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Safe Cracker

Safe Cracker

Studio: Coast to Coast
Category:  Classic , Feature film
Directed by: ,
Starring: , , , , , , , ,
Released on: 
Where to buy:DVD NewDVD RentStreaming/Download
astroknight's ratings for Safe Cracker:
Overall Rating 1.5 stars
Safe Cracker overall rating 1.5 stars
Female Looks Safe Cracker Female looks rating 3 stars
Male Looks Safe Cracker Male looks rating 2.5 stars
Sex Safe Cracker Sex rating 2.5 stars
Plot/Acting Safe Cracker Plot/Acting rating 2.5 stars
Extras Safe Cracker DVD Extras rating 0 stars
Audio/Video Quality Safe Cracker A/V Quality rating 2 stars
Rating Scale
Reviewed by astroknight  on  1/26/2008

The Little Details

Running Time: 78 min. (the IAFD listing shows a running time of 85 min., so this feature may be edited from its original form)

Production Date: 1991

Director: Britt Morgan and Jace Rocker

Cast: Alice Springs, Angela Summers, Britt Morgan, Jeanna Fine, Leilani, Felipe (listed here as Vinnie DeMarco), Joey Silvera, Sikki Nixx, and Tom Byron

The Short Story

Initial Expectations: I remember watching this one over a decade ago, but that's about all I remember of it. With Britt Morgan, Angela Summers, and Jeanna Fine I can't help but have a few hopes for it.

Initial Reaction: It's not horrible when compared to a lot of the other movies that were being put out when it was released, but it is very forgettable.

Who Should Watch It : Anybody wanting a simple couples friendly feature

Who Should Avoid It: Anybody wanting nastier sex

The Technical Stuff

Audio /Video Quality: The technical aspects are a little below average. The audio is free of background noises, but has a slightly muddy sound that isn't any surprise with the age of the movie. The video is presented in the full frame format, and lacks a little. There's a bit of pixelation and much of the movie is a little on the dark side. This isn't a bad looking or sounding release when one considers the age, but it isn't too impressive either.

Music: The music is every bit as cheesy as one expects from an early nineties porno, but has a surprisingly good balance with the rest of the audio.

Disc Complaints: There is over two minutes of phone sex crap that you can't skip before the main menu. You can scan through them, but it still pisses me off. I'm deducting a half point from the overall score because of this.

Menus: The main menu is just a still of the boxcover with the choices, which isn't surprising but also doesn't give the best of first impressions. The chapter menu is extremely generic and lets you choose a scene based on a small clip of each scene.

The Feature

When bank examiner Joey Silvera notices the numbers not adding up right at Britt Morgan's bank, Britt knows they could be in quite a bit of trouble for the money they've been taking liberties with. With the help of tellers Jeanna Fine and Angela Summers, they try to figure out how to get him to not pay quite so much attention to the numbers, and think a few of the right figures just might help.

Scene 1 – Britt Morgan and Filipe

After reading through a very creative application, Britt takes matters into her own hands, as well as her mouth, with Filipe. She works him over orally as he sits on her desk and gives him plenty of great eyes before they strip down and he starts licking her nipples with a few kisses for her tits as well as her mouth mixed in. Filipe moves down and kisses his way around Britt's thighs before licking her hairy pussy. He rubs his cock around her pussy before fucking it missionary style and then stands with his back to the wall as Britt sucks and strokes him to a nice pop in and around her mouth.

This is an okay scene. Britt looks every bit as great as I remember her looking, and her oral skills are fantastic here. She does a great job with both the sucking and stroking as well as taking the facial. Unfortunately, her oral skills aren't enough to make this a great scene. One position and out does nothing for me, and the scene is also extremely dark with fairly weak camera angles. This scene might make it to the average mark.

Scene 2 – Alice Springs and Joey Silvera

When Alice heads over to bank examiner Joey's, she's not content dropping the records with him and decides to drop his balls as well. She attacks him with a hard kiss before laying back on the couch for him to suck her tits and eat her pussy. Alice reciprocates on Joey's cock before laying back on the couch and letting him fuck her missionary style. They also get in some doggie fucking before Alice takes the facial finish.

This is a decent scene. Alice and Joey have nice chemistry and put out both nice energy and nice vocals. The scene moves along at a pretty good pace, and although the camera work is limited it captures the action pretty good. This is an okay scene.

