Reviewed by The WAM BAM! Clan  on  7/8/2006

THE WAM BAM! CLAN roll call:

Ultrasiet2 – he hosts the viewings, and buys every single disc that gets reviewed because of rental restrictions where he lives in Australia. Ultra likes solid anal, Christoph and Rocco’s group scenes, chemistry, original and costumes, pretty Euro girls and sassy American girls like Jenna Presley. And if anyone wants to send him free screeners, fire away.

DeonSlamm – West-Indian by birth, Deon loves hard, sweaty sex. Like Ultrasiet, he loves anal and gaping, but he’s very much into the pacing of a scene, because if a man can’t time it all right, it ain’t gonna be a good night, and he loves a sensuous pussyfuck. His favourite grindsmen are Slayer and Steele, and his all time favourite girl is Nikky Anderson.

The Cunniseur – The academic of the party, the cunniseur found the joys of watching porn with others better than university meetings. He likes porn with originality and flair, and takes technical and directorial aspects quite seriously. He’s something of a porn historian. He also aspires, like all the Wam Bam Clan, to get a quotable quote on the cover of a porn film one day.

Jemima – Jem likes her porn with plenty of variety, and as a bisexual lady, likes her women as much as her men, and focuses on costume, make-up and dancing. She wishes Ultrasiet2 would get a little more girl-girl porn and arty porn. Loved for her sardonic asides and open mind, if you can impress Jem with your film, you’ve done something worthwhile.

ANAL ASSPIRATIONS 2

Directed by Raul Christian for Diabolic

Running time: 2 hours, 58 minutes.

THE SCORE:

B– // A director with a lousy sense of “fun” and sudden camera manoeuvres does his best to sabotage some adequate-to-good anal performances from some fresh Euro talent. Leda Paris’s submissive steamrolling is simultaneously a highlight and lowlight of this gonzo.

Abstract (the quotable stuff, in other words):

Raul Christian is for all intents and purposes a Jean Yves Le Castel clone. He could never be accused of having a distinct style, and the charges of originality would never make it to court. His emphasis like Le Castel’s is on gaping, that mysterious anal art, and he does this reasonably well, but he has problems. First of all, and you see it throughout the movie, he has sudden moves in and out of the action. One minute he’s filming some excellent anal from the floor, the next minute he shifts up to catch the talent’s expressions. There’s no real instinct to this, he’s not an intuitive directorial talent. That aside, his second problem is tone. He has a disrespectful, juvenile tone which is annoying at best, and switch-it-off grating at worst. His decision to involve himself in his scenes in meaningless ways hinders his work immensely. He also appears to, in the eyes of many on this panel, push things a little too far with the spitting and slapping, perhaps to the detriment of his talent's comfort and dignity. He also fails to get any decent set-ups out of his scenes, and chooses male talent that do about as much to draw the best performances out of his female stars as soap-on-a-rope. He is the very definition of an average porn director, and this is an indicative work.

Of the six scenes, Scene Six was best received, with Maria Bellucci outshining covergirl Elinor, who makes two appearances. Scene Four caused the most polarised response, with Jemima scoring it a zero for reasons of puerile unerotic treatment of the female star. It is perhaps a little in poor taste, but it should appeal to fans of rough sex. The rest failed to stir strong feelings.

For those that all this appeals to, this is another buy at the right price, but all up, it’s quite average pornography by a director whose weaknesses far outweigh his strengths.

ALL THINGS TECHNICAL

Audio/visual: About as good as modern gonzo gets. Not as good as Christoph, but better than early Rocco. Colours are fine, skin colour is what we’d consider as normal. Lighting is never really an issue, and shadows are hardly noticeable. There are some contrasting issues, but really only noticeable when Leda gets thrown in the pool.

DVD Extras: Lousy. A picture gallery. Obligatory website shite. Audio-on/Audio-off option. Go with off. Trust me, the music bites. Oh, and a cumshot recap option, but once you've seen the cumshots, will you really want to see them again?

Editing: There are some very odd sharp edits. On the whole it’s no worse than a lot of Diabolic films, but it’s far from ideal.

