Explosions (Mayhem) Review

Reviewed by dragonsbum  on  4/23/2004

"Man is something that shall be overcum."

"I love him who lives to cum, and who wants to cum."

"Of all that is written, I love only what a man has written with his cum."

- Thus Spoke Zarathustra

i suppose my fascination with facials stems from the fact that i have never had the privilege of delivering one in the course of sexual congress; i have given myself facials, but it's just not the same. the anabolic cumshots series let me live vicariously, plastering the visages of gorgeous eurosluts in rapid fire succession. unfortunately, no fucking is shown to maximize the number of shots. however, the sodomonia slopshots series, which also draws from a deep talent pool, employs the format of one minute fucking and then the cumshot. less total cum flying, but the tradeoff is worth it. how does mayhem explosions compare?

the good: every scene has its own chapter, up to chapter 99 which contains the last 4 scenes. about a quarter of the scenes have multiple cumshots. there are several pleasing instances of swallowing and cum farting. in general, the cumshots are average to good, with the mandatory few duds. the camera lingers so we can appreciate the aftermath.

the bad: the first 25 chapters are 18 minutes- very little penetration. the next 25 chp are 35 min- minimal action. the next 25 chp are 44 min- now we get to see a respectable amount of fucking. the next 24 chp are 25 min- return back to basically just the jizz. chapter 99 is 14 min- sum intercourse. bottomline- this inconsistent format was quite frustrating.

the girls in this video are never identified, nor are the original scenes from which these cumshots have been culled. i will mention some names- flick, katja, ashley blue, haley, honey, arianna, bridgette, sophia, victoria, brandi lyons, crystal ray, melanie jagger, lauren phoenix and aurora. ashley and/or angel long appear about 7 times (by the way, does anybody think angel is significantly more attractive than ashley?). i do not recall any women of color, and very few asians. the talent pool is too homogenous, or american if you like, but i guess that's mayhem.

in terms of specific acts, there are very few scenes with: girls jacking off guys, cum swapping, or creampies. there is a lot of guys wanking and instead of internal pops, many scenes (perhaps 20) involve anal fucking, often in piledriver, pullout and cumshot onto the asshole, with sum of the cum pushed in or finger sampled by the ladies. there is also a disturbing paucity of posthead cleanup.

in terms of technicals, the chaptering is off by 2 or 3 seconds for the majority of the scenes. i suppose that's not too big a deal, considering every scene is its own chapter, but this is ridiculous in 2004. the sound quality is rather uneven, nearly muted in some cases. while the picture is clear, the color seems muted, skin tones are not well reproduced.

and the coup de grace is the cover art. fraud is defined as: a deception deliberately practiced in order to secure unfair gain. mayhem has committed the most egregious fraud by doctoring the cover- strategically placed globs of man goo adorn the pretty faces of aurora snow and lauren phoenix. goto chapter 87 and witness a single cock delivering a meagre load into aurora's mouth, with minor chin dribbage, and a very mediocre cum swap. where is all the cum on lauren's forehead, cheeks, tongue, and chin that are so prominently displayed on the cover? for shame, for shame. my choice to purchase this disc was mainly informed by the promise of seeing those 2 cum covered countenances. duped. wiccckkaaah.

the ugly: this was a rather disappointing disc. some of the middle chapters were entertaining and modestly wankable. when will we realize that quality is always more important than quantity? and how hard is it to make id title cards for each scene? the extras sucked- 5 trailers and some sex talk ads. in terms of the cumshots sensu strictu, there were many above average pops, but not many "explosions." any jules vid will have bigger and messier facials. plus no girl takes more then say 3 facials; ashley blue does take 8 popshots but they are to the groinal area. for the ardent fan of cock vomit, this compilation will likely fall well short of expectations. thanks for your attention. fuck the fcc.