|Hustler's Real College Girls 3 (2002)|
Candy Cooze, Nikkita Kash, Chrissy Sparks, Celestine, Susan, Jane, Maria, Candice, and Nicki
Single Sided, Single Layer
1.33:1 (full frame)
Animated main menu with full motion video; FMV chapter selection menu; 20-photo picture gallery; trailers for Asian Fever, Anal Intensive, The Ball Buster, Barely Legal, The Brazilian Snake, Black & Wild, Hustler's Real College Girls, DJ Groupie, Snoop Dogg's Doggystyle, Ghetto Booty, Hot Showers, Hustler XXX, Jail Babes, Mr. Beaver, Pornovision, Precious Pink, Superfuckers, and Young Sluts
Barely legal or college girl lovers; anyone who likes to see young, fresh talent
Bullshit-averse people, anyone who thinks barely legal porn is not their cup of tea
College girls, barely legal, newcomers, girl-girl, tattoos, toys, oral cumshots, dirty talk, piercings, interracial
If You Liked This DVD, You Should Enjoy
Hustler's Real College Girls series
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The First Word: Hustler's Real College Girls series tries to take the college coed fetish to a new level of reality but they can't fool anyone but the foolish. It's still some decent newcomer porn though...
What's It About?: This series is supposed to be about actual college students who answered a classified ad for nude modeling. But let's get one thing straight: it's all bullshit. Not only do the girls sound like they're delivering lines, but there are none of the awkward moments that one would expect when meeting someone who is going to pay them money to screw on camera. Besides, Bob Sima is not only the director, but he's also credited as the writer. So, if we can all just agree that it's made up, we won't feel deceived. At best, maybe these are porn stars who are actual students but pretending they go from innocent to nasty in a matter of minutes.
The video begins with a black & white introduction by a disappointing older lady named Candy Cooze. Candy is a sagging brunette with an irritating Northeastern accent, and she looks like she could be easily the mother of the girls featured in this video. She sticks out like a sore thumb compared to the young hostesses of the other segments. Anyway, Candy spends a few minutes plugging the web site that seeks new talent for Hustler Video. I'd rather not promote the web site, but a look at their FAQ page is hilarious, since it uses the euphemism "nude modeling" and advises that still photography is not less tame anymore since the action is no longer "simulated." Hey, why beat around the bush -- just say, "We're going to pay you a lot of money to have sex while we film you."
The format is the same for each of the five scenes in this volume. First, it opens with the hostess of the scene standing in front of the entrance sign to a Southern California college. After the stage is set, there's a few minutes of wandering around the campus with a big microphone labeled "HUSTLER College Girls," looking at a campus map, and then miraculously finding the girl who's hard up for cash. After a bullshit interview, the girls are asked to produce their student ID with their thumb over their name (I understand that in the first two volumes, the girls didn't always cover their names but that's assuming that the IDs were real). Then they cut to the hotel room or house where the sex takes place. As the scene progresses, the hostess ends up topless and holding a video camera (which doesn't appear to be turned on and is often pointed vaguely in the right direction. Here are the scene breakdowns, including the college these "sluts" supposedly attend:
Susan (UCLA) - Susan is a petite brunette with glasses and small, natural tits who looks and sounds like she's barely of legal age. She's told by Candy that she will be performing with a good looking guy, but when they go to Susan's house (naturally, her dad is out of town), hours go by without the guy showing up. Candy admits that she wants to do the scene with Susan, and after some staged reluctance, we've got a girl-girl scene going. Susan's illusion of innocence is destroyed when her tattoos come into view -- one on the top of her left breast, the other along one of her calves. It's a decent lesbian scene despite having to see Candy spit on Susan's box and hear her moan and talk like a New York hooker. I don't know...there's something about a girl in glasses that does it for me, and Susan wears hers throughout the scene. My biggest complaint about this scene is that the position shots are too short -- just when I'm getting into the action, it changes. Bob, slow down...we don't all have ADD!
Jane (Los Angeles City College) - Fortunately, the hostesses improve from the ancient look of Candy Cooze to the slim and sexy figure of Nikkita Kash. Jane is equally stunning: she's a pretty, slim, Nordic-looking blonde from the Czech Republic (she's the one in the pink cap on the front boxcover). And lo and behold, she admits that she's done porn before in addition to studying Business Administration. She apparently forgot to bring her ID, which Nikkita disapproves of. But the ID is at her house...coincidentally right where they are going to shoot the scene. There are few preliminaries before the blonde is sucking on two stiff ones with Nikkita watching inches away. Then, Jane is poked on both ends by the two guys in various positions while Nikkita, now topless, points the camera in their general direction. While the great doggy penetration shot is one of the highlights of this scene, the best part is when the missing ID makes its appearance for the finale -- with both guys jizzing over the student ID (it's actually a LA Valley College ID, but who cares about details) and her face. Pretty cool...
Maria (East LA College) - Chrissy Sparks is a bleached blonde, Gwen Stefani-type who introduces us to Maria, a natural blonde English girl. She says she's came to the States with her boyfriend, but he doesn't sound to me like he's from the UK. I guess it doesn't matter since the setup leads to a warehouse, where Maria is buggered by two black guys. Although there's always something appealing about an interracial scene, it just doesn't have that much heat. I was glad when they both popped into her open mouth so the video could move on to the next young thing.
