Matrixxx, The Review

Reviewed by Joe Shaver  on  6/29/2004

Burroughs (Burrows?) played by Jim Slade wants to win The Matrix, a bodybuilding championship. Knowing that Anthony (Tony Cage) is a “fag”—to use Slade’s offensive word—Jim decides to offer up his hole in order to get last year’s winner out of the competition. A gym provides the setting and, after a workout, Jim goes down on Tony’s cock. Tony is quite a handsome hunk. Except for his head there is not a hair to be found anywhere on his magnificent body. His stiff dick sticks out from a bare crotch; his anus winks at us from a smooth crack. Jim gives both an oral workout. Tony does the same for Jim and then fucks him. Although he is quite buff, Jim doesn’t have the looks or personality to turn me on; but he is quite a willing performer—as we shall see. Tony shoots a great load on Jim’s face, after which Jim sucks the scummy cock. (He spits the cum out though. Shame on you, Jim!) Jim’s own load—if you can call it that—is about 1/8th of a teaspoon. Jim tells us this plan to get Tony to withdraw from the contest failed. So, it’s back to the drawing board for removing Tony. Meanwhile there are others Jim wishes to eliminate.

Jay Poison is the next to be eliminated. There is a line in Boys in the Band about someone in the gym blowing himself up like a poisoned frog, and I couldn’t help but think of that with Jay’s name and physique. This guy is huge and has a samurai pigtail. He does the traditional bodybuilder poses for the camera before settling down to play with his dick. He pulls those massive cheeks apart to show us his anus and then sticks a clear dildo into it. He later changes to a longer—but no thicker—model. He shoots a load that is worthy of his bulk. Jim tells us that Jay was thrown out of the contest when some minors observed his “perverse behavior” and Jay was arrested.

Jim's next worry is Trey Rexx. Tall, blond, handsome, and with a great build, Trey is certainly one for Jim to worry about. So, Jim sends Tony Valentine to bribe Trey with cash and cock. Valentine gives Rexx both. Tony Valentine with his shaved head and five o’clock shadow is a real stunner. Too bad he has such an offensive patter. I was constantly cringing throughout his scene. As Trey is sucking Tony, Stefan Milos wanders in and watches. Stefan is gorgeous! He’s a young bodybuilder who looks like a muscular Matthew Broderick. (see the back cover of the DVD) Not yet too bulked up, Stefan is just right. Now that he has an audience, Tony proceeds to fuck Trey. I’m torn between watching the youthful stud jack off, or watching Valentine getting it on with Rexx. Luckily, director Blake makes the right decisions for me. Stefan finally shows us his stiff uncut cock just as Trey sits down on Tony’s. Tony keeps calling Stefan “girl” as he yells over to him. (Hell, if girls looked like Stefan, I’d be straight!) Stefan plays with his asshole with a spit-slick finger as Tony fucks a bent-over Rexx. Of course, everyone cums.

Jim now tries once again to eliminate Tony Cage. He tells us now that Tony is a recovering alcoholic so he arranges to have a case of beer and a cute delivery boy sent to Tony’s home. The cute delivery boy is the delectable Jeremy Jordan. This young performer is one talented petite sexpot. After observing Jeremy as actor and writer of Falcon’s DEEP SOUTH, a friend wrote me declaring that Jeremy was an “artist”. He may be right. You might think so too when you see what he does to Tony’s hairless dick. He’s a fierce little rimmer, as well. On top of all that, he’s a great bottom with a dick that never goes down either when he’s sucking a dick or being fucked by one. They change positions simply by swirling Jeremy around on Tony’s embedded cock. At one point he holds the boy in his arms, then lays him back onto the table to bring them both to climax.

We are told that Tony went off his diet and now Jim only has to get in good with the judge to win the contest. “I’ve always wanted to fuck a white boy,” judge Dan Packin proclaims. Dan is packin’ a big black uncut rod and Jims starts sucking. Dan picks up his cell phone and calls his buddy Flex-Deon Blake to come over and join them. Jim now has two big black boners to contend with. Jims sucks and rims both and then offers up his ass. Flex is the first to fuck him. After Dan has had his turn, they double-fuck him.

By hook and by crook, Jim wins the trophy. But after watching that scene with Jeremy Jordan, I can’t help believing that the real winner is Tony Cage.

If you like muscle studs, you’ll love this film. Even if you are not a fan of the big boys, you’ll find much to enjoy. The only thing I disliked was the use of derogatory words such as: “fag” “girl” “bitch” “ pervert” “perverse behavior”, etc. This is bad enough when gays call themselves such names, but when these epithets come from the mouths of a straight actor like Tony Valentine, or a bi-sexual one like Jim Slade, I find them to be extremely offensive and totally unnecessary (even for dramatic purposes). It is to be hoped that Blue Blake will be more sensitive about offending some viewers in future films.