|Internal Affairs 3 (2001)|
The cream pie fetish creates an interesting challenge to porn producers: find girls who are willing to have a guy ejaculate inside them in an age of "safer" sex and capture it in a visually exciting way. Luc Wylder solves the first problem for Internal Affairs 3 by using performers who are couples, such as Jessica Drake and Evan Stone, to do the internal pop shots. The second problem rears its boring head in almost every scene in the form of a "cum hunt." When you ejaculate inside a vagina, it usually takes gravity, time, and some probing to find proof of the deed. In this video's case, it's not visually exciting at all to watch footage of finger probing, off-camera advice on how to get the cum to flow, and then finally a few drops of semen. For example, the first scene is over 25 minutes long, and most if it is in search of the elusive pop.
This video has many other problems, not the least of which are the fake breasts. They range from okay to beach balls to really bad, and they totally ruined the experience for me. Another problem is the male talent -- Evan Stone is the best looking of the bunch, which is okay if you like Evan Stone. But the rest of the guys are pretty mediocre, especially Rob with his pot belly and Axl with his long bleached blonde hair. I realize that when you use performers who are real-life couples you cut down on your talent pool, but that doesn't mean that we have to buy it. I could go on and detail other physical flaws with the stars, but I won't to avoid being a complete ass. The sex is pretty vanilla and not very appealing, save for a few seconds of Evan and Jessica doing it doggystyle.
Next, the production value is pretty poor -- it's only a couple steps up from an amateur video. Some set lighting would have helped a lot since the video is pretty dark throughout. Finally, I really could do without Luc and Alexandra Silk's over-the-top scene intros. They act like they're hosting a PBS after school special with their patronizing lead-ins. I mean, is it really necessary to play with whipped cream? It's not like we need the innuendo since we know that it's a cream pie video. Ugh. Please, do yourself a favor and bypass the Internal Affairs line and check out some other studios' efforts, such as Red Light District's Cum Drippers.