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Rocco Meats the Princess
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Rocco Meats the Princess

Studio: Evil Angel
Category:  Feature film
Directed by:
Starring: , , , , , , , , , ,
Released on: 
Where to buy:DVD NewDVD RentStreaming/Download
Renee's ratings for Rocco Meats the Princess:
Overall Rating 2.5 stars
Rocco Meats the Princess overall rating 2.5 stars
Female Looks Rocco Meats the Princess Female looks rating 4 stars
Male Looks Rocco Meats the Princess Male looks rating 3 stars
Sex Rocco Meats the Princess Sex rating 3 stars
 
Plot/Acting Rocco Meats the Princess Plot/Acting rating 3 stars
Extras Rocco Meats the Princess DVD Extras rating 3.5 stars
Audio/Video Quality Rocco Meats the Princess A/V Quality rating 2 stars
Worth$10.00
Rating Scale
Reviewed by Renee  on  12/14/2004
Rocco Meats the Princess – This is a Siffredi-style take on a fairy tale, transposed to modern-day Prague. There are three main scenes, each preceded by Rocco and his cameraman/cousin Gabriel hanging out in the historic part of town.

Scene 1: Rocco and Gabriel go to a large villa, where they meet up with two (supposed) college girls. Nicky looks rather confident, while the brunette with glasses looks a bit out of her element (normally the classroom?). Rocco spends most of the scene with Nicky, who was quite a match for him. She was able to take his semi-rough manner with a lot of enthusiasm. She even had a little surprise for him, which you hear when he blurts out, "The nasty bitch – she stick her finger up my ass!" During some spirited anal, she turns around and tells him "Fuck you!" with a saucy look in her eye. He took it all in good spirits.

Midway through the scene, another couple arrives, Chiara with short hair and a guy who's supposed to be her boyfriend. These two go through some vaginal sex, then abruptly after the anal starts, Chiara lets out some emphatic Ow's, then walks away from the set. Rocco wails, "But I was going to fuck her ass later." Tough luck, Rocco.

Chiara does come back fully dressed at the very end, in time for a facial from Rocco, who then asks her some post-scene questions:
Why did you leave?
I didn't like the anal sex.
Why?
It was too painful. This other guy went too hard and too fast.
Rocco looks in the camera, and says all-knowingly, "This is true, you have to go slow." You could call this reality porn.

Well, Rocco shouldn't have been so surprised. Chiara clearly told him in the BTS footage that he was too big for her, she might let him finger her anally, and that she's only into doing anal with her boyfriend (Apparently, she'd been hired to only do a vaginal sex scene). Still, he doesn't get the hint, and must say 20 times to her, "It's too big? Really, is too big? No, it's not too big, yes? Is really big?" What a nudge.

Scene 2: Rocco arrives at another large house, where he manhandles buxom Mandy, then follows brunette Tanja upstairs to a bedroom for a brief POV scene (more about this unusual segment later). Meanwhile, downstairs in the billiard room, we first glimpse The Princess, looking very pretty and regal as a male performer places a small tiara on her. He does her in a couple positions, then they are joined by Mandy, Tanja, and another man.

Poor Princess – for the rest of the scene, she's left literally in between the other copulating couples, without much to do except look pretty. Mandy gives a decent performance, but the two men are forgettable, and compared to Rocco, have little style.

Scene 3: Rocco arrives back at the large house – an older woman tells him there's a girl crying upstairs, he better go get her. Up he goes, and it's The Princess! "Where is my crown, Rocco?" she plaintively asks. Once he places it on her head – Voila! Her skimpy black outfit magically turns into a skimpy white outfit, she smiles adoringly at him, with music swelling in the background (I'm not joking about the music). Rocco is now Prince Charming. Does this sound like a Walt Disney movie yet? Rocco proceeds to gently fondle the Princess, and for once takes his time, making certain she feels some pleasure (not one of his usual hallmarks, by the way). The regular sex between them is on the slow side, but intense nonetheless. Especially nice is when they are in reverse cowgirl on the bed, he reaches down and gently rubs her clit. Within 20 seconds, she's having a visible orgasm, which absolutely delights Rocco. I kid you not, this is the first time I've seen him do such a thing (focus solely on a woman's pleasure), and I've watched a good 60 scenes of his filmed over the years. Who knew? There's also a nice spooning segment, with Rocco grasping Princess and kissing her passionately all the while.

There's a break, then a long time during which Princess fingers herself anally, with Rocco greedily licking and sucking her fingers before, during and after. There's some brief anal sex, which ends with Princess standing up, saying sweetly, "Rocco, you broke my ass." "No I didn't", he protests somewhat sheepishly. They finish in a standing cowgirl, and then with a facial. As the camera fades, Princess smiles adoringly at her Prince Charming, with gentle music playing in the background.

And they lived happily ever after…

Not quite. In the bonus footage, there's a lot more of the anal sex from this scene, and it's apparent that it was uncomfortable for Princess, plus Gabriel must tell her every 10 seconds "Be sexy!" It was a good decision to cut it out.

Overall impression: That could be summed up in one word – uneven. When Rocco's on screen, the energy is pretty high, but the other men in the movie just can't measure up to his style and skills. The flow during the group sex scenes was just bumpy. It would have been better in the first scene to just let Rocco and Nicky go at each other, what with their enthusiasm and all. Annoyingly, you see the camera continually pan over towards the actress with the glasses, with a shocked look on her face. Kind of kills the pleasure of the viewing.

Also uneven was the video and audio quality, though neither of these conditions is unusual for a Rocco film. Too many times there's either too much or too dim lighting, particularly in the first scene. Just as annoying is poor audio in occasional portions of the film, making it difficult to understand anything the performers are saying. Frankly, about a quarter of the film has the look and sound of a home movie, rather than a commercial porn offering.

As mentioned above, there was one segment that I found unusual, in fact very off-putting. The brief POV sex between Rocco and Tanja in the second scene was nothing remarkable – except that it was filmed in a child's bedroom, which I've never witnessed before in a porn film. You can clearly see a bunk bed, large stuffed animals, a girl's doll, a mini-trampoline, a dart board, a Tweetie Bird mobile, a small rocking horse, a large plastic ball, even crayon marks on a wall. My first reaction to this was shock, then disgust.

It was confirmed by another porn director on the ADT message board that this is indeed a real child's bedroom, from a house in Prague. I firmly believe that anything related to real children has no place in a porn film. I consider the decision to use this room for a sex scene to be the height of bad judgment; I lowered my rating of the movie accordingly.

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