In a prologue—which in fact is really an epilogue—Alex LeMonde that mouth-watering Canadien stares at the sea bemoaning his lost love whom he last saw disappearing into that vast expanse of water with a strange being. Alex speaks of his regrets at his shameful treatment of his lover Joe and his own infidelities. Now, in this cautionary tale, Alex warns us “If you mistreat your boyfriend he [the merman] may show up and take him away from you….forever.”
We jump back to the time when Alex and Joe were together. The camera shows us a photo of the lovers on a bedside table and then pans over to show them together in bed. Joe is sleeping, but Alex is awake. He begins taking care of his morning stiffy. And a nice hard long one it is. Alex licks his finger and runs it under the foreskin. As Joe awakens and moves to kiss Alex, his head is forced down onto the throbbing dick. Alex gives him orders throughout, and uses his foot to push Joe’s head down to his ass so he can rim the hole. At one point he sits on Joe’s face for the Aussie’s tongue to go in even farther. Although Joe’s cock is out its confining briefs and begging for attention, Alex ignores it. Alex is concerned only with his own pleasure. With Joe lying on his stomach, Alex fucks him. Pounding into him in various positions. “You’re my hole,” he tells the supine stud. Alex spews his load onto Joe’s back and abruptly gets up. “What have I become?” Joe complains, “A cum rag?”
Later as Joe strolls along the beach, musing about this one-sided relationship, a head appears from the waves and watches. As Joe catches sight of the onlooker, it vanishes.
Unfaithful Alex has found himself a new boyfriend. It is none other than the champion deep-throater of all time, Matt Summers. Matt, a truly amazing performer who claims to have no gag reflex, can swallow anything that fits between his lips. As they begin to make out, we see Joe peering in the window. Alex simply draws the blinds and draws out his dick for Matt to swallow. In short order, Alex balls are nestled against Matt’s chin. All the while Alex tells Matt how much better he is than Joe. Well, sexually he is! But there’s more to a relationship than incredible earth-shaking, mind-blowing sex, isn’t there? (If you answered “yes” to that question for god’s sake tell me what the hell it is!) Alex really reciprocates here. He and Matt share about a gallon of spit. Alex sucks on Matt’s toes, laps hungrily at his asshole, and is rapacious in his devouring of Matt’s dick. Despite the fact that there is no anal penetration, it is a sensational scène. Alex cums on Matt’s face and then uses his hand to bring Matt off. Matt does his other peculiar trait, an ejaculatory fit that must make his first-time partners want to dial 911.
Joe is back again wandering the beach. This time more distraught than ever. With a stick he draws a heart in the sand. Then draws a jagged line through it to indicate a broken heart. The head in the sea watches this. As Joe turns and runs toward it, the head once again disappears and a large tail is seen slapping the water.
As the scene fades back in and a romantic song begins, we see two handsome feet walk out of the water. Anthony, our merman, has sprouted feet and legs. Even more importantly he has sprouted a cock. He wraps himself in Joe’s discarded blanket (Damn!) and walks over Joe's drawing of the broken heart. With a similar type of sonar that must guide him in the sea, he sets off in pursuit of lonesome Joe. He hasn’t gone far when he comes upon Brad Benton and Alex Leon just as Leon lowers Brad’s yellow swimsuit and goes down on his imposing dick. Brad is a delightful twink who seems a little more developed than when I saw him last. Even his dick looks bigger. As they kiss violently, Brad spits into Leon’s mouth. When it is Brad’s turn to fall to his knees and pull off Leon’s trunks to swallow his cock, he does so with gusto. Then climbs a tree for Leon to eat his ass. After this, Brad goes back to work on Leon’s cock and drives his tongue into Leon’s ass. (Please Santa, can I have Brad Benton for Christmas?) Brad sits on Leon’s’ cock. Brad’s own cock is as hard as the tree under which they sit. The cowboy fuck segues into a standing fuck. Brad bleats like a lost sheep as Leon plows into him and shoots a mighty load. He brings Leon to climax with a helping hand.
Anthony Merman who has watched the preceding now picks up Brad’s yellow swimsuit that was tossed in a moment of passion, puts it on (Damn again!) and goes off to find Joe. He finds the object of his search by the pool. They exchange smiles and Anthony starts toward him, but he is halted in his advance by Rob Kirk who rushes in to whisper in Joe’s ear. “Come here,” Joe is told, “You have to see this.” Joe is led away. (Anthony, I know how you feel. I was looking forward to it too. Leave it to Chi Chi to prolong our anticipation.)
