No Cum Dodging Allowed 3 (Red Light District) Review
Red Light District
Studio: Red Light District
Directed by: Mike John
Starring: Brian Surewood, Jon Dough, Mickey G., Erik Everhard, Tony T., Steve Holmes, Mike John, Billy Banks, Juan Cuba, Lauren Phoenix, Jake Malone, Katsuni, Roxy Jezel, Missy Monroe, Tone Capone, Tee Reel, Cris Taliana
Released on: 5/6/2004
dragonsbum's ratings for this movie:
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Reviewed by dragonsbum on 5/29/2004
opening statement: ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this one is an absolute ball drainer. it's so fucking great that dragon has done permanent damage interfering with himself; an acquired phimosis and priapism, concomitantly, to be exact. i mean what could be a more convincing testimonial- i have messed up my gonads due to the extreme uncontrollable arousal experienced while reviewing this video.
and i'm not even a big mike john or swallowing fan. when the ratio of cock to female is greater then 3 to 1, as it is in most of his productions, i am usually not interested. plus i have always felt cum looks better on the face than in the mouth. typically, i 've rented his titles for the spectacle, not the sex; but that all changes with this edition. this 3 hour long meisterwork is supersaturated with enthusiastic and depraved sexual carnage, featuring 5 young honeys who are virtuosos in the art of suck, fuck, and swallow. as the evidence will show, each scene will give you a happy.
exhibit A: the angelic pig-tailed cris taliana kneels before 2 cocks wearing a small white top and daisy dukes. she eagerly sucks them to completion, but as she is still hungry, 6 more lucky cocks appear to be serviced. attacking each dick voraciously and employing ancient chinese spit and jerk technique, cris is soon fed a mouthful of cum that she gargles and swallows with that brilliant smile of hers. time to fuck as a mattress is laid down in a bare room and 4 men arrive to ravage her cleanly shaven pussy. they start off in doggie which really affords magnificent views of cris' tight and shapely arse. she enjoys getting face fucked in mish but it's RC where she really gets orgasmic. after taking turns spooning the guys deliver 4 loads of love; but that's not all. a brief cowgirl ensues before she is passed around midair for sum standing coitus. cris asks for more healthy cum and the guys respond by depositing 4 more big batters of DNA in her mouth, which she again consumes like it's cotton candy. i recall first seeing miss taliana in Flesh Hunter 4 where she nearly stole the entire show and being mighty impressed. here she further develops a spirited approach to porn that is fun and hot. no anal, but her enthusiastic girl power attitude and 17 total pops swallowed compensates for the omission. cris is clearly an ingenue who will only improve with time.
exhibit B: the camera pans up some long legs to a big beautiful butt in a black thong. why, it's buttwoman herself, lauren phoenix, who asks rhetorically if we like this ass; um, hells yeah. again a mat is dropped on the floor in a bare white walled room, although there is a ladder in the background to create a vertical element in the framing. lauren aggressively attacks her 2 partners' cocks as if the stanley cup depended upon it- gagging and just opening up her mouth to be fucked . after RC, she gets on all 4's for some excellent doggie; (with her black heels still on) lauren presses her legs together, accentuating the fullness and roundness of that dope derriere. soon her asshole is plundered and she gulps her first 2 loads. cut to lauren being sandwiched in cowgirl DP, featuring some excellent shots of her equally pretty face. quite commanding she is, and when she says 'fuck me', she really means it. the guys switch places for RC DP, provide lauren with several A2M which she seems to relish, before supplying her with a final treat which she gargles and makes disappear. well i must say, this is one of the best 2 on 1 scenes i've ever encountered. phoenix is definitely rising- this amazonian dirty blonde slut can revive any bored gonzo porn consumer with her for unlawful carnal knowledge.
exhibit C: katsumi. katsumi. katsumi. the simply exquisite frenchnamese teases in a black lacy number, pulling her panties off and fingering herself. then cut to a long shot of her entering stage right to find 4 guys standing in a row. kat says 'nice to meet you' and immediately drops to her knees to deepthroat a big meat popsicle. going down the line she gets face fucked before being surrounded for some POV BJ action. her top is pulled down revealing those wonderfully taut titty kakas and she gets RC and face slapped with cock. keeping her heelsl on, she succumbs to mish on a couch and down on the floor, katsumi takes her first DP in cowgirl. kat looks especially good when she goes air tight, her long dark hair getting dishevelled and wet as she is pumped full of penis. there's more DP in RC before the fellowship takes turns fucking, pulling out, and popping in her pretty little mouth. not satiated, katsumi gets standing DP which really highlights her tiny lithe body in motion. soon the guys feed her a big mouthful of jizz, which she of course swallows with delight saying it's a 'good breakfast.' there is something wonderful about katsumi. perhaps it's the way she stares intensely at the guys, kinda like ingrid bergman did with her leading men; or it's simply her exotic allure consisting of that sexy accent, geometrically perfect facial features, and totally killer body.