Candice (Pasadena City College) - This is kind of a perverted scene when Chrissy interviews Candice, a really thin brunette, and her "father" Bob. When Chrissy asks him whether he has a problem with her daughter getting fucked, he replies, "I like Hustler" and that he thinks this is something that she would be good at. Okaaaayyyyy.... Once Candice is taken to some run-down shithole to give her career in porn a shot, we see that she is stick-figure thin and has several tattoos, including a rose tat on her left tit (what's with all of these inked titties?!?). In addition to being skull-fucked, she pleasures two guys with her mouth and pussy until she's covered with translucent cum.
Nicki (Cypress College) - Celestine is the cutest of the hostesses, making me wish that she, not Nicki was the one who was going to be the "nude model." But Nicki's no slouch either and is the most appealing of the five girls in this volume, at least to me. They go to her boyfriend's messy apartment, where the two of them immediately start kissing and getting it on. There are some great closeups -- so close that you can almost feel that you're there. Unfortunately, I didn't sense much heat from Nicki, and although the scene ends with a spectacular monster melted candle facial, she doesn't seem to enjoy it that much.
What I liked: The concept: Hey, I went to college, and I remember seeing ads for "modeling" that promised lots of money. The college co-ed desperate for cash and willing to do anything to make a quick buck is a common fantasy. Combined with Hustler's well-known focus on high-quality hardcore sex, the idea is mouth-watering. Although it doesn't hit the mark that well, it does work if you choose to look past the obvious flaws. In short, we still get to see relative newcomers to the industry, in the 18-21 year old range, get banged. The fact that they may indeed be college students in addition to having sex for pay adds to the appeal. It's no better or worse than any other Hustler video in terms of the sexual content, just hardcore with a different wrapper.
Great video shots: Anyone who has ever picked up a copy of Hustler magazine can attest to the uniquely explicit style of Hustler layouts. This also holds true in their videos. Wide open penetration shots, great lighting, acrobatic sexual positions, and playful but intense action are all hallmarks of the company's style that many other companies try in vain to replicate.
What I didn't like: The Bullshit: Fantasy requires the suspension of disbelief. Porn is all about suspending disbelief (after all, how many people are really going to fuck on camera because they want to). I mean, we all read the little stories that accompany the layouts in men's magazines and choose to ignore the disclaimer under the table of contents that the statements of the models may not actually be real. So, as long as my bullshit meter is not going crazy, I can handle that "Real College Girls" may not be "real." But in the case of Hustler's Real College Girls, I'm reminded many, many times that this is a bullshit setup. The timing, vocal stresses, body language, and really, really stupid dialogue just screams crap. Hustler tries to hard to "make" us believe that this is real. Why else would they ask the girls to show a college ID or why would they make a point to take us on a tour of the campuses? This series reminds me of the old Video Team college series (with titles like Girls of the Very Big Eight or Girls of the Packed Ten). But at least they didn't try to prove the girls in those videos were actual college students -- just a quick setup and on to the action. Here, it's almost over the top -- maybe it's that way intentionally...or maybe they just think they're really fooling us, who knows?
Tattoos: Maybe it's because all of the cute strippers and porn starlets have tats and piercings, but it totally ruins the innocent co-ed doing nasty things when they look like candidates for Skin magazine. Again, disbelief is dropped, shattering on the floor and making me get out the broom called 'reality.'
Don't tease me!: Throw me a bone here...don't use cute girls as hostesses, get them talking dirty, have them sit in the background of the scene topless, and not have them get involved! Except for Candy Cooze (who doesn't qualify as cute), none of the others added anything other than blue balls to the video.
DVD Extras: Hustler DVDs aren't known for their extensive extras, and this DVD follows suit. In addition to a 20-picture still photo gallery (the photography is very good, BTW, since Hustler's still photogs really know what they are doing), the only other special features are a bunch of trailers for other Hustler videos. Some of them are quite short (teasers) while others are on the long side. Either way, you'll get a feel for all of the different lines that Hustler produces. I would have loved to see some sort of behind the scenes feature, bloopers, or bios, especially considering the rather high price tag, but I think the feature itself probably holds its own.
A/V Quality: It's pretty good all around, but I was a little disappointed with the video image and the choice of musical editing. First, it looks like they used a filter of some sort on the camera that shows some serious vignetting -- the lens is zoomed out so far that you can see the round edges of the filter, giving the picture a slight spyglass look (see the vidcaps and look at the four corners of each image). Upon close look, the transfer has some artifacts, especially in some of the darker scenes. The decision to use only a musical intro to the sex scenes and fade out to production sound only leaves a little too much silence for my tastes. I would have preferred a barely audible music track to the being able to hear every noise in the room.
The Last Word: Hustler's on the right track...they just have to work on getting the setup a little more natural and not so obviously scripted. Look at OGV's Shane's World series -- it's scripted to some point, but the performers are allowed to ad lib and be themselves. The result: natural feeling and very hot porn. Real College Girls 3 has the hot porn, the college girls, and just needs to work on the reality part. This volume isn't a must-have, but it's worth a purchase if you're into this type of fantasy and are willing to take it with a block of salt.