got to the sex one of the first things I saw was Otto’s ass. I also saw it several other times through the movie, and for some reason when I think of a POV perspective (especially if it’s going to be listed prominently on the cover), I don’t expect to see a guy’s asshole! You also get a great view of Audrey’s front (and a little of Otto’s face) while she rides him reverse cowgirl style.

Finally, for the boneheaded side of things there’s Supercore and Shot Exclusively for DVD. We’ll start at the end first, as I don’t know of anybody making a virtual VHS release. If there were other formats for this type of feature it would be one thing, but listing it here just makes it seem like somebody was trying to toot their own horn without having much to toot it about. Then there’s the Supercore claim. Making up words for the front cover just doesn’t seem like too intelligent of an idea. Or possibly this a sexual act that I just haven’t heard of. Maybe it’s just me, but I can’t remember the last time I’ve heard a girl want somebody to “supercore” her.

Menus: The main menu just gives you a clip of the cover photo and the choices. It’s a nice shot of Audrey, but gives the first impression of a cheap DVD without a lot of knowhow. I’ll skip past the interactive menus here and cover those in the main body of the review.

The Feature

Since she exploded on the porn scene, redhead Audrey Hollander has been turning heads. Sure, some of it’s because she’s cute as a button and has a killer natural body, but just as much is that there isn’t much sexually she looks like she won’t do. Once again, Anarchy has landed one of the freshest and most popular stars around for their dismal interactive line.

Not surprisingly, Audrey does a fantastic job with the sex in the movie. She puts plenty of energy into the sex and seems to get into everything in the movie. She does a great job of playing to the camera as if it’s her partner, and never does so in a way that feels like she’s mugging it. Audrey goes from a nice strip tease through some decent masturbation with both fingers and toys for each of her holes. She works “you” over with her feet, tits, and mouth, and isn’t afraid to get nasty during the sex. Audrey takes vaginal and anal alone, and then adds the toy to Otto’s cock for a standard double penetration, a double pussy penetration, and a double anal penetration. She even takes a triple penetration with a toy in each hole and Otto’s cock in her ass as well as eight fingers in her at the same time. She takes the time to suck her ass off a cock and the toys several times and swallows down her facial when it arrives. She’s nicely vocal and energetic through all of it, and it’s easy to see why she has such a following. Audrey does a great and nasty job!

Cumshots always get a lot of attention in interactive DVDs, and Anarchy hasn’t changed anything about theirs from release to release. This is a good and bad thing. On the good side, the pop shot is real rather than going with some fake looking goo or a cartoon pop. On the bad side, it’s the pop shot, as in there’s only one pop shot in the entire movie. I don’t think I’m alone in wanting a pop for each position that you can jump to, but I’d much rather have it this way than going with the fake goo or cartoon pops. The pop is a blessing and a curse.

As usual, the main problem is on Anarchy’s technical end of things. Basically, they don’t seem to have the knowledge or care to do a good virtual interactive sex DVD. Rather than using sex loops where you control all the action, like almost all of the other interactive virtual sex DVDs out there, they work a chapter menu into the screen. When I think of an interactive virtual sex DVD, I want to control all the action. If I want to watch the girl fuck her ass with a dildo, she’s going to do that until I tell her otherwise. Here, the segments run one after another just like any other porn scene. If you want to go somewhere else, you can go there with the chapter menu on the left side of the screen. If you want to keep watching the girl fuck her ass with a dildo, every time the scene moves on you have to use that chapter menu to go back to the anal dildo section. This is not a good thing.