What Joe and we are taken to see is a totally naked Nick Piston and Alex’s new boyfriend Matt—equally bareassed—making out on the sofa. Nick in a change of roles is going down on Matt’s cock. Matt will, of course, swallow Nick’s dick to the hilt; but Nick deep-throats Matt’s as well. I swear, Matt has the hairiest legs in the business, he’s like a satyr or goatboy from Greek mythology. Nick sticks a few fingers up Matt’s butt, as Matt continues his sword-swallowing routine. Filippo Romano who must be Nick’s lover finds them thus engaged. (Chris Steele’s screenplay—although clever—is obscure in some aspects.) As Nick is fucking Matt in the missionary position, we, and Filippo and Joe and Rob hear Matt say, “Alex never fucks me this good” Filippo feeling like a fifth wheel says while rubbing his dick through his Hawaiian swimsuit, “Sorry guys, want me to come back later.” “No way”, Matt yells out excitedly, “bring me that ole dick right now!” Matt opens wide and Filippo’s dick disappears from view. Nick sucks on Filippo’s funstick while continuing to fuck Matt. But it is Filippo who outdoes both by sucking their rods simultaneously. It’s a fine double-suck. There’s a slight lighting problem in this scene as, by photographing in front of a window, some of the action is in shadow. But it is only momentarily disconcerting. Filippo eats out Matt’s hairy hole and Nick takes over. For his part, Matt tongues Filippo’s asshole like a cat lapping cream. As Nick face-fucks Filippo, Matt finger-fucks himself; then takes over sucking Nick as Filippo sits on Nick’s face. When Filippo fucks Matt, Nick sucks Matt’s cock. All finish by spanking their monkeys. None shoots much of a load although Filippo’s is respectable. (Need more protein in your diet, boys.) Meanwhile Rob Kirk has telephoned Alex who angrily rushes in and drags Matt from the room. He now knows what it is to have a boyfriend cheat.
Finally as Joe lies in a hammock still unhappy over lost love, Anthony approaches. This time no one interrupts. “He’d never kiss me,” Joe says sadly of Alex, “I guess I know why now.” That’s Anthony’s cue and he takes it, kissing Joe tenderly. He also sucks Joe’s hither-to-neglected dick. It can’t be easy having sex in a hammock, but these guys manage quite well. It’s a lot easier though when they move indoors to a sofa. There, Joe fucks his Anthony who seems in ecstasy. A real treat for a merman I would assume where the only dick in the sea is Moby. After shooting his load, Anthony gives Joe a helping hand. In the aftermath at the pool Joe, swimming alone, tells Anthony he has a secret. I have one too that you will never guess, Anthony replies. “My secret is I love…” Joe says, breaking off in mid-sentence. Joe asks Anthony to join him in the pool, but Anthony is reluctant to do so. At last he jumps in and is immediately transformed into a merman. Although he taken aback that fish has been on his diet, Joe’s love overcomes it. “Come live with me,” Anthony implores Joe. “Where”, Joe inquires. “Take me to the ocean and you will see.” Joe lifts the merman into his arms and carries him from the pool. As they make their way to the beach, Alex appears. He watches Joe and his strange burden move toward the sea. “Joe!” he yells after them. Pleading with Joe to return he screams out, “I love you!” But it is too late. Two tails appear briefly above the waves and then are gone…forever.
Be sure and watch all the credits because at the end there is a hysterical blooper that you won’t want to miss.
To tell the truth I was so taken with this film that I forgot to get off watching it. But that can easily be remedied by putting it right back in the DVD player. A friend of mine once said of Bette Davis, “She always gives you your money’s worth.” I think that can be said of Chi Chi LaRue these days. The lady sure knows how to get the best out her performers and during the sex scenes you are surprised that smoke doesn’t appear out of the TV set.
There are great extras here. A Pop-Shot section where you can jump right to the moments of climax; a section where with your computer you can go to Chi Chi’s web site for some fun and titillation; and a Bonus section that includes a Behind the Scenes showing us how much fun it is to be on one of Chi Chi’s shoots and making us wish we could be in her films.
An uncut version of the Joe-Alex scene that opened the film. It had to be severely edited because the script demanded that Alex be indifferent to his partner, but in reality he was really turned on and carried away. Kissing Joe passionately, sucking his dick like a starving man finding food after three days. Fucking him with tenderness. WHOOSH! No wonder Chi Chi just let the cameras roll. Show this to those people who say porn stars don’t really get into it but just do it for the money and they will change that opinion right quick. Thank you, Chi Chi for including this; and giving us all a reminder of just how important an editor is.
I’m shutting down my computer now and heading for the nearest ocean. There I will draw a broken heart in the sand, and sit waiting for my own merman to rise from the foam and stride forth from the sea. Well, maybe I'd just better watch this one again instead.