Technical gaffes: Camerawork is generally good, never great. Angles are fine, but the rapidity of shifts from one shot to the next can cause motion sickness. I think we all expected better from Diabolic, although it’s still bearable.

Fast forward button: It does get a bit repetitive, so you may need it, especially for Scene 1, and depending on your tastes, Scene 4.

ALL THINGS FETISHY

Gapes: Average, with an occasional good gape, but nothing to launch a dollar coin into. Leda's scene had the best, scene two had the most decent gapes.

Costumes: Hardly an emphasis, but average to good, particularly so for Elinor and Maria Belluci.

Make-up: Maria Belluci’s is lovely, but I think Leda Paris’s doesn’t suit her at all. The two girls in Scenes 3 and 4 were a little over the top with the cosmetics. Eye shadow was applied like paint.

INTANGIBLES:

Chemistry: Average. Nobody’s getting married as a result of pairings in this film.

Atmosphere: Gonzo porn at its most workaday.

Setting: Some guy’s house. Maybe the director’s? Nice marble staircase though. The garden seemed okay.

Pleasant surprises: None, really. This was meat and potatoes anal fucking.

SCENE-BY-SCENE ANALYSIS AND DISCUSSION:

SCENE ONE (26 mins approx):

ELINOR (the covergirl and reason this disc caught my eye), two blokes

Elinor, a 22 year old from Budapest, Hungary, does a little bit of a tease, looking fabulous in a frilly bright pink lingerie bikini combo. She teases us for a bit after some interaction with director Raul Christian, then masturbates lightly, before two cocks arrive on either side for some oral and mouth fucking, never anything amazing. Some floor shots past her juicy breasts provide for some decent visuals. She feints at an effortless deep throat, but nothing to write home about.

- She gets on her hands and knees and it’s anal spitroast time. The guys alternate. Her bright pink top sits bunched at her midriff.

- Lots of doggie anal close-ups, but the gapes are average

- RCA with spitroast

- Mish anal with spitroast, then a DP in same position, some ass to mouth

- RC DP with A2M

- RC DP and she leans back and smiles for the camera

- Cumshots are weak, but in the mouth. She swallows with aplomb. Lovely smile to end the scene

Well, how was that for a start.

Average. She’s very pretty, but not a great performer.

I thought she was pretty hot to look at, she’s got sweet tits, a nice ass, but yeah, like Jem, I’m not feeling the evil heat!

I wonder how many scenes this young lady has performed in. She has a natural air about her. I quite liked this scene actually. Functional, but not perfunctory.

Blowjobs and gapes weren’t great though. She needs to blow better and gape better, full stop.

I got a little bored, to tell you the truth. She is very pretty, she has a lovely nose and an excellent, confident smile, but it all looks a little too easy.

I think you complain when the girl’s have a problem with these anal antics you boys love, and when they do it easily, you complain that they find it too easy.

I’m not really refuting that. Look, it was good, she does have a natural air, and she fucked and got fucked very nicely.

Oh I didn’t see her doing any fucking. She just got fucked.

Scores (out of 5 stars)

Ultrasiet2: 3

Deon: 3

Cunniseur: 4

Jem: 1

SCENE TWO (26 mins approx):

SABRINA ROSE AND MONIQUE, two blokes

These two are dirty blondes, a little rough looking for my tastes but sexy. They crawl from behind the couch and jump on the couch to show us some ass. They strip slowly and there’s some unconvincing lesbian play. When Sabrina’s breasts are released, it gets better, and there is ass licking.

- Big blue dildo and little clear dildo warm up their asses

- Two cocks show and it’s a gentle face fuck for each girl. Fans of big breasts will love floor shots of Sabrina’s tits.

- Quickfire anal for Monique in doggy. Doggy anal for Sabrina. Nice shot of them both getting analised on the same couch. A2M for both.

- Small but very pink gapes from Monique

- Monique stays in doggie, while Sabrina gets piledriver anal. A2M for both. Decent gape for Sabrina. She does have the better ass.

- Nice wide gape from Sabrina, but Christian gets his finger where it ain’t needed

- RCA for Monique is nice. Other guy comes over to fuck the ass as she’d he;d in the air, and Sabrina does A20GM.

