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How often did Rocco ask his buxom English muse Kelly Stafford "how
did you get to be so nasty?" And how often did I wonder if he really
wanted to know the truth? As this compilation shows, Rocco doesn't
wait for an answer as he gives wild child Kelly free rein to explore
the outrageous side of sex, capturing her being gangbanged, humiliating
old men, sucking off a dwarf dressed as a baby and of course putting
herself through some extreme anal action himself. The idea of a
busty blonde English rose turning out to be an insatiable nympho
prone to the most extravagant sexual behaviour is undeniably alluring,
but can you just sit there and savour the carnage without asking
the difficult questions? These are the gory details, fight fans…
Kelly
& Luna, from Dirty Anal Kelly in Rome
I remember the first time I saw this scene, thinking it to be just
about the most intense, unhinged piece of pornography I'd ever witnessed.
In the intervening years it's lost only a little of its impact.
Real sparks fly in a scene that begins with Kelly and Italian starlet
Sexy Luna flashing their bits from the back of a people carrier
at poor Silvio Evangelista, following behind on a bicycle as he
does a fair impression of Italian cycling legend Marco Pantani,
RIP. The earlier part of the set-up in the Adriatic resort of Riccione
has been shorn from this compilation version. Scholars of Italian
innuendo may well be able to explain why, in the original movie,
Gabriel Zero found the name of the town so amusing.
Anyway, Silvio finally catches up with the gang at a hillside villa
where the sight of Kelly stuffing three fingers into her own ass
and then getting Luna to suck them intimates the kind of action
we're to expect. After Silvio's modest efforts at fucking the girls
kick things off, Rocco enters the fray and sparks do really fly
- it's a full-on, all-spitting, all-slapping, all-filthy affair
crammed with ass-to-mouth oral and all-round rudeness. There's no
little sadism in the way Rocco buggers these girls - the sex is
mainly of the anal variety - but Luna (slim, blonde and tan though
only moderately attractive) in particular proves a fiery partner,
slapping Rocco back, and triggering a predictable response.
It's tough stuff no doubt but compelling viewing nonetheless: I
suppose we could throw words like savage, brutal and aggressive
at it - let's just stick with very, very sexy and be done with it.
Silvio is marginalized by Rocco's typically assertive behaviour
but after the main man has shot his load on the girls' faces, he
follows up with a large load that these mucky pups gladly share.
Look who came at dinner - transsexual orgy from Dirty Anal Kelly
in Rome
In an edited version of the scene setting in, Kelly amusingly explains
her dislike for Martina Mercedes. The main dish is a debauched dinner
party where, as the guests arrive, crudités are passed over in favour
of crudity, with blonde Czech Renata Rey looking rather fetching
slurping Andrea Nobili's tool while a pair of travesti get friendly
with Kelly and Silvio.
Once we really get into the meat of the action, Kelly gets a pretty
decent seeing-to from a slender, tan TS (Eva Ciccione or Claudia
Costa - I'm not sure who) - the pair of them seem quite into each
other - while Silvio and Andrea waste little time in getting fired
into the other TS and Renata, who proves pretty comfortable in playing
with whoever. I'm not a big fan of transsexuals at all, but this
is one of the sexier scenes I've seen on the theme, with the great
location - a rooftop terrace and penthouse level rooms in the seaside
hotel set in evening sun - adding to the mood of debauchery.
Kelly & the Beach Boys, from Dirty Anal Kelly in Rome
Kelly is led off to the dunes behind the beach where she take on
a large group of seemingly amateur guys in an oral gang bang. Kelly
sucks off lots of men and is duly showered in come, with a few choice
comments and sparky little moments thrown in as expected. This sort
of scene, with others to follow, serves to illustrate recurring
themes in Rocco's movies over the course of his directorial career
(e.g. the oral gangbang, the young girl/older guy scene, the rough
sodomy, the exhibitionism and showmanship) as much as making its
own point.
Dirty
old man, from Dirty Anal Kelly in Rome 2
If you'll forgive me, I shall refrain from lingering on this scene,
where Kelly and Rocco visit an old folks' home. Kelly sucks off
this old boy (Rocco calls him Mario - he's among the fuckers in
Never Say Never to Rocco Siffredi and plays the hunchback in Marquis
De Sade) before totally humiliating him by spitting on him, flushing
his head in the toilet and generally roughing him up. To me, while
Mario is apparently a willing partner, there's absolutely zero erotic
value in this scene - your mileage may vary.
Girl in a box, from Dirty Anal Kelly in Rome 2
The ironic thing is that I have absolutely no moral issues with
seeing Kelly and her "friends" (I doubt Christmas cards will be
exchanged) in some gangbang action. Let me work that one out while
I tell you that we next see Mario, all freshly shaved and reinvigorated,
wheeling a Perspex box through the streets of Rome. The catch is
that the box contains this crazy young English sexpot called Kelly
Stafford! Sexy Luna presides over a busload of guys - echoes of
L'Autobus Del Sesso - who load Kelly into the hold of their coach
for the trip to an outdoor location where Kelly, Luna and Martina
entertain this group of pro studs (Roccaforte, Baillat, Zampa, Ribot
and Evangelista) and amateur cocksmen to a massive group scene,
featuring bags of anal, deeply penetrating DP and lots and lots
of come shots.
A golden shower for Kelly from Silvio that's in the Italian edition
has been edited out, but otherwise all the highlights are there:
from a catfight between Kelly and Martina, when the former tries
to insist Martina take some guy's load, via some heavy-duty DP to
lots of come-swapping between the girls, again with some sparks
flying and some serious attitude along the way. You can really tell
Kelly and Martina don't get on and this lends proceedings a certain
edge that discerning viewers will really get off on!
