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Naked Desert

Naked Desert

Studio: Vivid
Category:  Feature film
Directed by:
Starring: , , , , ,
Released on: 
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astroknight's ratings for Naked Desert:
Overall Rating 1.5 stars
Naked Desert overall rating 1.5 stars
Female Looks Naked Desert Female looks rating 2.5 stars
Male Looks Naked Desert Male looks rating 2.5 stars
Sex Naked Desert Sex rating 2.5 stars
Plot/Acting Naked Desert Plot/Acting rating 1 star
Extras Naked Desert DVD Extras rating 1.5 stars
Audio/Video Quality Naked Desert A/V Quality rating 2 stars
Rating Scale
Reviewed by astroknight  on  7/25/2000
Running Time: 1:11

Director: Layne Parker

Cast: Anna Malle, Kylie Ireland, Sandi Beach, Marc Wallice, Steven St. Croix, and Hank Armstrong

Extras: Biographies, interactive sex, previews, and Vivid's "multiple angles"

Audio / Video Quality: The audio really sucks the big one. A few spots are missing music, so all you hear is the wind. Then, when they decide to have music, it often overpowers the rest of the audio. The video quality would be okay, but I think lot of the camera work was done by somebody who probably isn't even old enough to watch the movie.

The Plot (or at least as close as I could come to one): Sandi and Steven camping in the desert and meet a friend or two while there. A mysterious woman appears to all of them at some point.

The Review: I really wish that Kylie wasn't in this movie, because if it wasn't for her, I wouldn't have watched it. The Layne Parker films I have seen are normally a lot better than this.

In the opening scene we find that Sandi and Steven are camping in their motorhome in the desert, and since nobody's around, they might as well go at it. During the foreplay between Sandi and Steven, the only sound is that of the wind. No music or anything. At least I learned something: avoid Sandi Beach. Maybe it was just bad camera work, but it looked like this may have been the first blow job she'd ever given. Plus she isn't that attractive. When we finally get sound, the audio doesn't synch at all with the video. The camera work isn't that good either. They even screwed up the cumshot. At least it can only get better.

Hank then shows up on his dirt bike and wipes out in front of them, shortly before Anna appears out of a mirage in her lingerie to pay Hank a visit. Anna does a very typical performance, including an anal scene.

Shortly afterwards we see a car racing across the desert in trouble. Luckily Kylie makes it out okay, but unfortunately Mark Wallice does also. I was cheering when I saw him in the burning car, and then they rescue the asshole. While Marc is unconscious, Anna gives Kylie a little mouth to mouth and everywhere else. Marc comes to in the middle and joins in. The sound was horrible throughout this scene, with the music overpowering the rest of the sound through much of it.

Kylie and Marc find their way to Steven and Sandi's motorhome, where Kylie and Sandi get it on. After the first scene with Sandi, I was about to skip the entire scene, however I did watch the entire scene. It wasn't as bad as the first scene, and the girls put ice cubes to some good use.

Finally, Anna reappears and everybody but Hank has an orgy around the campfire. Hank just sits back and watches. The scene is pretty average for an orgy scene, and gives everybody a pretty even amount of camera time. I think Hank maybe saw how the rest of the movie was going to look and wanted to sit this one out. I don't blame him.

The Good: Kylie and Anna looked real good and did a good job in their sex scenes. The guys also did a pretty good job.

The Bad: Sandi Beach is horrible. I almost ordered a movie the day after I watched this and then didn't when I saw she was in it. She was that bad. Also, it has Marc Wallice. Nuff said.

The Ugly: Both the camera work and Sandi Beach.

Overall: Avoid this one unless you're a huge Kylie Ireland or Anna Malle fan. Even then, think it over before you watch this one.

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The opinions expressed in this review of Naked Desert from Vivid are not necessarily the opinions of Adult DVD Talk. Adult DVD Talk provides a public forum for consumers to post their DVD reviews. Adult DVD Talk does not edit these reviews.