- Mish anal for Monique, doggie for Sabrina. Shots of Monique’s ass are great.

- Sabrina looks a little uncomfortable with mish anal, but her gape is worthwhile.

- Stpidly Christian’s shoe steps on Monique’s butt during her miss anal

- Killer shot of both girls getting side-by-side doggie anal. Gapes aplenty.

- Then, Sabrina gets a weak facial, and then another weak facial. Snowballing.

These two girls got righteously sodomised, but far more the insanity it could have been. No DP’s, very little spit-roasting. Nowhere near the interaction between them as I’d hoped.

Actually it was a little dull. Where was the chemistry? I saw Sabrina looking everywhere but at her partner when being fucked. Monique was a little more into it, but I bet she can get really excited when she’s, well, really excited. Which she wasn’t here.

Yeah, we were robbed. No DP? Not even a dual blow-job? No tit worship for Sabrina? This was a half-assed scene, but that one cheek we got was great. Man, they should have just kept analising those two in doggy.

I wonder why they didn’t go the DP route or have more interaction.

Girls probably weren’t into each other.

Directorial intervention was a pain. He should’ve been thinking about how to make the scene more interesting. Instead, he put his foot in it.

Literally. Good call, Cunniseur.

Scores (out of 5 stars)

Ultrasiet2: 3

Deon: 2.5

Cunniseur: 3

Jem: 1.5

SCENE THREE: (30 mins approx)

ELECTRA, some guy

Another Hungarian in Electra, 22 years, laying on a sunbed in black stockings, shoes and a black-and-red bra/panties combo. I think her nose is a little too heavy for my liking. She does some tease for us. Oh, sorry, what is it Jem?

Her eye shadow looks like it was put on by a man. Way too heavy.

Thanks for that contribution. Now we get a look at her ass. If you’re playing the music with the scene on the disc, you may notice it’s not as rubbish as usual. She gets a bead-effect glass dildo in her mouth, then there’s minutes of anal play wth it, including some love shots of her bent over, ass in air, dildo blocking that hole and her legs looking excellent.

- Blowjob time, and the dildo stays in the ass. Her blowjob technique is a bit ‘smack the face on the billspike’ but it has some life in it compared to what we’ve seen so far.

- Lying on her back, she takes a standing mouthfuck. Great visual!

- Note the prominence of her splendid clavicle!

- RCA with some clit stimulation from the guy, then she brings her legs forward for the ‘sodomy M’, as I’m calling it. She jumps off for some A2M. Keeping her black stockings on makes her super hot!

- Raul continues to natter out instructions. Fingers go in mouth.

- Gape time. Pretty ordinary.

- As she does an A2M, irritatingly an extra hand pointlessly grips her head, presumably to push her down on the cock.

- Spoon anal. She seems into it.A2M.

- Doggie anal on the sunchair with A2M

- Flat on back mish anal approaching piledriver anal with A2M facefuck. Average gaping.

- Cumshot. Bit weak. She swallows. Coquettish look for the camera.

Well, so far I’m a little nonplussed. Three scenes and no real winners for me.

I’m finding Mr Christian really rather tiresome. Never mind directorial interference – it must have some point of difference. For all the venom directed at Monsieur Le Castel for his anal films, he at least achieved a sort of self-caricature, with his ‘oop-la’ business. If you liked it, you liked it for its idiosyncrasy. This man doesn’t have any charisma. He doesn’t know how to do a decent set-up. Never mind that, can he at least get out of the way of his own work. The answer sadly is no.

She was horribly made up, and I found that distracting. I was hoping for chemistry with a one-on-one but I didn’t believe it at all. In fact, I’m not sure she really enjoyed herself at any stage.

Oh, I think she did.

You frequently think that Deon, even when it’s clear to anyone else the girl’s faking it.

You have insider knowledge. Anyway, I liked it. I think you’re right though Ultra, this ain’t one of the better ones.

Scores (out of 5 stars)

Ultrasiet2: 2.5

Deon: 3.5

Cunniseur: 2.5

Jem: 1

SCENE FOUR (34 mins approx)

LEDA PARIS and three guys you want to avoid like the plague.

