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All Barely Legal Damaged Productions Movie Reviews

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Boxcover for Fuck'em Young (Damaged)
Fuck'em Young (Damaged) 

Release date: 10/8/2005
Reviewed on: 1/4/2006 by tongue-in-groove

Starring: Brooke, Lyla Lei, Sydnee Capri, Brandi May, Romina, Angelina Rio
Studio: Damaged Productions

Directed by: Antonion Del Toro
Review brief: Fuck Em Young is a great idea. Too bad none of the girls is this Damaged production could be remotely considered young. Id guesstimate the youngest girl in the group is 23-24 years old. Not exactly what the title implies. The sex aint bad. Director Antonio del Toro does a pretty good job matching partners with similar chemistry. And he keeps the action fairly hot throughout. But the girls are strictly B-Listers, at best. Asian brunette Lyla Lei hasnt been eating too many salads recently, if you get my drift. But shes a screamer, yelling nasty expletives at her ebony partner throughout the opener. He takes him up the ass, does some A2M, and opens wide for a mouthful at the end. Brooke is a veteran with a horrible fairy tattoo on her tummy. She seems less than enthused, as evidenced by her Behind the Scenes bonus feature demeanor. Shed rather be at an IRS audit.
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Boxcover for Teen Factor
Teen Factor 

Release date: 7/30/2005
Reviewed on: 12/8/2005 by tongue-in-groove

Starring: Anastasia, Claudia Claire, Bibian Norani, Lisa Lee, Salma de Nora, Dragana Presley
Studio: Damaged Productions

Review brief: Teen Factor is another throw-away from Damaged Productions in Europe. Why do they even bother packaging this trash? Maybe it sells over there, but I doubt it will ever catch on in the U.S., where viewers tend to be very selective and expect a good product for their dollars. Where to startokay, only one of the six girls is even remotely close to being a teenager. The star (and I use that term loosely) is Bibian Norai, a blonde who might be old enough to have teens of her own. I cant tell you which girl is the youngest because, like most of Damageds products, there is no (zero, nada) attempt at identifying the performers. No director is credited, although I cant blame the person responsible for this mess for seeking anonymity. As usual with cheap Euro junk (as opposed to the classy films of companies like Private), the voice-overs are in pretty good English, but the dubbing of the performers voices reminds one of a typical conversation at Ellis Island. To their credit, the girls (whoever they are) avoid perpetually staring at the camera, another Euro tradition I hate.
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Review brief: European Teen Dream may be what the French, Germans, and Slavs enjoy in porn, but it doesnt fly well on this side of the Pond. If this was all porn has to offer, the industry would die a fast death. Combine average (by Euro standards) girls performing barely warm sex with a poorly-dubbed voice-over soundtrack and you get this abomination. Throw in poor camerawork (often out of focus or too close to the performers) and you can just about discount it completely. The scenes take place (in order): in a field next to a grave (on a cement wall that looks terribly uncomfortable); on a couch (with two girls doing their soccer-watching boyfriends); on a porch (with a hubby/wife team seducing their maid); in an art gallery; and on the outdoor set of a TV or radio talk show (where one girls does two guys). No performer ids are offered, so a cast/scene breakdown is impossible. The box cover lists Silvia Lancome, Lucy Lee, Anastasia, Dragana Presley, Claudia Claire, and Salma de Nora as the actresses, but I couldnt tell you who is who.
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Review brief: Silver Label (aka Sensual Blend) has a plethora of technical problems, all of which could be overlooked if the girls were decent looking and the sex was hot. Unfortunately, neither of these factors is addressed by Damaged Productions or director Antonio del Toro. Problems? Where to start? Okay, how about the amateurish camerawork. The cameraman needed a couple more cups of coffee that morning, as his shaky hand is evident in just about every position change. When he wasnt shaking, rattling or rolling the camera, he was trying to get fancy by turning his camera sideways MTV style, often resulting in out of focus shots. Who started this obnoxious trend in porn? In addition, the camera cuts away from the money shot to show the guys face. We know what grimacing and straining looks likejust leave the camera on the girls face! Then they cut away from the girls face after the frosting way too quick. So much for the technical issues. The girls are average looking, at best. Alysin Chaynes used to be a very hot cutie.
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