Rocco & Kelly, from Rocco and Kelly's Perversion in Paris
Moving on to the somewhat disappointing Rocco and Kelly's Perversion
in Paris, we find a band playing outside Rocco's hotel room (a great
spot for the final stage of the Tour De France, I should note -
watch coverage closely to spot the hotel just opposite where the
riders emerge from the tunnel to turn left onto Rue de Rivoli) to
accompany some morning sodomy for Kelly. A little oral and vaginal
sex before Rocco works his tool into her open ass, causing Kelly
to emit a squelchy fart. She turns round to suck him off and he
wonders if she can taste it. He asks her what "it" might be. "Shit,"
she whispers, continuing to suck. Oh, so glad we can be honest for
once about this whole ass-to-mouth game.
The funny thing is that for all this smuttiness, this is actually
one of the most intimate and tender moments we're likely to see
between Rocco and Kelly - a very gentle fuck ironically set as a
prelude to one of the most unpleasant sex scenes I've ever seen
in a porn movie.
Dr Fist gets a hiding, from Rocco and Kelly's Perversion in Paris
Rocco and Kelly then go out into Paris and pick up French pornstar
and Robin Williams impersonator Alain L'yle, bringing him back to
the hotel room. Initially riled by Alain's attempt to do his old
Dr Fist routine, Kelly seems utterly pissed off with the wimpish
and faintly creepy Frenchman; he seems intimidated by her aggression.
While I know the whole thing is a set-up, a performance, an act,
it sails uncomfortably close to the wind. There is some sex in among
a lot of rough play, hard slapping and spitting - mostly by Kelly
- but I remain totally unstimulated and utterly bemused as to what
everyone gets out of it. Rocco's juvenile sniggering from behind
the camera is also less than I expect from him, though perhaps in
keeping with his taste for sensation.
Kelly
in the cemetery, from Rocco and Kelly's Perversion in Paris
The next scene is taken from the same movie, and is an odd little
interview sort of affair set in a Parisian cemetery. Rocco tries
to quiz Kelly about her fantasies and so forth but she just seems
to talk in riddles about the devil and the positive aspects of eating
shit. Again Kelly seems enigmatic at best, childish and damn annoying
at worst, and the scene appears to mix fantasy and real life in
a way that both invites and confounds attempts to discern just what
makes this girl tick.
Kelly the slave, from Rocco's Way to Love
It is ironic, of course, that I might take issue with Kelly's aggression
in these preceding scenes, but have no problem with this dungeon-set
scene which shows Rocco in particularly dominant and sadistic mode.
The way he jabs his cock into her ass leaves little room to doubt
his intent - let's put it this way: her pleasure is not his concern
- and he follows this up with harsh back-handed slaps to her face
that cause her to call for a pause to check her nose is okay. The
thing is, while I may question her motivation, she seems to really
want this and that makes this a little easier to take. It is also
very raw and physically persuasive in a very basic sexual sense
and that's what I get off on. The scene is taken from Rocco's Way
to Love, one of Rocco's best features.
Kelly & Holly, from When Rocco Meats Kelly 2
Finally, rounding off the compilation is another scene based around
more circus sideshow sensationalism. Kelly arrives at Rocco's hotel
in Barcelona where Rocco tells her he's looking after someone's
baby. It turns out the baby is none other than Spanish dwarf Holly
One, resplendent in a big nappy. Being generous, this is amusing
for a good ten seconds, but after that…
Kelly plays "mummy" and punishes him a little before giving him
access to her big boobs and ass. She sucks him, giggling about his
little mushroom and they have some very brief sex, a couple of times.
I believe the Italian edition may show Kelly peeing on Holly, but
frankly, I can live with out it. For novelty value, great, but otherwise
it's really nothing to write home about and frankly not worthy of
a place in a "best of" - WRMK2 does contain some ballsy, full on
action that would have made a better finale to this comp.
Conclusion
Best of Kelly must have been a hard act to compile, as Rocco has
shot so many explosive scenes with Kelly. Nonetheless, while they
may accurately reflect Rocco's sometime taste for gimmicky showmanship
and his almost shameless capitalisation on Kelly's outrageousness,
I do have to quibble with the inclusion of several of the scenes
as much of the latter hour of this compilation is really only of
appeal to those who like to see some pretty unappealing guys being
humiliated in one way or another.
Perhaps they have been used in other compilations - as I have all
the originals I steer clear of comps - so apologies if that's the
case, but I would have thought the early encounters between Rocco
and Kelly in When Rocco Meats Kelly and True Anal Stories, the heavyweight
scene from the first Animal Trainer would all have merited inclusion.
That said, the first few scenes here and that dark dungeon encounter,
when Kelly's really into some serious sex action, do show her at
her uninhibited best, proving why so many viewers find her so compelling.
It seems to me that the troubling, darker side makes her much more
intriguing than if she were just another busty blonde doing anal
porn. I can't really and truly disapprove of Rocco for just going
with it as I've followed every one of her escapades and uncritically
absorbed the madness. Looking back now, it's hard to watch without
asking just what the hell was going on. Whatever Kelly is doing
now, this compilation shows her massive impact on Rocco's work,
and while she's certainly not for everyone, I feel it's worth making
her acquaintance. Provocative? That isn't the half of it!
DVD
Comments
Picture quality is decent enough and perhaps is an improvement on
the original editions of the movies. It's all perfectly watchable
if not the pinnacle of audiovisual perfection. The disc boasts the
usual Evil Angel fetish menu, with some interesting entries (!),
photo gallery, a biography of Rocco - though not of Kelly, oddly
- and cast list. A few more extras wouldn't have gone amiss, but
it's a respectable package.
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