Big Omar's Sex Toy Party Review

In this light-hearted but extremely low-budget caper from British cocksman-cum-director Omar, our "hero" finds himself a job as a sex toy sales rep, providing plenty of scope for easy laughs and highly predictable encounters with randy housewives.

Simone
Omar picks up an ad for a job as a door-to-door salesman, selling sex toys. Accompanied by his trusty cameraman, Burt, he meets with the boss, Simone, at her house and is soon being tested on his sales technique, which will rely heavily on supplying clients with a little something extra (or more accurately a big something extra). The slim brunette slips off her blouse and bra and Omar licks her tiny tits. Burt lurches in for an up skirt close up, though the picture is too dark, and she bends over to blow Omar. In turn, he takes her from behind, but though her backside is quite inviting, generally I think that Simone isn't particularly attractive - though the weak colour doesn't aid her unhealthy pale complexion. When she's on top it's clear she's just a little on the thin side for my taste, but at least she fucks away with some energy.

Omar picks her up and fucks her, and then puts her on a chair for some deep missionary sex, her legs waving still clad in her clunky-heeled calf-length boots. Simone is panting noticeably during a break for a quick BJ, and then Omar resumes a steady pace. Burt's knob appears in shot, and Omar takes a break while Simone intently sucks Burt till he comes on her face. Omar then spurts a sizeable load over her features too. Simone sucks him sexily after, but I can't say I was overly impressed with her performance. The scene is also spoiled by excessively dull and graniny picture quality.

Becky
Despatched on his first job, Omar calls on Becky. Now, the first thing that strikes me when this decidedly plump, homely-looking blonde opens the door is this: why does Omar, a good-looking, well-spoken guy with a good sense of humour, spend his working life (and I mean this in the real sense, not just the character on screen) knobbing such unattractive women? I am sure he could do a hell of a lot better. Given that he's the producer, director and so on, I wonder why he decides to hire a girl like Becky. Even if we're talking about fitting in with the "randy housewives" style of these low-rent movies, and even with the limited resources of the UK porn scene, surely he could hire some young shapely sexpot.

Once again I find myself skirting around the issue because I have no desire to insult this girl, but the fact remains that Becky looks infinitely better with her clothes on, and that's not saying much! Suffice to say that she is not in good shape at all - please take this as a strong hint to avoid this scene unless you like 'em flabby. The deal is that she's more interested in his cock than the sex toys and so she whips it out, sucks him and they fuck. The sex follows a similar form to the preceding scene, and Burt jumps in for a quick BJ before the pair unload on Becky's face. Omar even bravely lets the hefty lass go on top at one stage. She's not very active but is quite noisy - not very important really when it's so hard to watch. There's not one single angle that flatters her wobbly body - I am sorry, I truly hate to be cruel but this is simply ghastly. Next!

Chantelle
Having had to do a runner (yet again!) when Becky's husband turns up, Omar and Burt find themselves on another scruffy housing estate in the home of nail artist Chantelle - another buxom blonde, though in considerably better shape than Becky. She's got quite a pleasant manner, at least, but again she is definitely not my type, if there is such a thing. As I am pondering what my type is, Chantelle provides evidence of what it isn't. Bleach blonde, lank hair, too much make up, tattoos - not really for me, thanks very much.

Chantelle does look naughty when she's sucking on Omar's cock - again, the lady prefers the real thing to the toys on offer. She treats Omar to a tit fuck before he starts spearing her in mish. There's better chemistry here - she actually reacts to the sex like she's really feeling something - but I just don't find her attractive, and that's the problem. Her boyfriend wanders in and wonders what's going on. Not exactly observant, is he? Chantelle just growls at him to get his cock out, which he does. This is crudely amusing - Omar introduces himself to the bewildered newcomer as they top and tail his missus. Again, they fuck on to no great effect - it's hardly startling stuff. The boyfriend (who seems unable to get it up and does no more than get his dick sucked) warns Omar and Burt not to come on her face. Of course, what do they do? Spurt all over Chantelle's face. Cue another swift exit, enforced by another angry bloke!

Suzie
Omar and the lecherous Burt try their luck in some apartments and find curvy little cutie Suzie (who you may recognize from work for Joey Silvera in LA) home alone. Once more the action follows the pattern of a horny girl preferring the real thing to the sex toys, and poor old Omar has to oblige. While I can imagine Omar finds it easier to rise to the occasion for Suzie, I am less convinced. Hey, I know this is getting boring, but I don't fancy her either.

Suzie is at least younger, cuter and in much better shape than the others, and she seems positively delighted, disbelieving almost, with what she finds in Omar's trousers. She gives him a nice suck - it's quite sexy to see her trying to fit it in her little mouth - and then bounces away in his lap, her short denim skirt round her waist and her soft tits peeking out over her top. They get into mish, but Burt, who growls away like a caveman, blocks his own light, making it hard to see what's going on. Not clever. The sex is again quite underwhelming as Omar fucks Suzie in doggy and then lets her go on top, before she takes Burt's tattooed cock (yes, a tattoo on his cock - that would bring a tear to a glass eye!) in her mouth. Both guys douse her face in come when there's a knock at her door - it's her dad. Cue another comedy getaway.

Overall
Not having seen much of this series, I was again surprised and disappointed that Sex Toy Party sees Omar setting up the scenes quite well with a cheekily humorous approach, but then reverting to extremely standard porno sex during the action. It's a shame that he doesn't carry the good mood on during the fucking. That's not to say, however, that it's mean-spirited. Quite the reverse - there's a complete absence of malice, it's all good dirty fun, but what disappoints me is that the actual sex doesn't maintain any sense of exuberance or excitement. Though the mood each time is initially light hearted and playful, there's no kissing, no chat or anything to suggest that's its anything other than sex for cash.

The cast are also lacking in terms of looks - again, if Omar wants to spend his time screwing very ordinary women, that's fine, and while I appreciate there's an audience for this sort of thing, I am not in their number. If Omar could approach the same cheeky, naughty, easy-going style but with much more attractive and enthusiastic performers, I'd be much more interested. I'm sure he has hired better girls on other occasions but as it stands, Sex Toy Party is a cheap little movie with little to recommend it.

DVD Comments
Generally weak colour, excessively dark interior shots and a grainy picture add up to a cheap looking DVD as far as the picture quality is concerned. It's all a bit dull and frequently hard to see what's going on when the camera is inspecting more intimate areas. In fact, some angles are rendered quite useless. Definitely "lacking". The extras are limited to a photo gallery and what I thought was going to be a selection of trailers, but is in fact a static image. Cheapskates! Very poor.