Ass Feast Review

Reviewed by skronker  on  10/2/2004

FAST! CHEAP! AND OUT OF CONTROL!
Sinema reviews by Skronker

Solid meat-and-potatoes gonzo fare here from Jake Malone, doing a little moonlighting from his regular gig at Red Light District. Colossal is a new enterprise, which is a tad obvious: The intro/company logo sequence is a rather cheesy animation that looks like a bad video game, for instance; and beyond a (mostly) fun and revealing interview with the delightful Missy Monroe, this is not one of those jam-packed DVD packages like the ones Evil Angel specializes in. Which is fine: You can tell from the basic presentation that this is all about fucking. Jake's got a great cast, with wildchild Heather Cables, the boobalicious Missy, omnislut Ariana Jollee, Tyla Wynn and Nikki Knox. The focus is on 1-on-1 scenes (even if Jake often gets a little "start-up" action, before passing the dutch to his hired stud). Despite loving Ariana, Tyla and Heather in other efforts, and totally digging them here, my favorite scene is Missy’s. Jake sets up a tease scenario in which he portrays the off-camera boyfriend who wants to give his babyfaced fuckdoll a little something special for their “anniversary.” Missy winds up blindfolded and submissive on the couch as Mark Ashley – her gift – arrives. I don’t know about you, but for me the mere sight of this full, round, buxom, blonde bundle of bounce opening her mouth and drooling like a dog over porn stud bone is the surest, fastest, most economical accu-jac trigger currently allowed by law. Missy lustily consumes Ashley’s meat-snack, swapping little comments with Jake, before getting spun through her paces (vaginal, anal, cumshot, smile). What makes the scene sing is simply Missy, who has so much personality and babyslut appeal – Good God, those tits! That slightly lopsided little grin, the one that’s half “sweet young thing” and half “depraved group home refugee”! That perfect round rump! More so than most, the divine Miss M commands your cock’s attention, because she makes your cock want to be right up in there, in her, on screen, on the scene, just that flirty dirty dreampuff and you. Jake’s camera soaks it up. As such, I’d recommend “Ass Feast” for Missy Monroe fans who want to add a playful, smokin’ one-on-one scene to their fantasy catalog; also, check out a girl who, I think, has already bumped in and out of the biz: Nikki Knox, a skanky sort of porn urchin with a delectable roll of babyfat and an air of something tawdry to her game. She sashays in wearing hooker garb, blesses Jake with a hummer and some immediate cowgirl anal, starts humming again as Mike Stefano comes up from the rear, as the scene shifts into another one of the male performer of the year’s exercises in torque-ing-the-tart. This sequence saw as much replay action as Missy’s blindfold BJ. No Academy Awards here, but this “Feast” satisfies like a good pepperoni pizza dripping with gooey mozzarella. If only there was a glass of Missy’s squirt to wash it down with … but a cold beer will suffice.