exhibit D: missy monroe is new to me. i'm trying to think of who she looks like- a little like michelle williams from dawson's creek, or better yet, keri lynn pratt (from my favorite melissa joan hart movie 'Drive Me Crazy'). anyway, missy is a very cute short haired blonde with big natural boobs that look marvelous in a hot pink fishnet top. she still has a little baby fat and her ass could use some toning, but that voluptous figure is quite fetching. missy starts things by sucking off 4 guys in the round, the POV camera work is excellent as they form a plus sign of cock over her face. quickly she swallows sum crystal seed before moving onto a couch for RC. the white heels are kept on and she is totally shaven; yee hahh, they slap her bountiful bosoms. missy turns around for cowgirl, revealing a bad tat of her name on her pelvis, then gets standing doggie with one foot upon the couch. now the real fun starts because missy claims this is her first anal experience as her starfish gets opened up. missy is very encouraging so the guys soon DP her on the couch in RC. there's some excellent breast jiggling to accompany her very demonstrative vocal mix which includes: oww, oh yeah, oh god, ahhh ohh, and fuck. things heat up even more as they move onto the floor for cowgirl DP and missy again goes airtight, looking way too hot with her hair all over her face during the BJ. as a reward, the guys present her with 4 humongous blasts of ball batter which she gargles and downs like fresca. well to say that i'm thoroughly impressed with this slut in training is an understatement. there are plenty of big boobed blondes out there but miss monroe wins me over with her willingness and slight awkardness.
exhibit E: lascivious brunette roxy, sheathed in a red lace teddy, says she needs an 'english breakfast' and is accomodated with 2 large black cocks. she sucks them off and swallows goo before walking into the hallway where she gaggs herself on 2 more pieces of dark meat. 2 more loads but still hungry, so roxy saunters into the bathroom, slips off the lingerie, sits on the toilet, and is met by yet another pair of black hambones. quickly disposing of their cum, she moves onto a bed where she is surrounded by 4 males of the caucasian persuasion. roxy starts out in RC, her shaven and tiny twat being filled to capacity. the doggie reveals how nice a bum she has, especially with her knees together that tight tanned arse looks better than fresh fish n' chips. 4 pops are delivered and ingested before roxy initiates the DP in cowgirl, goes airtight, and performs A2M. the wankers switch off to RC DP as she continuously moans moans simulataneously of pleasure and pain. take a butcher's (look) at the stupendous standing DP with great up and under shots. the final round of jolly good jism finds its way into her awaiting orifice and roxy swallows with aplomb. this brittish odalisque has a do anything you want to me-type attitude that is highly erotic. with her feline-ish facial features and a superior bod seemingly designed for fucking, roxy brings us to a brilliant cumpletion.
there you have it, an instant classic, case closed. 5 great scenes, 5 great chicks, some 50 loads swallowed, captured in a highly competent, unobtrusive manner. mike john knows what to lens, centering the attention on the girls and frequently panning on to their faces. he uses a minimum of cuts, shows plenty of insertion shots, and moves the camera just enough without being 'artistic.' also, i will say that the sequence of scenes is smartly arranged to emphasize the diversity of the performers: the small dark haired cris, then the statuesque blonde lauren, followed by tres petite katsumi, the busty blonde missy, and finally the brown haired gymnast-built roxy. what the girls do share in common is high energy, eagerness, and good ole sexiness. and that, members of the jury, are the components of great porn.
now just a word about the male talent. usually i identify the guys because they are important, but in this case, they're really just sperm donors so i didn't feel it was imperative to do so; and anyhow they're the usual suspects in the RLD stud stable. mike john also frames his shots such that the men are usually decapitated, which in 1 on 1 scenes might be annoying, but is effective here. nevertheless, the guys do a great job of providing ample and viscous dollops of cum.
in terms of the technical qualities of the disc, the audio and visual are very clear and meet my high expectations. there are some minor lighting issues in lauren's scene, probably due to shooting against plain white walls, but it doesn't hamper your enjoyment. numerous chapter stops make convenient navigation possible. in terms of extras: a 22 minute behind the scenes provides insight into the personalities of our 5 vixens and includes some extracurricular sex, a 27 minute cumshot loop, and a 4 minute self-advancing picture gallery with sound. no trailers, but considering the fact that the movie is already 3 hours, it's no big friggin deal.
