Creampie Surprise 9 (Hundies) Review

Reviewed by Anime Nut  on  12/4/2009

As you may have gathered from the title, Creampie Surprise Volume 9 is the latest DVD collecting scenes from the website of the same name. If you're not familiar with the series, the premise is simple: Boy meets girl. Girl expresses dislike of creampies. Boy fucks girl. Boy cums inside girl. Girl is surprised, usually gets mad. Every scene follows this formula, without fail.

Since this is essentially a compilation of material previously shot for the website, it suffers from the usual problems: uneven audio between scenes, inconsistent camera work because of the different directors, and a complete lack of opening and closing credits. At least the packaging looks nice, with nice photos of the lovely Stephanie Cane and Kenzi Marie gracing the cover. All scenes are presented in 4:3 aspect ratio. Picture quality is good, but you really do miss the widescreen ratio during some of the close-ups. More on that later.

The main problem with the creampie genre continues to be the unforgiveable use of fake internals. Do these producers honestly believe their target audience hasn't seen enough sperm loads up close to know when they're being duped? If you know anybody that spits bright, perfectly white cream out of his dick, I'd like to meet him. Thankfully, there are a couple scenes in this title that do appear to feature the real deal. If they're also fake, then compliments to the chef.

SEX SCENES

SCENE 1 - Kenzi Marie & Jack Vegas
Approx. 25 min
Boy/Girl

As the scene opens, Kenzi is being interviewed by the man behind the camera. Wearing a black dress and boots, Kenzi declares she does not let guys come in her, because birth control causes her to break out. She prefers the guy to pull out. Gee, I wonder how this scene will end? Anyways, we cut to Jack's entrance with his jeans pulled down, ready to get blown. Kenzie is now nude, save for her boots. What happened to the striptease? Not a good start.

Kenzie is easily the most talented blowjob artist of the girls on this DVD. She deepthroats with ease, drools saliva without fear of dehydration, and takes the time to suck Jack's whole scrotum into her mouth. During reverse cowgirl vaginal, Kenzi thrusts down hard on Jack's cock, then mixes in some sweet grinding. Jack does a good job keeping up, but it's obvious Kenzi is in the driver's seat.

The camerawork is uninspired, to say the least. The angles barely change, so each position seems to go on forever. The entire doggystyle vaginal sequence is shot from the side of the performers, so you can't even see the area of penetration. The creampie is way too thick and white to be real. At least Kenzi does a fine acting job with her reaction.

SCENE 2 - Nikki Anne & Jean Pierre
Approx. 24 min
Boy/Girl

Let me get this out of the way: Nikki Anne is insanely cute. I've never seen her in anything else, and I have no idea if she's even still active. I loved watching her charm my pants off (literally) during the interview so much, that it was almost a shame when they had to start fucking. Oh well. As Jean Pierre rubs her nipples, Nikki just flashes a million-watt smile and giggles. This girl is too much.

As the real action starts, I noticed the camerawork was markedly improved. Lots of good angles and close-ups. Better yet, my ears were treated to some quality queefs during doggystyle vaginal. Something about that grotesque sound in the context of sexual intercourse turns me on every time.

Nikki makes several attempts to deepthroat the thick schlong before her, but she never makes it past the 4-inch mark. Both performers start off well, but they seem to tire out by the end of the scene. The creampie looks real enough to me as it drips out of Nikki's well-fucked pussy. What isn't so convincing is Nikki's acting as she "freaks out". That's okay, sweetie, you'll do better next time.

SCENE 3 - Kylee Reese & Brad Thunders
Approx. 23 min
Boy/Girl

"I don't like being came inside." "I think it's kind of gross." So says Kylee at the beginning of this scene. Naturally, Brad promises to not cum inside her. See where this is going? We proceed to skip over the striptease yet again. Both Kylee and Brad keep up a high level of energy from start to finish. From Kylee's vocal output to the mutual pounding in reverse cowgirl vaginal, there's no shortage of action here.

The ending creampie may be the most realistic one on this DVD. Instead of a loud groan or shudder, Brad just slows down to a pathetic halt. "Uh... had an accident." As he pulls out and the cum starts to drip, it does look pretty convincing. Even better is Kylee's outburst. "Eew, eew, eew, get it out." Kylee smacks Brad and storms off for an emergency douche. I hate to spoil scene endings in my reviews, but the acting here is too good to ignore.

SCENE 4 - Stephanie Cane & Jean Pierre
Approx. 24 min
Boy/Girl

So by now, my need for a decent strip tease is reaching the breaking point. Lucky for me, Stephanie does not get suddenly nude in the blink of an eye. Her clothes slowly come off over the course of this scene, which is always a plus in my opinion. In the interview, Stephanie shares a story about a past shoot where she freaked out after an unexpected creampie. Her personal rule of thumb nowadays? "I don't do creampies at all."

Stephanie's performance here is a mixed bag. She looks great, and she makes all the right vocal noises while getting fucked. But her face just doesn't express a whole lot of pleasure, making for a rather mechanical performance. The camera angles are good, although they don't change often enough. There is a nice close-up of Stephanie getting fucked in cowgirl vag, with her asshole and ass cheeks spread open.

Jean Pierre remains largely silent until the very end of the scene, where he groans loudly during missionary vaginal. There's no close-up of the creampie, but you can see some cum dripping out in the wide shot. May be real, may be fake. Can't really tell.

SCENE 5 - Ashley Roberts & Patrick
Approx. 19 min
Boy/Girl

One last scene, one last interview. Ashley's hang-up with creampies is all about the mess and the chance of pregnancy. This would make perfect sense... if she didn't spend the rest of scene begging for Patrick's cum on her face, mouth, anywhere. "I want you to cum on my fuckin' face." "You wanna cum in my mouth? I wanna fuckin' taste it." For a girl obsessed with cleanliness down below, she sure has a dirty mouth. Ashley does have nice, old-school skills. Her blowjob is slow and pleasant, with no stunts or heroics.

Patrick doesn't display a great deal of stamina here. By the time they're fucking in doggystyle vaginal, he looks winded and starts to slow down significantly. So it should come as no surprise that the creampie is of the thick, white, and totally fake variety. Ashley's reaction is right in line with the others. Whatever happened to all the girls who love a surprise load of semen dumped in their vaginas?

EXTRAS

Very minimal. There are two trailers (Pigtails Round Asses Vol. 9 & MILF Internal 7) that automatically play when you start the disc, then are also available from the main menu. The 3-and-a-half-minute photo slideshow contains a mix of glamour and sex stills. However, only four of the five girls are included - the sweet and charming Nikki Anne is unfortunately omitted.

FINAL RECOMMENDATION

Skip it. There just isn't enough material or quality here to justify even a rental. I've never been in favor of fake creampies, and the scenes on this DVD that include them do nothing to change my mind. No anal whatsoever, and the male performances are uniformly bland. At the end of the day, you're left with some very attractive girls engaged in fairly vanilla sex. Speaking of which, a vanilla milkshake would look more convincing than some of the fake creampies on display in Creampie Surprise Volume 9.

RUNNING TIME: 114 minutes