Now I’m quite excited about this scene because it’s got a very, very pretty girl in it who I really respond to.

Yeah, I know you like her a lot, but I don’t really get why.

You don’t think she’s gorgeous Deon?

No, she’s all right, but I don’t see the fuss. I mean with her eyes and cheekbones, she reminds me a bit of Marilyn Manson.

Oh bloody hell. You could’ve damned with faint praise instead. Marilyn Manson?

I do see where our young friend is coming from.

I don’t.

Yeah, there’s something slightly, I don’t know, weird about her.

I think a trip to the optometrist is in order, frankly Deon, but here’s the scene breakdown:

Leda starts off in a dress, a nice gingham design. I dig her accent and her smile. I’m going to pre-empt Jem’s problem with her eyeshadow.

Her eyebrows are worse.

Fine. She shows us her ass, and I like the look of that hole of hers. How about the lipstick.

A little obvious, but competently applied. No, actually, it looks good.

Christian pulls Leda by the hair and spits into it. Why, I’m not sure. He holds her by the throat on the ground by the pool, and lightly slaps her face. She’s so sexy as she’s submissive on the ground. He folds her panties into her vagina, and comments ‘she likes pain.’ More spitting and slapping.

- He fingerfucks her. She gets off on it.

- Bent over, she takes a big blue transparent dildo. Her wonderful green eyes leer at the camera.

- Slapping, spitting, fingerfucking while the dildo stays in. Erotic breathing.

- FINALLY! A DECENT GAPE! A GOOD GAPE!

- Dildo DP with clear pussy dildo

- Vag slapping, which seems fun

- Face fuck with two cocks. Note the hot black tongue-stud.

- Throatfuck, and she’s liking it. Damn this is hot!

- Big gloop of spit falls from her mouth, she looks like she might need a break

- Silly giggling from the male stars.

- RCA, with two cocks on either side for her to suck.

- Guys changes positions, with some vag stimulation, which she responds to

- then it’s onto doggy spitroast on the couch, with a cameo nice gape. She;’s getting nicely roasted!

- First signs of what could be construed as painful anal – doggie sodomy, and she gapes good. Guys go balls deep. A2M. Spitting and slapping as she gets fucked. Christian chips in with lots of unnecessary ‘bitch’ comments.

- As she is face-fucked, she looks in pain with the anal. One of the males imitates her moaning and breathing.

- Now’s where slapping and mish anal starts to look like it’s taking a toll on her.

- Piledriver anal looks great, but sounds tear-inducing. Camera moves a little nauseatingly.

- Lovely gape though. Gape of the movie, says Deon.

- Mish DP now. Maybe a little in pain? A lovely moan or two. I find it sexy. She goes airtight.

- RC DP, going airtight. A2M.

- A set of weak cumshots into her mouth, and she swallows nicely. Christian asks her if she enjoyed herself. An eventual yes. Then throws her into the pool. She looks offended/disoriented, but smiles eventually. Love her smile. She breaks a nail.

Well, well. Jem, you want to lead it off.

I almost switched that off. If that girl was enjoying herself, then I’m a crème brulee. She was in pain at various points during the anal, and really didn’t seem to be having fun. Never mind that, but what really offended me was the face slapping, when the director could see she wasn’t roaring with glee, and worst of all, aping her moans and laughing at her. This is the sort of idiotic porn we don’t need, and because it’s gonzo, nobody can turn around and say they weren’t complete pricks to her.

I don’t know about you, but that was red hot for me. And remember, the director says she likes pain, and she was getting off on things at the start! Well, not the swimming pool bit at the end, but everything else.

He said it, not her, and her English seemed decent. More importantly, I didn’t see her enjoyment.

I’m with Jemima, this was quite painful to watch at times. I mean, there was an anti-chemistry between the performers. And I’m quite fatigued with these fellows, they really are very ordinary male talent. Make all of us men look bad.