closing statement: mike john, i applaud you for producing a great piece of smut that i'll be using to abuse myself for a long time to cum; in fact, let dragon rear up and give you a 25 minute standing ovation. okay i'm back. so to some it all up, there's no reasonable doubt- this is one to own. thanks for your attention.
i'm lonely tonite
you must cum, i cant' cum, i'll cum - beckett
and i'm not even a big mike john or swallowing fan. when the ratio of cock to female is greater then 3 to 1, as it is in most of his productions, i am usually not interested. plus i have always felt cum looks better on the face than in the mouth. typically, i 've rented his titles for the spectacle, not the sex; but that all changes with this edition. this 3 hour long meisterwork is supersaturated with enthusiastic and depraved sexual carnage, featuring 5 young honeys who are virtuosos in the art of suck, fuck, and swallow. as the evidence will show, each scene will give you a happy.
exhibit A: the angelic pig-tailed cris taliana kneels before 2 cocks wearing a small white top and daisy dukes. she eagerly sucks them to completion, but as she is still hungry, 6 more lucky cocks appear to be serviced. attacking each dick voraciously and employing ancient chinese spit and jerk technique, cris is soon fed a mouthful of cum that she gargles and swallows with that brilliant smile of hers. time to fuck as a mattress is laid down in a bare room and 4 men arrive to ravage her cleanly shaven pussy. they start off in doggie which really affords magnificent views of cris' tight and shapely arse. she enjoys getting face fucked in mish but it's RC where she really gets orgasmic. after taking turns spooning the guys deliver 4 loads of love; but that's not all. a brief cowgirl ensues before she is passed around midair for sum standing coitus. cris asks for more healthy cum and the guys respond by depositing 4 more big batters of DNA in her mouth, which she again consumes like it's cotton candy. i recall first seeing miss taliana in Flesh Hunter 4 where she nearly stole the entire show and being mighty impressed. here she further develops a spirited approach to porn that is fun and hot. no anal, but her enthusiastic girl power attitude and 17 total pops swallowed compensates for the omission. cris is clearly an ingenue who will only improve with time.
exhibit B: the camera pans up some long legs to a big beautiful butt in a black thong. why, it's buttwoman herself, lauren phoenix, who asks rhetorically if we like this ass; um, hells yeah. again a mat is dropped on the floor in a bare white walled room, although there is a ladder in the background to create a vertical element in the framing. lauren aggressively attacks her 2 partners' cocks as if the stanley cup depended upon it- gagging and just opening up her mouth to be fucked . after RC, she gets on all 4's for some excellent doggie; (with her black heels still on) lauren presses her legs together, accentuating the fullness and roundness of that dope derriere. soon her asshole is plundered and she gulps her first 2 loads. cut to lauren being sandwiched in cowgirl DP, featuring some excellent shots of her equally pretty face. quite commanding she is, and when she says 'fuck me', she really means it. the guys switch places for RC DP, provide lauren with several A2M which she seems to relish, before supplying her with a final treat which she gargles and makes disappear. well i must say, this is one of the best 2 on 1 scenes i've ever encountered. phoenix is definitely rising- this amazonian dirty blonde slut can revive any bored gonzo porn consumer with her for unlawful carnal knowledge.
exhibit C: katsumi. katsumi. katsumi. the simply exquisite frenchnamese teases in a black lacy number, pulling her panties off and fingering herself. then cut to a long shot of her entering stage right to find 4 guys standing in a row. kat says 'nice to meet you' and immediately drops to her knees to deepthroat a big meat popsicle. going down the line she gets face fucked before being surrounded for some POV BJ action. her top is pulled down revealing those wonderfully taut titty kakas and she gets RC and face slapped with cock. keeping her heelsl on, she succumbs to mish on a couch and down on the floor, katsumi takes her first DP in cowgirl. kat looks especially good when she goes air tight, her long dark hair getting dishevelled and wet as she is pumped full of penis. there's more DP in RC before the fellowship takes turns fucking, pulling out, and popping in her pretty little mouth. not satiated, katsumi gets standing DP which really highlights her tiny lithe body in motion. soon the guys feed her a big mouthful of jizz, which she of course swallows with delight saying it's a 'good breakfast.' there is something wonderful about katsumi. perhaps it's the way she stares intensely at the guys, kinda like ingrid bergman did with her leading men; or it's simply her exotic allure consisting of that sexy accent, geometrically perfect facial features, and totally killer body.