Scene 3A – Jeanna Fine and Tom Byron

After convincing Tom to help with their plan, dark haired Jeanna gets down to thank him in her own special way. She gives him plenty of eyes and tongue action as she works on his cock orally, and makes sure to mix in plenty of fast hand motion as well as taking him all the way down her throat. Jeanna has Tom eat her ass in return and then fucks her doggie style while thumbing her ass. He also fucks her missionary style before she sucks and strokes him to a nice pop on her face.

This is an okay scene that reeks of wasted potential. When scenes are edited together like they are here, the chemistry always seems to suffer. Although there's great chemistry between Jeanna and Tom, cutting this scene together with Angela and Nikki really hurts it and I always felt a little irritated when it went to the other scene. This scene should have rocked, and instead it ends up barely making it to the average mark.

Scene 3B – Angela Summers and Sikki Nixx

While Jeanna gets it on with Tom, busty dirty blonde Angela gets it on with physically challenged Sikki. They kiss and check out each other's nipples before she moves down to suck and stroke his cock. Sikki licks Angela's pussy in return before she rides him cowgirl style. Angela also lets him take her doggie style before he pops on her face.

Needless to say, this scene fell a bit short. Angela's more romantic and laid back style didn't mesh well with the more passionate and animalistic fucking between Tom and Jeanna. The segments seemed overly short, and for somebody who originally picked this one up for Angela Summers, I felt a big ripped off since this is the only sex she has in the movie. This is a very disappointing scene.

Scene 4 – Jeanna Fine and Sikki Nixx

Jeanna uses her feminine skills to convince fugly Sikki to help them out when Angela can't get him to do it. She shows him her pussy and tits briefly before he has to come in and start eating her. Jeanna slams her lips against the base of his cock as she sucks him in return, and makes sure he gets plenty of stroking and great eye contact as well. They take to the couch for him to fuck her doggie and missionary style before she sucks and strokes him to a pop in the air and on her face.

This is a pretty good scene. Jeanna looks great once again, and puts out some very nice energy and some good vocals. Sikki has a face made for radio, but he does provide a good dick for working on Jeanna and lets her show why she still has plenty of fans. The camera work was pretty average here, and the scene managed to make it just past the average mark.

Scene 5 – Britt Morgan, Leilani, and Joey Silvera

When nurse Leilani tries to give Joey mouth to mouth to bring him back from fainting, Britt doesn't see it working too well and starts sucking his cock instead. He comes back and starts sucking Leilani's tits before letting the girls know that after being so close to death he feels like fucking. Leilani and Joey strip down and start fucking missionary style as Britt sits back to watch and diddle herself. Joey also fucks Leilani doggie style before spearing her shitpussy missionary style. Britt joins in to let Joey fuck her up the ass from behind before watching him fuck Leilani's ass doggie style from below and then letting him pop on Leilani's ass so it ran run across her pussy and into her mouth.

This is a decent scene. Britt adds a bit of bad humor with some of her comments, and I love how she sits back to watch and diddle herself before getting in on the action. Both girls take it up the ass nicely, but the pop shot was easily the best moment of the scene with Britt eagerly diving into Leilani's cunt to eat Joey's cum out of it as it ran down from her ass. This is quite possibly the best scene in the movie.

Safecracker is a light porno comedy that's pretty easy to forget. There's plenty of corny lines dropped throughout the movie, and many of them are painful even by porno standards. Britt Morgan and Jeanna Fine are easily the leaders in the movie, with Angela Summers and Joey Silvera mostly providing a bit of extra comedy relief, and do an okay job. Nothing about Safecracker ever seems like it's trying to be a top notch production, and in a way that laid back fooling around feel helps it because you can't take it too seriously. Sadly, that laid back feeling continues into the sex, which is very average. The scenes often leave plenty to be desired due to low lighting, limited positions, and limited camera angles, but there is some nice chemistry that makes some of the scenes feel like they should have been much better that what ended up in the movie. Safecracker might be worth checking out if you're a fan of the cast, but otherwise is easily left in the dust of history.

The Extra Stuff

There's a screen showing boxcovers of other releases. Yawn.

The Down -n- Dirty Sex Stuff

Themes: Straight, rimming (male > female), interracial, group, voyeurism, and anal

Raincoat Factor: Medium

Condom Usage: None

The Bottom Line:

Currently, Coast to Coast's classic line of DVDs can be found online for between about $6 and $20 with several stores offering them for under $10. Aim low here. The movie isn't bad, but there's nothing that makes it too memorable either. The sex is average, the technical aspects can't quite make it to that level, and there's no effort put into the extras. This one leaves a bit to be desired.

Note to Coast to Coast: Thank you for pricing releases like this cheap enough that stores can offer them for very low prices.

If you have any questions or comments, please e-mail me .

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