Well, I don’t know that male porn talent are ever really going to be spokespeople for masculinity in general. Look, I’m biased towards the girl, and I must admit I did get a very altruistic concern, somewhat paternal concern for her, which is an odd feeling when you’re watching a woman get sodomised, but she clearly wasn’t 100% into things. That said, and I’m grateful Deon’s here to agree, her submissiveness is just wonderful. This girl takes a pounding, in many different positions, and still doesn’t look traumatised at the end. It’s tremendously sexy how she gets roughed up and steamrolled.

Oh come on Ultra, I expected better from you. I agree when I see a submissive being lorded over by someone who knows what they are doing, a Brandon Iron type. This was puerile bullying by idiots.

On a separate note, the camera movements were a little over the top here, very distracting.

Let’s put the focus on Leda Paris. I think she’s got a real sultry beauty, she’s only 18. I just want one of you to agree that she’s bloody hot and a real firecracker.

I still think she looks a bit like Marilyn Manson, but she moans in the right way. And I’m going to defend the slaps, because she took a beating and a pounding and handled it!

Poor girl had to swallow their semen at the end of it. Far too much forbearance. We need a new suffragette movement after that scene, I think.

Scores (out of 5 stars)

Ultrasiet2: 4

Deon: 4.5

Cunniseur: 1.5

Jem: 0

SCENE FIVE (27 mins approx):

LILIT, two guys

Lilit is an attractive Ukranian brunette who, bent over, reveals lovely long, skinny legs and a sweet, but not capacious, butt. She tells us she’s from the Ukraine, and soon she’s bent over on the couch, receiving the glass dildo anal treatment. Her partner and the director both decide she takes it too easily, and soon she’s half lying face down on the couch, propping herself on her hands as two cocks come from either side.

- The blow jobs are the shallow mouth-fuck variety, and she graduates to being entirely on the couch receiving spit-roast treatment, with anal straight off the bat.

- The guys alternate on her, and there’s a bit of gaping and A2M.

- Next we have RCA, again with A2M thrown in, and she moves from guy to guy.

- RCA spit-roasting takes place, with breaks in the action for the guy getting blown to attack the ass.

- Gaping continues as she get spitroasted in sideways missionary.

- Some pussy to ass to pussy occurs, before a reverse missionary DP ended with some cocksucking;

- A missionary DP with P2M results.

- The loads come fast and weak and a last look at her asshole sees some inflammation, suggesting a hard day’s work.

Guys, I thought the spirit of this scene was much better than the last.

Yeah I liked it a lot, she’s a lanky girl, but attractive. She could’ve gaped wider, but it’s still cool. She did good work.

I think she was a bit phony. There’s a bit where she’s come out of RCA and she’s about to blow a cock, and even with nothing actually fucking her she’s still breathing and gasping ecstatically.

You’d prefer she stop immediately?

It didn’t come off as a very genuine performance. I agree it was better than the last one, but that’s not saying much. She may actually have orgasmed for real if they’d decided to allow some vaginal sex. There’s a brief moment when one of the guys starts moves to vaginal sex and the director asks him what he’s doing. The guy laughs and says nobody cares about vaginal sex, but he likes it, and keeps going with the anal.

I think with the title of the film being what it is, that’s not the greatest crime.

No, but ultra, having a joke amongst performers and not including the audience is. There’s a reference to one of the studs as being ‘spider’ and they’re all having a giggle about it. What’s it mean? No explanation anywhere. Either they explain it, or they should shut up.

Yeah, that sort of stuff is very distracting.

I have to say when she looks into the camera, her eyes are very animated and she’s quite engaging. Also, that magic M effect when you see her legs folded to her sides in RCA – she looks excellent. Probably the visual of the film so far for me.

Only one more scene.

Well, we know where you stand on this movie. Scores now:

Scores (out of 5 stars)

Ultrasiet2: 4

Deon: 4

Cunniseur: 3.5

Jem: 2

SCENE SIX (32 mins approx):

MARIA BELLUCCI, ELINOR (covergirl), Frank Gunn, Alberto Rey, some other bloke

The scene starts with the two girls bent over showing off their gluteals, and I speak for myself when I say they are two very impressive asses. Both are stacked in the breasts also. Both have hot G-string lingerie on and little skirts – the skirts come off quickly, and there’s so titty licking.

