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Missing Persons

Missing Persons

Studio: Penthouse
Category:  Feature film
Directed by:
Starring: , , , , , , , ,
Released on: 
Where to buy:DVD New
Savoy's ratings for Missing Persons:
Overall Rating 2 stars
Missing Persons overall rating 2 stars
Female Looks Missing Persons Female looks rating 2.5 stars
Male Looks Missing Persons Male looks rating 2.5 stars
Sex Missing Persons Sex rating 2 stars
Plot/Acting Missing Persons Plot/Acting rating 1 star
Extras Missing Persons DVD Extras rating 2.5 stars
Audio/Video Quality Missing Persons A/V Quality rating 4 stars
Rating Scale
Reviewed by Savoy  on  2/2/2008
The Gist – Randy Spears pops out another featherweight feature for Penthouse Variations. To call it a feature is a bit of stretch, but I suppose because it has a storyline – however thin it may be - it technically qualifies as one. Exotica stars. Brooke Banner supports. Jayna Oso and the yummy Bobbi Starr drop in to the anal bangbang.

The Story - Courtney (Exotica) loses her husband, Eric (Evan Stone), in a boating accident. Or did she? [dum-dum-dummmm!] Her best friend and lawyer, Tonya (Brooke Banner) is there to help her work through her grief and pick up the pieces. Or is she? [dum-dum-dummmm!]

Exotica & Evan Stone - Courtney (Exotica), after thinking she saw Eric in the house, falls asleep and dreams of him.

If I were ever to use sound effects to describe a woman’s body, it would be for Exotica. She’s built like a comic book superhero. Huge fake tits. Bam! Big muscular thighs. Pow! High tight ass. Zowzee! Gorgeous face with a fierce jawline. She looks like she can kick anyone’s ass and we get to watch her be sweet with Evan Stone.

The porno lovebirds start with some foot worship before transitioning to pussy eating to blowjob to RCG to doggie to mish with a pop on the belly. Exotica keeps up the talk throughout. Lots of full body contact, deep kissing and eyes elevate this scene. Hands down the best one in the flick.

Jayna Oso, Nick Manning & Scott Nails -Tonya (Brooke Banner) encourages Courtney to get out of the house and takes her to a party. Jayna Oso blows Nick Manning at a nearby pool table. Uncomfortable, Courtney and Tonya leave, but only after discussing power of attorney details at the fireplace.

Cock sucking with a little face fucking, then onto a little cunt licking and some fingerbanging. Mish on the pool table and Scott Nails appears for a blowjob. Position change to doggie with Manning as Oso sucks Nails. RCG with Nails on the floor who gives her a nice piston fuck – best in the scene. Anal in RCG with Manning then standing anal with Nails. Two facials finish off the scene. Not much to write home about.

Nick Manning should only appear in sex scenes that take place in the bowels of hell.

Bobbi Starr & Justice Young - After another Eric-sighting and Tonya pushing meds onto Courtney, the detective (Van Styles) does a little detecting and finds an insurance policy and a little of the naughty-naughty on Eric’s computer. For some unexplained reason (most likely to ensure we have 5 sex scenes), Eric and Tonya have been shooting porn. Bobbi Starr and Justice Young are the hired guns.

Bobbi Starr is delicious. Period. She reminds me a little of Ione Skye in 1989 with her blue eyes and wide mouth. Even the lack of flow in editing can’t take away from her charisma. Wet blowjob/handjob segues to 5 seconds of cunnilingus than onto some jumpy-cut mish. Doggie then anal in spoon position. Abrupt cut to Starr bent with her ass in the air and jerk-to-pop on her asshole.

There are much better Bobbi Starr scenes out there.

Brooke Banner & Evan Stone -The bad guys argue. The bad guys boff. Brooke Banner naked is what I imagine Olive Oyl would look like naked. Long neck. Long arms. Long tits. Long torso. Long legs. With a gelfling haircut.

Eric eats her puss a little then Tonya returns the favor. Onto mish in a barstool and back to head then back to mish. Side-riding cowgirl. Doggie and pop on the kisser with her spitting out every last drop of semen.

Totally boring scene.

Exotica & Van Styles - The detective breaks down the deceitful scheme for Courtney. She is upset and out of nowhere gets googoo eyes for the protective detective. She shows her appreciation with a screw in the kitchen.

Deep kisses, a blowjob and doggie with a leg up on the kitchen counter. More head. Pussy lick. Mish then spoon on the counter. Pop on those huge fake chichis.

There’s more story after this, but it’s so lame who really cares.

OverallMissing Persons is a forgettable piece of porn. Folks only looking for hot sex are going to be disappointed and frustrated with the way sex scenes were shot and edited – low to no stroke-ability. Sporting a very claustrophic feel and shot entirely in a single house with a painfully static camera, I never realized how much I appreciated watching the lines of the human body whilst fucking until I was presented with this title. Sex scenes consist of extreme close-up of breast, ECU of cooch, ECU of face, ECU of dick, ECU of back, ECU of face, etc. I wanted to smack the camera back to open up the shots. There’s no beauty, flow or grace to the editing; it either clods along like some clumsy 300 lb. fat kid or jumps all around like a tyke with ADD. Folks looking for a good story are going to be disappointed by its flat simplicity and predictability. Don’t even get me started on the canned porno music.

The only people I would recommend this to are hardcore Exotica fans – the lemming variety. No, scratch that. I’m a lemming variety Randy Spears fangirl and I still realize this movie is crap. Not recommended at all. This is the sort of flick that gives features a bad rap.

DVD Extras – One bonus scene: Kasey Kroft & Erik Everhard from “Sex To Die For”. Photo gallery, BTS, and trailers.

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The opinions expressed in this review of Missing Persons from Penthouse are not necessarily the opinions of Adult DVD Talk. Adult DVD Talk provides a public forum for consumers to post their DVD reviews. Adult DVD Talk does not edit these reviews.