The chapter menu / interactive control also has other problems. To start with, it’s a bit hard to read due to the font and it’s large enough to cover up some of the action. Thankfully, there isn’t a lot that’s covered up. The bigger problem with it is that it doesn’t do a good job of letting you know where you’re going or what you’re going to get. In the masturbation segments, you’re given selections such as Masturbation and Play with Toys, each of which supposedly have multiple angles. Audrey works over both her holes in both segments, but you never know what she’s going to do when you make a selection because one “angle” might be anal and another might be vaginal. Sexually you have choices of Pussy Fuck, Anal, Doggie Style, Cowgirl, Reverse Cowgirl, ATM, Pile Drive, and Supercore. To get the mystery of Supercore out of the way, basically that’s Audrey at her nastiest taking most of her double penetrations, the triple penetrations, and eight of Otto’s fingers inside her. As for the rest of it, Pussy Fuck and Anal are both in missionary. I can only guess that “missionary” is too big of a word for the people at Anarchy to spell, and the cost of a dictionary is above and beyond their budget. The rest of the positions mix anal and doggie, so you never know what you’re going to get. Even the ATM section is mostly sex with very little ass to mouth, and it seems trivial because Audrey takes the ass to mouth repeatedly through the movie. The menus are supposed to be there so that you can control the action, but due to a combination of the sex being too spontaneous or disorganized, they often seem close to useless.

Playing With Audrey Hollander is a very strong and very weak title at the same time. Sexually, Audrey makes it very strong and does a fantastic job. I couldn’t help but think that if this was released just as one big long scene without the interactive crap that this would have been a very good release. Unfortunately, the virtual and interactive aspects are so weak that it holds things back tremendously. Although Audrey gives a jaw dropping performance, Anarchy’s job on the virtual aspect hold the feature back to being average at best. Audrey Hollander deserves a lot better than the hack job Anarchy did on her, and hopefully a competent studio sees Playing With Audrey Hollander and will decide to give her a virtual sex DVD worthy of her talents.

The Extra Stuff

Trailers are included for Anal Life, Border Hoppers, No Cum Spitting, Pop That Cherry 5, and Twisted. There’s also several featurettes, including an interview with Audrey, a photo shoot featurette, and a behind the scenes / bloopers featurette. Finally, there’s internet and mail order information.

Get to Know Audrey lasts about eight and a quarter minutes and captures several short interviews with Audrey. She talks about the fun of shooting the feature as well as her love of rainy days. She talks a little about meeting fans in Vegas and gives a few comments about how happy she was with the sex. Finally, she talks about their married life, fucking like bunnies, gardening, and martinis. It’s a nice little collection of comments from Audrey, and worth checking out if you’re a fan or just curious about her.

The photo shoot lasts about four and a half minutes. You get to see and hear what goes on as Audrey poses for photos in a few of her outfits. It’s a nice little featurette, but at the same time seems odd because there’s no photo gallery included on the DVD.

The behind the scenes / bloopers lasts nearly three minutes. You get to see Audrey as she does a few lines, shoots some of the sex, and gets shined up for her photo shoot. It’s a nice little collection of cut footage that wouldn’t make it in the movie.

The Down -n- Dirty Sex Stuff

Themes: Straight, interactive, tease, masturbation, toys, anal, ass to mouth, foot job, titty fucking, DP (with cock and toy), DPP (with cock and toy), DAP (with cock and toy), triple penetration (with cock and toys), and swallowing

Raincoat Factor: Very high unless you expect to have a lot of control of Audrey, in case it drops back quite a bit

Condom Usage: None

The Bottom Line:

Currently, many of Anarchy’s virtual sex DVDs can be found online for between about $10 and $25 with most stores offering them for under $20. At the low end this one will be worth it for Audrey Hollander fans, but virtual sex fans will want to give it a rental first. Audrey’s amazing, but the virtual aspect is primitive as hell. The technical aspects aren’t too bad, and there’s a bit of effort put into the extras.

Note to Anarchy: I know I’m probably wasting my time requesting that you treat your customers honestly rather than like a bunch of idiots. By now I doubt that anybody would complain if somebody had you sodomized by a rabid rottweiler due to how you’ve lied to people on your covers. It would also be nice to see you give credit to the people involved in the DVD, such as the male talent and the directors. They put a lot of work into releases like this, so it’s only fair to give them a little recognition for it.

If you have any questions or comments, please e-mail me .

Other reviews by Astroknight