Anal Manor Review

While I have had some mix of reaction to Private films, for the most part they have been positive. I like the title, and Frank Thring is the director. Generally, this is a very good sign!

Synopsis

While the production date is listed as 2002, this is a significantly older movie. I do not know how old, but it reeks of nostalgia, maybe early 90's. I am not a big nostalgia buff, so some of this is lost on me.

Technical

The photography and sound are not bad considering the vintage of this flic.

Scene 1 - Melanie Rowan

Melanie is a good looking brunette in a fishnet body stocking. She is tied down to a table. A bunch of weird hooded monk dudes start to fondle her. (These monk dudes will be hanging around for the rest of the film, so get used to them.) She blows one while another eats her out. Another note here, she is plenty bushy down below - get used to that too. Not much that's trimmed in this movie. They bone her vaginally and anally while she blows them. The set is like something from a B-Grade horror movie. The lighting is way too dark. This scene is lost on me. Whack Factor: 4

Scene 2 - Aysha Hart

Now we have another shot in a dark setting in the castle. Aysha, an average looking asian girl is supposed to be one of the castle maids. One of the monk dudes does her. No real heat here, just average fucking. Both anal & vag. Again, a wasted scene. Whack Factor: 4

Scene 3 - Danyel Cheeks & Donna Starr

Danyel is the blonde on the cover. She is decent looking. Donna is the hottest chick in the flic. She is a very good looking brunette. She wears a bra, panties and garters - very nice. Danyel takes advantage of her in this scene. There's some good muff munching and heated grinding here. I hate the way the editing keeps taking us back and forth with the previous Aysha scene though. That sucks! Whack Factor: 5

Scene 4 - Melanie Rowan & Marianne la Monte

Melanie plays a dominatrix type in black PVC. Marianne plays another of the castle maids, and she is a little better looking than Aysha. Melanie messes with Marianne for a bit and then a guy shows up. Melanie make Marianne go down on him, and then shares in the duties herself. This is your typical, cold, euro scene. Even though all of the elements are present, there is no heat to this scene. Whack Factor: 3

Scene 5 - Danyel Cheeks & Donna Starr

Frank Thring (who plays a Phantom Of The Opera type dude) and the monks go after these two hotties. The sex with Danyel consists of monk dudes with hoods doing her anally and orally. There is no heat here at all. At least Donna seems into it. But she is left with very little time to do her thing in this scene. Whack Factor: 4

Scene 6 - Danyel Cheeks, Marianne la Monte & Melanie

Danyel sits and witnesses Thring use a possessed dildo on the ass of Marianne. It is incredibly boring. Danyel diddles herself. It is incredibly boring. Then, for no apparent reason, Thring and Marianne leave, and Melanie and that guy show up again. She sucks and fucks him and then he fucks Danyel. This is a wasted, pointless filler scene. Whack Factor: 2

Scene 7 - Aysha Hart, Danyel Cheeks, Marianne la Monte, Donna Starr & Melanie Rowan

Now it's time for dinner with the Phantom, Maids, Monks, and Girls. It turns into an orgy. If I wasn't trying to review this film, this would be laughable. It really is that bad. Whack Factor: 1

Conclusion

Private has done some amazing films. Most of the Black Label line & Penthouse line are wonderful! This, on the other hand, is not. Keep your hard earned money and skip this one.