exhibit D: missy monroe is new to me. i'm trying to think of who she looks like- a little like michelle williams from dawson's creek, or better yet, keri lynn pratt (from my favorite melissa joan hart movie 'Drive Me Crazy'). anyway, missy is a very cute short haired blonde with big natural boobs that look marvelous in a hot pink fishnet top. she still has a little baby fat and her ass could use some toning, but that voluptous figure is quite fetching. missy starts things by sucking off 4 guys in the round, the POV camera work is excellent as they form a plus sign of cock over her face. quickly she swallows sum crystal seed before moving onto a couch for RC. the white heels are kept on and she is totally shaven; yee hahh, they slap her bountiful bosoms. missy turns around for cowgirl, revealing a bad tat of her name on her pelvis, then gets standing doggie with one foot upon the couch. now the real fun starts because missy claims this is her first anal experience as her starfish gets opened up. missy is very encouraging so the guys soon DP her on the couch in RC. there's some excellent breast jiggling to accompany her very demonstrative vocal mix which includes: oww, oh yeah, oh god, ahhh ohh, and fuck. things heat up even more as they move onto the floor for cowgirl DP and missy again goes airtight, looking way too hot with her hair all over her face during the BJ. as a reward, the guys present her with 4 humongous blasts of ball batter which she gargles and downs like fresca. well to say that i'm thoroughly impressed with this slut in training is an understatement. there are plenty of big boobed blondes out there but miss monroe wins me over with her willingness and slight awkardness.
exhibit E: lascivious brunette roxy, sheathed in a red lace teddy, says she needs an 'english breakfast' and is accomodated with 2 large black cocks. she sucks them off and swallows goo before walking into the hallway where she gaggs herself on 2 more pieces of dark meat. 2 more loads but still hungry, so roxy saunters into the bathroom, slips off the lingerie, sits on the toilet, and is met by yet another pair of black hambones. quickly disposing of their cum, she moves onto a bed where she is surrounded by 4 males of the caucasian persuasion. roxy starts out in RC, her shaven and tiny twat being filled to capacity. the doggie reveals how nice a bum she has, especially with her knees together that tight tanned arse looks better than fresh fish n' chips. 4 pops are delivered and ingested before roxy initiates the DP in cowgirl, goes airtight, and performs A2M. the wankers switch off to RC DP as she continuously moans moans simulataneously of pleasure and pain. take a butcher's (look) at the stupendous standing DP with great up and under shots. the final round of jolly good jism finds its way into her awaiting orifice and roxy swallows with aplomb. this brittish odalisque has a do anything you want to me-type attitude that is highly erotic. with her feline-ish facial features and a superior bod seemingly designed for fucking, roxy brings us to a brilliant cumpletion.
there you have it, an instant classic, case closed. 5 great scenes, 5 great chicks, some 50 loads swallowed, captured in a highly competent, unobtrusive manner. mike john knows what to lens, centering the attention on the girls and frequently panning on to their faces. he uses a minimum of cuts, shows plenty of insertion shots, and moves the camera just enough without being 'artistic.' also, i will say that the sequence of scenes is smartly arranged to emphasize the diversity of the performers: the small dark haired cris, then the statuesque blonde lauren, followed by tres petite katsumi, the busty blonde missy, and finally the brown haired gymnast-built roxy. what the girls do share in common is high energy, eagerness, and good ole sexiness. and that, members of the jury, are the components of great porn.
now just a word about the male talent. usually i identify the guys because they are important, but in this case, they're really just sperm donors so i didn't feel it was imperative to do so; and anyhow they're the usual suspects in the RLD stud stable. mike john also frames his shots such that the men are usually decapitated, which in 1 on 1 scenes might be annoying, but is effective here. nevertheless, the guys do a great job of providing ample and viscous dollops of cum.
in terms of the technical qualities of the disc, the audio and visual are very clear and meet my high expectations. there are some minor lighting issues in lauren's scene, probably due to shooting against plain white walls, but it doesn't hamper your enjoyment. numerous chapter stops make convenient navigation possible. in terms of extras: a 22 minute behind the scenes provides insight into the personalities of our 5 vixens and includes some extracurricular sex, a 27 minute cumshot loop, and a 4 minute self-advancing picture gallery with sound. no trailers, but considering the fact that the movie is already 3 hours, it's no big friggin deal.
closing statement: mike john, i applaud you for producing a great piece of smut that i'll be using to abuse myself for a long time to cum; in fact, let dragon rear up and give you a 25 minute standing ovation. okay i'm back. so to some it all up, there's no reasonable doubt- this is one to own. thanks for your attention.
i'm lonely tonite
you must cum, i cant' cum, i'll cum - beckett
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