- Elinor takes off Maria’s G and licks her asshole. Maria returns the favour.

- Maria does some anal warm-up with a glass dildo, and Elinor with a horse-tail dildo when cocks show up

- Maria’s singular BJ is a passionate affair with ball sucking. Elinor takes on two cocks in shallow, bored fashion. Both have some eye contact.

- Abrupt cut to Maria RCA, no mucking around. Great shot of her breasts bouncing from below. Again, she steals the scene from Elinor being spitroasted in RCA. Both girls have stockings on. A2M for Maria.

- Pure RCA for Elinor. Mish anal for Maria. Great eye contact. Elinor does A2M. Then A20GM, but Maria decides to steal the dick away and taste her own ass again.

- Doggie anal for Elinor, a great look as she licks her hanging breast. Next guy steps to the hole. Meanwhile, mish anal spitroast for Maria. Elinor gapes as Maria lies on her back and gets assfucked. Elinor’s hole gets creamy.

- Great visual of maria getting mouth fucked on her back as she gets assfucked

- Elinor bounces on cock in RCA. A lube-fart makes everyone jump, but it’s a false alarm.

- RC DP for Elinor as Maria’s flat-on-back anal continues. P2M.

- Mish DP for Maria as Elinor sucks dick

- Back to DP for Elinor, then Maria takes it again

- Pussy fuck for Elinor in mish, then DP AGAIN!

- Maria blows Alberto Rey as Elinor gets A2M from Frank, then Maria comes in for some A2OGM on Elinor’s DP. Finally, A GAPE! Maria P2OGM.

- After all that insanity, the girls kneel for a Christian comment on their beauty before three loads. The first misses their faces on first go, but has some strength. The next is a water-cooler-drip. The third delivers a yoghurt splash mainly on Maria’s face. There’s a touch of snowballing. They look a million dollars as they smile for the camera. Both girls show their asses for the camera one last time, then they crawl off down the marble stairs on their hands and knees, with Christian telling them to fuck off and even kicking their ass on the way down.

Well Jemima, I know what you’re going to say, but before that, Cunniseur, did a scene ever more loudly scream for post-cum head?

Yes, but I’m afraid our friend just lacks that levels of prescience with his filming. Look, these girls were splendid, I really liked this scene, he shut up for the most part, the girls knew their craft, they seemed to enjoy themselves, and they looked wonderful and were so very filthy.

I just wonder about the lack of good gaping. I mean, two hot, hot girls, and not enough gaping.

Fair point. I really liked Maria Belluci, I thought she was enthusiastic, her choker made her look very sexy, and her eye contact was perfect.

There’s a moment when Elinor is getting double-teamed, and she says ‘Oww’ in the most alluring, feline way.

She should have said ‘miaow.’ Actually, maybe she did.

She didn’t, I assure you.

I love her mole as well. She reminds me a little of that Christ girl.

I’m going to assume you mean Anastasia Christ and not anyone Biblical.

That’s the one.

I think Anastasia’s a tough act to emulate, but Elinor’s breasts are wonderful, so are Maria’s. I enjoyed the scene, they are excellent eye candy, but now, hit me with it Jem.

I actually kind of enjoyed it too.

Shock horror!

Oh don’t worry, I still think the director’s an idiot, God knows who found that ending sequence funny or endearing, and he just can’t shut up. However, I think Maria Bellucci is gorgeous. I’d kill to spend a night with a girl like her. Elinor was phony, but we knew that from the first scene. Camera spent way too much time on her. Still, probably the best scene on the disc. Which says something. And nothing.

Well, I think if you get a moderate response from Jem, you’ve not done badly.

Scores (out of 5 stars)

Ultrasiet2: 4

Deon: 3.5

Cunniseur: 4

Jem: 3

And that’s a wrap. Parting thoughts?

Raul Christian should suck on Chupa-chups, because if he does that, he won’t talk.

And there is medication to slow him down with his jerky camera movements.

If Leda Paris really needs any counselling, more than happy to volunteer my services.

ANAL ASSPIRATIONS #2 is available at most retailers. See if you can bag it for under $10.